Chapter 15 Rayzor #2
“E, my ass. Are you in the streets or not Courtland?”
“You think boxing got me where I’m at?”
“And you have me and my family around you? I have a fucking career that could’ve gotten thrown away if I got caught with you!”
“You think I’ll let that shit happen?”
“But it did, Rayzor, with the cop that pulled you over. What if that had gone differently?”
“It wouldn’t. I ain’t no fucking rookie, E.”
“Oh, so you’re Scarface now?”
“I’m me. I ain’t trying to be nobody else.”
“You’re the face of boxing and you wanna sell drugs and throw all that shit away. Mess up your legacy, your father…”
“Don’t fucking bring him up. You don’t know shit about my Pops.”
“I know he’d be ashamed if he knew you were throwing away something that’s lifechanging. You know what, you’re grown, Rayzor and I’m not about to change your mind on shit. All I know is… I can’t be with a man like you, and I won’t so–”
“I’ve kept you safe all this time. What I do when I ain’t with you ain’t on you.”
“But it is. You’re too fucking blind to see it. Is that why that cop let us go when he pulled us over? Does he know you sell too?”
I ran my hand down my face. “You’re worried about the wrong shit.”
She slowly nodded in disbelief.
I kept a low profile, it wasn’t a secret to the city. Boxing and my street shit never came together. I made sure to keep shit separate.
“Right. You’re legit selling drugs while being the face of a brand. You can throw it away, but I’m not about to watch you do it.”
She went and stood at the edge of the street, waving her hand up and down like this was New York. Out of nowhere, a cab slowly pulled to the edge of the curb. That shit blew me.
“Fuck you going?”
“Home.”
“We gotta talk about this shit.”
“Are you going to stop?”
My gaze fell on the ground then back up at her.
“Exactly.” She paused. “So, leave this where it is.”
“I love you though, E. Don’t that shit count for something?”
“Love me enough to let me go since you’re choosing the streets over the ones you call family.”
“Damn, what you want me to say?”
Tears streamed down her face. That shit broke me.
“Nothing. I think you said enough.” She slipped into the backseat of the cab. “Bye, Rayzor.”
I wanted to run after her, but the witnesses and cameras were out.
“Man, fuck!” I cursed seeing her drive away.
My pride wouldn’t let me.
That shit killed me a little.
I ain’t slept in days. Been doing everything to get Eris back: stopping by, messaging and some more shit, but she wasn’t having it. Even blocked me. I missed my baby, man.
I talk to the kids, trying to keep shit steady, but it fucked with me. Not seeing all of them had me on edge. That’s my calm, my peace. Sanity.
The blogs had videos of the shit with us. Luckily, nobody the words, so it’s painted as we had a big blow up about me fucking around. I’d let them have that for now and address it when the time is right. This shit didn’t have to be like this.
My manager was on my ass. He was trying to save the brands, but the shit I wanted to save most was my relationship. Fuck everything else.
So, since I couldn’t sleep, it gave me time to do shit. I was running on wild nigga impulse and Gooch reaped the benefits from it. After all, it’s his fucking fault.
“Man, I’m not trying to take out of anyone’s mouth. I’m trying to find the nigga that hit me,” Gooch pleaded as he laid naked as fuck on a tarp.
I gripped him by the neck, palm pressing into his windpipe, thinking about how he fucked up my night a few days ago and how it’s been hard for me to shake back. I wasn’t sleeping, eating or none of that shit, just crashing the fuck out.
“You knew what time it was when you approached ‘em. You know he ain’t wrapped tight, Gooch,” City chastised with laughter.
“Now, tell me again how you got hit because ain’t nobody talking.”
“I got a call in the middle of the night that one of my houses were hit and they took it all, man. Damn, ain’t nobody lying,” he cried, tears streaming down the sides of his face, fading into the green tarp.
“It’s been a couple days now, nigga. You ain’t bounced back but you got time to take your bitch out.”
“My stash that I paid y’all with was hit. I had my own at home.”
Pressing deeper, he choked and fought to stay alive.
“You got bread at home so why the fuck ain’t it in my pocket?”
