24. Monty
CHAPTER 24
Monty
I dropped Tasha off at home, then drove back to the gym at the Plex to work through all the unwanted thoughts and feelings our little practice session had brought to the surface. The fitness machines were on the ground floor and featured a floor-to-ceiling window wall that rose up several stories and presented a breathtaking view of the mountains.
Up until today, I could pretend I didn’t care that she hated me. I could pretend I hated her. Our rivalry was working in the gym. Good Coach Monty praised and inspired; Bad Coach Tasha glared and demanded perfection.
I could pretend she wasn’t the most beautiful and desirable woman I knew. I could ignore it when she lounged on the sofa in her tiny athletic shorts and tank top. I might have, on occasion, lowered the temperature on purpose to incite her to cover up so I wouldn’t be tempted to stare.
Before this morning, I could pretend I didn’t care about hurting her all those years ago. But now that I knew she thought I quit on her because of a health issue? I wanted to prove to her that I not only didn’t care about her occasional wind breaking but also that I did care about the trials she’d lived through and continued to face with extraordinary strength because her gut was dysfunctional.
In another way, my gut was also dysfunctional. I should have known that choosing Gabby over her would cause Tasha to write me off. They’d been competitive their whole lives. In retrospect, it had to feel like the ultimate slap in the face.
I’d just finished up on a bench press and was restacking the weights with a gym spotter when Nate came in after work. He’d changed into his FireVolts tee and shorts. My expression must have sent a signal I hadn’t intended because he lifted his hands up, palms out, like he needed to defend himself. And now I was aware of my eyebrows and chin lifting.
My resting face needed some work. Was it possible to re-train your subconscious expressions?
“I’m not interested in dating Tasha,” he said bluntly. “I swear.”
I knew he wasn’t, but why did he feel the need to state so?
I shrugged. “Neither am I.”
Now his eyebrows were reaching new heights. “I was going to text you, but since you’re here, I’ll just say it.”
“Say what?”
“She’s fragile. “
I snorted. “If there’s one thing she isn’t, it’s fragile. You saw her on the mat today, right?”
He nodded. “I’ve seen a lot of other things, too. I was here for your falling-out. I was ten feet away when she fell and broke her leg. I saw your so-called best friend DJ swoop in and try to fill your place in her life, just to prove he could. I was here six months after that, co-coaching with her, doing everything I could to encourage her to get back in the game. Which you did in less than an hour today.”
I wasn’t following. “Which, again, proves that she’s not fragile.” I crossed my arms, but my insides were glowing. He’d been trying for years to get her back into performing?
“Man, for a smart guy, you sure are dumb sometimes.” He sighed loudly in frustration and looked up at the ceiling.
I waited.
Finally, he was done taking whatever dramatic breath he needed and locked his eyes on mine. “She’s in love with you. She always has been. And she has no idea, will never admit it, and likely won’t ever act on it. But if you hurt her again, it will destroy her, even worse than the first time.”
I opened my mouth to reply, but it just hung open.
I’d never been so confused in my life.
I managed to find words. “What’s your evidence? I need hard proof.”
Nate closed his eyes and pinched the skin between his eyes, like I was causing him a headache. “Do you have all night?”
“Yup.”
He shook his head. “Just take my word for it. Her pride is everything to her. She’s tough on the outside, sure, but she breaks down, just like we all do. And a broken-down Tasha can be taken out by a toddler.”
I thought back to her flare-up. How she hadn’t wanted me to see her in her weakness. I didn’t think an emotionally broken-down Tasha could even be a thing, but what Nate was saying made sense.
Tasha put up big, strong walls on the outside to protect herself on the inside.
Cliché and common, which was why it’d never crossed my mind. To me, she was invincible and above everyone else. To her family, she was the strength when they needed help. To her athletes, she was the iron coach, incapable of bending and unwilling to compromise, even under intense pressure. And she never got heated or lost her cool.
She was icy. Competitive.
Perfect.
And she was in love with me?
Nate was right; she’d never admit it. Because love me or hate me, she needed me in her life.
And I needed her.
“So … What do I do?” I asked him.
He shrugged. “Do you love her?”
“Since I was four,” I said simply.
“Then only tell her if you’re willing to propose forever. Or you’ll lose her again, and this time, for good.”
I drove by the high school on the way home. The varsity cheerleading squad practiced just inside the fence that separated the outdoor track from the road. The football field was inside the track, and the soccer field just beyond that.
I lowered the passenger-side window as I rolled past like a creeper. Under the lights, Tasha counted out a routine for her athletes, probably for a time-out at this Friday night’s game. I glanced at the clock. Almost six o’clock. Practice was running late.
Could Nate be right? Could she have feelings for me that she couldn’t—or wouldn’t—acknowledge?
And all this time ?
Nate’s words shocked me like an errant spark from a bonfire, only the bonfire was within me in the form of a new anxiety I didn’t know how to counter.
And what of Vlad? I’d concentrated my efforts on helping Tasha fall in love with him, but it wasn’t working. Anyone could see they didn’t act like a couple who were crazy about each other.
