Chapter 52
SUNDAY
Razor has broken my heart. Not because my feelings have changed for him; if anything, they are deeper, but his childhood is one I wouldn’t wish on anyone, let alone the man I love.
He is broken, lost even, and now I understand why he pushed me away.
“Razor.”
My voice is strong and firm in the silence of the lagoon, and as he turns to me, I order him. “Get naked. Now.”
He says nothing and merely shrugs off his jacket as I do the same, making short work of my clothes in my urgent haste to be close to him.
We slip into the cool water of the lagoon as if to cleanse our spirits, and as I reach for him, I cup his face in my hands and say firmly, “I love you, and nothing you just told me changes that. If anything, it makes me love you more because you are not like him. You are strong, courageous and protective for sure, but your heart is pure. You have reshaped his faults and made them your strengths, and how could I not love that about you?”
I kiss him softly, with purpose and devotion and as his hand curls around my head and he deepens the kiss, I breathe a sigh of relief. In here, treading the crystal water, our past is washed away and we will face the future together and build a strong foundation on the ashes of our past.
* * *
We remain at the lagoon for the entire night.
The light dims, the air chills, and yet we provide our own heat; we always do.
I lose count of the times we fuck, his lips on my skin, mine on his.
The way he pushes inside me, the emotions that flicker like fireflies through every part of my body and mind.
This is paradise to us; it always will be and when the sun edges over the horizon, it’s fitting that we watch it together, my head on his shoulder, our fingers tangled together as the dawn of our new beginning forces the past away, making way for the future.
ONE WEEK LATER
I don’t know why I’m nervous. Maybe it’s excitement, that’s all it can be, and as we pull up outside the familiar building, my heart burns with love.
Razor grips my hand hard.
“You okay, darlin’?”
“Of course.”
I turn to him, never tiring of the way he gazes at me as if I am his world, and I share that devotion because he is mine.
Joe’s Waffle House is lit up like a beacon on the LED sign outside, and there is a line of customers holding their electronic number for their space in the line.
Razor pushes past the gaping customers who have probably never seen anything like him in their lives, and as we enter the place I used to call home, nostalgia reaches out and pulls me in for a hug.
I approach the woman at the desk, noting she is new, and she smiles. “Table for two?”
I shake my head.
“I was wondering if Joe was out back.”
She is surprised and for a second appears confused. My heart falls, and then she smiles and calls to an approaching waiter. “Tell Joe–”
She turns to me. “What’s your name?”
“Um,” I swallow hard. “Josie.”
Razor grips my hand, and as always, it reassures me.
As the waiter heads off, the woman smiles. “He shouldn’t be long. You can wait over there.”
She points to the waiting area where several seats are already occupied, and I nod, turning away as a loud voice booms, “Josie!”
Tears blind me as I turn and my father rushes toward me, his anxious expression mixing with a joyful one and I break away from Razor and run into my father’s arms, unable to hold it together for a minute longer, so happy I’m home.
“I missed you so much.”
I sob on his chest, as I have done since I was a child, memories crowding around me, his strong arms holding me safe.
“I missed you, honey, so much.”
He buries his face in my hair, and it’s as if I’m a kid again.
It takes a while before we break apart, and his huge grin lights my world and sets it right again.
“I can’t believe you’re here.”
“I couldn’t stay away.”
His gaze falls behind me, and the gratitude in his sudden smile tells me where it’s directed.
“Dad, this is Razor. My um, boyfriend.”
I still can’t get used to that, and as my father breaks away, he holds out his hand.
“Thank you.”
Grateful tears shine in his eyes, and as my father shakes the hand of the man I love, everything is right with my world.
“Come, sit, eat, talk.”
My father says with a joyful tone to his voice I haven’t heard in a long time.
“This is my daughter.”
He announces to anyone who will listen, and as we sit in the booth, his arm never leaves my shoulders for a second.
Food arrives, it’s most welcome, and we catch up on life and what happened since I left.
“Have you heard from Devon and Axel?”
I’m anxious for news, and he nods. “They should be home next month on leave.”
“Thank God for that.”
He leans closer and whispers, “Word is they’re done with the military. They have a big announcement, and I don’t know what it can be, but it must be good if they’re giving up the job they love.”
Razor smiles, and for some reason, I can tell he already knows and I raise my eyes, and he grins, turning to yet more waffles that appear to be the last ones he hasn’t tried yet on the menu.
Something is telling me it’s all good though, and as I settle back into my life with my family, I picture a few new faces around the table in the years to come.
Razor will never be his father; he is the opposite of that, and as our family grows, we will become better and make their childhood the best one possible.
Our journey hasn’t been easy but we got there in the end and through it all I never stopped loving my man.
* * *
You must be wondering what happened to Santiago—read on if you are.