Chapter 22 #2
“Yeah, I’m okay. I’ve got Boomer.” I angle the phone to show an upside-down Boomer.
Hunter laughs. “He looks really comfortable like that.”
“I know. He’s so floppy.” I grin, bouncing my arm slightly to make his head wobble. “While we’re on the subject of Boomer, though, I kinda have a question.”
“What’s up?”
I keep my eyes on Boomer, shifting him into a more comfortable position. “Coach asked me if I’d like to take ownership of him. He usually lives with Colleen, who’s our PR lady, but Coach mentioned her situation has changed and asked if I would like to keep him.”
Hunter’s silent for a moment, and when I glance back at my phone, he’s smiling softly. “Are you asking for my permission to keep him?”
“No? Maybe?” I sigh, dropping my head back. “Yeah.”
He chuckles. “You don’t need to ask me, El.”
My head snaps back up. “But we’re a couple now, and couples should, like, talk to each other, especially about big things.
And getting a dog is a big thing. Like, I’m on the road a lot, and you work twenty-four-hour shifts.
I wanted to check with you before I said yes because he wouldn’t just be mine…
” I trail off, chewing on the inside of my cheek before saying, “He’d be ours. ”
A slow, wide grin appears on his face.
“What?” I ask.
“You teased me the other day for talking about our future, and you’re already proposing we get our first fur child?”
A burst of laughter escapes me. “Our first fur child? Does this mean we can have more?” I gasp, widening my eyes. “We could have a hockey team of dogs!”
“Well, I think that might be taking it a little too far,” he says with a chuckle.
“I guess so,” I snort.
“But yes.” He smiles, his brown eyes shining. “We can keep Boomer.”
After Coach Harris returned to his office with his coffee, I let him know our decision, and then we headed out to the parking lot and moved all of Boomer’s belongings into my Jeep.
Who knew a dog came with so much stuff?
Now we’re lying on the couch in the same position we were the first night he stayed over. He’s fast asleep between my legs, head resting on my stomach. My fingers comb through his fur as I stare aimlessly at the TV.
The moment I got him settled, it was like I hit a wall. This wave of exhaustion came over me, and my body felt so heavy and numb. I felt so drained I could barely move.
In the posts I’d read online, a lot of people mentioned how they felt fatigued after receiving their diagnosis.
I didn’t really pay much attention to it because I kinda expected to be told I have it.
But it seems expecting it and having it confirmed are two different things.
And while there’s a weight that’s been lifted, I’ve been left feeling sluggish.
All I want right now is to curl up next to Hunter and sleep. Have him play with my hair in that relaxing way he does, but he’s on shift.
There’s a deep ache in my chest at the thought of not seeing him until after practice tomorrow afternoon, but then Boomer chooses that moment to let out a loud snore.
I press my lips together, trying to stop myself from laughing as he mimics a freight train. Smiling to myself, I settle back into the cushions, feeling pleased I’m not completely alone.
The sound of someone knocking on my door wakes me up some time later. Boomer jolts off the couch and runs over to the door, letting out a low huff. I toss the blanket off me and stand, stretching my arms over my head with a yawn. I grab onto Boomer’s collar before opening the door.
Standing on the other side are Blaine, Zach, Jackson, Peyton, and Ethan.
“W-what are you guys doing here?” I ask, rubbing my tired eyes with the heel of my palm.
“Can we come in?” Blaine asks, his smile a little wobbly.
I step aside, keeping hold of Boomer’s collar. Ethan’s last in, and he’s holding two plastic storage containers.
I brighten slightly, pointing at them. “Is that Jacob’s bread?”
“Yep, and some muffins.”
I shut the door behind him and let go of Boomer so I can make grabby hands. “Ooo, gimme.”
He hands over the containers, and I open the top one. I take a deep inhale of the smell of fresh bread and let out a happy sigh.
“I fucking love Jacob’s bread.”
Everyone takes a seat on the couch. Boomer pushes Blaine out of the way to steal the spot next to me and puts his head on my lap.
“What have I done to deserve this visit? Have you finally decided to take my idea to start a boy band?” I ask, kicking my feet up on the coffee table. I tear off a chunk of bread and shove it in my mouth, holding the container close to my chest in a clear sign I’m not sharing it.
“No, and I thought we’d vetoed that idea,” Zach replies with a lopsided grin.
“Never,” I say between bites. “Imagine how cool intermission will be. We could build a stage and everything. Peyton will be the one who always takes his clothes off.”
“Hey! I do have some dignity, you know,” Peyton argues.
We all scoff in response.
“Well, you can count me out,” Jackson chuckles. “I have enough of that at home.”
I grin. “How’s Isabela enjoying the drum set?”
He gives me an unimpressed look. Clearly, my Christmas gift didn’t go down well. “It’s in the theater room. Where it’s soundproof.”
“Damn. I’ll have to go louder next time.”
“We’re not here to talk about starting a boy band, although I also veto the idea,” Blaine interjects, twisting his body to face me.
“Coach pulled Peyton aside earlier and said you had received some news…” His voice trails off, and I lift my head up from the tin to look at him.
His eyes are full of sadness, and part of me fractures over the fact that I never told him.
Is he going to be mad with me?
“We wanted to let you know that we’re here for you, for whatever you need,” Jackson says. “I know how overwhelming it can be to begin with. Suddenly, your life as you know it has this new color to it. It’s the same, but different, and it feels easier to push people away than to let them in.”
“How long have you been feeling like this?” Zach asks.
“I guess I’ve always felt like I haven’t really fit in, but I didn’t know why.
Hunter brought it up one day because he thought I already knew, and it got me thinking.
” I shrug. “And I guess I know now why I’ve felt the way that I do, and because I’ve been trying to fit into a world that isn’t built for people like me. ”
Blaine’s mouth twists like he’s trying to hide his feelings. I poke his thigh and offer him a reassuring smile.
He smiles back, but his lips quiver, and he shakes his head, turning away to look out the window.
I look down at Boomer. His eyes are closed, and I gently run my fingers through the soft fur on his head.
“I think I speak on behalf of all of us when I say this: I’m really fucking sorry we didn’t realize, and if any of our actions have ever made you feel like you needed to be anyone except yourself around us,” Ethan says with a look of regret in his eyes.
The back of my eyes burns as I look over to my friend and old captain. Pressing my lips together, I take a deep breath and shake my head. “You guys have always made me feel safe to be me.”
“I’m really pleased about that,” Peyton adds, giving my shin a squeeze.
Blaine wraps his arms around my head, kissing the top of my scalp, and murmurs, “I love you, El.”
“I love you too, doofus,” I mumble, unable to hug him back because my arms are trapped around the bread container.
He pinches my ear and settles into the couch next to me before stealing a chunk of bread.
They stay for the next few hours. We order pizza and simply sit in a companionable silence while we watch TV.
And I couldn’t be more thankful to have the greatest friends in the world.