7. Eris
The energy in the car was different– stranger, quieter. The type of quietness that makes you notice everything, like the turn signal, the cars wheezing by or the sounds of brakes screeching behind you.
I’d never seen Maleek and Rayzor this quiet around each other before. They’re usually all smiles, jokes and talk. Their bond was undeniable. That’s why this was unsettling.
“Maleek, how’s school been? Making any friends?”
“Still got the same ones. I keep my circle tight, and school’s cool. I’m ready for it to be over, though.”
I nodded, raking my nail down the seatbelt material with one hand and holding Courtland’s hand with the other.
“Are you still doing basketball?”
“Trying to, but I wanna do something else.”
“Something else like what?” I asked, gazing out the window. Our city was beautiful at night. I could see why people wanted to come to Atlanta to pursue their dreams; the landscape and city lights alone will sell you dreams.
“Boxing,” he responded, and my head snapped toward Rayzor so fast.
He never took his eyes off the road, but I did see the tension in his jaw as it flexed.
I felt like I’d asked the wrong thing.
“He don’t know what the fuck he wanna do,” Rayzor said as we pulled up to a flat, level home with an Acura SUV in the driveway where a basketball goal set at the edge. The grass was healthy with flowers. Trees were sprouting. The lights shone through sheer curtains of the living room.
“I wanna box, I already told you,” Maleek said, getting out of the car just as the screen door flew open and Mrs. Kirkland walked out. Her hair bounced when she walked like always, even at night.
“Here we go with this shit,” Rayzor murmured, getting out of the car.
Maleek was halted in his tracks when Mrs. Kirkland faced him. Rayzor walked up, and I knew this wasn’t going to be a good exchange. It’s so strange how she treats him. I never saw her act like this in the office.
Rayzor and his momma’s relationship was rocky, and I always wondered why she acted like that towards her flesh and blood. I could never turn my back on Levi or Erin no matter what.
You could hear the muffled yelling. Rayzor’s hands went in the air.
His momma’s voice grew louder. I got out of the car to check things out.
I wasn’t trying to be nosy. I wanted to make sure it ain’t get ugly because Rayzor’s told me things about their relationship, and I wasn’t about to let her fuck with him.
“… he wasn’t supposed to be with you.” I heard her say.
“Is everything alright, baby?” I asked, looping my arm into Rayzor’s. “How are you doing, Mrs. Kirkland?”
She didn’t even look my way. It felt like she was ignoring me, which had me taken aback because this was the opposite of what I knew her to be. Mrs. Kirkland was always pleasant. Not overly nice, but cordial enough for our entire office to think she was a great mother from the care she gave Maleek.
“Oh, and you’re bringing strangers to my house,” she stated, blindsiding me.
“With all due respect, Mrs. Kirkland, I’m not a stranger. You know I’m Maleek’s hygienist.”
“Exactly. That’s business. I don’t know you from a can of paint despite years of service.”
“Don’t be talking to her like that, Ma. That’s rude as hell,” Maleek argued.
“You’re still a damn child who don’t know how to wipe your ass good, and you wanna keep taking up for people who don’t even take care of you. Maleek Yaris Kirkland, get the hell out of my sight before I say some hurtful things to you.”
“He’s right, though, Ma. That shit was wrong,” Rayzor added.
“This is my property. You’re already violating my verbal agreement; then you bring someone with you. I can say whatever the hell I want to.”
“Aye, I’m gone.” He grabbed my hand to leave.
“Don’t lose yourself loving him,” Mrs. Kirkland called out.
“Is a woman loving your son the worst thing though, Ma?”
Rayzor words did all but tremble. My heart broke for him. How could a mother say that to her child?
“It costs everything and then some. That’s why I’m trying to keep Maleek grounded.”
Rayzor turned around.
“You’re worrying about me being the worst thing that’s happened to Leek when you don’t even know the first fucking thing about him.”
“I know everything about my son.”
“Oh yeah? Did you know his ass was about to get into a truck today and Devin had to stop the shit? Where were you then?” he revealed.
Her eyes grew wide. Her breath was caught in her chest. She grabbed the sides of her pants with her fists. I could tell it was to refrain from seeming weak, but the revelation caught her by surprise.
“He what?” she recalled.
“Yeah, and ain’t no telling where the fuck he was about to go or do. Maleek ain’t the only one keeping secrets.”
“And what is that supposed to mean?”
“You are too. Ask that bald nigga in the suit why he knows so much about me. And better yet, you too.”
He helped me up into the truck, then walked around to the front of it to get in on his side. I let the window down.
“You don’t even know the man you’re lying with every night.”
“And I still love him, his past, demons and flaws.”
I swallowed.
