7. Alessia
Imunch on the sandwich I brought for our picnic in relative silence, watching Aurelio carefully. He’s been acting weird this entire time. I’d say he’s twitchy, but that doesn’t quite explain it properly. It’s more like he’s…I don’t know, sappy? Anxious? Suave? It’s somewhere in there.
Whatever it is, it’s annoying. Extremely annoying.
First, he has the audacity to patronize me for my upbringing. Then he wraps his arm around me and holds me there. And now, he’s giving me gifts, giving me more than half the food, and standing to block the bright sunlight so I don’t have to squint.
Who is this guy, and what has he done with Aurelio?
This isn’t something I’d planned for. By now, I’d hoped to have him wrapped around my little finger, ready to obey my every command. Instead, I’ve beaten him in swordplay, but lost to him in the mind game. He’s free to taunt me and tear me down as he pleases, just to make himself feel better. Now, he’s also free to romance me, or whatever this is.
I don’t like it. I prefer bickering. I’m used to that.
But I have to admit, being treated like a princess without the stress of actual royal duties…it’s kind of awesome.
Aurelio shoots me a soft smile, sending butterflies cascading through my middle. It’s like he’s reading my mind. Determinedly tearing my eyes away from that perfect face and swoon-worthy smile, I finish eating my sandwich in silence, letting the warmth of the last light of day soak into my back. It’s finally the perfect temperature out here on the windy rolling hills of Celestia.
When I finish my sandwich, I can barely set down my wrapper before Aurelio scoops it up and places it in the tiny basket I brought with me. This simultaneously has me blushing like a schoolgirl and prickling with irritation. It’s so confusing, the way he makes me feel. I want to scream.
Turning away from him, I walk over to his horse, hoping to distract myself by forcing interaction with this terrifying beast. I’m not a fan of animals bigger than I am, so even approaching Cricket has my heart pounding. Yeah, I’ve ridden on her back all this way, but that doesn’t establish much trust with me. Trust is gained in droplets and lost in buckets with royalty.
My whole body is tenser than a taut rope as I reach out to touch her mane, the same way I saw Aurelio touch her earlier. I squeeze my eyes shut just before my fingers can brush her mane.
To my surprise, nothing happens.
I open my eyes, feeling the coarse hair beneath my fingers. Cricket hasn’t even bothered to turn and look at me. She didn’t twitch when I touched her. I take a deep breath, then run my fingers through her mane. I find a tangle in her hair, so I move my hand to pet her shoulder instead. Still, there’s no reaction, but I’m suspicious now. I feel like I’m walking on the thinnest ice the world has ever seen.
Cricket snorts, and I nearly jump out of my skin.
“AHH!”
I jolt so hard, I lose my balance and fall straight on my ass with a painful thud. Cricket swishes her tail just as poorly covered snickers sound behind me. I turn to shoot a glare at Aurelio.
“Stop that! I’m trying to conquer a lifelong fear!” I snap.
“There’s no reason to be afraid of her. Cricket would never hurt a fly,” Aurelio says.
He walks over to his horse, spreads his arms wide, and hugs her from the side of her neck. She simply snorts half-heartedly, flicks her ears, and goes back to grazing. I stare at Aurelio with wide eyes.
“Are you crazy?” I question.
“Probably a little. But not when it comes to horses.” He gestures for me to join him. “Come on, you can hug her, too.”
“Um, no thank you. I don’t know how you can do that without fearing for your life. I’ve seen people trampled by these beasts.”
“Excuse you! Cricket is not a beast!” Aurelio scoffs, feigning hurt like I’ve punched him in the chest. “She is the sweetest, most gentle being on the planet, and most horses are even gentler than her!”
“They kick people hard enough to kill them,” I say, deadpanning.
“So? People can punch hard enough to kill one another, but we don’t go around committing murders just because we can. It takes a lot of stupid to get a horse to kick you.”
My stomach churns uneasily, but I finally take the leap of faith and join Aurelio at Cricket’s side. He detaches himself from her side, patting her shoulder where he’d just been.
“Come on, you can do it. Give Cricket a hug. It’ll make you feel better.”
“Why are you trying to make me feel better, exactly?”
Aurelio shrugs. “You seem uptight. Horses are wonderful de-stressors.”
I refrain from punishing him for the nonchalant insult, instead going right in for the hug. I wrap my arms around Cricket’s side, leaning my head against her neck. I hold my breath, prepared to jump away at a moment’s notice.
