23. amelia
23
AMELIA
E ven before I opened my eyes, I heard the heavy raindrops pattering against the window. It mirrored my mood, which failed to lift even with the awareness that I was waking up in Gray's bed, a place that should banish any gloom.
I fumbled blindly for the notebook I had placed on the nightstand. If I didn't jot down what I had dreamed the night before now, I'd forget it within the next five minutes—and that would be a terrible shame because Gray had featured in it, and I never wanted to forget those dreams.
From the bathroom, I heard the sound of the shower running, which probably meant I had a few more minutes to document my thoughts without him sapping my brain power with his presence. Sometimes, when he looked at me, I still tended to forget everything on the spot. My name. Perhaps even my entire existence.
Sometimes, I found it amusing, the effect he had on me. And sometimes, it reminded me that in his presence, I never worried about anything. Dinner? There was enough variety in the fridge for me to whip up whatever I fancied. Leaving the house? He had the keys and everything else we needed. My car? The dashboard lights weren't flickering anymore, and by some sort of magic, there was always enough gas in the tank. Not to mention the other little things that had naturally established themselves between us. He took care of me—and I took care of him. Since I had been here, he hadn't missed a meal due to work calling.
I looked up as Gray appeared in the doorway, a towel wrapped around his waist. It hung so low that it left little to the imagination. With another, he was drying his hair.
"Are you writing why you're feeling down?" One look at my face and Gray knew. By now, I wasn't surprised that he effortlessly noticed the subtle shifts between my normal mood and any changes upward or downward.
Closing the book, I sat up a little. "This is my dream journal," I informed him. "I might have just written down what you did to me in my dream."
So far, I had not enlightened him about the purpose of the book nor the fact that he dominated not only every waking moment but also those I spent asleep. "So, you're insatiable to the point that reality isn't enough for you, huh?"
"Is that what you conclude from this?"
"Or perhaps your mood is tied to me not living up to your dreams? And now you're complaining about it in your book?"
I burst out laughing. Gray didn't need to worry about being unable to satisfy me. I shook my head. "Don't worry, my dreams don't harm your reputation. And to be honest, they don't even come close to reality. Today's just one of those days when I woke up feeling off. It's hardly about you."
"And it's all about the weather outside," he added to my sentence. "But the weather plays into my hands. Do you want to stay in bed, or will you come with me?"
"Where to?"
"One of the remote cabins needs fixing. It's right in the mountains, surrounded by nothing but wilderness. Hikers or outdoor enthusiasts usually book it, so it's crucial everything works perfectly there."
I weighed my options. Spending all day alone in bed or spending it alone with Gray. The decision practically made itself. I threw back the covers and got up.
"Give me a few minutes," I said, kissing him on my way to the bathroom.
Shortly after, dressed and in the kitchen, Gray had already packed provisions for the day into a bag and slid my breakfast across the counter to me, which I promptly sat on, ignoring the chairs on the other side as usual.
"I'll bring you Soraya's rubber boots in a moment," he informed me as soon as I had the first spoonful in my mouth.
"Rubber boots?"
"You'll need them. It's raining, the trails are muddy, and wet feet are the last thing you want today."
"Aren't we driving?"
Clearly, a memo had passed me by. Did he want to hike? Maybe I needed to reconsider my decision after all.
"No. We're taking the quads. They're nice in good weather, but when it rains…"
We would end up covered in mud from head to toe. "Isn't that prohibited?"
"Only if someone gets hurt, the quad gets stuck, or someone who shouldn't find out does find out. Which, admittedly, makes it even more thrilling."
I chewed on that for a few seconds before I finally nodded, feeling a faint surge of adrenaline. Maybe it was just what I needed—to hop on a quad, race along muddy paths, and forget all about how the constant rain had initially dampened my mood.
"When do we start?"
"Rubber boots, tools, quads. Anything else?" he listed, as if that was supposed to give me some idea of the timeframe.
I tilted my head. "How about I torture you with my taste on your tongue for the next few hours?"
That was certainly not the response he had expected. "If you hurry…"
To eat? To come? Whatever it is, I'd make it happen in record time.
"Yes, Daddy," I replied without a second thought.
Shit .
Oh shit.
When I had responded with Yes, sir some time ago, it had been somewhat justifiable, but what had just slipped out of my mouth now…
I froze. And I wasn't the only one, as Gray, too, had stopped dead in his tracks on his way out, his back turned toward me.
"Are you making fun of me, Amelia?"
What? Fuck. No — "Sure, when I want to tease my friends, I always call them Daddy ," I retorted, a bit too sarcastically.
How was I going to get out of this one?
"Is that so?"
"No!"
He turned around to face me, his expression unreadable. "Would you mind repeating that so I can be sure I understood you correctly?"
This was the worst possible moment for him to suddenly go deaf. I swallowed. My heart was pounding in my throat.
Had I just made a serious mistake that led him to immediately ask if I was feeling all right?
He looked at me expectantly. I recognized that look; it left me no choice but to obey his command.
"Yes, Daddy?" I repeated slowly, uncertain, a bit worried.
I had definitely read too many books lately and dreamed too much about Gray. I had imagined too many scenarios…
He took a step toward me. Once again, a curse was on the tip of my tongue.
