Chapter 32
~Riley~
In the seconds before Trevor and Hudson collide on the ice, everything seems to slow to a surreal crawl.
Hudson circles the rink the way he always does at the start of a warm-up, gliding with easy confidence, lifting one hand to the crowd as if he’s looking for someone.
Me, maybe? Heat floods my cheeks as the memories from last night flash through me; his mouth, his hands, the way my body shattered beneath him.
I pray my earmuffs hide my blush as I wave down at him.
Out of nowhere, Trevor appears.
He’s travelling full-speed, skating backward, his focus locked over his left shoulder while Hudson glides forward on his right. Hudson’s attention is still on the stands, completely unaware of the danger bearing down on him.
The scrape of blades on the ice reaches me, the low hum of the arena fading as my gaze flicks between the two men, their paths converging far too fast.
“Look out!” I shout, but the thin, panicked sound is swallowed up in the crowd’s general gasp as Trevor slams into Hudson’s back.
Hudson is knocked clean off his feet, skidding across the ice before coming to a brutal stop.
Trevor goes down too, landing hard on his side and sliding away in the opposite direction.
My heart stutters as both men lie motionless on the ice.
The crowd’s combined intake of breath swells into horrified murmurs as the boards swing open and the coaching teams flood the ice. Keaton skates over to Hudson, getting to him first, and when Hudson nods, I suck in a shallow, desperate breath.
What does that nod mean? Is he okay?
He has to be okay.
Hannah’s hand closes around mine, grounding and warm, though I don’t remember either of us reaching for the other. Maybe I grabbed her? I honestly don’t know.
Each second stretches into an eternity until Hudson finally moves, cautiously testing his limbs before allowing Keaton and the team doctor to help him to his feet. Relief crashes through me so hard my knees go weak.
He glances over his shoulder, and I follow his gaze to where Trevor is also standing now, shaken but upright.
They both look okay.
“Well, shit,” Hannah mutters, squeezing my hand again. “You don’t see that every day.”
“McDavis should be disqualified,” Lewis snaps from beside her, his tone sharp with anger on Hudson’s behalf. “That was bullshit.”
“I don’t think he did it on purpose,” I say automatically, but the words feel thin even as I speak them.
Did he? Because of me?
The thought claws at my chest, ugly and persistent. If Hudson’s hurt, I’ll never forgive myself.
But that would be insane, wouldn’t it? No one would risk their own competition that way.
Hannah and Lewis know Trevor and I broke up again. I told them last night at the club, and I told them how Trevor discovered Hudson in my bathroom and jumped to the wrong conclusion.
Except it’s not entirely wrong, since Hudson and I are together now, even if no one else knows it yet.
Lewis clearly suspects sabotage, but even if that’s true, it would be almost impossible to prove. I can’t imagine an event judge disqualifying Trevor without undeniable evidence.
After another flood, the men take to the rink again.
Even from several rows back, I can see the tension radiating off Hudson.
His shoulders are rigid, his movements sharp instead of fluid, and he keeps casting quick, wary glances across the ice toward Trevor, as if he doesn’t want to let him out of his sight.
When Hudson’s program begins and he triples his opening quad jump, my heart sinks.
The usual joy and lightness in his skating are nowhere to be seen. Although his technique is still clean, the spark that makes him Hudson just isn’t there. By the time he finishes and bends forward to catch his breath, hands braced on his thighs, his disappointment hits me like a punch to the gut.
It’s not the skate he wanted, not by any stretch of the imagination, and my lips tighten into a thin straight line as Hudson’s marks come up, putting him in last place. As Keaton gets into position to start his program, I get to my feet.
“Where are you going?” Hannah asks, her eyes darting from the ice up to me.
“I need to do something. I’ll catch up with you later.”
I know which room is Trevor’s, and I’m waiting outside the door when he returns, pacing the patterned carpet as my nerves buzz beneath my skin. True to form, he heads straight back after skating, phone in hand, still riding the adrenaline of competition.
His steps slow when he finally glances up from his phone and sees me standing there. “I didn’t do it on purpose,” he immediately blurts out.
I nod stiffly. Since I can’t prove it one way or the other, I’m not going to argue with him about it. That’s not why I’m here. “Can we talk?”
After a moment’s hesitation, he unlocks the door and steps aside. The moment I enter, the familiar scent of him brings back a dozen memories of other hotel rooms. There was a time, not that long ago, when being in a hotel room with him was all I needed. Now, it feels nostalgic in a bittersweet way.
