Chapter 19 – Diesel #2
“I’m still not following you, Torrin,” Diesel said in frustration.
“I fucking know how old Rebel is. Besides, Rebel doesn’t run the streets.
She’s sheltered and na?ve.” More so than he realized.
She hadn’t even known that she couldn’t use a school ID with a major credit card.
“Jekka grew up dirt poor. Rebel didn’t.”
“I have a house,” Torrin said, without addressing Diesel’s concerns.
“I bought it for Jekka because of Agatha. It’s in my name.
” He glanced away and a muscle ticked in his jaw.
“Jekka’s engaged. Since I refused to allow her to bring another man into a house I paid for, she left.
A month ago,” he added, gritted his teeth, and then blew out a breath.
“Fuck her. As soon as I find her, I’m taking my daughter from that bitch. ”
“You see Agatha just a few times a year,” Diesel said, outraged at Torrin’s pettiness. To soothe his ego, he’d hurt a child. His child, at that. “She loves Jekka. You can’t traumatize your daughter because you’re ass hurt over Jekka, who’s driven you fucking insane for as long as I’ve known you.”
Sitting up and running his fingers through his hair, Narci yawned. “Jekka isn’t a common topic of discussion—”
Scowling, Torrin waved Narci’s words off and nodded to Diesel. “If you want Rebel, bring her to my place in Milwaukie.”
“I’m vetoing that idea.” Getting to his feet, Narci pulled out a pack of cigarettes, took one then offered a smoke to Diesel and Torrin.
He lit all three before continuing. “Rebel would blow your cover. She’s jealous of you on a good fucking day.
Imagine if you sleep with her. She’d choke these bitches. And, again, what about Jana?”
“Send Jana to rehab,” Torrin suggested, “then decide.”
“I can’t,” Diesel said quietly, setting his cigarette in the ashtray on the desk and not allowing himself to entertain the idea. “I want to…Rebel doesn’t deserve to be a secret. She doesn’t deserve to have her innocence stolen by me.”
“You wouldn’t force her.”
“She’s a minor,” Diesel gritted. “What the fuck is wrong with you motherfuckers? She doesn’t have the maturity to make that fucking decision,” he heard himself say, when for so many weeks, he’d skirted between right and wrong. “I’m not my father.”
“Maybe not—” Narci began, horrifying Diesel.
“You aren’t,” Torrin inserted, flipping off Narci, “but you are unhappy. Jana isn’t the one for you, brother.”
“Jana fucked up,” Diesel snapped. “It’s a situation between she and I. Don’t fucking interfere.”
“We won’t,” Torrin promised.
“Yeah, D. If you go through with your marriage to her, we’ll treat her the same way we always have,” Narci promised.
“Fuck, are you trying to worry him more or ease his fucking mind, asshole?” Torrin scoffed, discarding his cigarette in the same ashtray Diesel’s was burning down.
“I’m marrying Jana,” Diesel swore. One day, he’d meet that bitch at the end of an altar. “It’s best. I just have to get over my anger toward her.”
“You can always stay engaged to her until Rebel turns eighteen,” Narci suggested.
He could, but now that sanity was returning and his anger abating, Diesel didn’t want to mislead Jana.
Most times, they were good for each other.
He didn’t know what she was like completely sober and, until she went to rehab, he couldn’t give her a fair shot.
She deserved that. Tabitha was out of the picture and Rebel had to become a non-issue.
“Can I ask you something, Diesel?” Torrin started again, repeating the same question that led to this bullshit.
Annoyed, Diesel lifted a brow.
“Would you ever let me or Narci—anyone—fuck Rebel with you?”
Diesel growled, low in his throat, black fury and hot jealousy stirring in his gut. “What the fuck gave you that fucking idea even in the smallest recesses of your motherfucking mind? With or without me, keep your fucking cock away from Rebel if you like it attached to you.”
“Didn’t we fuck your fiancée with your full participation?” Narci demanded.
“Is Jana Rebel? I don’t care who Jana fucks. The only person I’d kill Jana over is if she fucked Kaia Riggs. I’d make her watch me kill him, then I’d keep her alive for a week or two so she could suffer as his dead body decomposed, then I’d kill her.”
“Kaia’s too hot behind Fia to even look at Jana,” Narci said.
Torrin shook his head. “I’m not too sure about that.
Every time Emo Boy shows his fucking face, Jana perks up.
He might not want to fuck her, but I think she wants to fuck him.
I’d go so far to say he’d stick his cock in her just to spite you, Diesel.
” Ignoring Diesel’s outrage, he nodded to Narci.
“And Kaia’s hot behind Fia because Fia sucks good dick.
That motherfucker wants Rebel. He’s just emptying his balls until she’s ready. ”
Diesel thought about all the times he’d seen Kaia and Jana together. He cared more about what Kaia was doing with Rebel than how Jana was looking at Kaia. And he still didn’t truly give a fuck—it was the principle. He fucking hated Kaia.
For whatever reason, Diesel always thought Jana was better than fucking everything she saw. He thought she was better than him and deserved so much more. Except all evidence showed he hadn’t really felt that way.
She could fuck almost anyone and he’d see it as a license to enjoy other women. Otherwise, it wouldn’t matter. Now or ever.