"I… um." Heat rushed to my cheeks. "Are you uncomfortable with this?"
"No… it just caught me off guard. And that's rare." Gray moved closer, causing my pulse to finally spiral out of control. "Maybe I even like it."
"Maybe?"
"I'd need to hear it more often to be sure." His look suggested otherwise. He didn't need to hear it more because he had already decided that he liked it just as much as I did.
"Sure. A few trial runs, just to be absolutely sure." There was that sarcastic undertone again. By now, my heartbeat had calmed down, even though it still felt like I was on fire.
"As long as you only say it when we're alone."
"You know that sounds like a challenge to me, right? Maybe I should say it louder to make absolutely sure you like it…" Thoughtfully, I went back to my bowl of food, deliberately ignoring the fact that Gray had now propped himself up right in front of me on the kitchen island.
"How about you scream it for me when I come back? Then I'll let you know how much I like it."
I choked on my food. Why did I feel like I had just opened Pandora's box?
" Daddy's little sin . If that isn't just my cup of tea," he murmured as he pushed off from the counter and finally left me alone.
Not for long.
And with a slight shock that I needed to digest first.
It seemed like a foolish mistake on my part had just advanced the next step in my relationship with Gray.
Great, Amelia. How are you going to survive this? You're already soaking wet, and so far, it's just been damn words.
But that wasn't all that was going through my mind. My initial reaction to the words that had so easily slipped out concerned me. For an agonizingly long moment, I had believed that Gray would condemn it, even despise it, because there were so many people who would pass judgment on it, thinking it had something to do with me having daddy issues. Fundamentally, that couldn't have been further from the truth. Nor was it about any other irrational reason.
What really mattered was acknowledging Gray in his dominant role—as someone who cared for me, protected me, and looked after me—in a way that fulfilled me on all levels.
It had underscored the dynamics in which we operated. I willingly submitted… and for Gray, it was only natural to have control in his hands. Calling him sir or master , like I had with the word Daddy , would not be the same. Not only was the connotation entirely different, but also the tender, even perhaps affectionate, undertone was lost. The warmth behind it and the proof of how close I felt to him in this relationship.
Even if it wasn't official and we avoided talking about it. Somewhere, though, we were indeed on the same wavelength, and I was more than relieved that Gray recognized it for what it symbolized.
Namely, my affection.
I had dwelled on my thoughts for so long that Gray's return seemed all too sudden. In one hand, he carried two bright-turquoise rain boots, and in the other, the keys to the two ATVs.
I automatically stretched my legs over the edge. Without a word, Gray reached for my left leg, letting his hand glide from my calves down to my foot. "One side blue and the other yellow?" he asked, glancing at my other leg.
I nodded, followed by a wink. "You should try it sometime."
"Should I?"
Fixing my gaze on him, I watched as he pulled on the first boot, then reached for my second leg and repeated the process.
Then he grabbed my calves and jerked me forward to the edge, my legs already spread wide enough for him to fit easily between them.
Still, he did not stand up.
Instead, he gave me a challenging look. Just like earlier. And again, I had no choice but to obey his silent command. I supported myself on the surface and pushed upward so he could pull down my pants over the rubber boots. Thank goodness for stretchy fabric.
"Do you remember what I told you earlier?"
"That I should hurry up?"
When he looked at me that way, it wouldn't be long before I lost control over my body's reaction. Gray knew exactly how to use his tongue and fingers against me, and I lost every time. Or won, depending on how you looked at it.
"Yes. We have plans. Not that we should spend the night in a secluded cabin where you are completely at my mercy." He let his warm fingers slide up my bare legs until his hands circled my hips.
My breath caught in my lungs. "Aren't I already at your mercy here?"
"Up there, no one can hear you scream, sin."
This time, I had no choice but to close my eyes as his mouth found my center. Instantly, his tongue explored all the spots that sent warmth spreading through my entire body. It was scorching hot and so intense that I had to brace myself against the wood behind me to find some support.
I ran one hand through his hair, gripping it tightly, even though I didn't need to guide him or keep him in place. Gray already knew my body's responses by heart. He didn’t miss a single twitch or any of the sounds that escaped my lips as I was swept up in a rising spiral.
When his fingers joined his tongue, leisurely sliding into me and pressing against a sensitive spot, massaging it agonizingly slowly, my self-control was completely lost.
"Oh fuck, Daddy," I said with a gasp. "I can't… I… fuck. I need your cock inside me." It started in my soles and then shot through my entire body in a split second. Involuntarily, I wrapped my legs around Gray's head, pressing him against me as I came hard on his tongue.
Only when the last tremor had subsided did I slowly let him go.
With a dirty grin on his lips, he stood up, reached for my chin, and kissed me so I could taste myself on his tongue.
My hands moved toward his belt, but the disapproving sound from his throat stopped me. "That wasn't part of the deal, I'm afraid."
Though his rock-hard erection suggested otherwise.
"Please?"
"If you behave and later beg with the same desperate look, you'll get my cock. But only then, Amelia."
I withheld the protest rising within me, knowing that what awaited me later would be even better.