Chapter 19 #2
“Pink looks good on her,” I say coolly, my spine stiffening.
Amber and I may have our issues, but I’m not going to let some Trinity-cosplaying wannabe in a latex catsuit trash-talk my sister to my face. I don’t care even if she is Hayes’s family.
I really, really don’t like this woman.
Just then, Argyros comes charging down the stairs and launches himself into my lap with so much force, I nearly topple off the stool.
I wrap my arms around his warm, wriggling body as he whines, nosing into my neck and licking my cheeks like it’s been years since we last saw each other, even though it’s only been a few days.
It’s obvious he missed me just as much as I missed him.
“There you are, Al.”
Hayes appears at the foot of the stairs.
Our eyes lock, and for a moment, the world almost clicks back into place. He looks—God, he actually looks happy to see me.
Then his gaze flicks to the kitchen, and I watch his expression shift. He takes in the odd little scene: me, stiff and ill at ease at the island, while his supposed “relatives” hover around.
“Everything okay in here?” he asks, brow tightening.
That’s when I realize Nikolas and Selene have moved. They’re no longer on either side of me like looming shadows but have drifted several feet back, distancing themselves without a word. Their eyes are fixed on Argyros in my lap, watchful and wary. Almost like they’re… afraid of him.
Which makes zero sense.
Sure, Argy looks like a half-rabid wolf on a bad day, but right now he’s just a big fluffball melting in my arms, tongue lolling, tail thumping lazily. He’s not exactly exuding killer animal energy.
So why are they watching him like he’s about to rip them to shreds?
Or… maybe it’s not Argy they’re worried about at all. Maybe it’s the person standing behind me.
Are they afraid of Hayes?
“C’mon, Selene,” Nikolas says smoothly, already moving. He reaches for her elbow, confident and controlled, like someone who expects to be obeyed. “Looks like it’s time for us to go.”
Selene drags her eyes from Argy and casts a slow, syrupy glance at Hayes through heavy lashes. “Oh, but can’t we stay a bit longer, Hayden?” she purrs, her voice suddenly turning breathy and flirtatious. “We were just getting to know your little friend.”
My jaw tightens.
I don’t like the way she’s looking at Hayes. It’s too familiar. Too hungry. Too… interested. Definitely not how you look at your family. Unless your family is on Game of Thrones.
“Selene. Now.” Nikolas’s voice sharpens, low but firm. She pouts but doesn’t argue as he steers her from the room.
As they walk away, Nikolas glances back over his shoulder. “Pleasure chatting, Alysander. I’m sure we’ll meet again soon,” he says with that cold half-grin, more a warning than a goodbye. Then they disappear around the corner, their footsteps soft against the tile.
After they’re gone, Hayes’s eyes flick briefly to mine, uncertain, shoulders tense. “Sorry about that,” he says. “They were supposed to leave before you got here.”
“So… who are they, exactly?” I raise a brow. “They said they were family?”
He hesitates, then crosses to the fridge, opening it like he’s looking for something before closing it again without taking anything. Then he drops onto the stool beside mine.
“They’re, uh, cousins.”
I nod, scratching behind Argy’s ears as I search for the right words now that we’re alone. I’d rehearsed a dozen things in the car on the ride over. I had all these big, grand speeches that felt right at the time, but now that Hayes is in front of me, all I can do is look at him.
His presence hits me all at once, like a wave I can never fully brace for. The familiar scent of his skin. The heat of his body just inches from mine. His face, his voice, the way the whole room sharpens and softens at once because he’s in it. Even if everything’s changed, he’s still Hayes.
My Hayes.
He looks at me, those fire-blue eyes fading to ash. “Thanks for coming, Alligator,” he says. “I missed you.”
I swallow, my throat thick.
“I’m really sorry about your dad.”
His gaze drops. And only then do I see it fully—the exhaustion carved deep beneath his eyes, the way his face is thinner, hollowed out like something’s been scraped from the inside. He looks completely wrecked in a way I’ve never seen before.
“I still can’t believe he’s gone.”
His voice cracks on the words and I scoot closer, reaching for his hand. The moment I touch him, I feel it. How fragile he is under all that armor. How close he is to shattering completely.
It scares me.
Hayes has always been the strong one. Quiet. Stoic. Unshakeable. The kind of guy who carries his pain without ever showing it, no matter how hard it hurts.
“Did you get the sachets we made?” I ask. “Mom said they’re supposed to help with… you know.” I shrug awkwardly. “Grief.”
“Yeah. We got them.” He nods. “Thanks. That was really thoughtful.”
“How’s your mom doing?”
“Not good.”
“And the funeral?” I falter. “Was it… okay?”
He pauses.
“It was awful.”
I wince, feeling like an idiot. I’m saying all the wrong things.
Of course, Kora isn’t doing well, and obviously the funeral was horrible. What’s next? Should I ask what kind of coffin they picked out? Which designer suit his dad was buried in?
“I’m sorry,” I say again, hating how small and useless the words sound. As if they could ever be enough to fix all he’s lost.
He sighs deeply, like he’s trying to breathe through the weight of it all.
“You don’t have to keep apologizing. That’s not why I asked you over.”
“I know.” I squeeze his hand. “I just don’t know what else to say.”
