Chapter 14
CHAPTER FOURTEEN
“WILL I MAKE IT OUT ALIVE” BY TOMMEE PROFITT, JESSIE EARLY
STEELE
“Ifucked up so bad.”
Ant’s words ring in my ears, and a million shitty scenarios fly through my mind.
“What happened?” Nox immediately questions, and Ant comes further into the room, taking a seat in the armchair across from us.
He takes a heaving breath. “I kissed her.”
There’s a beat of silence.
“And?” I ask carefully, knowing that if it was just that, he wouldn’t be freaking out so damn much.
He runs his hands through his hair, which is chaos and unlike the normal controlled style he usually has. “And she kissed me back.” He blows out a hard breath. “Then I fucked it up by mentioning us leaving.”
I inhale sharply, wanting to rip him a new fucking one but knowing that won’t help.
“Shit.” Nox huffs, his jaw tight and tension cords his neck. “When I kissed her I managed not to fuck things up. Who knew I was suddenly the responsible one.”
Ant’s head snaps up, eyes narrowed. “You kissed her? When?”
“Sunday, after Family Day.” Nox sighs. “Best fucking kiss of my life.”
“Yeah,” Ant agrees, eyes going a little faraway. Then he turns them on me, and it’s hard to hold my smile in. “And you…”
“Made sweet passionate love to her delectable pussy all night Saturday,” I tell him smugly, and his right eye twitches. “And I too, managed not to fuck it up.”
Nox barks out a laugh, and Ant flips him off.
“It’s not funny. I hurt her, fuck—”
That sobers me up pretty fast, and I have to count to five to stop myself from launching at him and punching him in that pretty boy face of his.
“Look, things have changed since we got here. Then they changed on Saturday after I was with her. She wanted me. I wanted her. She wants all of us. And I don’t plan on leaving anytime soon. Just so it’s on the record.”
“Wait,” Ant’s eyes are wide as he leans forward. “She wants all of us?”
“Keep up bro,” Nox adds like the shit stirrer he is, and Ant turns a glare onto him.
“You knew?”
“Steele and I had a conversation on Monday, after we all got jealous of gay James.”
“Dude, you can’t call him that,” I pinch the bridge of my nose.
“What?” Nox looks up, confusion making his brows dip. “His name is James and he’s gay. Plus, it reminds me that I don’t have to kill him for kissing our girl.”
Nox fucking logic.
“Can we get back on track please,” Ant interjects, pinning me with his stare. “She wants all of us?”
I roll my eyes. “She admitted it. Said it was complicated because she wants me, and you and Nox. Said it was like wanting all the desserts at the table. Believes she doesn’t deserve us all.”
His lips part, then close. “That’s why she looked so hurt when I mentioned leaving.”
“No fucking shit Sherlock,” Nox hisses. “So, just so I have the facts straight. We’ve all kissed her—”
“Technically I licked that sweet pussy and filled her up with my cum until it dripped out,” I interrupt, frying Nox’s brain for a hot second as he no doubt pictures what I just said. “Plus, you know what they say. Once you go Black you never go back.”
“Asshole.” He not so subtly adjusts himself in his sweats. “Moving on, she wants all three of us. We all want her, and fuckface over here told her we were still leaving.” He glares at Ant. “Did I miss anything?”
Ant’s shoulders slump. “I told her I wasn’t going anywhere, then contradicted myself by reminding her we were planning to leave.” He scrubs a hand down his face. “But she ran off before I could tell her that was our plan, but not anymore. Not from my side anyway.”
We sit in silence, digesting the shitshow we’re now in.
“Okay,” I start, looking at Nox, then Ant. “We need to decide what we want.” I take a breath. “But before we do, there’s something you guys should know. I’m only telling you this because if it changes anything about how you feel, I don’t want that happening after you’ve committed to her. To this.”
“It won’t,” Nox quickly says.
“Still.” I stare at each of them. “Blossom can’t have kids.
Not of her own. She has a condition that means she was born without a uterus, so she can’t carry a baby and doesn’t want to use a surrogate.
It’s why she started to foster so early.
It still makes her feel like she’s less, and her dad sounds like a dick who made it into a big deal.
