Chapter 15
The closing of a door roused Cordelia, and she made a slight groan at the annoying interference in one of the best night’s sleeps she’d had in a long, long while.
“What is it?” she asked groggily, turning over only to realize that while she was under a blanket, her nightgown was around her waist, and her breasts were bare.
“It is morning, Your Grace.” Anna’s voice burst into her dreamlike state.
Cordelia shot up, grasping to keep hold of the blanket as she did so. With eyes wide, she stared at a smiling Anna, and then she looked around her.
Where in the-?
And the memory struck her like a ton of bricks. A warm, hot, skillful mouth on her skin, her breasts, her mouth. Two rough palms sliding over her, fingers dipping inside her and foolish cries of pleasure and breathless pleas of his name, and afterward, she had fallen asleep in his room. In his bed!
No, no, no.
Cordelia wanted to scream with embarrassment, not just due to Anna discovering her but also because of her behavior with the duke.
“Anna, where might the duke be at present?” she asked, attempting to keep her cool while Anna looked rather pleased.
“He is at breakfast, and he told me to fetch you and to help get you ready. He would like to eat with you.”
Cordelia frowned. After her night of recklessness, she would prefer to have avoided Nicholas, if possible.
He is sure to be smugger than usual when I see him.
“Very well, but I will check on the twins first.”
“Of course, but Your Grace, you have a few ladies coming in about an hour for an interview.”
“Oh dear.” Cordelia put a hand to her forehead. “And I’ve awoken so late!”
She chastised herself inwardly for her own foolishness and lack of organization. This was not like her at all. But one night with the errant duke and she was a lost cause.
“I shall simply have to hurry,” she told Anna.
“I will see you in my room,” she told her lady’s maid, and then when Anna left, she set herself to rights, wrapped her robe around her again and left the room, not eager to look back upon the scene of the greatest pleasure she had ever felt.
Her body remembered, and there was a delicious ache between her thighs.
You must forget it, she told herself, for it could not happen again. Things that felt too good always had some price to pay. Especially when those things were connected to a man who confused her now more than ever. Who was he really?
Pushing away thoughts of what happened, she hurried to her room and got dressed. Soon enough, she was on her way to the nursery to see to the twins when she found Nicholas standing just outside the door, ready to go in. He turned at the sound of her footsteps and frowned at her.
Cordelia’s body reacted instantly, a tingle in her belly, goosebumps on her skin, her heart skipping a beat.
Foolish lust. It has no good sense.
It didn’t help that it looked like he’d bathed, shaved, and appeared fully rested, his shirtsleeves rolled up again and collar loose. She steeled herself for whatever he was about to say or do, and she kept her hands firmly at her sides, fearful they might betray her and try to reach for him.
“What are you doing here?” he asked.
“I am coming to look in on the twins.”
“Why are you not at breakfast?” he replied, standing between her and the door when she tried to open it.
The musky scent of him filled her nose, and she held her breath for a moment, for the rush of desire came back so fully, it was distracting.
“I have only just woken up, and I’m not hungry yet. I’ll see to the twins first.”
She tried to push past him again, but this time, he touched her chin and lifted it so that she could look into his eyes.
“Listen here, wife. I didn’t stay home so that you could not eat. That was the whole bloody purpose!”
“You are not my nanny, Your Grace,” she spat back, her body not allowing her to move away, even though she knew she must.
“No, I am not. I am your husband, and –” he paused, leaning down to whisper in her ear again.
No, no, no, not again.
At the feel of his cheek and his breath tickling her ear, Cordelia’s muscles grew all limp again.
“And I do not wish to see your legs shaking again from lack of food or anything else. Anything else but me giving you pleasure.”
Grasping at whatever sense was left to her, Cordelia pushed him back and opened the door quickly, shoving an amused Nicholas inside. She put a finger to her lips.
“Have you no sense of discretion? Someone may hear you! There are servants everywhere.”
“And what’s wrong with that?” he teased, crossing his arms over his broad chest as she leaned against the now closed door for support. “A man admiring his beautiful wife? Reminding her that he enjoys the feel and the taste of her? Nonsensical!”
