17. Nathan #2
“It was me,” I say forcefully. “I found Cas. I mated him first. And I killed Keir all on my own. Nobody else should pay for my crimes.”
Kato opens his mouth, a protest forming on his lips that turns into a hiss as I lean over and dig my claws into his thigh.
I’m gentle, though. As gentle as I can be, anyway. “Hush,” I whisper to him. “Let me do this.”
“But—”
Declan speaks before Kato can issue a rebuttal. “You admit your guilt so readily, knowing what it would mean?”
I swallow, meeting Declan’s gaze unflinchingly.
“I take full responsibility.” My leg aches in memory of the last punishment from Declan.
I was far younger then, and weaker. It’s a blessing I still have my leg at all, given how mangled Declan left it.
Learning to walk again after weeks laid up in bed had been a lesson in humility.
The beta doctor did a wonderful job, but there was only so much he could do.
The pain I still feel in it today is a testament to Declan’s method of rule. I should know better than to throw myself back into the jaws of the lion, but here I am, doing it again. I will be the sacrificial lamb in the hope I can protect Kato and Cas from punishment.
“No!” Kato shouts right beside me. “I also killed someone, Uncle. Whatever punishment Nathan receives, I should too.”
Fucking idiot. I should have known jumping on the grenade would result in Kato somehow blowing himself up too. Self-preservation may not be his strong suit, but I wouldn’t have him any other way.
Seeming smaller than ever, Cas raises a hand and speaks. “I think I’m probably at least a little to blame, as well.”
Declan’s face tightens with displeasure as the hall erupts in cries of agreement and murmurs of dissent. Our alpha has lost control. A barked command silences the room, so quiet I can hear every one of Cas and Kato’s nervous breaths, synced up, just like our heartbeats.
“I suppose that with your preemptive admissions of guilt,” Declan says, voice devoid of inflection, “we can dispense with the formality of today’s trial and skip to the sentencing.” His lips form a thin smile as he casts his gaze across the room before returning it to me. “Exile for Nathan Ross.”
I swallow. Exile wasn’t something I’d considered. I was prepared for physical punishment, not exile.
Not that I haven’t fantasised about leaving Declan’s pack—many times, especially when I was in recovery.
Leaving was always too much of a risk, though.
City wolves live in smaller packs and have learned how to survive around humans.
Declan’s pack is all I’ve ever known—living off the land, having the freedom to slip into the fur of my wolf whenever I want.
I can’t do much for work other than construction and joinery, and it’s not like I have a formal qualification for any of it.
Declan’s insularity has ensured our reliance on the pack for both work and survival.
If I’d left of my own volition and gone to the city, I’d probably have ended up joining one of the shifter fighting rings, forced to rip other wolves apart for the entertainment of humans.
With my leg how it is, there’s no guarantee I’d have made it out of the arena.
City wolves are so separate from the rest of us—their ability to cohabitate with humans, the limited time they spend in their fur, and their lack of reliance on pack bonds almost enough to convince me they’re an entirely different breed.
My other option would have been to find another rural pack that welcomed lone alphas.
Betas are free to move between packs and omegas are always welcomed.
Coveted, even. But alphas with no relations within a pack only present problems—whether as rivals for the affection of unmated omegas, or as potential challengers for leadership.
I’d have presented a problem either way. Too much of a risk to gamble on the kindness of another pack alpha. And if Declan has taught me anything, it’s that pack alphas aren’t the forgiving type.
So, I should have guessed Declan’s addendum to his ruling. “Exile for Nathan and the omega. Kato will remain here, on probation. One strike and he’s out, too.”
The wounded noise from Cas twists my stomach into knots. The three of us can’t be separated. Long-term separation from your mate is widely known in shifter circles as the worst pain imaginable—and having been apart from Cas for only a short time, I don’t doubt it.
Shit. If Declan thinks this won’t kill Kato, he’s sorely mistaken. I hadn’t considered exile—a miscalculation on my part. The depth of Declan’s cruelty knows no end.
“Uncle,” Kato protests, “you can’t do this.”
“Unless every member of the council opposes me, I can,” Declan responds.
He turns to face the three members as Kato gives me a desperate look.
I can’t do anything about this, though. The only way would be for me to challenge Declan for leadership of the pack, and there’s no way I’d win.
I may be able to resist his commands, but he’s stronger than me.
And I’m hardly at my best after spending a couple of nights in a makeshift prison, right after fighting for my life and going through an unnatural rut.
If I were to challenge him now, it wouldn’t go in my favour.
One day, maybe I’ll be a match for him.
Predictably, Graham casts his vote with Declan. My heart sinks. It’s over already, decision upheld—there’s no way Niall and Eden will oppose Declan.
Niall, however, has his jaw set in a firm line.
“I don’t believe the punishment fits the crime, Alpha,” he says, his head lowered in deference but his eyes steely and full of rebellion.
“Killing in self-defence due to an unwitting heat and uncontrollable ruts doesn’t make them criminals.
They’re slaves to their biology, just like the rest of us. ”
I let out a startled breath. Despite our friendship, I hadn’t expected Niall to put his neck on the line for us. Judging by Declan’s thunderous expression, neither had he.
“Omega,” Declan barks, directing the full force of his displeasure at Eden. “What do you say?”
Eden looks ready to fall to his knees and present in front of the entire pack. His eyes go wide and he glances at Cas before focusing back on his alpha. “I don’t think it’s fair, either,” he whispers.
Nobody in the room is as shocked at his omega mate’s disobedience as Declan is.
Because that’s how he’ll see it: an act of betrayal, going against his alpha’s wishes.
I’m proud of the nervous little thing, even as he studiously avoids meeting anyone’s gaze, his attention rooted on his hands where he’s wringing them in his lap.
“What did you say?” Declan asks, his voice as sharp as a carving knife, and just as deadly.
Eden swallows, his Adam’s apple bobbing. “They shouldn’t be exiled,” he says, directing his words towards the floor. I don’t know why he’s doing this. The verdict is set. And then I see the omega’s eyes dart towards Cas. Fuck. I do know, after all.
He thinks Cas might be pregnant. Eden is putting his own wellbeing on the line for the potential baby growing in Cas’s womb.
I have to stop Declan from taking his ire out on Eden. I get to my feet and stride towards our pack alpha whilst he’s distracted with glaring at his mate. A couple of the other alphas try—ineffectually—to stop me. I muscle through and get right in Declan’s face.
“Whatever you’re thinking of doing to him in retribution,” I grit out, voice low enough that in the furore in the room only Declan will hear it, “don’t.”