Chapter 38
CHAPTER 38
A t the beginning of this year, I wanted to commit suicide. The guilt and trauma from watching my father die in front of me left me alone and desolate. Now, passing a puck between my brother’s best friends made me realize how much more life there was to live. It wasn’t about the family I had left, but the family standing right in front of me. Even Kennedy was here. Albeit she sat in the stands with a scowl on her face and the world’s most obnoxious pair of earmuffs on, but she was still here.
Jackson laughed and slapped the puck out of Axel’s possession, the two of them shoving at each other to regain control. We were playing three on two, with Jackson, Hunter, and me on one team, and Crew and Axel on the other. It started as a legitimate effort to practice for next week and quickly devolved into a fun-spirited scrimmage. Cooper wasn’t with us. Crew said he was at his night class, but I didn’t miss the goalie. It was nice to play without the pressure of one.
“Alright dickwads and dickwadettes,” Axel announced. I stopped skating and waited for whatever nonsense was sure to follow .
“First team to score three wins, losers buy dinner and first round of drinks at The Pub.”
Jackson smirked. “You sure you want to make that bet? Didn’t you max out your credit card last Pub Wednesday?”
“Fuck off Rae, I won’t lose, so it doesn’t matter.”
“I’m in.” Hunter stopped next to me and leaned over, “Axel is fucked, he might be a giant, but you Rae’s have speed.”
I played with my mouth guard and nodded in agreement. We set ourselves up for an impromptu face-off, Jackson versus Axel. I positioned myself to the back right of Jackson and Hunter stood opposite of me. Crew placed himself in a similar position opposite of Hunter.
People say twins have intuition with each other. I’ve never believed it before, but when Jackson faced off with Axel, a tickling sensation told me he was going to pass behind to me. Pushing forward simultaneously with his pass, I captured the puck and slipped past Axel and Crew before they realized what was happening. In a flash, I was down the ice and lining my shot up with the goal. Axel cussed and Crew grunted, trying to gain speed on me.
Time slowed down, and I inhaled through my nose.
One Mississippi, deep breath Maci girl.
Two Mississippi, relax your shoulders.
Three Mississippi, SHOOT!
Dad’s voice coached me through the wrist shot that sailed into the empty net. I swung my legs around, stopping my forward progression with a spray of ice, and smiled. Axel and Crew groaned.
“Easy peasy, boys. That’s how it’s done.” Skating back down the ice, I bumped pads with Hunter and my brother.
Kennedy cheered loudly from the side, “THAT’S MY BEST FRIEND! SUCK ON IT, PUCK BOYS!”
Axel grumbled, “Who invited the brunette pixie again?”
“I heard that, he-who-thinks-he’s-the-Mountain! ”
He rolled his eyes, and we set up for another face off. In the end, we won two to one. Kennedy kept happy dancing in her seat and Crew ribbed Jackson for a failed pass he made to Hunter earlier. Hunter came up behind me and wrapped me in an embrace. “You think you’re ready for this, Sunshine?” His warm breath tickled my cold ear.
Was I ready? Physically, my body was back in shape. The last few weeks of continuous hockey practice and morning workouts paid off. Gameplay was muscle memory. The moment I picked up a stick, it all came rushing back to me. That left the biggest hurdle—me. I’ve always been my own biggest critic. Before, I was a cocky son of a bitch on the ice, much like Hunter. My confidence took a hit this last year, but looking back, I’m not the same girl as I was six weeks ago. Something clicked, and I knew I wanted this badly.
“Honestly? I think I’m about as ready as I can be.” I leaned back into his chest, letting his warmth seep into my back.
He hummed, “Want to know what I think?”
In front of us, the others had made their way to the side of Kennedy. I watched as they bantered and laughed together. Jackson playfully shoved her and Axel howled when she pinched and twisted his nipple in retaliation. Watching the two of them was like watching cats and dogs.
“What do you think, Mr. St. James?”
“That you better pick out a place for your gold medal, because not only do you have a spot on Team USA, you’re going to win too.” He kissed my cheek lightly, letting me go and joining the others.
Leave it to Hunter to melt my insides with just one sentence. His confidence was infectious, and I chuckled as I headed to join him.
“Come on, losers, I want my free basket of cheese balls!”
Axel groaned, “Crew, please tell me you can pay..my mom put my credit card in a block of ice.”