She made a face at him, and then the twins stirred, bursting into tears at the sound of Nicholas’s loud voice.
“Oh, now look what you’ve done!” she said, hurrying to Olivia to pick her up.
He frowned, and when she looked up at him, she saw a look of remorse. He went to Tim’s bedside and knelt by him, reaching his hand out for Tim to take.
“Perk up, little man. There is a busy day to be had.” He turned back to her. “But first, breakfast, my dear!” Nicholas said. “We must go down.”
“Then, we’ll take them with us so that I can eat, and you’ll finally be satisfied.”
His gaze darkened, and she saw a muscle tick in his jaw, but he said nothing.
Ignoring his look, she turned away, taking Olivia with her.
“Take up Timothy, Your Grace!” she called, amused at leaving him on his own to finally pick up one of the children.
She was delighted to see him acquiescing, and at breakfast, she called a maid to assist with the children as they sat and ate.
This time, they all sat at one end of the table, and Cordelia tried not to notice how Nicholas asked for a footman to fill plates for her as well as the children.
“Be sure to serve the duchess first with as much food as you can fit on the plate,” he commanded before he himself sat down.
Olivia enjoyed sitting on her own, tears now gone, eating but also making a mess.
Tim had moved from his seat to crawl into Cordelia’s lap, and she gave him a bite or two of her own meal.
Cordelia noticed the maid’s distress at Olivia, and she smiled at her. “It is no trouble, Mary. They are only children. They will learn their table manners soon enough.”
“Of course, Your Grace,” the maid replied.
“I think we can handle things, Mary. I’m sure you have other duties,” Nicholas said kindly.
Mary looked to Cordelia who nodded, and then with a curtsy, she was gone.
“Do we have matters in hand, Nicholas?” Cordelia teased. She fed Tim a piece of toast, and he chewed away happily.
“We do, if you would start eating.” He glanced down at her food, and sighing, she began to eat, while keeping one hand on Tim.
She watched as Nicholas kept his eyes on Olivia. “She looks just like her, you know. Helen.”
A little ache filled Cordelia’s heart. “Yes, she does. She will be quite a beauty. We will have to do our best to keep her away from all the rakes that infest London.”
She smiled at him, and warmth bloomed in her stomach at his handsome, genuine smile in return.
“Are we an infestation, Cordelia? I’d say there are only a few good rakes who have any real skill at it. The rest are useless tossers.”
Cordelia laughed, mirth bubbling up from somewhere that she did not expect. She saw a light appear in Nicholas’s eyes, and her heart skipped at his happy expression.
“I don’t think I’ve ever heard you laugh before,” he said with a sort of awe. “Not to anything I’ve said, at least. David could always make you laugh.”
He looked down at his plate as he buttered a piece of toast, and Cordelia wondered if he was sad. He never truly showed it, but she was certain he was. He had lost a dear friend and now he was with a wife whom he did not marry for love.
“I remember when we first met that first fateful night and how we disliked one another immediately. I could feel it in the air.” She chuckled, shaking her head. “I was furious with Helen that she married a rake and had now drawn me into a circle of rakes.”
Nicholas looked at her and shrugged. “If you must know, I never disliked you, love. It was always you who couldn’t stand me.” He lifted a brow, and Cordelia blushed, embarrassed that she had said such a thing.
It would not have bothered her before, but it did now, now that they were married and now that last night had occurred. She was surprised when he continued.
“I always thought you lovely, beautiful, intelligent. You were just always quick to react and share your honest opinions. You were not like any other woman I’d met before, and it only made you easier to tease.”
“Which made me angrier and angrier,” she said, trying to keep her face from going beet red at his compliments.
He chuckled. “Yes, and I only fanned the flames.”
She was surprised, truly and honestly surprised. She had assumed their constant tense banter had been because they both disapproved of one another. She didn’t know what to do with this new truth.
Helen, had you known this?
Suddenly, she realized just how unfair she had been towards him over the years, and looking at him again while he cut his meat, she saw him in a new light, a light that scared her to death.
