9. Chapter Nine
Chapter Nine
Zahir
A laina and Keegan were adorable kids. Although Keegan was a teenager now and probably wouldn’t appreciate being called adorable . My favorite pictures were the ones of the kids and their dogs. The schnauzers had the perfect haircut and the two dogs along with their human companions were…adorable.
Andre’s face lit at every new shot, even as he munched on the cheese plate I’d prepared. And with gusto, we consumed the vegetables I’d cut.
Demetrius was loosening up a bit as well. The smiles came more easily—especially when he spoke of Jai or their children. Well, or the dogs. I’d never seen four happier humans and two happier dogs. Grins all around.
When we’d finished all the food and had basically run through Demetrius’s entire phone photo library, he offered a small smile.
“I would love for you to meet them. They’re your family.
We’re your family. Being together would mean a lot.
” At Andre’s obvious hesitation, he added, “We don’t have to tell them who you are. You can just be a friend.”
“Jai will ask a lot of questions.” Andre rubbed his hands up and down his jeans.
Slowly, Demetrius nodded. “Okay, he will. He’ll also accept when I say I can’t get into details.”
Andre shot me a look.
“Demetrius, when you’re next to Andre, the family resemblance is pretty darn clear. If not brothers, then first cousins. Absolutely no doubt in my mind—or anyone else’s who look closely.” He pivoted his attention to me. “And Jai knows about your text.” He gazed at Demetrius. “Or I assume—”
“Like I said, several of my friends were present. Including Lorcan. But he didn’t have a context for seeing you. I think if he’d known you were staying in Mission City with Zahir…well, maybe not.” Demetrius scratched his chin. “I don’t have an easy answer for this.”
“The truth is always a possibility.” I shrugged. “That is probably the most difficult path—but also the most honest. Less hurt feelings later—if the truth were to come out.”
“The truth always comes out.” Again, Demetrius scratched his chin. “As a parent, you learn this firsthand.”
I chuckled. “In a marriage as well. Marty always ferreted out the truth with me. And I did with him—but to a lesser extent.”
Andre cocked his head. “Why do you say that?”
“Because—” I shrugged. “I guess because I was more willing to let him get away with things. If he wanted me to think things were a certain way, then who was I to argue?”
“Even when you knew better?” He didn’t appear pleased.
“Especially when I knew better.” I sought the right words.
“I think Marty eventually figured it out. The only time I called him on his bullshit was with the cancer. I didn’t want us wasting precious time pretending he was going to be okay.
I wanted every moment to be dedicated to making his life the best it could be. ”
“And that meant truth?” Demetrius didn’t appear convinced.
“If we hadn’t acknowledged that truth, we might have frittered away what time we had left.
Honesty was necessary—even if that meant we both had to face his death.
I didn’t—” I swallowed. Hard. “—I didn’t want death to creep up on him and take him by surprise.
I wanted it to be as gentle as it could. Even as it was horrible.”
Demetrius blinked.
Is he thinking about Jai? How he’d cope if his husband passed first?
I don’t envy him that. It’s a horrible place to me.
Just as, Marty assured me, that leaving behind the love of his life—knowing I’d have to cope on my own—was breaking him.
But he thought I’d have our dog. Neither of us could’ve seen PJ dying a week later of a broken heart.
This time, I blinked. “He chose MAID and had a gentle passing. As I’d wanted for him.
I was with him and he didn’t suffer. That’s all anyone can ask for, I guess. ”
“I didn’t know you back then.” Demetrius offered a smile. “I wish I had. I wish I could’ve helped you through that. I hope you had someone.”
“Sure. Friends rallied.” And left about ten minutes after the funeral — but you don’t need to know that.
Andre frowned.
Oh shit, I told him the truth. Damn it.
But he apparently was going to keep my secret.
Demetrius turned to his younger brother. “What are you thinking?”
Andre’s gaze shot between me and his newly discovered family member.
Finally, he took a deep breath and let it out slowly.
“I suppose the answer’s yes. Yes, I want to meet your family.
Yes, it’s okay for you to tell them who I am.
Because, as Zahir says, we bear a striking resemblance, and I wouldn’t want the kids to find out later and think you deceived them intentionally. ”
“Kids are smart that way.” I offered a smile. Marty and I had never contemplated children—but I’d met a few over the years.
“Mine are.” Demetrius offered a sheepish smile. “Obviously I want to deflect and say they get that from their bio parents. Because, frankly, I’m humble.”
