Chapter 19 Suki
“Your girl got my boy head fucked up,” City said, toying with my nipple.
My leg rested across his as we laid wrapped in the sheets from wildly fucking. He turned me every way from Sunday. I needed that with me being gone off that liquor.
“I see. Rayzor loves my girl. Eris is one of the good ones.” I smirked.
“Y’all got some more like her then?” City asked, sending my mouth flying open.
I knew Eris was doing whatever she could to keep Rayzor off her mind tonight, but she couldn’t shake him. I loved how they loved each other, but I wanted Eris’ mind to be right when dealing with him.
Men were fucking gross sometimes, and I didn’t want her going down that dark hole behind another nigga.
“You give that dick to anybody. You’re not looking for a good girl. A good hoe maybe.”
“Yeah, you right. That’s why we here, ain’t it?”
“Nah, we’re here because I was tipsy and wanted dick. You have plenty to provide. But make no mistake, boo, I’m a hoe, just not yo’ hoe.”
I was getting up from his bed when he reached out, and wrapped his arms around me.
I hated that I was always in limbo with City.
I stay away as much as possible, but when that itch can’t get scratched, I get it on my own.
Tonight, I needed it, and he must’ve felt me thinking about him because he called me as I was leaving the club. Even came and got me too.
He fucked the lace front off me. Our bodies were drenched. There were scratches and marks from my neck down to my inner thighs. We fucked rough. Never wanting our feelings to be misinterpreted.
“Why you always saying dumb shit, Suk?”
“I’m saying what we both feel. You just called me a hoe.”
He didn’t respond. Only laid back against the pillow, staring up at the ceiling.
“You gon’ take me home? I have something to do in a few hours and need to take my ass to sleep.”
“Hell nah, stay here.”
My heart paced.
“But you know that’s not what we do,” I said, side eyeing him.
“I ain’t through getting the pussy. Why the fuck you runnin’ like you’re getting caught or some shit?”
I’ve never stayed the night with City. I had rules. Never sleep in a nigga’s bed that wasn’t mine. Don’t get me wrong, I’ve broken my rules, not for City though.
We sat in a heavy silence.
He pushed up from the pillow against the headboard. He pulled the blunt from the nightstand, lighting it. The flame’s rays illuminated his face. Devilish behind orangish flame. When the smoke expended in the air, I saw exactly who the nigga was.
Hell on Earth.
He passed the blunt after a few drags.
“You know… I thought we were gon’ be on some legit shit. You be dodging me and shit, only hitting a nigga for the dick. I thought I was going to have your ass ditzy like these other hoes.”
“That’s the difference. I’m one of one.”
He nodded, staring ahead.
“Don’t tell me you’re letting little big ole’ me bother you?”
“I can’t lie. It does fuck with my head and shit ‘cause you’re my best gobbler and don’t be even hitting a nigga line like that,” he confessed.
“I tend to have that effect.”
He chuckled with his fist up to his mouth.
Out of nowhere, he wrapped his hand around my throat.
“You out here sucking other niggas’ dicks?”
My gaze flickered around him as a smile formed wide.
“And do.”
His eyes were dark like something possessed him.
He let me go with force.
“You out here giving yours away like two for twenty and you mad at me for what I do when you’re not even my nigga? Yeah, fuck you, City.”
“I’ll cut your fuckin’ throat out. Now how you gon suck dick then?”
“Long as you leave these lips and tongue I’ll be just fine.”
“Bitch. I’ll put a grenade in it and blow all yo’ shit up.”
“And that’s okay because RIP to a fallen soldier. Somebody gone cry at my funeral. That’s how powerful my shit is.”
The only thing he could do was watch me in awe.
“Man, take yo’ throat goat ass to sleep before I stick some in it.”
I giggled while closing my eyes because City didn’t know I wasn’t the one to fuck with.
Seeing my daddy’s Lexus ES 350 and my momma’s Toyota Highlander that daddy gifted her for her birthday sitting in the driveway followed by a Benz and a BMW belonging to my older brother and sister made me let out a heavy breath.
I had to take me a good shot from my Patron bottle because it was about to be a time; good or bad.
“Alright, bitch, get it together and don’t let them fuck up your mood,” I coached myself.
I wish it was Saturday already because Eris was coming up to join me for my parents’ anniversary party weekend. I’ve been dreading this day forever. It shouldn’t feel like walking on pins and needles around family, but here we are.
As soon as I stepped out the car, my mama was coming out with a margarita glass in her hand.
“I told y’all it’s Sam. The only one that plays that loud ass music.”