“You must get your strength from your mother.”
“Oh yes,” she answered, clearing her throat, recovering from the swirl of new and confused thoughts in her mind. “My father too. He loved my mother so dearly, and he never tried to contain her or my sisters. He always approved of women learning and speaking their mind.”
Nicholas nodded. “I rather enjoy it myself,” he teased, his eyes flashing wickedly. “A woman speaking her mind.”
Cordelia looked down at her plate again to avoid his gaze and took another bite. She thought she heard a soft chuckle from Nicholas.
“I think your family delightful. I didn’t know the viscount, but now that I’ve met your mother and sisters, I am very glad to be connected to them.”
“A destitute family?” she said in a morbid tone.
“Hardly destitute anymore, Cordelia. Besides, I know plenty of rich people who are arseholes, so I much prefer a poorer family with good sense who make good company.”
“Nicholas! Your language!” she cried, looking down at the children.
The children stared at them, and then with a muffled effort, with food in his mouth, Tim repeated, “attthole.”
“Now you’ve done it,” she said to Nicholas, and then they burst into laughter.
The warm, happy sound filled the room, and Cordelia brushed tears from her eyes while Nicholas’s shoulders shook. It felt like something had shifted in the air and released, and she was smiling, feeling like the day got just a little bit brighter.
“I will be better from now on,” he said, crossing his fingers over his heart.
She rolled her eyes. “No, you will not. But an attempt would be desirable.”
He nodded in acquiescence. “I assume your father would never have done such a thing.”
“He was very circumspect.” She grinned, thinking back to the past. “I never saw two people love each other more, well, perhaps Helen and David.” She sighed. “They would argue, but they would always make up, and we saw far too many kisses between them than I wanted to.”
She chuckled softly, but then a little pain cut through her. “When he died, we realized there were a number of debts. He’d mismanaged several affairs, and so we had to sell so much of the house, so much of his things.”
Nicholas reached toward her and gripped her free hand and gave it a squeeze. His eyes were genuine as he said, “I’m sorry, Cordelia.”
She swallowed back the emotion that suddenly built in her throat and took another bite of food, eager to remain happy and strong.
“Thank you. I’d made my peace with it, but once we found out about the children coming under my care, my mother sold the last thing she had of his.
A pocket watch. It laid open on her nightstand since his death, but it was plated in pure gold and I’m sure she hoped it would have been a large sum, but she received much less than expected.
I suspect it was all the scratches on it. ”
Nicholas frowned, his brows furrowing together. “I’m sorry to hear it. Pure gold you say?”
“Yes. And now that everything is settled, I wish I could get it back to her, to give her that last piece of her true love back.” She was surprised at Nicholas’s odd expression. “What is it?”
His face cleared. “Oh, nothing.” Smiling again, he cut another piece of meat. “I’m only sorry to hear that your mother had to sell such a priceless heirloom. I’m sure she misses it.”
Cordelia sighed. “Yes, I’m sure she does.”
“They know nothing of the buyer?”
She shook her head. “My sister and I looked into it a little. We hoped to try to get it back. Apparently, the buyer used his servant to purchase it on his behalf and no name was given.”
“I see.” Nicholas frowned again, and Cordelia wondered why he should care so much about the incident.
She shrugged, smiling as she gazed at the children. “I shall put it out of my mind for the day, I think. And see just what sorts of games these two would like to get up to.” Nervous, she asked him, “Will you join us?”
He looked deep in thought and didn’t answer for a few seconds. But then he replied, “No, I will be in my study. Some business to attend to.”
She nodded, attempting to not look too disappointed.
He brought his napkin to his mouth and stood.
“But I will be here, so don’t think you can get away with not eating again.
” He pointed at her with a stern expression.
She crossed her fingers over her heart, and he smirked.
“Good. I’m off, but at the ready if you should ever need me again.
For things of the ‘shaking leg’ variety. ”
He winked and left her on her own, wondering now just what sort of man she’d married. Was he a rake? Or was he a good man? She had also thought him a wolf in sheep’s clothing, but now, she wondered very much if it wasn’t the other way around.