Chapter 12 #2
He shrugged out of his shirt but left his trousers on as he stretched out beside her. He lifted up onto one elbow and stared down at her, his appreciative gaze taking in every inch of her. She fought the urge to cover herself, though her entire body flushed with heat.
He’d been with some of the most beautiful women in London.
Actresses, opera singers, and courtesans.
She feared that he would be disappointed, but the soft sound of appreciation he made was music to her ears.
Running his hand lightly down her body from her breast to her hip, he met her anxious gaze and smiled.
“You are so beautiful,” he whispered before he covered her lips with his, kissing her so long and deep that she forgot to be nervous about her body, forgot to feel anything other than desire for this man, for her handsome husband who was about to make her his wife in truth.
He nudged her thighs apart with one of his, and then settled over her, the heat of his chest pressing against hers. He continued to kiss her, but one of his hands roamed her skin, learning every inch of her, and the other was braced to hold his weight.
The sensations overwhelmed her. He was so big, so warm, so strong, and he tasted so good. His hand skimmed her bare breasts, teasing her erect nipples as fire danced in her veins, and she shifted restlessly, needing more, because now she finally had an inkling of what that might be.
When she didn’t think she could stand it anymore, his fingertips drifted lower until he reached that magical spot he’d found at the theater.
She moaned into his mouth as he swirled his thumb around it.
When she was certain that she’d shatter to pieces as she had before, he changed direction, putting his finger inside her now.
She gasped, her eyes flying open, but he just kissed her again, his dark eyes so intense and sensual that warmth flooded her once again. “Relax, my darling. Let yourself get accustomed to having me in your body.”
She shuddered. She vaguely knew what was to come, of course, but hadn’t quite understood the mechanics of it.
But as she forced herself to calm down, she found she quite liked the feel of his finger moving in and out of her while his thumb continued to rub enchanting circles on that little button she hadn’t even realized she possessed.
Then he put two fingers inside her, and the sensation was too much.
That amazing feeling she’d felt at the theater flashed through her, and she shuddered, her thighs slamming together as heat danced through her.
This was what they wrote poems and songs about.
This was why people made fools of themselves in the name of love.
When she came back to herself, he was pressing sweet kisses across her brow, smiling at her with a tenderness and pride that made something deep inside her heart stir.
She hadn’t known. She hadn’t realized that lovemaking could make her feel like this.
She hadn’t expected that he’d put her pleasure before his own, because she knew enough to realize that nothing they’d done so far had given him the same satisfaction.
“How are you feeling?” he asked softly.
“Wonderful,” she breathed.
Pulling slightly away from her, he shucked off his trousers so that he was as naked as she. Rolling back toward her, he brushed her hair out of her eyes. “Would you like to touch me?” he asked. “I want you to be comfortable with my body before we go any further.”
She flushed but nodded vigorously. She’d often wondered what he looked like under his clothes, had thought endlessly about the brief glance of his member she’d gotten in the Dark Walks that night.
She pushed up onto her own elbow, leaning a bit over him, taking in the beauty of his strong, muscular body.
His chest was a powerful swell of muscle, with a small patch of silky dark hair in the center of his chest between his nipples that narrowed to a thin line down the hard ridges of his stomach.
His member was thick and long, and she couldn’t resist reaching out and touching it lightly.
It jumped beneath her fingertips, and he let out a strangled gasp.
“Did I hurt you?” she asked, chagrined.
He shook his head. “No, it felt good. Wrap your hand around it,” he whispered. “I want your touch so badly. It seems like I’ve waited an eternity.”
She did as he asked, and he moaned as she ran her fingertips over him from base to tip, then closed her hand around him and gave him a hesitant stroke. She hadn’t thought it would feel like this. The heft and silkiness of his skin surprised her.
“Like this,” he murmured, wrapping his hand around hers and guiding her in the rhythm he obviously liked. After just a few strokes, he released her hand and leaned back, his beautiful eyes closing as he gave in to the sensation, obviously enjoying it.
