Rebel #2
“Thank you. Tell Diesel you want a similar room. He’ll get it.”
“This seems very expensive. I’m not with him for his money.”
“He has it. You don’t have to be with him for his money to expect him to give you some.”
“Would you ask for money from him?”
“Nope. If that motherfucker didn’t give me money without me having to ask for it, he’d have a problem.”
She twisted her hands together. “H-how much?”
“That depends. What do you think you’re worth?”
“A hundred dollars a month?”
Rebel choked.
“Fifty?” Jana squeaked.
Groaning dramatically, Rebel shook her head.
“Oh my god, you have so fucking much to learn.” This poor woman.
What the fuck was Diesel saying to her that made her devalue herself so much?
She wanted him at any cost, so it made sense that she’d see herself through whatever fucked up lens he viewed her.
“Tell him that you want twenty-five hundred dollars a week at the fucking minimum. If he gives you pushback, send him to me.”
Her eyes rounding, Jana gasped. “I…absolutely not. Mama was shocked at the amount he put into the account for the wedding planning.”
Rebel hadn’t intended to ask Jana about that, but since she brought it up… “Yeah, about that. Why is he giving your mother money and not you?”
“I-I can’t handle money well. I spend it on stupid things.”
That didn’t make sense. What was extra money for except to spend on stupid things? “So, you’d ask for a lot of money and stake your claim.”
Squirming, Jana met Rebel’s gaze. “Would you also question him?”
“Why are you asking me what I would do when Diesel belongs to you?” she snapped, fed up with Jana, Diesel, and their stupid relationship.
“I’m telling you what I would do, but suppose Diesel flips out because you’ve never put constraints on him or made demands? Then what? I’d be accused of sabotage.”
Jana burst into tears, and Rebel glowered at her.
“I’m sorry. Truly. I just want you to like me and get to know me. I want—”
It annoyed Rebel so fucking much that Diesel put her in this position. She had no clue how her telling him to fuck off turned into Jana sitting in her room.
“Fuck me,” Rebel snarled. “And I don’t say that lightly because I love myself very much. But you aren’t here for me. You’re here for Diesel. What you say matters. What you want matters. Whether I never talk to you again does not matter. You’re who Diesel wants and plans to marry. I’m a non-issue.”
“You aren’t,” Jana pushed out. “I hear it in his voice whenever he talks about you.”
Diesel was such a miserable motherfucker. He’d probably told Jana something to make her jealous. It backfired and left her paranoid instead.
“Call Diesel,” she instructed. She hated to put herself through more emotional turmoil, but Jana needed to see for herself that Rebel had no bearing on his actions.
Five minutes later, he breezed into the room. As she suspected, he hadn’t left for work.
He halted next to Jana’s chair and placed a hand on her shoulder. His dark hair was askew and his gray eyes taunted Rebel. His wide shoulders…
Nope! Rebel refused to inventory him. Fuck him.
He smiled at Jana. “You two had a good talk?”
“Lovely,” she mumbled.
Diesel’s smile faltered and he turned icy gray eyes to Rebel. She flipped him off.
“What did you say to Jana?” he demanded.
“Not a fucking thing that I’m interested in sharing with you, fuckface,” she replied. “But what I’m telling you is I fucking hate you.”
He blinked, stilled. Stared at her.
Probably at the ease in which she said the words. Somewhere inside her, she really felt that way. It was just buried underneath girlish fantasies and childish dreams. As much as she understood that Diesel was a motherfucker, she just didn’t want to accept it.
He’d never spare her feelings if he cheated. He’d never spoil her or stand by her. Or…
It didn’t matter. He didn’t matter. She’d had a crush that no one ever took seriously, especially Diesel.
Not only didn’t he take how she felt as something real, he wasn’t interested in safeguarding her from further hurt.
He wasn’t even divorced from Tabitha and was already living with Jana. Or whatever he was doing.
“You hate me because of Jana?” Diesel demanded, the first one to break their silence.
