Chapter 23
Chapter Twenty-Three
Eleven Years Before
Raine
M J’s Diner is the popular hangout spot in Covewood, Kentucky. It sits on the very edge of downtown, across from the building where the farmer’s market is held during the spring season until the end of fall. The diner was opened in the late fifties by the Loveitt family.
The fact that the original owner named the diner after his wife gives the place a romantic feel. That and their last name literally has the word love in it. It’s a no brainer.
It’s decorated in warm colors that create a cozy atmosphere, and the walls are covered with photographs of the original owners and their family over the years. Each day, I see couple after couple snuggling close in the booths, sneaking kisses when they think no one is looking, sharing food, and causing my coworker, Stefanie, to gag.
“I don’t know why I choose to work here and torture myself,” she snarls from behind the register, straightening the bills in the drawer, and rolls her baby blues.
“Because you're part of the Loveitt family, so naturally it’s tradition that you work here. ”
Stefanie Loveitt is a few years older than me and went through a bad breakup a few months ago. The idea of being in love is repulsive to her. So anytime Ryland enters the diner to visit me, I tell him to keep the affection to a minimum—only when she’s around, of course. Every night when I end my shift, Ryland and I have been sneaking an hour or two together before I have to go back home.
I stretch the truth, you could say, and tell Mom and Davis that I’m working longer shifts. Davis hovers over everything that I do, making sure Ryland and I don’t get to see each other throughout the week. What they don’t know won’t hurt them. Ryland and I spend our evenings hanging out at the diner, walking the streets of downtown, catching a movie at the theater across the street, or we sit in the car and talk.
“Quit being such a Debbie Downer, Stef. You know working with me is the highlight of your day.” I bump my hip into hers.
“That and the tips. I can’t complain about the tips.”
“Agreed.” I’ve been saving every tip that I can since Davis knows nothing about them.
As she continues organizing the cash register, I scan the diner to make sure everyone looks accounted for. That’s when I notice an extra person sitting in my section. Panic squeezes my throat as soon as I recognize who it is. Matt, one of Davis’ gophers, is watching me with his dark eyes, his lips turning into an evil smirk as soon as he notices me looking his way.
I turn and rush into the kitchen, allowing the swinging door to hit my backside and push me forward a few steps. Carl, the cook, looks over at me and raises his bushy eyebrows.
“Everything okay?”
“Uh…yeah. I just—” Just what, Raine ? No need to panic here. Matt lives in Covewood, and there aren’t many restaurant options to choose from. He’s probably just here to eat. Not to spy on you. Surely Davis wouldn’t send Matt here to spy on me? To make sure that I’m at the diner? Well, I’m here, so maybe it’s a good thing Matt has seen me working.
Unless …
Unless Davis has caught on to my lies.
“Hey, there is a—” Stefanie says from behind me. I whip around, eyes wide with fear, and face her. “You’re looking pale. Are you feeling alright?”
“Stefanie, would you do me a huge favor and take over the table in the back corner? Please, I’m begging you. I’ll do anything you want.” I beg her, the words escaping me so fast.
Stefanie watches me for a moment, hesitating at first, and nods her head and slips out of the kitchen. I take a moment to breathe in deep breaths, attempting to calm my heart, which is currently trying to escape my chest cavity.
A few minutes later, Stefanie is walking through swinging doors with an order to give to Carl. “Okay, since I’m waiting on the creep, could you grab the family that just came in?”
“Yes, absolutely. Thank you.”
“You’ll explain this to me later?” she asks, pointing a finger at me with a determined look in her eyes.
“Yeah, sure.”
And I do. I haven’t told Stefanie anything about my home life but as soon as Matt leaves the diner, I fill her in on everything. She stays quiet as she listens, her eyes growing wide occasionally, pity overtaking her face.
“I’ll never complain to you again,” she finally says, wiping down the last table as we prepare for the nightshift to take over. “I’m sorry you have to deal with that.”
I shrug my shoulders. “It is what it is. Only a year left, and I can get the heck out of here.”
Once our shift is over, Stefanie and I part ways, and I rush toward my car when I see Ryland waiting for me. He’s leaning against the passenger side door, legs crossed, and arms open. I crash into him, wrapping him into a hug, inhaling his comforting scent .
“Wow, now that’s a hug. I missed you too.” His hands slide up my back, over my shoulders, until they land on the sides of my face.
