Chapter 2
Addison
In the past week that I’ve been home, I’ve hardly left my room. With an ensuite bathroom and a mini fridge, I didn’t really need to.
My days mostly consist of sleeping and gaming.
Unfortunately, my friends are hardly online.
Apart from the first night I was back, I haven't really gotten the chance to play with or speak to them. They pop in to talk in the chat for a few minutes, but all three of them seem to have very busy lives. They say it’s because of work, and I’ve been tempted to ask what they do for work, but that would step over the line of our online personas into our personal lives.
The only things we really know about each other are our ages, designations, and the country we live in. We’re all in the US.
The first few days home, I started to spiral with so much free time on my hands.
I’ve built my nest, rearranged my whole room, read five books, and beat a whole new game.
After spending hours searching online for jobs, I came up empty-handed. Either I don’t have enough job experience, don’t qualify, or they’ve filled the position.
If I don’t find something soon, I’m going to have to fulfill my end of the deal I stupidly made with my mother.
I know I sound like an ungrateful brat. I have a place to live, food to eat, and no bills to pay, when I could be back in Nashville, homeless and starving. I am thankful that my mother allowed me to come back home.
I just don’t like her conditions. Okay, fine, maybe I should find a pack. I’m twenty-five. Most Omegas are packed up by now.
I want Alphas, I do, but I want to find them organically. Not by shacking up with whoever my mother thinks would be a good fit. I can tell you right now, they wouldn’t be.
I highly doubt the kind of people she associates herself with would want an Omega like me.
I’m not the kind of Omega who would stand by your side, smiling and nodding like a trophy wife.
It’s not only my style that stands out, but my personality too. I love to talk. I curse like a sailor. I laugh too loud. I joke too much. And I’m sarcastic as hell. I’m hyper, bright, and bubbly.
Everything about me would cause me to stand out. I don’t mind having attention on me, though, I’m used to it. Not that I crave it, it’s just how it is. I’m aware that walking out of the house in the kinds of clothes that I wear draws attention.
Gaining the attention of the rich and powerful isn’t something I want. I don’t need their snooty looks and harsh whispers.
Maybe I’m overthinking things and judging people before giving anyone a real chance. Maybe it’s because while I want a pack, the pack I want isn’t an option. It isn’t one that I can just go out and meet.
So for now, I’ll go on whatever dates my mother sets me up on. I’ll play her game long enough to save the money I need to get out on my own and do things my way, at my speed.
And who knows? Maybe, just maybe, I’ll find a good pack. Good Alphas who will be perfect for me.
I’m never one to write things off completely.
That's partly why I’ve been holding on to these stupid little crushes I have on three guys whose faces I’ve never seen.
For all I know, they could be weird, creepy old men living in their mothers' basements.
With their deep, rich voices, they don’t sound like old men, though.
“Ugh.” I throw myself back onto my bed, grabbing my stuffed bunny.
She’s pink and fluffy and soft to touch.
She’s a security blanket of sorts. Something I’ve had for years that has helped me through all the hard times.
“What do I do, FooFoo?” I stroke my fingers through her soft fur.
“How can it be this hard to find a job?”
Mom called from Paris last night and said she will be back from her work trip next week.
Maybe if I can get a job by then, and show her that I’m trying, then maybe she might let me stay and hold off on the whole ‘finding a pack’ thing.
Probably not, but miracles are possible, right? With my mother, it’s not something I’d hold my breath on.
I send Cae a text, asking her how she’s doing and letting her know how I am. I haven’t told her that I’ve moved, I’m still kind of embarrassed about it.
If she knew what was really going on, she’d feel bad, guilty, that she left me behind to struggle, and it’s not a problem to worry herself with.
This is on me.
I feel like I’m toeing the line between being a grown-up and still feeling like a sheltered kid.
I moved away, lived on my own, and went to college. I’ve done the late-night study sessions and the never-ending hours of school work. I’ve lived the life of a college student.
What I didn’t prepare for was what came after, when I was thrust out into the real world.
Maybe my mother is right. I wasted years in school and now have nothing to show for it. I’ve always told myself I had time, that I’m young. Why commit to something for the rest of my life?
Now I’m starting to see how important it is to have a plan in life.
After taking a shower, I head to my computer, put my headset on, and log into Twisted Valley.
My heart kicks into overdrive, a nervous flutter taking over my belly when I see that all three of my guys are online.
“Hey!” I turn my mic on. “Welcome back.”