She liked pleasing him. She liked it very much. Remembering what the woman at Vauxhall had done, she leaned forward and experimentally kissed the mushroom-shaped head, making his eyes fly open in obvious shock and delight.
“Oh, my darling, you are so sweet, so perfect. And I want that from you… You can’t imagine how much. But it might be too much for your first time.”
He gathered her against him and rolled them both until she was once again on her back, and he was poised above her. This time, though, he rubbed his hot shaft against her slick core, making her gasp and wrap her legs around him, trying to get closer.
“This might hurt a bit, but only this time, and I promise I won’t go any further until you’re ready,” he said, his voice rough with restraint.
She bit her lip and nodded, though she was suddenly nervous, because now that she’d held him in her hand, she worried there was no way he could possibly fit inside her.
Easing back a bit, he pressed the tip of himself to her opening, then eased forward bit by bit until he was fully seated within her. It stung a bit, and she felt impossibly stretched, but it didn’t hurt nearly as much as she’d feared.
“Are you all right?” he asked, peering down at her in concern, though she could feel his big body trembling with his restraint. “Is this too much?”
“I’m all right,” she assured him.
Kissing her deeply, he eased himself back a bit, then pressed forward again.
This time, it felt a little better. The full, heavy weight of him and the friction of skin against skin were like nothing she’d ever imagined.
He was patient, guiding her with soft words and lingering kisses, until the pain melted into a low, throbbing heat that radiated through her entire body.
As they moved together, Tamsin wrapped her arms around his neck, pulling him closer, wanting to absorb him into her. Nothing that Olivia had said could have prepared her for this, the closeness and intimacy of becoming one with another person.
When he eased back a bit, she almost protested, until he reached between them and touched that spot once again with his thumb as he continued to move within her, making the warm tingling start to build within her.
But this time, it was even better, because he was inside her, stroking her with such passionate fury, and the combined sensations were simply too much, too raw and powerful to withstand for long.
The culmination was a blurred, breathless shattering of everything she had ever known.
She cried out his name, her entire body tightening around him and then releasing.
Rowan cried out as well, then collapsed against her, his face buried in the crook of her neck, his heart hammering a frantic rhythm against her chest.
Tamsin lay in the quiet aftermath, holding him tightly, never wanting to let him go.
A profound sense of peace washed over her, and she didn’t think she could have moved if the house was on fire.
She loved the heavy weight of him, his heat, his scent, the tickle of his hair against her skin.
If this was what lovemaking was like, she didn’t understand why everyone wasn’t doing it every minute of every day.
Five minutes or more passed before either of them moved or spoke, but at last he rolled off her, onto his back, though he wrapped his arm around her and pulled until her head came to rest against his chest.
“Is it always like that?” she asked softly, running her fingertips through a whorl of hair on his powerful chest.
He was quiet for so long that a pit of unease formed in her belly. She was so stupid to ask him such a thing. He’d done this act with multitudes of women. How silly of her to think that this time had been anything special. She’d had no idea what she was doing.
“No,” he said at last, sounding deeply unnerved. He put his finger under her chin and tilted her face so he could look into her eyes. “I’ve never felt so… present. Not just physically close but emotionally close as well. You’re my wife, Tamsin. That made it very special.”
Relief flooded through her. She’d needed to hear that more than he could ever know. She hoped he meant it because the emotions flooding through her were too powerful and dangerous to put a name to. He could break her heart so easily.
“I thought it was special, too,” she whispered, finding it hard to hold his intense gaze. “You’re nothing I thought you’d be, Rowan. You’re so much more.”
He laughed softly and finally released her gaze, pressing her cheek against his chest once more. “That might just be the nicest thing anyone has ever said to me.”
She found that sad, and she wished she had the courage to say just a few of things that were in her heart right now. But exhaustion overwhelmed her, and she drifted off to sleep before she could tell him just how special he was to her.