Trevor throws off his winter jacket and strides over to the mini-fridge to grab a bottle of water. “I know I didn’t handle things well yesterday. Finding Baker in your room was a shock. I overreacted, but if we’re going to do this long-distance…”
I cut him off right there. “We’re not. I told you yesterday that it’s over, and I meant it. We’re done.”
His brows draw together in a puzzled look, like he can’t quite figure out what I mean. “Why are you here, then?”
“Because there’s something I need to know.” My heart thumps so loudly, I’m surprised he can’t hear it. “Why did you sleep with Evelyn?”
“I told you…”
“No, you didn’t,” I cut him off again, and his eyebrows lift in surprise.
The Riley he knew rarely interrupted him, let alone twice in one conversation.
“You said you were drunk, that you’ve never been attracted to her, and that it wasn’t about hurting me.
But none of those things explains why you did it. ”
“The reason doesn’t matter,” he tries again.
“It does to me,” I counter. “So, give me an answer, a real one, or I’ll…”
I grasp for leverage, something that will matter to him.
“I’ll call the club and ask to have the rest of this year’s fees refunded.”
That certainly does the trick. Trevor goes almost ghostly pale. “Please don’t do that, Riley. That’s not you.”
He’s right; it isn’t, but I don’t mind seeing him sweat a little. “I won’t if you tell me the truth.”
Swearing under his breath, he turns away from me. He forgets about the mirror on the hotel wall, though, and in its reflection, I see him scrub his face with one hand, psyching himself up for whatever he’s about to say.
When he turns back, his posture is resigned. “Evelyn approached me that night. She told me she knew a secret about me, and she said she’d tell everyone unless I had sex with her that night.”
It’s my turn to stare blankly at him as I try to make the words make sense in my head. “What secret?”
He grimaces. “Does it really matter now?”
“I think it does, yeah.”
If it was serious enough that he slept with her despite telling me he’d never been attracted to her, I want to know what it is.
Again, he runs his hand over his face, as if he could erase the whole thing from his memory. “She found out I’d been taking donations from supporters towards my skating fees.”
Those words don’t make sense either. “What do you mean? Your fees were already paid.”
“Exactly.” His grimace twists his handsome face into something almost cartoonish. “I was lying, Riley. I told people I needed the money for skating, but it wasn’t for that. I just needed more money.”
I still don’t understand. “For what?”
“For… anything! Everything.” He gestures at the room around us, his computer on the desk and his clothes hanging in the closet. “You don’t understand. Your mom pays for everything, you never have to even think about it.”
He’s right about that, but I never realized he saw it as such a big difference between us. “So, you only ever went out with me because of my mom’s money?”
“Fuck, no,” he insists. “Maybe it was part of why I was interested in you in the first place. Everyone said you were loaded. But when I got to know you, I fell in love with you, Riley. You have to know that.”
It’s certainly what it felt like to me. “So why not just ask me for more money if you needed it?”
“Because it’s embarrassing? Because I shouldn’t have to beg my girlfriend for spending money?” He shakes his head, eyes closing in a pained wince. “You don’t get it.”
I guess I don’t, but at least I’m finally starting to see the big picture. “So, Evelyn threatened to expose you, and you agreed to sleep with her.”
“It didn’t feel like much of a choice,” he grumbles. “I got very drunk, that part is true, just so I could go through with it. She promised she’d leave right after and you’d never know about it. I passed out, and the next thing I knew, it was morning, and you were there, and she was still there.”
Was that her plan, I wonder? Did she just want Trevor, or did she want me to find them?
“I never meant to hurt you,” he adds, his voice dropping to a tight whisper. “I’m sorry, Riley. I’m sorry I screwed things up for both of us.”
The strange thing is, with some time and distance between us, I’m not sure he did screw things up for me.
In the long run, he probably did me a favour.
I’m away from Evelyn, who was clearly never my friend, and I have a new club where I’m thriving.
I’m growing and learning new things about myself every day.
Most of all, I have an amazing new boyfriend who’s waiting to introduce me to his parents tonight.
“I won’t ask for a refund on this year’s fees,” I tell Trevor, because he’s right that the money really doesn’t matter to me. Now that I know what happened, I don’t feel the need to be vindictive. “You’ll have to make other arrangements for next year, though.”
His dark eyes search mine from across the room. “Is there anything I can do to convince you to give me another chance? I don’t even care about the money.”
Now he doesn’t care. Now, when it’s too late.
“I’m afraid not.” I turn towards the door before looking back over my shoulder. “Be more careful on the ice.”
With nothing left to say, I let myself out.