It was too much to believe that she had those feelings for me and that none of her previous relationships hadn’t worked out because her heart hadn’t been in them.
But—what if it was true?
Back in the apartment, I took a quick shower and was setting the bar with plates and silverware when she walked in. Judging by the aroma, whatever was in the Crock-Pot was something different. I’d eat quickly and then go visit Nana until visiting hours ended.
I’d been by this morning, but I felt the urge to go again. I wasn’t sure if I wanted to ask my grandmother about her take on Nate’s theory or not, but I did want to just be with her. She was a calming presence, the only thing in my life that had always been steady and constant.
I lifted a hand to greet Tasha as she entered, hung up her team jacket, and disappeared into her room, reappearing without her backpack. She smiled at me as she passed me on her way into the kitchen.
“How are you doing?” She lifted the cover of the Crock-Pot and stirred the mixture with a large spoon.
“I’m good. Going to visit Nana after dinner. You?”
“Fine. You should take her some of this.” She collected our plates from the bar and set them next to the slow cooker. “If it’s any good. I had to modify her recipe.”
“What is it?” I asked .
“A gluten-free dairy-free version of mac ’n’ cheese with hamburger and peas.” I stared at her as she set a plate of the mixture in front of me. “Are you okay?”
I shook my head and covered my face with my hands. Why would Nana give her that recipe? I’d told her when I was eight I never wanted to eat this stuff ever again.
“Monty, you’re worrying me.” She came around the counter and rubbed my back. “What’s wrong?”
“P-peas and cheese!” I shook with grief.
“And meat,” she added. “Are you laughing or crying?”
I let my hands drop so I could look at the food. Tasha used the end of her sleeve to wipe my tears. “It’s Mindy’s favorite,” I choked out. “I haven’t eaten it since she died.”
“Oh, Monty.” Tasha squeezed her arms around my middle. “Don’t eat it, then. I must’ve misunderstood Nana. We were talking recipes the other day, and she told me this was your favorite. She probably didn’t mean for me to make it for you, just add it to my collection.”
“No, knowing Nana, this is exactly what she intended.” I freed my arm from her hug and set it around her back. “Meddling old woman.”
Tasha chuckled softly. “Silly Nana Booboo.” She looked up at me and quickly looked away, sliding out from under me. “You better get eating so you have enough time to visit. Or do you want me to box it up for you?”
I shook my head. “Nah. I’m actually dying to try it. See if it’s as good as Nana’s.”
“I wouldn’t hold out hope. Those substitutions can be disappointing.”
I waited until she returned to the bar with her own plate before I tried a bite. It was different but better in some ways. The rice pasta was a little mushy, even though she’d added it just three hours ago. She always added the pasta to whatever the mixture was before she left for her job at the high school.
“It’s really good,” I praised. “The cheese is a little different, but I think I like it better.”
“Oh stop it. You do not.” She tapped my bicep playfully.
“I do. And I’ll definitely take some to Nana. She’s going to love it.”
“Now I know you’re lying. That woman knows her food is the best of the best.”
“And yet, she’s never wanted to publish a cookbook of her recipes.”
I had her on that. She blushed but didn’t comment.
On the way to Nana’s, I called Beck for an update.
“Everything is on schedule to be finished sometime next week,” she confirmed. “If you can come by Monday for a walk-through, you can let us know if there’s anything else you want. Is your Nana ready to move home?”
“She is. She’s already planning a party.”
Beck laughed. “Glad to hear she hasn’t lost her spirit over there.”
“Quite the contrary. She’s like their queen, ruling over all the social events and game nights. I think she’s going to miss it, actually.”
“She might. But she doesn’t have you or her cat there, so there’s that. Oh!” she said excitedly. “I have an idea for the cat. I know he’s old and fat, but what would you say to a custom cat tree in the sunroom? I’ve been itching to make one. I’ll only charge you for materials. ”
I laughed. Parfait was so spoiled. “Send me the info, and I’ll run it by Nana.”
“You got it!”
I ended the call and pulled into the lot of Mountainview Manor. Halloween was next week, and they’d gone all out with the decor, inside and out. The walkways were lined with floodlights alternating in white, yellow and orange. Candy-corn buntings hung off the roof, and twinkle lights lined the windows. A scarecrow held a sign that said “Candy This Way” and pointed to a series of booths lining the walkway on the side lawn. Kids visiting their grandparents could trick-or-treat with them all next week after dinner.
It was a chilly night, and I hurried inside. “Is Nana in her room?” I asked the receptionist as she read Tasha’s ingredients list.
“Nope, she’s holding court by the aquarium.”
“Thanks.” The “aquarium” was no more than a six-by-four-foot fish tank recessed into the wall in one of the common areas.
I heard Nana before I saw her, talking about her favorite subject.
Me, of course.
“And you should see him on skates! In that enormous costume. Graceful like a swan.”
I snorted and wondered if her eyesight was going.
“Graceful as a swan, huh? Is he married yet?” An elderly man sat in a recliner near her wheelchair. She called him “Pauli Cracker” because he repeated what people said like a parrot.
