Chapter 35
Chapter Thirty-Five
Luna
I’ve never been more humiliated in my entire life.
And I don’t know if Elliott knocking that idiot on his ass made it better or worse.
He apologized profusely, and I’m not mad at him, but it still hurt. I’ve worked so hard on my self-esteem and all it takes is one jerk to say something unkind for it to send me spiraling.
We know who the heavyweight is in your house? Am I right?
Even now that we’re back at the hotel, heat floods my face every time I think about it. Or see the clip online. It’s gone viral. And of course, the media has now gone crazy trying to figure out who I am.
That is an unexpected result of the situation.
The general public won’t recognize me.
I was a hacker, not some sort of celebrity, and my identity was well hidden until the FBI got involved. Even then, the people who arrested me may not recognize me now with my pink or purple hair and the contact lenses that replaced my glasses.
“Honey, are you all right?” Rage is watching me intently as I scroll on my phone.
“The entire world now has my picture along with a video clip of Bronco calling me a heavyweight—so no, I’m not all right.”
“What can I do?”
“Just focus on getting ready for the fight. There’s nothing to be done.”
“Then why are you so stressed?”
I turn to look at him, squinting. Typically, he’s not one of those men who’s dense. In fact, he’s the opposite ninety-nine out of one hundred times. Unfortunately, he chose this time to be oblivious.
“You do understand that my face is everywhere, right?”
“Yeah.” He turns to me. “But this will pass. I mean, it’s the fighting world and after tonight, we’re not going to be a part of it.”
“No, but it’s not like my face is just going to disappear.”
“Okay.”
I throw up my hands in frustration. “Elliott. I’m in witness protection. I’m not supposed to be drawing media attention to myself!”
He frowns. “Yeah, but your situation is a little different. You weren’t some accountant for the mob, where people knew you personally and would recognize you. I mean, you worked mostly on the dark web.”
“Mostly, but not completely. And some of the people on that list were high-ranking officials in the government—they could know what I look like. And potentially where I am.”
“But what do they care? The FBI killed the list so at this point it’s moot.”
“To a degree. The thing is, they don’t know how much I know. The fact that I had a copy of the client list for the Assault Academy is the reason I had to go into witness protection. The people on that list wanted me dead. Possibly still do.”
“Still?” Rage asks in confusion. “As much as I don’t want to think about something like this, the FBI could have had you killed immediately.
You wouldn’t have made it into witness protection.
You mentioned some very powerful people.
And back then, you were a lot more vulnerable than you are now.
At this point, don’t you think they’ve moved on?
After all this time, you think they’ll recognize you from some crappy pictures of you at the weigh-in with a jerk like Bronco calling you names? ”
“I don’t know, but—”
“Honey.” He puts both hands on my shoulders.
“I’m not minimizing what you went through, but that’s not your reality anymore.
It’s been seven years. As shitty as it is, the whole Assault Academy story died a quick, painless death.
At this point, I have a hard time believing any of them are actively looking for you.
And Daniil wouldn’t bring you into the fold if he truly believed you were in danger. ”
I stare at him for a second, trying to wrap my hand around his casual dismissiveness.
“Ever since we started trying for a baby,” he continues, “you’ve started worrying about every little thing.
The stuff you thought was happening at your apartment, even though the security footage shows it wasn’t.
This whole thing with Garth and Candy. It’s like you’re trying to distract yourself from the issues around getting pregnant by either inventing issues elsewhere or inserting yourself in other people’s drama.
If you take a step back, I think you’ll see that I’m right. ”
I blink, equal parts heartbroken and furious that he would say what he just said. Like I’m just some hormonal, emotional woman, instead of a trusted colleague who’s as skilled as he is, just in a different way. We’re equals professionally, yet he’s treating me like I’m a fucking idiot.
And the worst part is—I can’t even argue with him because I haven’t heard from Jonas yet.
Well, I heard from him, but he said it was taking longer than usual because he found something but he hasn’t been able to figure out if the missing time is merely a glitch or if someone actually hacked my security cameras and altered the feed.
“You’re mad,” he says quietly, watching my face.
“I’m disappointed,” I reply honestly.