But unexpectedly, I feel myself relax. I sink into her side as I listen to her heartbeat, strong and steady beneath her skin. I can feel every one of her muscles tighten and relax as she shifts her weight. She’s warm, too, like a heat charm, but not so hot that it’s overwhelming. A small smile works itself across my face.
“Okay, maybe this isn’t so bad. But she’s still terrifying.”
“Well, you’d be the first to be scared of her. She’s kind of a big baby,” Aurelio laughs, patting Cricket’s side.
I pause, feeling another surge of bravery. I reach out to touch Cricket’s nose, but I freeze halfway, a jolt of fear rooting me in place. Terror locks up my limbs until I can’t move. Cricket turns her head ever so slightly to look at me, and it’s game over. My courage is gone. I’m stuck.
“I’ve got you,” Aurelio says.
Without warning, he gently takes my hand in his own and guides it to Cricket’s nose. My eyes widen as I feel how soft the hair is here in her face. Cricket blinks at me, almost appearing confused, then slowly moves her head to rub it on my shoulder. I suppress a surprised shriek and hold my breath until she moves her head away.
“That—was—terrifying!” I squeak.
“Alessia, you confuse me,” Aurelio chuckles quietly. “How can you be fearless when facing grown men in swordplay and leading an entire country, but more terrified than a toddler standing beside a horse?”
I freeze once again, but this time, it’s not because Cricket’s scaring me. This time, I’m stunned into stillness by the sound of Aurelio’s soft baritone in my ear. His hand is still on mine, and my back is pressed against his chest. I felt his chuckle vibrate against my shoulders. The heat from his body is making me dizzy. It scrambles the words in my head until forming coherent sentences requires concentrated effort.
“I…I’m not terrified. I don’t know what you’re talking about,” I stammer.
“It’s okay. You don’t have to be afraid of things you don’t understand,” Aurelio whispers.
There’s that deep baritone again. It sends a shiver down my spine. I’m suddenly feeling very weak at the knees. If I don’t stop this soon, this runaway train of strange, new sensations is going to derail, and I have no idea where it’s headed.
“Aurelio. You’re too close,” I say.
“Your voice trembled when you said that,” he breathes.
Damn it.Clearing my throat, I try once more to steady my voice when I demand, “Move away. Now.”
Aurelio does, in fact, move away—just not to where I expected him to. Instead of walking away, he steps in front of me, holding my hands at arm’s length, just far enough to be comfortable, but close enough to capture all my attention. In the rapidly fading light, a soft gold halo surrounds his frame, making him even more impossibly attractive. I gulp.
“Aurelio…what are you doing?”
“Testing a theory. Tell me to stop if you don’t want this.”
His eyes dart to my lips, then back to my eyes. It’s an obvious question. My heart beats faster than is probably healthy. My gaze darts to his lips, then back up to his eyes, which contain the same question as before. He’s not moving until I give him permission.
What should I do?!
Sweat trickles down the back of my neck. Is it just me, or did the temperature rise again? I’m overheating as my brain short circuits from the pressure. I want to kiss him, but I don’t want him to touch me at all; I want to know him, but I want nothing to do with him; I want to train with him, but I want to kick his butt over and over again. I can’t seem to make up my mind. The choice feels impossible.
But…is it really impossible? We’re married, after all. What’s the harm in kissing my own husband?
My head is screaming at me to turn and run.
My heart is speaking something a little louder, and far more compelling.
I give him a slight nod, and before I know it, he’s closed the distance between us. His lips brush softly against mine. Sensations I never knew existed cascade through my body. Something like electricity zips through me, from my chest all the way through my middle. I instinctively wrap my arms around him, pulling him in closer until our chests are touching. I feel his heart beating as rapidly as mine in there.
Is he nervous, too? He’s not showing it.
I’m not sure why I had this sudden change of heart. I’m sure Aurelio is wondering the same thing. It feels as though there’s a magnet between us, dragging us closer whenever we try to run away. I wonder if a celestial has it out for us, or if this is some trick of my bloodline, my imperial human instincts showing their true colors.
But deep down, I know this is me, and only me, discovering what flirting, affection, attraction, and rejection are for the very first time.
And it’s exhilarating.
Aurelio breaks the kiss after a few moments, stepping back to look at me with shining eyes.
“So, I was right.”
“About what?”
Aurelio smiles. “Nothing important. Come on,” he says, taking my hand. “We have to get going, or it’ll get dark before we return.”
I’d be lying if I said I didn’t swoon a little as he lifted me up and put me on the saddle himself. This runaway train has derailed much faster than anticipated, but for once, I don’t mind giving up control. I’m curious to see where this goes.