Some carrying on the family name bullshit. ”
“Shit, that must have been so hard for her,” Nox murmurs, surprising me because he never usually concerns himself with others feelings. But then she’s changed us, made us better men in the short time we’ve been here.
“Does it matter to you?” Ant asks, and I’m shaking my head before he’s even finished.
“No. I told her it doesn’t matter. But I wanted to tell you guys so you can think about it before anything goes further. I don’t want to risk her getting hurt.” I give a side glance at Ant. “Again.”
He winces. “I’ve got Jus. And this house will be full of kids who need us. That’s more than enough.”
Something fierce and warm blooms in my chest.
“Nox?”
He gives a sharp laugh. “You think I give a shit about that? About my DNA being passed on? I’m not exactly father material anyway.”
I give a satisfied nod. “Good. Just wanted you to know going in.”
“Does she think it’ll be a problem for us?” Nox asks, showing that new insight into others again. I’m fucking proud of him.
“Yes. As I said, it’s a mental wound that still hurts. She was worried that I wouldn’t want her because of it. Tried to tell me she understood if it made a difference.”
“Always so selfless,” Ant murmurs. Then his jaw clenches.
“We’ll just have to make fucking sure that she knows it doesn’t matter.
” He lets out a sharp breath. “I don’t want to leave.
I thought we had to. That we needed our own place to prove we could take care of Jus.
But he’s happy here. Thriving. And Blossom… ”
He stops, that faraway look in his eyes again and Nox and I share a knowing look.
“You’re falling for her,” Nox states. Not a question.
Ant turns those blue eyes on first Nox, then me. “I’m falling for her. Hard.”
“So am I,” I reply, that warmth in my chest blossoming into a fire.
“Fuck, me too,” Nox adds, surprise coating his tone.
It’s quiet as we all absorb this simple yet life changing fact.
Anatole breaks it. “So, we stay. But how do we do this? The three of us with her? What will people say? What will we say to the kids?” He chuckles and I raise a brow in question at him. “Jus told me that polygamy is all the rage nowadays.”
“Little shit,” Nox laughs.
“We share her, like we’ve always shared everything.
We don’t let this split us up—we let it bind us together.
And we work to give her everything she needs, all the love she’s never had.
” Something feels so damn right saying those words.
“And Jus stays. This is where he builds his future. We're not taking that from him by moving out. We might even be able to get full custody now given we’d have a permanent address in a good fucking neighbourhood and jobs.”
Ant’s blue eyes light up at that, his shoulder loosening for what seems like the first time in years.
“Think she’ll go for it?” Nox asks, a hint of vulnerability in his tone.
I smile. “She already has. We just need to make it official.”
“FOUND A HOME” BY AG, NILU
BLOSSOM
I get back from Friday morning school run, the two homeschoolers having gone on a trip today and Tina is out shopping. Once again the house is quiet, and I hate it.
My heart aches today, Anatole’s rejection still a tender spot that keeps flaring with pain every time I remember his words about leaving.
Walking into the kitchen, I come to a standstill when I spot all three guys, and the table covered in muffins and pastries, the scent of hot chocolate filling the air.
“Aren’t you meant to be at work?” I ask, wasps filling my stomach at seeing them all turn to face me. “Is everything okay? Is Jus—”
“Jus is fine, Bloom,” Anatole assures me, stepping forward and reaching for my hands, then stopping short. “We took the day off. We need to talk. About what I said yesterday. In the garden. After we kissed.”
My eyes widen as I look at the other two. “It’s okay, Anatole. I understand—”
“Do you?” Nox asks, stalking closer until he’s next to Anatole. His green eyes cut through me, leaving me open and raw. “Because I don’t think you do, Petal.”
The way he says my nickname has a shiver skating down my spine.
Steele steps up next to Ant, then steps past him and Nox, taking one of my trembling hands in his. His deep brown eyes bore into me, so steady, so safe. “We’re not leaving, Flower. None of us.”
I blink. “But Anatole said—”
Anatole comes forward, stealing my attention as Steele gives my hand a reassuring squeeze.
“I know what I said and I’m a fucking asshole for even bringing it up.
” He takes my other hand, bringing it to his lips and placing a kiss to the back of it.