He looks at me and something desperate and urgent shifts behind his eyes. “I need you to do something for me, Alysander—”
“Of course. Anything.”
“You haven’t heard it yet.” He swallows. “It’s going to sound… strange.”
“It doesn’t matter. Whatever it is, I’m here for you. Always.” I offer a soft smile. “You know that, right?”
“I think I do… yeah.”
He shifts toward me, slow and deliberate. His gaze locks onto mine like he’s searching for something in my face—permission, maybe. A reason not to pull away.
“It’s not just losing my dad. Everything’s changed now,” he says, voice low and rough. “There’s no going back… even if part of me still wishes things were different. That I could… that we could—”
He stops himself and looks down, like he’s said too much.
“We could what, Hay? What are you saying?”
My pulse jumps, breath stuttering, as his hand lifts, tentative at first, fingertips brushing my cheek. Slow, tender. His thumb drags a slow line from cheekbone to chin, sending a spark straight down my spine. It’s like he’s waking something up inside me.
Then his gaze drops to my mouth.
Not quick. Not subtle. Not by accident.
Intentional.
His lips part slightly.
And just like that, I know.
It’s not a guess. Not a hope. Not wishful thinking or a daydream or delusion, but a certainty rooted somewhere deep inside. I feel it in my chest, in my bones, in the thrum of the air sparking between us. In the way time itself seems to pause.
This is real. He wants this.
He wants me.
The space between us disappears in a breath. My eyes flutter shut, my lips parting on instinct as I lean in further.
And then… I kiss him.
Soft. Hesitant.
I don’t know what has come over me, what stupid, reckless impulse finally wins. I can’t believe I’m doing this. I’m about to ruin everything. But just as doubt threatens to overwhelm me, and I start to pull away, he kisses me back.
His mouth is urgent. Unrelenting. Desperate for me. Like he’s starving and has been waiting for this his entire life and can’t hold back any longer.
And God—I feel it, too.
All of it.
He groans into me, hands sliding behind my neck, fingers threading through my hair.
His body presses into mine like he can’t get close enough.
It’s heat and gravity and need colliding in one impossibly perfect moment.
The world spins and cracks wide open. His arms are the only thing anchoring me as the floor slips out from under my feet.
It’s not just a kiss. It’s a goddamn reckoning.
The kind of thing that ruins you and makes you forget there was ever a before. Something that rewrites fate itself.
But then, too fast, too damn fast, he pulls away.
“Oh fuck. I’m sorry,” he says, stumbling back like he’s been shocked.
“Hay?”
I’m still reeling. Breathless, tingling. My heart crashing like waves in my chest.
“We shouldn’t have done that.” His voice is rough, regret bleeding through every word. “That was a mistake.”
“A mistake?”
Something inside me crumbles.
I know things are complicated between us. I know there are reasons. But hearing him call that a mistake? It guts me. With that one word, everything I’ve held onto for years—every secret hope, every hidden feeling—goes up in flames.
“We can’t,” he says, not meeting my eyes. “Amber—”
Shame rushes in then, hot as it floods my cheeks.
Shit.
Amber.
God—how did I forget about Amber? Even for a second.
Even if she’s impossible. Self-absorbed, selfish, inconsiderate. Even if we haven’t felt like real sisters in a very long time—she still is my sister. And Hayes is… what, exactly?
Her ex? Her almost boyfriend again?
Either way, even if they’re not officially anything right now, it’s still a shitty thing to do without talking to her first. It doesn’t matter if her feelings for him are mostly for show, if maybe she only loves the way he looks standing beside her.
It doesn’t matter that my feelings for him go deep enough to undo me.
That I know him better than anyone else and love him anyway.
That he’s the only person I’ve ever loved like this.
The only one I could. It doesn’t even matter that he sees me in ways no one else ever has and probably ever will.
None of that excuses what just happened.
A line was crossed.
Holy hell. What did I just do?
“Right. Of course.” I take a step back, my neck burning. “You and me—we can’t. Because you and Amber are—”
“No. That’s not it.” He cuts in. “You don’t understand.”
Suddenly, the air between us feels all wrong. What was electric only seconds ago is now jagged and torn.
“I should go.”
“No, you can’t.” He grabs my hand and the urgency in his voice returns, stopping me cold. “Amber needs you. That’s why I asked you over.”
I freeze.
“Amber’s here?”
My gaze sweeps the room, heart pounding.
“Not exactly,” he says. “But she’s close. I’ll take you to her.”
“I… I don’t understand.”
“I could try to explain, but you wouldn’t believe me anyway. Not unless you see it for yourself.” His grip tightens, voice softening. “I need you to trust me. Can you do that?”
I stare at him.
Despite everything—the confusion, the hurt, the mess—he’s still him. Still the boy I’ve loved my whole life. My best friend in the world since we were five. My everything.
“I trust you.”
A shadow crosses his face. “You’ll come with me? No matter what happens next?”
“Hayes, you’re acting really weird.”
“Al, please. This is important.”
Something in his eyes makes my stomach drop.
I swallow.
“If you go, I go. Right?”
He holds my gaze a second longer, like he’s sealing an invisible oath between us.
“Good.” He exhales, relieved, and laces our fingers together. “Then follow me.”