Chapter 15 – Harley
Mommie was leaving.
As soon as a rehab facility was found for Mommie, she was leaving. For the time being, Mommie was still at Hortensia General Hospital getting checked out.
Lolly called Harley and updated her. Though Harley begged to see Mommie, she declined.
Mommie’s ugly words to Harley upset both her and Lolly, leaving Harley uncertain how to feel.
She sat in Uncle Val and Aunt Zoann’s den, numb.
She’d probably brought her mother to this point long before Uncle Johnnie’s stupidity.
Harley didn’t blame Rebel for wanting to kill their uncle.
He deserved to die. He’d targeted both their mothers and almost ruined their marriages to good, decent men because he was a little man with a little brain.
What did all of this mean for Daddy and their family? His role in the club? Daddy loved Mommie enough to either resign or take a break.
What about Kaleb and Lou? They preferred doing dude things with Daddy and the cousins, but they loved Mommie, too, especially Kaleb.
School was still in session. Undoubtedly, the moment summer recess began, Daddy would pack up her and the boys and head to wherever Mommie was, if it wasn’t nearby.
Harley explored how she felt about that.
Not good. She didn’t want to leave Hortensia for an extended period.
Mommie didn’t love her anymore. Yes, it was Harley’s fault, but it made it difficult to be around her.
She wanted to stay at Aunt Zoann’s. She was having a new baby, although she swore Harley to secrecy, still not wanting Ryan and Devon to know just yet.
They’d probably be grossed out, knowing how babies were made.
Boys were silly. A giggle escaped Harley. Until she remembered her behavior when Mommie confided in Harley about her lost babies.
Guilt and shame replaced Harley’s numbness.
Karma, she supposed.
She’d rejected Mommie, Daddy, CJ, Lolly, Mattie, Rebel…
everyone. Mattie warned Harley that Rebel’s forgiveness might be temporary.
While Harley needed Rebel’s support, she’d stand at her side.
But, Mattie said, Rebel worried Harley would hurt CJ again.
Whatever else might be said about Rebel, it couldn’t be that she’d turn her back on her brother.
That conversation happened the night of the DNA tests, though. Before Rebel ended up in the hospital again.
Harley shivered, unable to believe Rebel almost drowned for a second time. She wanted to see her. When Uncle Val and Aunt Zoann left earlier, they’d invited Harley to come, but she hadn’t wanted Rebel or Aunt Meggie to send her away. She hadn’t wanted CJ to tell her she wasn’t welcomed.
Aunt Zoann left before Harley spoke to Mommie.
She felt completely alone and abandoned.
CJ said she could text him anytime. He’d even told her they’d go on a real date.
That was days ago, though. She hadn’t heard from him since Rebel’s accident.
Every time she thought of a message to text, she changed her mind.
Curling up on the sofa because she didn’t have the energy to make it to Ryan’s borrowed room, Harley wrapped her arms around her waist and drew her knees up, wishing she could evaporate into nothingness.
The ringing doorbell didn’t rouse her. No one wanted to see her, so she wouldn’t answer. She squeezed her eyes shut, hoping to hold in her tears, but only making them come faster.
“Harley?” CJ’s voice washed over her but she refused to open her eyes, afraid she was dreaming. “I’m on the way to see Rebel and I wanted to know if you’d like to ride with us.”
His hand brushed her cheek and the scent of his aftershave washed over her. She popped one eye open. His green eyes searched her face. He smiled.
“Hey, bae,” he greeted.
“You’re here,” she blurted, ready to launch herself into his arms before realizing Ryan probably let CJ in and stood nearby.
Dragging herself into a sitting position, she bit her lip, so tired of hurting everyone. Awkwardness settled into her. She shrugged.
“Ryan and me are going with Grant,” CJ explained.
Harley peeped around CJ. Ryan sat on the chair across from the sofa, smoking a cigarette.
“Grant’s in the kitchen, hoping there’s a slice of Mom’s thimbleberry cream pie left,” Ryan explained. “I think Dad and Devon devoured it for breakfast.”
“It was delicious,” Harley agreed. “I wanted another piece.”
“Aunt Zoann’s pie is the best,” CJ added. “Fuck, I wish I had known she’d made it.”
Releasing smoke, Ryan looked at CJ. “It was for you, cuck. She expected you to place at the Fair, so to celebrate your win she baked the pie for you, but after Rebel…” His voice trailed off and he glanced away.
“We came in fourth place,” CJ said as if it didn’t matter.
“I’m sorry, CJ,” Harley said. “I know how much you wanted you and Molly to win.”