He sighs, shaking his head a little. “If it were any other day, we could sit down and talk this out, but I can’t today, princess. I’m sorry. I need to be focused on the fight. Can we please talk about this in the morning? Or even tonight?”
“That’s probably a good idea.” I turn and walk into the bathroom, press my back against the door, and close my eyes.
He’s being such a stereotypical man at the moment, and it’s extra hurtful because up until now, he’s been the opposite.
He’s thoughtful. Insightful. He listens.
He seems to care about me. And yet, when it comes to something this important, he’s letting me down.
I understand that he’s distracted, and I certainly don’t want him to get hurt tonight because he’s thinking about me, but the dismissiveness is mind-boggling.
I’m grateful my phone is in my pocket because I desperately need someone to talk me off the ledge.
So, I text Allora. She’s in Atlanta working, and maybe she can offer perspective.
Not on this exact situation, since I don’t know how much she knows, but at least with Rage and me having our first…
fight? Disagreement? Ugh. I don’t even know what to say.
LUNA: Hey, it’s me. Elliott and I just had our first disagreement and I’m hiding in the bathroom. What do you do when you and Landon argue?
ALLORA: Hey! I don’t mean to make things worse, but Landon and I don’t really fight.
The last time we argued was right before I was kidnapped the second time, and we both thought that the last time we potentially saw each other we were fighting…
so we vowed not to. I’m sure it will happen at some point, but for now, we don’t argue.
LUNA: Okay, that’s annoying as hell. LOL
ALLORA: Part of it is because I was kidnapped, tortured, and raped. Sometimes I feel like he uses kid gloves with me, and while I appreciate it, we’re actually dealing with that in therapy. It’s just not sustainable long-term.
LUNA: I guess that’s fair. You went through something unimaginable so I can see how he wouldn’t want to upset you—ever. But you’re right, that isn’t sustainable.
ALLORA: So, tell me what you fought about. Maybe I can offer outside perspective?
I sigh.
This is so hard.
Before coming on at Shadow Security, I didn’t care about keeping secrets because I didn’t care enough about anyone to want to tell them. It’s different now, especially with Allora.
LUNA: Someday, I’ll have to tell you more about my past. But that’s way too much for a text while I’m hiding in the bathroom.
ALLORA: Is this about the video from weigh in?
LUNA: You saw it?
ALLORA: Yes. I mean, your head is down, so there isn’t really a great shot of your face, but they catch a glimpse of you as you’re leaving.
LUNA: Great. Well, the long and short of it is that I’m afraid someone from my past as a hacker may find me because of that video and Elliott basically said I’m hormonal and trying to deflect my concerns about my infertility by pretending bad things are happening in other aspects of my life.
ALLORA: He SAID that?
LUNA: More or less.
ALLORA: That doesn’t sound like him at all.
LUNA: I know. And here’s the thing—I asked Daniil to help me figure out one way or another if I’m imagining things or if there really is a threat.
I’m waiting for him to get back to me. In the meantime, I’m upset that Elliott dismissed me so easily.
You think it’s just because the fight is in a couple of hours? Or is this the real Elliott?
ALLORA: I can’t speak of him as a boyfriend, but I’ve never seen him be dismissive of anyone. He might think it, but he’s more the type to not say anything at all rather than say something hurtful.
LUNA: Well, he didn’t hesitate to hurt me today.
ALLORA: My advice is this: He’s about to fight in public for the first time in like, five years. Let this go until after the fight. Then you sit him down and tell him exactly how he hurt you.
LUNA: I know you’re right.
ALLORA: He’s not perfect, not by a long shot, but he and Landon are two of the best men I’ve ever known. Strong, capable and loyal to a fault. I mean, he knocked the snot out of that Bronco asshole for what he said.
I manage a wry smile even though she can’t see it.
LUNA: That he did.
ALLORA: He loves you, Luna. It’s going to be okay.
LUNA: He’s never said those words, though.
ALLORA: It doesn’t matter. Actions speak louder than words—and I’m talking about both how he treats you AND the stupid thing he said when you argued.
LUNA: Thanks for listening.
ALLORA: Text me during the fight—we can ‘watch’ it together. I’ll have it on here.
LUNA: Will do. Talk later.
ALLORA: Chin up—everything is going to be okay.
I don’t feel nearly as hopeful as she does.