A shiver runs through me, as it always does when I feel his touch. He pulls my face away from his chest until I can meet his gaze. I can’t hide how happy he makes me feel. Why would I ever want to?
My smile falters at the memory of Matt watching me at the diner. Ryland, always attuned, senses the change in me. His eyes search my face for a moment before he asks, “What is it?”
I take a step back and look around us for any sign of being watched. He does the same, even though he has no idea why. Once I feel secure, I step back into him.
“I saw one of Davis’ friends at the diner tonight. The same one that was with Davis that night.” I don’t have to explain which night I’m referring to, because I can see the memory written on Ryland’s snarl. “I had Stefanie cover the table for me, so I didn’t talk to him. I could have been overreacting, and he was just there to eat.”
“Or Davis sent him there to check up on you.”
Ryland looks around us again, his body tense with alertness. I don’t understand how Davis can be okay, knowing how he has emotionally damaged the people around him. It makes me sick. I’ll never understand what drew my mother to him in the first place.
“I don’t think he’s here anymore,” I say, trying my best to brush off the sudden chill I feel, even though it’s the beginning of summer and I can feel the sticky heat clinging to the night.
Ryland returns his eyes to me, flickering down to the rainbow necklace dangling from my neck that I never take off, and a hint of a grin shows on his lips. He places his fingers on the pendant and tugs lightly on it until I follow his lead. I lean up onto my tippy toes and touch the edge of our noses together.
I kiss the curve of his smile, and the simple touch makes me feel like I’m floating. Like I’m in the middle of the lake, drifting in the water and staring up at the sunbeams dancing through the trees. Ryland has always had that effect on me, even before we started dating.
I let my lips leave his to start trailing along the sharp line of his jaw until they land on his chin. Exhaling all the tension in my body, I nuzzle into his chest and wrap both my arms around him. “I love you.” The words slip from my lips, like it’s the easiest thing I’ve ever said.
“I love you too.” His words sink into my skin in a rough whisper. He leaves a small kiss on my collarbone before releasing a sigh that loosens his chest. He takes two steps back and begins leading us into a walk.
We follow the sidewalk that takes us toward the center of downtown where a large fountain sits, spraying water into the night sky. The sun has officially crested over the distant mountains, the purple and blue hues of sunset bleeding into vibrant orange. We stay silent, the only sound coming from our footsteps, echoing off the buildings around us. Ryland keeps an arm tightly around my shoulder and his head leaning against mine as we take in the scenery.
My mind is consumed by Ryland, even with him right next to me. All I can think about is how much I love being with him. How much I love our talks. How he looks like pure sunshine when he smiles. How hearing his laugh feels like a cozy blanket. I often daydream about us, pieces of our conversations replaying in my mind, giggling at something funny he said or did. I can close my eyes and see every feature of his face perfectly because I’ve memorized the details of him, especially the way he looks at me before he kisses me.
I catch myself smiling and wondering when the next time will be that I’ll see him again. Even though we never know what the future will hold, I do know one thing for sure: that Ryland is the best thing that has ever happened to me, and I never want to let go of what we have together. It's as if God created the two of us perfectly for one another .
Downtown Covewood is small, and I wish there was more to do. A handful of lawyers' offices sit amongst the different buildings along with a few banks, one barbershop, the movie theater, and a tacky gift shop. The scene isn’t romantic at all. If anything, it feels stale, and I’m ready to turn around and suggest we do something else.
“I’m so ready to get out of this boring town,” I admit.
Ryland removes his arm to slip his hand into mine. He gives me a little squeeze and looks down at me. “One more year and we graduate high school.”
“Does it bother you to think that you could’ve graduated already?” I ask, remembering when he first moved to Covewood, and that his mom thought it would be best to hold him back a year because of how poorly he did the previous year at his old school.
“Nope. Because I get to graduate with you. Plus, I would be here waiting for you anyway,” he answers, bending down until he plants a kiss onto my temple.
“Are you sure about that?” I tease, elbowing him gently in the ribs, loving the sound of his laugh.
Ryland’s eyes twinkle with mischief. His playfulness has always been infectious. I bite the inside of my cheek to try to keep from laughing as he tugs my hand, leading me down a small alleyway, until we’re hidden between the shadows. He walks toward me until my back touches the scratchy brick wall, arches an eyebrow, and asks, “This okay?”