“I don’t pretend to know everything about Courtland. I’m not gonna pretend I do. He’s layered, but that’s the beauty of it, and I choose to stand by and learn him.”
She shifted on her leg.
“And if ever loving him costs more than I’m willing to give, I know when to walk away. He knows that. You’re missing out on a great man you raised. The world loves him. I love him. And you should love him too. Take care, Mrs. Kirkland.”
Rayzor kissed the back of my hand and pulled away from the curb, leaving her there. I watched her silhouette fade as we got further down the street. I knew she wasn’t going to admit it; she’s stubborn like Rayzor. But the look in her eyes told me she’d heard every word.
The ride back to his house was a blur. I think we were both in our heads. Rayzor was the pillar of compressing feelings. It had something to do with his father’s passing. But I knew tonight was different. The heaviness was in the air.
“Are you alright, baby?”
“Yeah, baby, I’m good. You?”
“Don’t ask nothing you already know the answers to.”
“How can she just treat you like that? Mrs. Kirkland is always so well-rounded and nice at the office.”
“She was once nice with me too until shit changed.”
“Sorry if I intruded.”
“You stood by ya man. Ain’t shit to apologize about. If anything, I need to apologize for putting you close to that shit.”
“I did what I wanted. If I didn’t want to go, I could’ve stayed back.”
He leaned over the console. “And that’s why I love you.” He kissed me.
We walked into the house hand in hand. The house wasn’t as loud, and the TV was on. Both kids were on the couch with Suki, and City was seated in the chair. They were watching a movie.
“Ma,” Levi called out, but stayed under Suki.
I sat next to them.
“Y’all took a bath?” I asked the kids.
“Yep. City bathe Levi, and I took my shower.”
“And, girl, they’ve been hanging on since. Levi keeps dozing off,” Suki joked.
“Nun uh. I’m up,” Levi argued back.
“Uh huh, that’s what your mouth say, but you were just snoring,” Erin added.
“Shut up,” he told her.
“Not tonight y’all,” I warned.
Rayzor walked in.
City looked back.
“Nigga, you aiight?” City asked.
“Nigga, watch your mouth in front of my kids.”
“How you gon’ say the same shit and ask me to watch my mouth.”
Rayzor ignored him.
“Baby, come here for a second.”
I was confused because he looked like something was bothering him. Maybe he wanted to talk about the incident with his momma, maybe he needed my help with something, or maybe he wanted me close. Whatever it was, it had him tense.
He grabbed my left hand. “You know I love you, right?”
“You alright, baby?”
“Yeah, baby, I’m good. You?”
“Don’t lie to me.”
He gave a handsome, devilish, closed-lip smile. “I’m good for real.”
“Courtland.”
He took my hands into his and kissed the back of it.
“You know you stuck with me, right?”
I playfully rolled my eyes. “Nope.”
“The woman I love finally met the woman that hates me. Shit, I think it’s time we lock in.”
He pulled out a small, square, matte black box, but it looked heavy.
I reached out and ran my hand across the material, not knowing what to do with my hands.
“It feels so rich.” I sniffed.
“Bitch, is that a…?” Suki jumped up with her phone out.
“Nah, my boy ‘bout to do it, ainna?”
My heart thumped hard against my chest.
“Courtland, are you…”
“Eris, you know I love you. I told you that you’d be my wife since day one, and I meant that shit. You make me better. The kids make me better. Our love makes a nigga feel good. I’ve been wanting to do this, but you know you wasn’t fucking with me too tough. Made me yearn. I love that shit though.”
I laughed between tears.
“Will you do me the honor of marrying me? Make this half a whole with me, you and the kids.”
He opened the box, and in Oxford blood silk material embodied in a C & E in gold, shining brightly behind the small crystal light bedded the brightest rock I’d ever seen. My mouth dropped, and my hands trembled as I glanced between him and the box.
“I need some shades from the glare,” Suki said. “I know that’s the fuck right. My girl deserves the biggest, largest!”
“My boy does big shit, so you know E was gon’ get nothing but the best,” City added.
“My God,” I gasped.
My knees buckled.
“Baby, hold on now. Don’t fall out yet. You gotta give me an answer.” He smiled.
“Yes!” I blurted.
He slipped the ring on my finger. It was heavy. He picked me up, spinning me around. I looked at the new home for where my ring lay and couldn’t believe my eyes.
“Thank you, baby. Thank you for loving me—everything that comes with me.”
“I love you with my eyes and heart open. I wouldn’t want to do this life with nobody else but you.”
A tear slowly escaped his eye. It made my heart smile. It did something to me as I wiped it away.
A smile creased his beautiful cheek.
“I love you so much. Thank you for wanting to make me your wife.”
He kissed me hard as we shared the most passionate kiss.
The kids ran up and threw their arms around us.