City pushed me back a bit, giving him time to breathe.
“Shit, we can’t get nothing if his ass dead,” City said.
We both looked at each other, then City chuckled.
“I’m tripping. I can fuck his bitch and get it all.” City shook his head.
“I got it, but I don’t have it to give to y’all. Everything tied up in investments.”
“You moving like a boss but ain’t got my quarter mill.”
“Give me two days. I’ll move some shit around. You can’t kill me if you want it, Rayzor, damn. I’ve always been straight with y’all. Never late. And if I didn’t have it, I don’t come around. Come on, man.”
Looking at this nigga further pissed me off. I twisted his neck, feeling and hearing it break in several places. His body went lax in my arms– weight heavier than before.
I felt his soul slip away then dropped his lifeless body before standing.
“Get my fuckin’ money,” I told City, walking away.
Gooch could’ve lived, but he’d already done too much damage.
He had to see me for that. It wasn’t his fault I was in the streets, but he knew protocol, and he put his wants before my needs.
I needed my peace– Eris. He fucked that up for me, so I fucked up that for his wife and family. My loss was everyone else’s, too.
I dropped what I was doing to stop by Maleek and mama’s crib. He texted me while on the bus and said he was having an issue. I wasn’t sure what kind of issue but whatever it was would get handled.
Meeting him at the bus stop, he stood there with a huge lip and a knot on his eyebrow like he’d been in a fight. I pushed away from my truck to him. He had his head down. That shit did something inside me. I was seeing red.
“Who the fuck did this shit?” I asked him.
“It’s nothing, bro.”
“Nah, it’s something because you hit my line.”
“The boy on the bus Jayshon did it” one of his friends said, pointing to a heavyset nigga looking out the window with his friends.
The bus tried pulling off, and I stopped that mothafucka, stepping out in front of it. I signaled for the doors to open back up and hopped my ass on it.
“Sir, you can’t get on here,” the driver said.
I ignored her.
Kids were touching on me, trying to ask for autographs and snapping pictures.
“Aye, get the fuck off the bus,” I told the boy who was now scrunched up in his seat, lump bobbing in his throat.
His face was swollen although he already looked like a fucking squirrel. Maleek put them paws on his ass. His eye was already closing shut. He was sucking up the blood inside his mouth, knots on both sides of his forehead.
That wasn’t good enough for me.
I saw his phone, snatched it off the seat and went through it. The first number I saw was ‘dad’. I called the number.
“What the hell you want, Jay? You bet not had to miss that fuckin’ bus,” he fussed.
“Aye, if you want your kid shit, come get it.” I ended the call and slipped the phone into my pocket.
“My phone!” he cried for it.
“Yo’ daddy can come get this shit back,” I let him know, turning around on the crowded ass bus that had a circled around me. I broke through and got off the bus.
The bus driver yelled for me to give back the phone.
Fuck them, too.
“Fuck you waiting on, get them kids home,” I told her, and she apprehensively closed the doors.
Maleek had gotten inside the truck, but I was posted because I wanted to see this lil’ mothafucka’s Pops. I’m getting my ones. Since the lil’ nigga was too young, his Pops can take these hits.
The phone went off in my pocket. I knew it was him.
“Hello. Hello,” he repeated.
“I ain’t got all day. If you want this mothafucka back. Come get it in blood. Yo’ son know where.” I ended the call.
Maleek sat in the truck, I stayed posted.
Minutes later, a Chevy Malibu bent the block on two wheels, almost passing us. He had to reverse that bitch. Almost jumped out with it still rolling.
He pushed his phone to his ear, and the phone rang in my pocket as he called it to see where it was. Once he noticed I had it, he sped walk with air on his chest. I was gone deflate it.
He looked familiar.
His son wobbled his ass out the car fiddling with his thumbs. I bet he didn’t have that energy with Maleek earlier. Bullying ass mothafuckin’ kids.
He reached out towards me. “Let me get that phone up off you, Rayzor.”
“Who you?”
He scoffed.
“Yeah, I’m Chip. I get my work from you and City.”