At my nod, his fingers curl around the swell of my hip, gently pulling me closer, and his other hand finds mine. I feel like I can't breathe, in the best possible way. I’m frozen and waiting for his next move.
“There’s no way I could ever leave you, and you’re the only reason I’ll ever need to stay. I’m not going anywhere unless it’s by your side.” His words calm the storm inside me.
Ryland has never given me a reason to doubt us, but his reassurance means more to me than he’ll ever know. I reach up and run my fingers through his hair and tug him until our lips are against each other. It’s my silent way of promising him that I will never leave him.
His lips part, and I stifle a groan when his tongue trails across the seam of my mouth, parting it. The first taste of him is always sweet, like the whipped cream on top of a hot fudge sundae. I want to tilt his face for a better angle, but I let him lead.
He’s the first one to pull back, panting, and places his forehead on mine. I can feel the magnetic pull between us. This heated need for one another, to keep kissing, to want more from each other. However, we’ve done a good job at knowing when to pull back and not rush into things.
Ryland clears his throat, inhaling a deep breath, and takes a few steps away from me. I hate the distance between us, but I know it’s necessary. I give him a shy smile and motion for us to continue walking back to our vehicles.
“So, now that it’s officially summer break, are you staying with your grandparents?” he asks, the question catching me off guard.
Every summer vacation I spend with my grandparents. However, this will be the first summer Davis has lived with Mom. I predict that he’ll want to control the situation, especially since he’s been making me pay him rent. If I’m not at the house, I won’t have to pay him rent, and I know that will be an issue with him.
“Who knows what Davis will allow,” I say, and the worry quickly overwhelms me, as if it’s about to swallow me whole.
“He can’t keep you from staying with them during the summer. You’ve always spent the summers at the farm.” Ryland’s face pinches, a look of displeasure crossing his features before disappearing.
“I know, but he’s been relying on my rent money. I’m surprised he even listened to my Mom’s request of letting me keep half my paycheck. What teenager has to pay rent to live in their own home?”
“He’d probably make Luke do the same if he was still coming around,” he adds, and I hum in agreement. Luke was lucky to get away when he did. He’s blessed with a mother who knows when not to take Davis’ crap. My mother, on the other hand, bends in fear.
“Like you said, one more year and we can get out of here.” That statement alone is all the hope that I need.
“Where am I taking you?” he asks.
We’ve had a few discussions of what colleges we want to apply to and agreed to pick one together. He’s been saving every dime he can and has been working extra lately to help his Pops keep his business afloat, which has been slowly falling apart since Nan passed away. I’ve tried to not allow that to worry me.
I’ve been saving everything I get from my paychecks too. Surely, between the two of us, we will have enough to help us move away from here. As we walk back toward our cars, we discuss our plans more, and the excitement of the future builds inside my chest. That excitement is ripped away at the sight of a dark form standing in front of my car. He takes a step forward into the light casting down from the pole in front of the parking lot. Matt smirks at us, clearly pleased to have caught us together.
“What are you doing here?” Ryland growls, moving me behind him, as if he has to shield me from Matt.
“Just taking a nightly stroll,” he says, his voice slithering with each word.
“It’s not a crime for me to take a walk downtown after my shift. Davis doesn’t have to send you here to spy on me.” I roll my eyes, anger lighting up every nerve in my body, and I move around my car until I’m standing by my driver's side door. Ryland never leaves my side or takes his hand off me. His eyes watch Matt’s every movement like a lion ready to pounce.
“No, but he’s not happy that every night after your shift you’ve been spending time with him . ”
Ryland tenses beside me. “Raine is allowed to do whatever she wants.”
“See, that’s where you’re confused, because Davis specifically told Raine to stay away from you. Now that he knows she’s been lying about her work hours to sneak off with you, he’s going to be making some changes.” Matt’s words sink into the pit of my stomach. “You better get on home, Raine.”
We stand in silence for a moment as Matt walks over to the black truck sitting a few parking spaces down. His truck turns on, and not until I see its red taillights disappear down the street do I release the breath I’m holding. Ryland pulls me to him, cradling me in his arms, as if I am something breakable, something fragile. Maybe I am.
He stays quiet, rubbing smooth circles onto my back, never moving to leave me. He doesn’t try to solve my problems or remove my pain with empty words. He knows how bad this situation is, and it’s out of our control until we can move away. Instead, he lets me fall apart without trying to put me back together.