Chapter 28
Emma
"Woah," is all I can say.
Stephanie puts her phone down, we've watched the video three times already.
"I can't believe he admitted all that… When did this post?" I ask.
"A couple of hours ago. Em, you're trending. Everyone's posting shit about owning their sexuality, being all empowered, blah blah blah. Hashtag SexLikeEmma has been reposted like 10,000 times already."
"Oh, sweetie! You're a revolutionary!" Mom says in a high-pitched voice, patting my shoulder aggressively.
I'm so confused. "So, what… He tells the world I had a threesome with him and Stetson and all is forgiven?"
"Well, sweetie, it's not their place to forgive, because, like your boyfriend pointed out, it's no one's business but yours. But maybe this will make things less… mean?"
She pats my back, then gets up. "I need to get dinner going, are you girls going to help?" She asks, leaving the room without waiting for an answer.
Stephanie gets up, but turns to me before leaving. "Look, you're right. It's a shit hand. Buuuut, he just gave you everything back."
"He didn't give me everything back, how can you say that? There's still a naked picture of me out there!"
"I know. And that's awful. It's invasive, and I can't imagine what you're feeling. But he didn't share that picture, and that post he just sent out to millions of people will hopefully help mitigate the damage. What's done is done. So, what are you going to do about it? Besides, now you get to be you. My sexpot sister, who'd have thought?" She winks before heading downstairs.
I've barely left this room in days. Boxes and bags of all my things are stuffed around me.
"Huh," I express to an empty room.
Eventually, I get up, still unsure what to do about my life. One thing I do know, becoming more apparent, more clawingly urgent as every second passes: I need to see Rafi.
At nearly 2 pm, two hours since I watched the video, I'm not sure I can make it through dinner without calling him. He was supposed to be here with me. I'm chopping potatoes, getting them ready to boil, when the doorbell rings.
My dad hops up out of his recliner and answers the door.
"Were you expecting someone else?" I ask my mom. Stephanie's boyfriend, Adam, got here an hour ago, and he's just as pretentious as she described. Everything mom makes, he adds commentary. 'Green beans? You know, Haricot Vert make an excellent alternative.' 'You know, if you leave the skin on your potatoes, they retain a lot more nutritional value.' This earned him a dramatic eye roll, which he conveniently missed when Stephanie dragged him into the living room to watch football with our father.
I keep chopping skinned potatoes when I hear my name.
"Emma." His voice is deep and warm. I don't know how I've gone so long without him. I don't know how I didn't realize how irritable, empty, and hollow I felt without him.
I've yet to look up, but my knife hovers over the vegetable. I see my mom out of the corner of my eye leave the kitchen, and we're alone.
"Emma," he says again, his voice raw. I look up this time and am taken aback. I thought I saw a hint of exhaustion on the video, but in person, it's so much more apparent. The near bruises from lack of sleep under his eyes made all the more prominent by his golden tone skin. He even looks like he's lost weight. He's supposed to fight tomorrow. What was he thinking?
I move around the counter until I'm standing in front of him. His dark eyes are glistening, his expression clouded, hair mussed, like he’s run his fingers through it a thousand times.
"Did you see the video?"
My mouth tugs into a half-smile, and I bite my lip. "You mean, the one where you told the world I had a threesome with you and Stetson?"
He doesn't laugh. "Are you mad?"
"No! No, not at all. I'm sorry, I didn't mean for that to sound ungrateful. Thank you for the video. You didn't have to do that."
"I would have done it sooner, but I didn't want Tina to run, we had to serve her papers and get the report filed before I posted. Emma… I'm so fucking sorry. I'm so sorry. I'm so sorry." His desperation is evident, bared raw before me in his glassy eyes, furrowed brow, and tense, pursed lips.
I don't think before jumping up into his arms. He reacts quickly, wrapping his arms around me, squeezing me tight. "It isn't your fault. It was never your fault. I'm sorry I blamed you. I was just overwhelmed. I didn't know how to deal with it all."
"I know. Next time, we'll deal with things together."
"I hope there isn't a next time," I admit.
"Me too. I just mean, if things get rocky, in any way… we can do this together. Are you with me, Emma?"
"I'm with you. I love you so much. I missed you so fucking much, Rafi."
He releases me from our hug, then lowers down to the ground. My eyebrows scrunch together in confusion, until I realize what he's doing.
He's on one knee.
He reaches into his pocket and pulls out a box.
"Oh my god," I whisper, covering my mouth, and he looks up at me, eyes glistening.
"Emma. I've loved you for years. You're the best thing that's ever happened to me. I want to take care of you, support you, and be there for you every second of the day. I want to listen to your dreams and stories and ideas, and I want to make love to you, and I want to fuck you, and, more than anything, I want to be your husband. Will you be my wife?" He flips the box open.
I release a sharp intake of breath. "Are… are you sure?" I ask. He needs to be sure.
There's a slight tic in his brow. "Babe." It's all he says, and it's infused with admonishment.
I start laughing, and he stands, wrapping his arms around me, underneath my shoulders, lifting me up high. I wrap my legs around his waist and look down at his face. "Rafi. Raze. I would love to be your wife. Will you be my husband?"
"Fuck yes," he whispers, and then his lips are on mine. He devours me, but before we can get too carried away, my mother's high-pitched squealing carries in from the background, followed by loud cheers from my sister and father. We end the kiss, and I hide my face in his neck.
He chuckles at our public display and releases me down to the ground.
"Lemme see the ring, bitch!" Stephanie says, and I realize I didn't even really see it. I look up at Rafi, and he pulls the ring out of the box and takes my hand, slipping it on my finger. It's the most gorgeous ring I've ever seen. It has an opal at the center that shines and changes color with the light. There are diamonds all around the sides, surrounding the opal, and it's absolutely stunning and unique, just like us.
I'm crying, and it fits perfectly.
"I love you, Emma." He whispers and kisses me again.
"I love you too."
* * *
We don't talk about the world outside of this house. Instead, we talk about normal things. Thanksgiving, football, Rafi's fight tomorrow. I'm a little worried about him fighting, but already he seems better. A light returned to him. He apparently had been in contact with my father, thanks to Alice, and already knew my living situation.
We haven't talked about living arrangements, but we're getting married, so obviously, we're moving in together.
Stephanie's boyfriend, Adam, bugs Rafi about his stats and tries to brag the whole night about his own 'fighting skills' at his home gym. I whisper shout to my sister, "Where did you find this cretin?" and she elbows me hard. It makes me laugh, and I can't believe how much I needed this.
After dinner, we hang out, but since Thanksgiving dinner ends so early, we had enough time to relax with my family but still make other plans. Rafi has a huge fight tomorrow in Santa Cruz, it was rescheduled at the same arena where he fought The Judge.
He already told me he doesn't want me going, and I feel bad admitting I'm grateful for his insistence. Stetson will go in solidarity, but he's worried that the press will be too much, even if it's positive attention. I just can't handle all the questions and the publicity.
We drove back to his house for the night, quietly sneaking in, leaving the lights off, and making our way upstairs. He doesn't let go of my hand the entire way into his room, even after he shuts the door behind us.
Dragging me toward his bed, he turns and takes a step back.