17. City
One minute we’re in New York celebrating my boy’s W, the next we’re back home sitting in the middle of a missing-person investigation for Levi. Life was constantly changing, but fuck, not like this. This was a lil’ too heavy.
All I could think about was the last time I’d seen Levi, which was the day we all left for New York. We played with a few of his toy trucks and dinosaurs. He had random conversations, jumping all over the place. Normal kid shit. That was it.
We dropped him off at Rhea’s, and Erin’s to her friends and got on the P.J. Everything was good. Now, he was missing. Some shit wasn’t adding up. It could just be me, but kids don’t just go missing like that.
After leaving Rhea’s, I was in the streets. The police weren’t saying shit I liked to hear, and I could cover more ground than them because they had protocols. They weren’t making Levi a priority fast enough.
I searched the neighborhood and talked with some people while the police went in and out of Rhea’s house.
They all said the same thing. He was playing with a kickball in the front yard.
A few of the mothers let their kids play with Levi and Erin over the years, so they weren’t strangers.
They knew Eris because of Rhea and spoke highly of her and how she was with the kids.
That’s one thing Eris kept saying: Levi knew not to talk to strangers.
While she was trying not to fall apart, Rayzor held it together.
My boy was hurting. You could see it in his eyes.
I knew he wasn’t all the way there. He checked out and went into beast mode.
I’ve seen that look before. He was making moves while the police were there.
They didn’t know it. That was a good thing too, because if they knew how much blood was about to be shed, they would’ve needed to save their resources and energy.
After all, we were about to give the city something to do until Levi was home.
It was after midnight when I paused for the night.
I went by Rhea’s, grabbed Suki and brought her back to my spot.
With everything going on, I didn’t want her by herself.
She wasn’t moving without me. She liked that independent shit, but we were all about to depend on each other until this is sorted out.
I’ve seen her cry more than I had before. She loved Levi. She loved Eris. That’s why it hurt her that this was happening because, like everyone else, she thought everyone was safe. I can’t lie, thinking about what happened to Levi made me realize that it could happen to her too.
In New York, I booked us a ferry ride to the Statue of Liberty to spend some time together after being there for Rayzor and Eris the last couple of days.
We hit up Hudson Yards too. She loved that shit, knocking down LV and Dior in one swipe.
She said she didn’t wanna do too much damage to my pockets, but I had to show her I had unlimited bread.
We did a couple spots to eat, laughed, talked, and kicked it.
Somewhere in the middle of the night, I got up to take a shower because we had fallen asleep. I didn’t want to fuck her sleep up, so I let her stay.
“Morning. You hungry?”
“No,” she answered, checking her phone that she slept with.
“You gotta eat.”
“I just wanna get over there to E.”
“I know, but you gotta eat if you’re trying to be there for her. Ain’t no telling what we’re about to walk in on over there.”
Last night, I put her bags on her side of the bed, so it’d be easy when she woke up.
She pushed off the edge of the bed, roughly rummaged through the bags and pulled out what she needed before she locked herself in the bathroom. I hoped she had the energy to face this new day because she was stirring and talking in her sleep all night. This shit was fucking with her bad.
The Uber Eats order was delivered a couple of minutes later.
I got up to get it, feeling heavy myself.
Suki came out thirty minutes later with her hair in a bun, a tracksuit, and a pair of UGG slippers. She quietly sat at the table. We stared at each other for a second.
“Eat, Suk.”
She grabbed a scoop of eggs.
“Thank you.”
“I got you.”
She moved food around on her plate in deep thought.
“I didn’t even mean to fall asleep.”
“Shit, you were tired.”
“I’m worse now than last night. Did I sleep badly?”
“Besides tossing and turning, nah, it wasn’t that bad. Oh, and the snoring.”
She threw a hash brown round at me, and I caught it in my mouth.
“You a damn lie. I don’t snore.”
“The hell you don’t. I thought a fuckin’ grizzly got in bed with me.”
She laughed.
That shit made me smile because it’s been dark around here for the last twenty-four hours.
Sitting across from her, despite what was going on, I liked waking up and having breakfast with her.
It felt natural. Seeing her bags over at the house too made the room seem bigger and fuller.
I often didn’t sit at the table. I’m usually in the living room.
It was nice having someone to look at on the other side of the table.
“I’m thinking,” I broke the silence.
She threw her hands up. “Oh Lord, he’s thinking.”
That reminded me of the same comment my mama made.
“Fuck you mean?”
“Nothing.” She gave a closed-lip smile. “Go ahead.”
“I mean, this shit might be coming at a bad time.”
“What is it, City?”
“Since we’ve been kicking it and shit like that, how about we move forward?”
“As in what?” she asked.
“Like us being together.”
“A relationship?”
“Yeah, a relationship, Suk. Damn, you can’t figure that out?”
“You sure that’s what you want?”
“I’m sure it’s what I need. I like this balance we got going on.”
She smirked. “Let me find out I’m the biggest.”
“The largest.”
“Okay, but you gotta ask me again.”
I went around to her side and scooted into the seat next to her. I grabbed her hand. “Suki, I like ya, and I want ya.” I joked.
She giggled bashfully.
“So, can we give this shit a try? Wanna be my ole’ lady?”
She leaped at me, throwing her arms around my neck.
“Of course I will, because you know niggas don’t play ‘bout their ole’ ladies.” She giggled.
With everything going on, we agreed not to tell our people yet.
They’ll find out how they find out. I wasn’t ready to hear what that foolish shit sounded like out loud.
I was already feeling it on the inside. Maybe a nigga was scared, but I knew that sooner or later we were going to take shit there.
I ate breakfast, then ate her on top of the table.
That relationship shit must’ve unlocked something.
I don’t even eat pussy like that. Maybe a few times before, but I wanted to do it to her.
She made a puddle underneath her asscheeks.
Suki had been inside my fucking head for too long.
Shit, it seemed right to lock her ass down.
When I took her to the bedroom, she was breathing heavier than a mothafucka. I gazed down at her, thinking about the shift. One minute we were arguing, the next we were grieving, and now, we were finally together. None of our shit was orthodox. I liked that about us.
She begged for me as I went into her raw. She begged for me to take it slow, but shit, we’d been taking things slow long enough. This pussy came without limits now. It even felt different than before. Suki even looked at me different too.
Afterward, she lay on my chest. Her breathing calmed as we passed a blunt back and forth. Neither of us said shit. I think we were both in our heads. The atmosphere was different– calmer. Peaceful. We’d made a crazy ass commitment but fuck it. What’s the worst that could happen?
* * *
We had to check in with security to get clearance to enter the fucking gate. They had that mothafucka locked down like Fort Benning. I don’t blame him after everything that went down.
Rayzor met us at the door. He and Suki hugged and he sent her inside the house.
“Any word on Levi?”
“Hell nah, and this shit about to make me lose it. I wanna leave but wanted to wait until you and Suki got here.”
My boy looked like he had a rough night. His eyes were low and red. He was clean, in different clothes than yesterday, but yesterday was still on him in a different way. His voice was dry.
“Shit, she’s here now. I’m ready when you are,” I said.
“I need to get Levi home. Whenever I find the mothafucka that did this, they gon’ wish death found them before I did.”