“There’s our girl,” Waffle chuckles. “Missed you. Sorry, we’ve been so busy.”
“Yeah, life sucks sometimes.” Grim sighs dramatically.
“What are you talking about?” Waffle snorts. “Your life is fucking amazing, and you know it. Stop acting like it’s a hardship.”
My brows pull together. How does Waffle know about Grim's life? I thought we didn’t talk about our outside lives?
“Okay, yeah, you’re right. But work takes up so much of our time, how are we going to spend time with our Princess?” Grim playfully whines. His husky voice and longing tone cause a shiver to run down my spine.
Hearing him call me their Princess has me biting my lip.
“Hey, Death. You there, man?” Waffle asks. “I see you’re online.”
Instead of answering through the mic, he texts back in the chat.
FatalDe@thWish: Yeah, I’m here. Sorry, can’t go on mic. Gone for work, using my laptop.
“Ahhh. Shitty. That's okay. Ready to kick ass?” Grim asks.
“Yup.” I smile. “Ready.”
For the next hour, we work together on raids, leveling up by winning races and stacking up our inventory. I forgot how much work this game could be.
It’s been years since we’ve played this game. My laptop wasn’t powerful enough to run the graphics, so it always lagged. Anytime I was able to play with the guys, we’d jump into random games.
It turns out that they have been playing together as a team in Twisted Valley, and now they are pretty high in rankings. Not going to lie, it kind of hurts to know that they’ve continued on without me.
Gaming’s something we did together for years. It was our thing, and now they do it without me.
I can’t be too upset, though, because they’ve abandoned their game to start up a new one with me.
It’s the little things that keep me holding on.
It’s stupid and pathetic. I know I need to pull myself out of this silly little fantasy and move on, grow up.
But it’s moments like this, when I feel helpless and unsure where to go in life, that they’re here for me. They make me laugh and take my mind off all my worries. They are the escape I rely on.
You can’t escape life forever, Addison. Time to grow up and be an adult.
“That was crazy! Did you see that guy? Fucker tried to blow me up with a fucking bazooka!” Waffle shouts.
“Thanks for the save, Princess,” Grim cheers as I run the guy over with my car.
“I got your back.” My leg is bouncing as we race back to our base. “But I think we should lock everything up and be done for the night. I’d hate to lose all our progress.”
“Yeah,” Grim sighs. “Probably for the best. We gotta get up early for work anyway.”
My brows pull together. Did he just say we? How does he know Waffle’s work schedule?
Once everything is saved, we log out of the game but stay in the group chat.
Leaning back in my chair, I stare at the screen, eyeing the guys’ gamer tags while I chew on my lower lip.
“You okay, Princess?” Grim asks.
“Huh?” I blink, his voice like a soothing blanket over my body, pulling me from my worrying thoughts. “Oh.” I laugh. “It’s nothing.”
“Princess,” Waffle says the word with a low growl that has my thighs clenching together. “What’s wrong?”
Licking my lips, my heart races. I’ve opened up to them before, confessing when I’ve had a bad day without going into details. Or sharing vague updates on exciting things that would happen.
“I’m kind of stressing out.”
“Why?” Waffle asks.
“Life,” I sigh heavily.
“Are you okay?” Grim sounds concerned. That makes my heart a little too happy.
“I’m okay. I’m healthy. Not in any danger. Just...”
“What?” Waffle urges.
“I need to find a job. A way to make money quickly, you know? I’ve applied to so many jobs, but nothing has worked out.”
“What was your job before?” Waffle asks. “Maybe we can help look up some job listings. Where do you live?” Grim asks.
My heart stops as shock crosses my face. I freeze. What the fuck do I say?
“Ah, never really had a job that stuck.” I groan.
“I’m not exactly the most coordinated person.
I’ve broken so much glassware and dropped so much food, it’s embarrassing to admit.
So, something in the serving industry isn’t really the best option for me,” I answer, avoiding answering the question of where I live.
“Really?” Waffle chuckles. “Your accuracy is insane when we play. It’s hard to believe it’s not the same way in real life.”
“Yeah,” I laugh nervously. “I guess real life is full of surprises.”
“Okay, so nothing in the service industry. What about cleaning? Can you do that?” Waffle asks.
We go back and forth for a good thirty minutes, and I quickly realize I’m fucking useless.
Embarrassment emanates from me as I come to terms with the fact that I’m not ready for the real world.