“Hell yeah.” I snapped my finger once it clicked but fuck this nigga. When I snapped out, hitting him in his shit, I knocked him off his square. He regained control but wasn’t quick enough with that weak ass punch.
I picked his ass up, slamming him on the concrete.
“Daddy!” Jayshon cried.
“Let this be a lesson lil’ nigga. Every mistake somebody gotta pay them consequences. You fucked with Leek, this ass whooping on you.”
I punched his face in, almost sending his head through the pavement.
After that, I took the phone out my pocket, dropping it on his chest. His face was covered in blood as he laid sleep. He’ll come too sooner or later.
“Leek!” I called out.
His feet shuffled behind me.
“You got something you wanna say to my brother, Jayshon?”
“My bad about…”
“Nah, be a man when you holding your own. Come over here.”
“Court, it’s cool. I already beat his ass.”
Jayshon shuffled slowly, scared to leave his Pops since his ass wasn’t waking up.
“Now, what you need to say to bro?” I said.
“My bad what I did,” Jayshon mumbled.
Maleek held his head high.
“Aye, let your Pops know y’all had your last meal on me,” I warned him.
We got inside the truck, leaving Jayshon to try and peel his Pops off the ground. That lesson better stay with him for a lifetime because he’ll cause his family a world of hurt if he fucked with the one wrong. I took it light on his Pops when he could’ve been in a funeral home.
When we pulled up towards the crib, mama was outside her house waiting.
She banged on the hood.
“Maleek, get out.”
I barely stopped the truck.
“Didn’t I tell you to stay away from him?” she scolded me.
I let my window down. “He fuckin’ called me.”
“I don’t give a damn what he did. You’re not allow–”
“Ma, I called him,” Maleek vouched.
She rushed over to his side of the truck, yanking the door open. “See what the hell you do? Why is his face like that?”
“Ma, this isn’t Court’s fault.”
“Yes it is,” she argued. “You’ve hanging with your thug of a damn brother. You’re not a fighter.”
“I ain’t got shit to do with this.”
“Yes, you do because you’ve been sneaking around here seeing him when I told you to leave us alone. Why don’t you listen?”
“Ma, stop. Court didn’t do nothing. A boy tried to jump me on the bus.”
“Go in the house.”
“Damn, stop yelling at him and shit.”
“Maleek, say bye to your brother because you won’t be seeing him again. We’re moving.” Her glare focused on me, eyes shifting. Anger lounged in the pupils.
“Fuck you mean y’all moving?”
“Ma, I don’t want to move.”
“I’m the adult, Maleek,” she fussed. “Didn’t I tell you to go in the house?”
“I’m moving to keep you away from us. I don’t know what kind of trouble you’ve brought around here, but I have to protect me and my son.”
“Oh, and I ain’t your son?”
“You haven’t been in a long time.”
The silence was deafening.
Her words slapped me in the chest.
Cars rolled down the street behind us.
“Leave before I call the police like I should’ve done in the first fucking place,” she threatened.
“Damn, you gon’ do this shit to me? Take my fuckin’ brother away from me when I ain’t done shit.”
“It’s life. You took my husband away from me, why should you be happy?”
That pain in my chest.
She’s said that shit time and time again, it never got easier to hear. She blamed me ever since his death. At first, she didn’t verbalize it. Then her hate for me grew overnight and this where we’re at.
“You don’t believe that shit. If anything, I tried saving Pop.”
She slowly titled her phone to her ear. “Like I said, get the hell off my property.”
“Ma, why the fuck you be on this hateful ass shit?” I asked.
“911, what’s the address of the emergency?” the operator came through her line.
The fucking wind was knocked outta me.
“And leave that girl alone that you’ve been parading around here. You’re going to end her in a world of trouble because men like you don’t know how to love. You cause pain.”
All I could do was back away, gaze still on her.
That’s how the woman that fucking birthed me treated me. Made me seem like the bad guy when I ain’t done shit but loved her.
My first heartbreak was Pop’s death, then her after she nursed me back to health and the policy money was spent. She ain’t loved me the same. I’ve been alone since the day we put Pops in the dirt.