“You are that.” I smiled. Jai and Demetrius—and many of my new friends Quinton had introduced me to—were self-effacing and modest. They led unassuming lives and strove to be the best persons they could be—usually because they had kids or furbabies who needed them down-to-earth.
“Nurture is just as important as nature.” Andre sat a little taller. “Otherwise, I’d be destined to be the same fuck-up as our father. I don’t want that. I want to believe I can chart my own course that’s more influenced by my mother. And not just biology—but also the way she chose to raise me.”
I nodded. “That’s a great attitude. Just like I choose to stay away from the bigotry and homophobia of my parents.
Not just being gay, though. They were also disdainful of people of other races and religions.
They believe themselves superior. I hated that.
It didn’t suit my sensibilities to believe myself above others.
Being authentic to who I am is far more important than categorizing people. ”
“Yeah. I see that.” Andre scratched his chin.
Exactly the same way Demetrius did. And I could chalk it up to scratchy stubble—but, truthfully, even the way they curled their fingers was the same. “When do you think everyone can meet? And I’m happy to host here. ”
Demetrius shook his head. “I’d really like to show you my home. Jai has tomorrow night off. If Keegan wants to come home at the same time, that would be okay. If that works for you, of course.”
“It does.” Andre shifted his gaze to me. “You’ll be there, of course.”
“If you want me to be.” I tried to direct the response to both men, but my focus was, naturally, Andre. He appeared to need me, and so I’d be there for him in any capacity he saw fit.
“Feel free to bring Daphne.” Demetrius beamed.
Daphne, who’d been crestfallen when she’d followed me to the kitchen earlier and hadn’t received a treat, poked her head up from her bed. One of her many beds. Her ears twitched, she eyed the empty food plates, and then she laid her head back down.
“Daphne accepts the invitation.” I chuckled. “What can we bring?”
“I was thinking a barbecue. Is there anything you don’t eat?” Demetrius gazed between Andre and me.
“Not on my account. I eat just about everything.” I grinned. “And Jai’s barbecue chicken is delicious.”
“He’ll be happy to hear that. And you?” Demetrius cocked his head toward Andre.
“Like Zahir, I’ll eat just about everything. Well, except pineapple on pizza. That’s gross.”
I chuckled. A perfectly random thing to say. Weird, he chose that. “I’ll add that anchovies are pretty gross as well.”
Demetrius arched an eyebrow. “Well, more Hawaiian pizza for me, then.”
Andre’s eyes widened. “Seriously?”
“Yep.” A twinkle sparkled in Demetrius’s eyes.
“On that note—” I rose. “Maybe text us once you’ve confirmed a time?”
The brothers rose .
Demetrius nodded. “Yes, for sure. I—” He swallowed. “I’m so happy you decided to come west for a visit.”
Andre blinked a couple of times. But when Demetrius stepped closer, he stepped back.
Okay, so hugging is out for now. Maybe forever. Easy to respect that. I fervently hoped Demetrius would and, when he stepped toward the hall, my wish was granted.
“I’ll see you out.” I followed the man to the front hall and then out the door. We ambled to his car together. I glanced back, half expecting to see Andre in the doorway or at the front window, but I didn’t spot him anywhere.
Demetrius cleared his throat. “Is he really okay?”
Although I didn’t like the idea of talking about Andre behind his back, clearly Demetrius needed assurances only I could give.
“I’m not going to lie and say this has been easy for him—you can see that for yourself.
I will say it takes bravery to fly across the country to meet a total stranger.
Especially when rejection was a real possibility. ”
“I would never—”
“Yes, but he didn’t know that. He’d sent the text, but hadn’t found the courage to call. Jumping on a plane took guts. I want to say he’s strong, but at the same time, I’d say he’s vulnerable. As are you. This is tough for both of you.”
“We barely discussed our father.”
“He’s the initial tie that binds you—but it’s up to you to find more. To find common ground. To forge a path.” Again, I glanced back at the house. “You heard him—he’s been alone since his mother died. When he discovered he had family, that was a real shock.”
“Same here. I just knew my dad took off. I had Mom and Gran and a ton of responsibility. I didn’t really give the guy much thought. Was just grateful for the amazing women in my life. ”
“I would love to meet Imani and Malaya. They sound amazing.”
“If you can convince Andre to let them in as well, I’d appreciate it.”
“It’s not my place to convince. He needs gentle understanding—not pressure from me.”
“You’re right.” Demetrius winced. “I was wrong to ask.”