Rebel smirked. “You moved her in here, not caring how I felt, so fuck you. Get out and take her with you. Please don’t darken my fucking door again.”
His expression pained, he glanced from her to Jana several times. “I want you to be happy for me, Rebel.”
She was so tempted to push the issue, but she couldn’t bear Diesel’s turmoil.
Then, there was Jana, who looked so devastated.
The entire situation confused Rebel. She couldn’t understand why Diesel proposed to Jana if he didn’t intend to put her first. Nor could she understand why Jana accepted if she didn’t expect Diesel to put her first.
“Can you do that for me?” he asked softly. “Congratulate me? Want the best for me?”
Tears rushed to Rebel’s eyes, but she refused to let them fall. Three miserable motherfuckers would do no one any good. “I’m happy for you, Diesel. And you, Jana. Just give me a chance to accept your upcoming marriage and stay out of my way.”
“Would you prefer I find somewhere else for Jana to live, sweetheart?”
Most definitely. Those words tickled her tongue, but she scraped her teeth across the appendage and ignored them. Especially when Jana’s continued despair and devastation affected Rebel. Something else that confused her. Why did she even care?
“This is your house too, Dee.” Her voice cracked, but she forced her tears away. “You have every right to move whoever you want in. Jana is so much nicer than I’ll ever be. She might gentle you down, give you the peace you’ve always searched for. As long as you’re happy, I am fine.”
Diesel walked to her, his tall, muscular frame blocking her view of Jana. He didn’t seem to give a fuck that his back was to the woman he intended to marry while he focused on Rebel.
He tipped her chin up. “You have the most beautiful eyes I’ve ever seen. Do you know that, Reb?”
She wished he’d leave so she could cry. She shrugged.
“They look like glistening sapphires.”
“Would you just go?” she whispered, not pointing out how fucking disrespectful he was being to Jana.
He’d argue that Rebel was his sister and he her brother, but his words felt so…
so…intimate. The intensity with which he said them didn’t sound very familial.
How could either one of them think this was okay?
Or, maybe, her thoughts were wrong and Diesel’s were right.
Maybe she didn’t trust him because of his reputation and she’d smother him with her demands for accountability.
What did she know? Jana must’ve believed in Diesel a lot, more than Rebel could ever.
As her adopted brother, he’d abandoned her, lied to her, and disregarded her.
She couldn’t imagine what he’d think he could do to her if they were anything more.
He could only ever be her brother. Nothing more. Nothing less.
A sob rose up. “I will be so fucking angry if I start to cry in front of you.”
“The Blonde Viper returns.”
At his dry tone, she made herself smile.
“Your birthday is in six weeks. What do you want?”
“A hot pink Corvette. Momma and me can match.”
He dropped his hand and stepped back. “Will you know how to drive by then?”
“It’ll be a new car. It’ll last until I learn.”
“Obviously, you’ve given this a lot of thought.”
“Rule’s in LA. Whatever Momma and Daddy were going to spend on a party, they can put toward my gift. I don’t want to celebrate my birthday without my brother.”
“I’ll talk to Aunt Meggie and Uncle Christopher.”
“Why?”
“I’d like to put money toward the gift.”
“Why? The Corvette would be your gift to me. Momma already has my list of what I want from them. CJ has his list, too.”
“Goddamn.” Diesel shook his head. “You’re saying that without flinching.”
“Should I? I’m worth every cent. Just wait until you see my list for my sixteenth birthday.”
“Can you let me off the hook for a fucking car for this birthday. Wouldn’t that be a better Sweet Sixteen gift?”
Rebel heaved in a breath. “You’re right. A rare occurrence so don’t get used to it.”
He smiled and finally turned to Jana. She sat meekly in the chair, allowing Diesel to Diesel. When he held out his hand, she placed hers in his and allowed him to tug her to her feet.
He kissed her again. Rebel told herself it didn’t matter.
Only when he led Jana out and closed the door did Rebel finally give into her tears.