Chapter Thirteen
Belle
Mom stares between me and the cat for a little while longer, her eyes inquisitive. “You named him…”
“Dobby,” I confirm proudly, smiling at the new addition to our family. He’s already gained a pound since we’ve had him. Now that he doesn’t have to hunt for food, he eats whenever he can and begs for treats.
Mom continues watching him, and I can see the question form on her face before she voices it.
Why? I pick Dobby up, waving the paw that’s just a little bit darker than the others.
It makes him look like he’s wearing a sock.
And he kind of looks like Dobby from Harry Potter. I can’t explain why, he just…does.
“Can’t you see the resemblance?” I ask, holding him out in front of her face so she can get a better look.
We’ve watched the Harry Potter movies a million times.
I made her take the test to see which Hogwarts house she was in and made her do the sorting hat when we went to the first ever store in New York City.
We got Hufflepuff and bought matching sweatshirts and keychains to commemorate the occasion.
The woman I look so much like (and could be twins with if I were about twenty pounds lighter) makes a thoughtful noise. “I can see it. Dobby. I like it.”
I beam, even though I’m pretty sure she doesn’t see it at all. “Here. Hold your grandchild. I have to finish these sketches.”
She takes Dobby and holds him like a baby while I go back to the sketches I’ve been working on for the past week. Before I know it, I’ll need to present these to the planning board and want to make sure everything is perfect.
Mom sits down on the armchair in the corner of my home office. “You haven’t told me how things with Dane are going.”
I stop what I’m doing. Oh. My. God. I totally forgot about Dane. Slowly, I turn to her with a bewildered look on my face. “Um…”
She frowns. “What? Why do you look constipated?”
The expression wipes off my face. “I do not look constipated!”
Mom rolls her eyes. “I’ve taken care of you since you came out of me. I know what you look like when you haven’t pooped in days. I also know what you look like when you have blowouts—”
“You’re gross,” I cut her off, watching her smile at me in amusement. “My bowel habits are perfectly fine, thank you. And there’s nothing to say about Dane. We went out a couple of times. When I get these plans approved, I’ll hire him for the job.”
I really need to text him. Has he texted me?
It’s been days. Maybe a week. Or longer?
I’m not even sure when the last time I heard from him was.
It may have been when I apologized for leaving our meetup early and explained I had a horrible migraine.
He’d told me to feel better and reach out whenever I felt okay.
And…I didn’t.
I’m the worst. This is why I’m single.
Mom’s shoulders dip with the weight of disappointment. “That’s it? When are you seeing him again? Where did you go out? I thought you’d give me more details.”
I grip the pencil in my fingers a little tighter as I turn my chair toward her. “We had dinner the first time and drinks the second. But I had to cut drinks short because I had a migraine. We haven’t seen each other since, and we don’t have any plans to.”
Her shoulders slump further. “Oh no. Did you talk to your doctor about trying that new medication I sent you the link of? The trials seemed to have worked for other people. I really thought the piercing was working its magic since you got it.”
The daith piercing was a last-ditch effort when I saw it go viral for migraine relief. I had it done a year ago. Has it helped? Maybe. I think I’ve had fewer migraine attacks, but it’s obviously not perfect.
“I haven’t looked into the meds you sent me,” I admit, rubbing my eyes. “I’ve been busy. But I’m okay. I promise.”
She doesn’t seem convinced, but she lets it go for now. “Do you want to see Dane again? His mother made it seem like you two hit it off. He’s been talking about you.”
It takes everything in me not to blush. “Oh,” I say weakly, trying to smile. What can I say? I think Dane is cute and considerate. He’s talented and driven. I like him. I just don’t know how much I like him. “I really don’t know, Mom. I’ll have to think about it. He’s nice.”
Her reaction makes it seem like I told her I thought he murdered puppies for fun. “Can I ask you something, sweetie?”
You’re going to anyway, aren’t you? “Sure.”
She hesitates, adjusting Dobby in her hold when he gets squirmy in her arms and then lets him down on the floor. He starts playing with some toys I bought him earlier this week. “Is there somebody else you’re interested in?”
It’s an innocent enough question, isn’t it? I wish the answer was as simple. “No.”
All she does is stare.
