Chapter 29
CHAPTER TWENTY-NINE
FALLON
L aying on my bed, my body still humming with my need for Nash, I considered taking matters into my own hands. I’m so tired of taking care of myself, and I could still feel Nash’s touch pleasuring me, making me feel something other than despair. But now he’d grown a conscience out of nowhere.
Unknown: You never dropped to your knees for me, but you do it for him any time you can.
Unknown: You’ll be doing that for me when you come home.
Unknown: Did he turn you down? That must hurt, judging from your face.
Unknown: Touch yourself. Come on, touch yourself so I can watch.
Unknown: I’m your fucking husband and I want you to touch yourself, bitch, do it.
The texts were rapid fire, and every one caused more bile to rise in my throat. He saw us. Jumping off my bed, I pulled the door open and ran to the now dark living room. He must have gone to bed. Running up the stairs in my bare feet, I realized that over the month I’d been here; I hadn’t come upstairs. Knocking, I waited.
“What do you want, Fallon?” Nash asked as he opened the door to his room. His hair was disheveled, and he’s taken off his shirt. I was kind of surprised he hadn’t put it back on. The tattoos on his torso made me weak in the knees. I’d always been a sucker for a man with ink. Andrew didn’t have any, and one more time I wondered what I’d even seen in him?
Our eyes both moved to my phone when it vibrated in my hand. “He’s texting again.” I held my phone out and Nash looked at the last few. His eyes narrowed, I watched him clench his jaw, and the muscle flexed.
Unknown: Now you’re in his room?
“You’re not staying in that room tonight. Take mine and I will figure out how he’s seeing things.” Nash didn’t hand my phone back to me. He just stomped around the room, gathering a few things, and pointed to the bed. “Sleep Toots, I’m taking this.” He held up my phone before walking out of his room.
Looking around, I saw a photo frame on the nightstand. Walking over to it, I picked it up and was shocked as I stared at myself. I’d been probably twenty-three when it was taken. I was on the back of my horse, Goliath. Smiling, I thought back to when I got the beast. I was twelve, and he was already massive, but my dad thought he’d be perfect for me. We fought with each other from that day on. He had his own ideas about what way we should go, and I tried to make him see that I was the boss.
He shouldn’t have been a good barrel racing horse, but once we’d figured one another out, we acted as one. He moved stealthily around the barrels and I’d won more buckles on his back than I could ever wear.
This picture was from one of the rodeo’s I’d won at. It was taken when we were flying down the middle of the arena, heading for home. I was tucked down, letting him fly, my hat suspended in mid-air, my long hair flying out wildly behind me. I was spurring him on and my legs were almost straight out just before I would have brought them down against his flanks.
Smiling, I could almost hear the crowd, feel the wind against my face, and imagine his power under my ass. “It was the most exciting run I’d ever seen you do.” His voice was low behind me and I almost dropped the picture.
Looking over my shoulder, I smiled at Nash, leaning against the door frame. His arms crossed and eyes locked on me. He held up my pillow. “Thought you might need this.” He tossed it on the bed.
“Why do you keep this beside your bed?” I asked as I set it back down and turned to face him.
“It was the moment you were truly free and happy. Before your world came tumbling down, when everything was right and you didn’t have a care in the world.” He shrugged, but didn’t move further into the room.
“What do you tell your dates when they come here? Isn’t it creepy having a picture of a girl beside your bed?”
“I told you, I don’t bring women home.” His expression was flat, and I wasn’t sure I believed him.
“Ever?” My one word question was more from disbelief. I hadn’t expected him to be a monk, but never bringing anyone home seemed excessive.
“Nope.”
“Why?”
His brow lifted slightly, and he smirked. “Bringing home random women when there’s only ever been one I want here seemed counterintuitive. I didn’t want to look around and see the memory of another woman in my bed, or on the couch. This place was for you, Fallon, nobody else.” He took a ragged breath and moved into the room and sat on the end of the bed. “We talked about your dream house years ago, remember? Two story, big front porch so we could sit out there with friends. A big kitchen and dining room so we can make it into the gathering place and the window seat so you could watch the storms come in.” He looked at the floor instead of looking at me.
“Nash.” I whispered. He was right. We’d talked about a future, how we wanted our lives to look and he’d remembered it all. His eyes filled with pain and it made me ache to know I’d caused it.
“I know I’ve been a dickwad and when all this shakes out, I want the chance to show you I’m not that man that left three years ago. Being with you and the girls is the only thing I want. I’d give everything up for you, Fallon, and I wouldn’t even care. We could be broke, living in a small shack, and I’d do it as long as you were with me.” He finally looked up, and the sincerity in his eyes made my heart grow.
I sat beside him and took his hand in mine. “I want all traces of him out of your life before you’re mine again.” He whispered. Lowering my head, I let it rest on his shoulder and I nodded.
