30. XANDER
Chapter 30
XANDER
T he car spun out of control. I tried to take charge of the wheel, but I was going too fast. I was headed straight for the wall.
“Nooo!” I yelled. I heard the screeching of the tires, followed by a loud crash. I felt the sharp pains shoot up my arms and legs, the agonizing sensations of the impact engulfing my body. The sickening sound of scraping metal echoed in my ears.
I woke with a start, my heart racing, sweat clinging to my skin. The vivid images of the accident replayed in my mind. It felt so real like I was reliving the crash over and over again.
I glanced around the hospital room, the beeping machines and sterile smell confirming that I was safe, that it was just a nightmare. But the memory of the accident lingered, the fear and pain still fresh in my mind.
I knew I was lucky to be alive, but the thought of not being able to race again filled me with anguish.
Then my eyes settled on the blurry image of a fifty-something woman talking to a doctor. “Mom,” I tried to call out, but my voice was barely a whisper.
Nevertheless, she heard me and turned around. She immediately rushed to me, hugging me and crying. “Oh, thank God you’re awake now…”
“It’s okay, Mom. Don’t cry. I’ll be fine.”
She kept on sobbing while I was the one who tried to console her. “I’m sorry, Mom. I wasn’t in my right mind. I sped up too much…”
“Sshhh…” she whispered. “It’s okay. I love you, my son. I’m just so glad you’re alive.”
Eventually, my mother settled down. The doctor came to check on me and to explain my situation. He assured me that with therapy and a full recovery, there was a good chance I could race again after several months. It would depend on how fast my injuries would heal and recover.
“Thank you, Doctor,” I said, feeling relieved.
Just then, my dad stepped into the room. He and Mom exchanged awkward glances.
“Hello,” Dad said to her. She nodded in response. At least they were being civil to each other. It was more than I could ask for.
He then turned to me. “Thank God you’ve woken up. You got us so worried.” He squeezed my hand and rubbed my shoulder. “How are you holding up?”
“Very sore,” I said, managing a weak smile.
“What happened out there, Xander?” Dad asked quietly, knowing that something had been amiss. “It’s not like you to drive into a wall like that.”
“I know. I’m sorry.” That was all I could say at the moment, but he knew I must have been troubled enough for that to happen.
“Don’t let it happen again, please. Whatever you’re going through, we’re here for you, Xander. So many people care about you.”
But where’s Lyca? I couldn’t help asking silently in my mind. I wasn’t sure if she’d heard about my accident. But maybe she just couldn’t care less, I thought bitterly.
Later on, Mom went out for a while to grab something to eat. I was the one who kept on insisting because I knew she wouldn’t leave my side if I didn’t. The timing was fortuitous; just a few minutes later, Barbara Steele and her daughter Julia arrived.
Barbara's usual composed demeanor seemed softened, her eyes reflecting genuine concern. Julia, always the more empathetic of the two, approached me with a gentle smile.
“Hey, Xander,” Julia said softly, giving me a quick hug. “I'm really sorry about what happened. I hope you get well soon.”
“Thanks, Julia,” I replied, touched by her gesture.
Barbara stood by the door, watching us quietly. After a moment, she spoke. “Xander, we've been thinking... Since you'll need some help during your recovery, why don't you come stay with us for a while? Our house is more spacious, and we can make sure you have everything you need.”
I was taken aback by her offer. It was the first time she had shown genuine concern for me. Dad smiled at her, his expression reflecting gratitude and joy.
“Thank you,” I said, thankful as well. “I’ll surely consider it.” Perhaps it was only because of the accident, and she probably felt sorry for me or guilty about how she’d been treating me. But whatever it was, still this was a step toward something good.
Dad and his family left before Mom arrived back. I was glad because that would have been too awkward and stressful for everyone. I really hoped Lyca would come. I was pretty sure she and Mom would get along well.
Some racers from the team came in the evening.
John was the first to drop a remark. With a grin, he said, “You always said you wanted to be in the fast lane, but this is taking it a bit far, don't you think? Besides, the ladies won’t appreciate an injured racer!”
We all laughed. “Thanks for coming, guys,” I said.
“Of course! What are teammates and friends for, right?” Drake uttered.
“Now we can finally pick a new star racer!” Andrew joked.
“And a new manager too!” John added.
It was great to have them visit me, to enjoy the playful and teasing banter. I got distracted from the physical pain, and from the increasing pain that stemmed from my recent heartbreak.
That night, as I lay in bed by myself, I thought about becoming a father to Arianne’s baby. It scared the hell out of me, much more than this accident. Absentmindedly, I scrolled through my social media news feeds. Just as I was getting sleepy, something caught my eye.
As I read Arianne's post, relief flooded through me. The photo showed her with a man named Eric, her hand resting on a small baby bump. I read the words over and over, trying to comprehend it all. How could I have been so mistaken?
Just as I was processing this revelation, a message from Arianne appeared on my phone. I hesitated before opening it, unsure of what to expect.
I’m so sorry I lied to you, Xander. I don’t know what came over me. But if you’ve seen my online post just now, you know that Eric is the father of my baby, not you. I’m so sorry.
The weight that had been pressing down on me lifted slightly, and I felt grateful that the truth had finally come out. My relationship with Arianne had been nothing more than a brief affair. Now I could freely pursue Lyca.
I just hoped against hope that she would give me another chance.