It’s already starting.
After adjusting my clothes, I met her on the front porch as the rest of the clan followed along.
We were all going inside the house, why the fuck were all eyes on me?
If these were different people and different times, I’d welcome the show, but my family needed to check the temperature before getting on my nerves.
“It’s Suki, Ma. Hey, how you doing?” I hugged her.
She leaned back. “Ouuu, I see you took those long ropey things out your head.” She ignored my comment, but she heard what I said.
I released her, giving my brother a quick hug.
“Sam.”
I ran to daddy’s arms.
“Hey, Daddy.”
I melted in his embrace as I inhaled his cologne. He was always inviting and calm. Not like the rest of my family.
When I got to my sister, she acted like it was a disease to touch me. I didn’t even bother as I went in the house. It was always something with her. She always thought I was the black sheep of the family.
Inside my parents’ two-story home there were portraits, trophies, certificates, licenses and more surrounding the walls of the family. When life was good with us.
We all went to the family room. I took a seat on the recliner, seated away from everyone.
“I wasn’t even sure if you’d come down this weekend. I said it to daddy,” my sister Joyce announced.
“Why wouldn’t I come when I told you I would?”
“Sam, don’t start that now. We’re here to celebrate Ma and Pa,” my brother William said.
“It’s Sukiana. Y’all know this.” I exhaled. “Don’t start this alright. We’re here for them, not me.”
“I don’t care what you changed your name to, you’ll always be Sam. Sukiana is so damn ghetto.”
I changed my name the moment I legally could because I fucking hated my original.
My parents hated that I did it, but it was the best decision I made with starting my own life.
It felt like my original was cursed. Being Suki gave me liberation and got me from under my family’s thumb.
I’ve done so much that I was proud of with my name, and they could never make me feel bad about it.
“It’s Suki. Let’s enjoy her time with us. She doesn’t come home often,” Daddy voiced.
Out of everyone, daddy always had my back. I usually only call him and no one else back home. My life was drama and judgement free without them in it. I’m the only one that makes messes in my life and judge me for it.
“Thank you, daddy,” I mouthed.
He winked at me.
I prayed he stayed by my side and Eris got here soon because this was going to be one-hell of a weekend, and I didn’t feel like going to jail.
“Heyyyy, girl, I’m so glad you’re here.” I hugged Eris the moment she got in the car.
“You know I got you just like you got me.” She paused. “Tell me what’s going on.”
I didn’t even want to relive last night’s bullshit.
It started with me telling my family I got me a hotel room because I didn’t want to stay there. With the house having DJ’s wife and three kids and Joyce’s husband and my nephew, we were on top of each other. Our parents’ house was large, but not big enough to let bullshit slide.
“Girl, that’s so damn crazy. Thankfully, you don’t have long.”
“I’m getting the hell out of here on the first thing smoking. Hell, I might change my flight to get outta here after the party.”
“I’m with you, however you wanna do it.”
“Thank you, girl. Between you and my daddy, that’s the only support I have.”
It was messed up I felt like an outsider with the same people I grew up with. It’s been that way for years. Nothing I ever did made nobody happy, except daddy. That’s why I cut ties and stay away.
When we arrived back at my parents’, everyone was having brunch in the backyard from the caterers I hired. It’s been set up months ago. It was part of my gift to them.
“It smells so good. I hope it’s still some food left because I had to fight with Levi to get him to my cousins and missed breakfast. Then the airport was too busy. I just wanted to get on the plane,” Eris complained as we got out the car.
“What my girl Erin do?”
“Nothing. You know she don’t pay anybody no mind with that phone in her hands.”
I giggled because Erin was a younger version of Eris.
It’s crazy to see how much they act and look alike.
I applaud Eris so much for handling two kids like that.
Whenever I think about kids, I get sick.
That’s why I send them back speed dial whenever God wanted to get to acting funny and send me one.
“Eris, how nice it is to see you. I just asked about you last night,” my momma greeted her with the largest smile and hug.
“How are you doing, Ms. Joy? Happy Anniversary,” Eris greeted.
My daddy hugged her, my sister waved, and Derrick gave a head nod in his condescending manner.
The backyard was lively.
The kids ran wild, music blasted and food looked good. Everyone was enjoying themselves.
We joined them and I quickly had two mimosas waiting for me.
I was happy when they didn’t ask or say anything to me while I ate and drank. I watched the kids play, caterers get all the food and drinks together, and my parents were dancing in the middle of the yard before my siblings and their spouses joined.