“Me too. I want to be only yours Nash, thank you for waiting for me.” We sat in silence for a long time. It would have been so easy to lie down in his arms and forget there was a world outside the surrounding walls.
“Good night, Fallon.” he said as he stood and walked out of his room. I heard a phone chime as he walked down the stairs. The sound of his steps faltered, and then grew closer and the door flung open. “You and the girls are going to Pop’s. I know it’s a shitty time to wake them both up, but you can’t stay here.” His words were whispered, and he held up his finger to his lips for me not to say anything.
He looked around the room and found a piece of paper, then pulled me into the closet to see what he was writing. His horrible penmanship hadn’t changed, and I watched him scrawl.
Ryder found cameras and listening devices when he scanned the living room. They weren’t here when he checked before, so they’re new. Pop’s should be safe. This guy seems focused on you and hasn’t figured out he’s my dad.
I nodded and took his hand as we went back downstairs. I was thankful the diaper bag I carried had enough diapers for a few days, and a change of clothes for both girls. Wanda also had made sure she had things the girls would need. When she’d told me during supper one night, I couldn’t believe someone would want my girls to feel comfortable in their home without really even knowing them.
Andrew’s family had always treated Josie like the plague. They never wanted her around and made sure she wasn’t welcome in their home. Andrew would go for family supper and I would stay home with Josie. I wish it had just been Andrew that had been a shit human being, but he’d learned from the best.
The furnace kicked in and the whir made me wonder if it was enough to drown out the sound of us leaving. I met Nash in the hallway, Lottie in my arms, Josie in his. He tried to smile, but worry was etched on his face. “Ryder has everything scrambled, but can’t keep it that way for long. It should be enough for us to leave, and when I get back, we’ll wipe this place.” Nash was speaking barely above a whisper and I nodded.
Headlights shone out the large window, and I looked over my shoulder. “It’s Kipp. He’s going to take you to town.”
“I thought you’d take us in.”
“Honey.” I frowned at the term of affection and he smiled then shook his head, “Toots, I’m going to be here hoping he doesn’t suspect anything. You know you're just as safe with your brother as you’d be with me.”
We walked out to the porch and Nash buckled Josie into her car seat and I snapped Lottie’s carrier into the base. “I’ll come get you as soon as we have the house cleared,” he said as he wrapped me up in his arms. I shivered in his arms. He let me go, but still held my hands. Lowering his head, he brushed a light kiss on my lips. Kipp cleared his throat behind us and heat flushed through me.
“Here’s a phone. I’m keeping yours, so we know when he texts. All the numbers you need are programmed in.” He handed me the burner phone, and I tucked it in the diaper bag.
“Thanks,” I said, trying to smile as I looked up at him, making him believe I was being brave when all I wanted to do was hide under the covers for the rest of my life.
Climbing in the truck, the door slamming and the double tap on the box letting Kipp know to drive away made my heart break. I was leaving the ranch again for an unknown amount of time. While it was all I could think of after Lottie was born, I didn’t want to leave now. A tear rolled down my cheek, and I blinked it away quickly.
“So you’re kissing Nash now?” Kipp finally spoke as we bounced over the Texas gate. I could see him even in the dark thanks to the glow of the dash. His expression was blank and I couldn’t read him.
“This isn’t any of your business, Kipp.” I snapped.
“No? It’s eleven-thirty at night. I left my pregnant wife and son at home alone and I’m driving you to town because your apparent psycho husband is trying to get to you. Pretty sure it’s my business now.” He turned to look at me and in the dark, in the confines of the truck, I couldn’t keep it in.
More tears rolled down my face. “I wanted to hate him, Kipp. He left and told me I wasn’t worth fighting for, but I’m like a moth to a flame. I can’t avoid even if I want to.” Using my sleeve, I wipe at my eyes. The engine hums, the radio is barely audible, and my sniffles are all the noise in the truck. “Kissing him wasn’t planned, but it’s happened a few times.” I stared down at my hands, and bit the corner of my mouth, waiting for whatever lecture he was conjuring in his mind.
“Has there been more?”
“Some, yes, but we both agreed not to take things further until I have divorce papers in my hands.” I rolled my eyes because I felt like he knew I wasn’t telling the entire truth. “Okay, we didn’t agree. He told me nothing more would happen and I guess I’ve had to accept it.”
My brother was silent beside me. I knew he didn’t like the idea of Nash and I but he was accepting of the fact that Josie was Nash’s. I’d spent too many years caring what people thought of me and that included Kipp. “Kipp, I’m not a kid anymore. You don’t have to protect me.”
“Fallon, you’re my baby sister. I will protect you until the end of my days.” He didn’t look at me, just stayed focused on the road, but I knew his words were spoken sincerely and with conviction. I could be eighty years old and Kipp would still think he had to protect me, and I’d let him.