“You said you needed someone who stays. Well we aren’t going anywhere. Not now. Not ever.”
My head reels, my mind racing. “But Jus—”
“Is happier than he’s ever been, than I’ve ever seen him. He has siblings. He has stability. He has you.” His blue eyes are full of a fire that heats me up from the inside. “Why would I take him away from all of that?”
“You’d stay? For him?” I blink against the sudden moisture of tears.
“For you,” Anatole assures me.
“For us. All of us,” Nox adds from his other side.
I’m shaking now, looking between them all but seeing nothing other than sincerity. “I don’t understand.”
Anatole lets go of my hand to cup my face, his calloused palm warm and steady. “Steele told us. About what you said. About wanting all the desserts.”
My eyes go wide, my cheeks flaming. “Oh lord—”
“About you wanting all of us. Together and separately,” Nox says, his voice low and husky telling me he’s not just talking about us being together in public.
“The question is, Bloom, do you still want us? All three of us? Together? Because fuck, we want you so bad it’s hard to breathe,” Anatole confesses and his words caress the deepest parts of me.
“I…” My mouth runs dry. It’s like being offered a table full of all your favourite foods, but not only do you not know where to start, you don’t trust it won’t be taken away. I swallow. “You should know, I can’t have children. Ever.”
I’m expecting shock from Anatole and Nox, questions, maybe even hesitation. But instead they just smile at me, warm and certain, Anatole stroking my cheek with his thumb.
“We know. Steele told us.”
I look away, my cheeks heating as embarrassment flares hot and bright.
A flash of something — exposure, rawness — passes through me at the knowledge that he shared that.
Then it dissolves, because they're still standing here, still smiling at me, and it doesn't matter that he told them. It matters that they stayed. “If any of you wanted biological children someday, I’d understand. You could find someone—”
“Flower, stop. We already spoke about this. I don’t give a fuck. I just want you. Scars and all, remember?” Steele interjects, his soulful brown eyes sincere.
My throat goes tight.
“We don’t care, Petal. There are more than enough children here to keep us busy,” Nox adds, and a choked laugh falls from my lips.
Anatole’s other hand comes up, cupping my other cheek until he’s holding me in his palms. “Look at me, Bloom.” I do as he says, and approval makes his eyes shine.
“You are enough. More than enough.” A sob catches in my throat.
“And why you’ve decided we are worth your time is beyond me.
But we will spend every fucking day for the rest of our lives proving to you that we are worthy of you.
” Tears trace a hot path down my cheeks as he brings our foreheads together. “Say yes. Please, baby. Say yes.”
“Yes,” I breathe, feeling his smile as he closes the gap between our lips.
“Good girl,” he whispers against my mouth.
Oh.
Oh wow.
I did not know how much those two words would affect me, but my knees turn to jelly as his lips brush mine, sealing our fate with a kiss.
There’s none of the desperation in his kiss like yesterday, but it’s no less consuming. He steals every breath I try to take, replacing it with his own until all I can taste is him.
I’m just getting used to it when he pulls away, turning my face and dropping his hands, only for another set of lips to replace his before I can even open my eyes.
Steele.
If his rumble of a growl didn’t give him away, then the way he dominates me would. He’s all tongue and teeth, nipping my lips and then fucking my mouth with his tongue like that alone can make me come. And by the way my thighs clench together, he’s not far off the mark.
He too pulls back just as I get used to his claim, and then long fingers wrap around the front of my throat, tugging me towards a mouth that should be sharp with the cutting words that usually flow from it.
But Nox’s mouth may just be the softest of them all.
He commands me, controls each movement, his thumb stroking the skin of my neck in a way that has a whimper falling from my lips into his.
And like the arsehole he is, he just smiles against me, his tongue dancing, teasing before he finally gives it to me.
Like the other two, he pulls away when he decides, and a husky laugh falls from his lips when I chase him with my own.
“Later Petal.” I blink my eyes open, my vision hazy as it focuses on his pretty bronze face. “Now, we eat brunch.”
I look between the three of them — Anatole's flushed alabaster cheeks, Steele's dark eyes heavy with want, Nox's bronze skin warm in the morning light — and I think: mine. All of them are mine.