Curious as to where this might go, I hid myself behind a column to listen.
“Nope, but he’s sweet on someone. ”
“How can you tell?” Clarice asked.
Nana leaned toward her. “I saw his phone.” She sat back into her chair with a smirk. “I was playing solitaire on it while he tinkered with my tablet—you remember the day I accidentally lost all my game apps?”
“I remember,” Clarice said. “Go on.”
“Well, a message flashed across the screen. It said, ‘You are my everything. I wish every day was Sunday so I could see you more’ or something like that.”
“Ooh! Who was it from?” Clarice demanded.
“Who is it from? You should stay out of his business, Nan,” Pauli advised. “Nothing good ever comes out of you meddling.”
She ignored him and smiled at Clarice. “I don’t know. He didn’t have a name attached to the number, and I couldn’t find the right screen to read any more of it—or catch the number so I could accidentally call it.”
Clarice hooted. “You are too much! Remember when he used to get mad when people called you Nancy? ‘Not Nan -cee! Nan-NA!’”
“The boy will be thirty before I blink. He’s been lonely for too long.”
Pauli snorted. “Too long! Isn’t he only twenty-five?”
“Ish. January. And that’s not the point,” Nana said.
“Not the point. Maybe he wants to be lonely,” Pauli said. “Women are expensive.”
“Says a millionaire to a millionaire about a millionaire,” Clarice pointed to him. “You old miser.”
Pauli shrugged. “Miser! Whoever it is, make sure she signs a prenup.”
“Sure, sure.” Nana waved her hand. “But I really just want to see him happy and settled before I die. ”
Okay, that was enough. I emerged from behind the column and waved to the group. “Hey, Nana!” I said loud enough for all of them to hear.
“Monty!” Her eyes brightened. “We were just talking about you!”
“Uh-oh,” I said, frowning. “Am I in trouble?”
Clarice giggled. “Maybe!”
“Shush,” Nana shouted at her. “You too, Pauli. We don’t need any of your negativity. Monty, will you wheel me back to my room? Whatever food is in that bag you’re carrying, it’s demanding to be tasted.”
“Yes, ma’am.” I handed her the bag and moved behind her chair. “’Night, Clarice. ’Night, Pauli.”
I wheeled Nana back to her room and set her up in her recliner with the rolling tray so she could try Tasha’s dinner while it was still warm. I sat on the bed and waited for her to comment.
“This is incredible! That girl has got some serious talent turning yucky foods into gourmet delicacies.” She pointed her spoon at me. “I might have more than a few bites. Don’t rat me out.”
I laughed. “Promise.” I cleared my throat. “While you eat, I, um, need to come clean about something. I heard you talking about a message you saw on my phone.”
She had the decency to look guilty, but I’d bet the cat she didn’t feel one ounce of guilt. “And?”
“I don’t have a secret girlfriend. I’m helping one of the foreign players polish his love letters to a girl he’s interested in.”
Nana’s eyes widened, and her gaze flicked over my face. But I wasn’t lying. She sighed when she realized I was telling the truth .
“That’s shady business, Montgomery.” She used my full name for emphasis. “It will come back to bite you in the butt. But what do I know? I’m just an old woman.”
“Nana, it’s fine.”
She clucked her tongue. “Speaking of girls—you should ask Tasha to move in with us.”
I choked on my saliva. “Wha- what?”
Nana chewed her food slowly, taking her time before she answered. “She told me she was moving back with her parents after Christmas because her lease is up and she’s got bills. We have plenty of rooms. And I’d enjoy her company. And her cooking. It’s better than anything Pru ever made.”
“That’s a fact,” I agreed. Our longtime housekeeper cooked the most basic staples and rarely added seasoning. “But … that would be weird.”
“Why?” Nana snapped. “Aren’t you two getting along now? I haven’t heard of any roommate issues from you or Tasha, and she told me yesterday she thought your friendship was well on its way to being restored.” She lifted her spoon and stabbed the air to emphasize her point. “You, sir, have not been the same since the two of you had a falling out; don’t try to convince me otherwise. And if you don’t ask her to move in with us, I will.”
I blew out a long breath. “It’s not a good idea, Nana. I—please, think about it first,” I pleaded. As much as I’d miss Tasha when I moved out of her apartment, I wouldn’t miss Vlad—or anyone else—picking her up for dates. Or worse—what if he—or whomever she got serious with—proposed to her on my porch or in my gazebo or?—
“You look ill, Monty,” Nana said. “Care to tell me the real reason you don’t want her moving in?”
I just stared at her .
“Thought so., You don’t have a good one, so it’s settled. Now put this in the fridge, please, and press the call button. It’s been a long, emotional day, and I’m ready for bed. Come give your Nana a hug.”
I hugged her fiercely. “I love you, Nana. I wish Mindy was here with us.”
“I love you, too, Monty. And you know I wish that, too, with all my heart.” She patted my back. “Call me when you get home, okay? I’ll wait up.”
“I will. Good night, Nana.”
“Good night, Monty.”