“No,” I repeat more firmly. “There isn’t. I’m not dating anybody. All I want is to focus on the bookstore. There’s so much to do.”
Her sigh feels heavy and full of unspoken words. “Oh, Belle…”
I know that tone. It’s the chiding one she uses on me and makes me feel bad for disappointing her. Not that she’d ever tell me she felt that way.
I drop my pencil, realizing I’m not going to finish this anytime soon with her visiting. She’s here to meet Dobby and go to dinner with me and Jesse, where his father will meet us after his work meeting is done.
“What?” I ask accusingly. She has something to say and I’d rather she just say it. “Why are you looking at me like that?”
“I’m not looking at you anyway,” she replies lightly, but it’s an obvious lie. “I’m simply thinking. That’s all.”
Is she really going to make me fish for answers? “Fine. What are you thinking about? Why did you ‘oh, Belle’ me?”
She rubs her lips together thoughtfully, weighing her options. The longer she waits, the more anxious I get. “Sometimes I think that you will always have an excuse not to live your life.”
I…
What?
I gape at her. “What does that mean?”
It’s hard to fight the offense in my tone.
I’ve done a lot with my life. How could she think I’m not living it?
I’ve owned my own club. I’m about to open a bookstore.
I’ve made a lot of money and will be financially set for a long time as long as this new adventure gets the same support Belle’s Place did.
“Don’t be offended,” Mom tells me cautiously. “I only mean that you put off certain things and always use work or moving as the reason why. When are you going to truly settle down?”
I should have known this was coming. It’s been a while since we’ve had this conversation so we’re due for it.
“I am settling down. We just moved here and I’m establishing a new business after selling my old one.
There’s so much that I have to do before I’m ready to settle down the way you did with Frank.
Times are different now, Mom. Nobody gets married and has kids early.
Statistically, more women are having babies in their thirties after establishing careers first.”
Her lips twitch, which tells me she’s holding back a response.
I give her a pointed look. “Just say what’s on your mind. You have a terrible poker face.”
Defeat crests her expression. “Don’t take this the wrong way, honey.
But you’re not like those other women. You’re not living with your significant other.
You’re living with your stepbrother. And whenever somebody tries setting you up, there’s always a reason why it doesn’t work.
He chews too loudly. He didn’t hold the door open for you. He was only five-foot-eight.”
I cross my arms. “Those are perfectly valid reasons not to date somebody.”
She deadpans. “Belle, you’re barely five-three. Five-eight is tall compared to you. And, okay, I understand not liking somebody’s chewing habits. But not holding the door open for you? Maybe he was just nervous.”
Is she kidding? “He literally opened the door, walked in, and let it close on me. And he spent the first ten minutes of the date looking at his phone to see the score of a baseball game.”
She cringes.
Yeah. Thought so.
“Look,” I say with a sigh. “I know you want me to have the life you do. You want to see me get married and have babies and a white picket fence dream. But those aren’t my dreams. I mean, yes, I want to get married.
And yes, I think I want a kid. Rushing that isn’t exactly smart, though.
You know firsthand what happens when you marry the wrong person.
I’m glad things worked out for you in the end and that you met Frank.
He’s amazing and it’s so obvious you two love each other.
But dating isn’t as easy nowadays. Dating apps and social media have made people too accessible.
Now everybody has a million options, and they think they can always do better because of what’s available at their fingertips.
And God forbid a man realizes a woman is successful, or heaven help him more successful than him, then it’s game over because of his fragile masculinity.
“Believe it or not, Mom, I have tried. I’ve gone on almost every blind date you or your friends have set me up on.
And sure. Maybe I get a little too nitpicky.
But would you rather I settle for somebody I don’t love for the sake of getting married and having kids, or waiting until I’m actually ready and doing that with somebody who I look at as my whole world? ”
She’s quiet, but it’s a no brainer what she’s thinking.
Of course she wants me to find the right person.
I don’t remember much about my dad. He left when I was too young to hold onto many core memories with him.
It’s been Mom and I for as long as I can remember until Frank and Jesse entered the picture.
She has always told me to wait until I find the right person to marry because it will make life a better experience.
I’ve met a lot of people between sports games I’ve attended, the business I owned, and the people Mom has tried setting me up with.
And not one person has stood out to me the way Frank did to her.