Chapter 35 Guess Who
GUESS WHO
She gets away with everything. She gets to have everything.
That’s what I keep coming back to. Not just him.
Not what he does for her or how he looks at her or the way his whole body shifts when she’s in the room.
All of that burns, yes. But what really eats at me is her.
Just her. The way she moves through the world collecting things she doesn’t deserve and never paying for any of it.
She walked away from a marriage and nobody came for her. She rebuilt her life and nobody questioned how. She carries weapons and secrets and a past that would bury most people and somehow she’s still standing. Still breathing. Still taking up space that should be mine.
I’ve watched her go to school and come home and go to work and come home and live this little life she’s built for herself and all I can think is how unfair it is.
How she gets to start over and I don’t. How she gets to be loved and I don’t.
How she gets to walk into rooms full of people who care about her while I sit in the dark and count the ways she’s stolen from me.
And she doesn’t even know I exist. Not really. Not in the way that matters. She has no idea that someone is keeping score. That every good thing that happens to her is a debt she owes me. That every smile on her face is borrowed time.
People think jealousy is about wanting what someone else has. It’s not. Jealousy is about knowing you deserved it first and watching someone else live the life that was supposed to be yours.
She gets away with everything. But not forever. Nobody’s luck lasts forever.
And I’m very, very patient.