“No, bae. That entry didn’t advance. Skye and me placed fourth.”
“No shit?” Ryan blurted. “A Caldwell boy lost?”
“Fuck off.” CJ snickered and flipped Ryan off. “If that pie was mine, you should’ve saved me a slice.”
“Mom’s acting weird, so she didn’t say anything when Dad asked for a piece at dinner, then more for breakfast.”
CJ scratched his temple. “I, uh, yeah, dude. I understand.”
“I-I can make the pie,” Harley admitted hesitantly, wondering if CJ knew Aunt Zoann’s secret. “Aunt Zoann showed me how.”
Shaking his head, Ryan set his cigarette in the ashtray on the coffee table. “Still a lucky motherfucker, CJ.”
Harley wasn’t sure what that meant, so she remained silent.
“What do you say, Harley?” CJ asked, ignoring Ryan. “Would you like to visit Rebel?”
“Does she want to see me?”
Before CJ answered, Lolly walked into the den, though Harley hadn’t heard the bell again.
Lolly’s eyes were swollen and red—clearly she’d been crying. She wore no makeup and her hair was brushed back. Though she wore a simple jean dress with a flared hemline, she carried a large leather Prada tote bag.
Harley glanced behind Lolly, hoping to see her mother, but Mommie wasn’t there.
“She’s still at the hospital, baby,” Lolly told her, somehow always knowing Harley’s thoughts.
Tears rushing to her eyes, Harley nodded and sucked her lower lips between her teeth.
CJ sat next to her and hugged her. “It’s okay. Harley. Aunt Bailey is going through a lot right now. She’s always been a good mom. Once she’s better, she’ll talk to you again.”
“You know?” Harley asked around a sob.
“I was on the way here when Grant called me and gave me an update.”
“If you want to go with CJ, Grant, and Ryan to the hospital and visit Rebel, that’s fine, sugar,” Lolly told her, then held the bag a little higher. “I brought everything I need for your hair.”
It wasn’t time to re-braid her hair, but after several washes some needed tightening.
“We can do it here and have a hot meal waiting for when Zoann gets back home. Or you can go with the boys and I’ll cook at home.
I’m fine either way, but I couldn’t rest knowing what that bitch said to you.
How she rejected you. I was ready to beat her ass.
She’s already at the hospital. What’s one more goddamn injury?
No motherfucker, alcohol, or problem will ever make me turn against my children. ”
“Was Daddy in the room?” Harley asked in a small voice.
“When she said she wished you’d never been born and all that other shameful bullshit?”
Harley nodded.
“No, him and Knox were on a conference call with Hal—” Pop’s father.
“Mama is beside herself and your aunts are ready to beat that bitch sober. If they get their hands on her, she won’t need rehab, she’ll need a long fucking hospital stay.
” Lolly started to fan herself. “Lawd Jesus, I’m so fucking angry and hurt and worried. ”
Harley cleared her throat. “Wh-what do you want me to do?”
“This isn’t about me or Bailey or Mortician, Harley,” Lolly told her. “It’s about you and what you need.”
“Where are Kaleb and Lou?” she asked, worried about her brothers.
“With Bunny and Digger,” Lolly answered.
Harley rested her head against CJ’s chest. She didn’t want to offend Rebel or disappoint CJ, but she wanted to stay with her grandmother. Despite what Lolly said, her grandmother needed someone, too.
CJ kissed her forehead. “You stay with Lolly, bae. We can catch up another time. Rebel will probably be released tomorrow and you can visit her then.”
“Are you mad?”
“Nope,” he said, releasing her and getting to his feet.
Ryan stood, too. “Come on, beta boy. Let’s see if we have any fucking food left.”
“I just forgave you, motherfucker,” CJ said in good-natured fun. “Don’t fucking push it by calling me cuck and beta boy.”
“Terms of endearment,” Ryan swore and guided CJ out of sight.
Alone with her grandmother, they stared at each other before Lolly set the bag on the table and opened her arms.
Jumping to her feet, Harley ran to Lolly. They held each other, crying in shared misery.
“CJ’s right,” Lolly said finally. “Bailey loves you. There’s no sorrier bitch than one who pushes away her own children, but underneath the heifer she’s become is the mama you remember and the daughter I raised.”
As much as Harley wanted her hair taken care of, she didn’t want her grandmother to feel as if she had to do something for her.
“Instead of doing my hair, we can make popcorn and sweet tea and watch The Princess and the Frog.”
Mommie always had an affinity to the movie and fostered Harley’s love toward it. Watching it might help her and Lolly to remember the good times they’d had.
Lolly hugged her again. “I’d love that, sugar.”