22. Rae
22
RAE
Then
T here’s a moment, after I come as close to telling Hunter that I’m in love with him as I’ll allow myself to get tonight, when he looks at me like he can’t believe I’m real. It’s dark in the truck, but I can see his eyes, and the wonder in them as he toys with my nipples makes my core melt.
He wants this.
He wants me.
And I’ve never been happier than I am right now.
I suck in a shaky breath as he lowers his mouth to one breast while continuing to pinch and pull at the nipple of the other. My head goes back, and I moan loudly when his warm, wet lips press into my skin, planting soft kisses along my flesh before he opens wide and sucks me into his mouth.
My hand is at the back of his head, nails digging into his scalp as I writhe in his lap. “ Hunter .”
“Hmm?” He hums, swirling his tongue around my nipple before biting down on it gently.
“Let the seat back.”
His left hand leaves me, abandoning my body for just a second, long enough to pull the lever that lets back his seat. Now that he’s lying flat, gazing up at me with eyes that are greedy for every inch of skin I put on display when I shed my dress, I feel shy all of a sudden, which is stupid because I’ve been naked in front of other people before. I’ve even been naked in front of guys. Well, a guy. Cameron. We dated from ninth to twelfth grade and fooled around a lot in those few years, never going all the way because I wouldn’t let it.
Something just didn’t feel right, and I didn’t know how to explain it to him because I wasn’t like the other girls who were waiting for marriage or prom or the perfect night in the back of some guy’s truck. I was just waiting for it . The right moment with the right person, and that moment is now. That person is Hunter.
Leaning over him, I take his mouth in an all-consuming kiss, aware of the way his hands are exploring every line and curve of my body. His tongue slips between my lips as his fingertips ghost down my spine, caressing every notch and disc on the way to my ass where he grabs two rough handfuls of flesh and squeezes, urging me forward. I pull back, looking into wild eyes that demand things his mouth has yet to say.
“Get up here,” he orders me, the words rough and commanding. I don’t move. I can’t move. I’m too shocked because I’ve never seen him like this. Even the first night that we met, when he was just a few hours removed from using and still feeling the effects of the drugs, he didn’t look as dazed as he does now. His eyes are so low, they’re almost closed, and when he speaks again, giving me more explicit instructions because he’s clearly taken my awe-induced paralysis for confusion, his voice is nothing more than a dark, dirty whisper. “Bring that pretty little pussy up here and sit it on my face, Sunshine. I want to taste you.”
I clamber up his body, graceless and uncaring about looking sexy because I feel sexy. Under Hunter’s watchful gaze, I feel beautiful. Hovering above his handsome face, I feel powerful and desired and perfect. And it doesn’t matter that the cab of the truck is so low I have to curve my spine and rest my hands on the seats in the back row because Hunter’s head is between my thighs and the wet heat of his mouth is centimeters away from my pussy and his fingers are moving my underwear to the side so he can nuzzle my clit with his nose before lapping at it with short, teasing licks of his tongue meant to drive me crazy.
My nails dig into the leather seats underneath my hands, and my thighs quiver around his ears, but Hunter takes his time. He savors me. He teases me. He drives me to the point of madness and brings me back, just to start the process all over, and when I’m close to sobbing and the insides of my thighs are raw from the constant rub of his beard, and the evidence of my need has made the bottom half of his face slick, he loosens his hold on my hip and brings his hand down, slipping two large fingers into me for the sole purpose of driving me insane.
“HUNTER!” I scream his name, and I feel the knowing smile forming on his lips nestled against the inside of my thigh.
“Don’t worry, Sunshine. I’m going to let you come…eventually.”
“Please,” I sob, tears of disbelief mixed with pleasure squeezing out of the corners of my eyes as I move up and down on his fingers.
“That’s it,” he praises. “Fuck my fingers just like that. Show me how you’re going to ride my dick when I give it to you.”
My core contracts, rippling with the anticipation of what’s to come, quivering because of what’s already being given. His fingers move deeper, drawn in with every pulse of my walls, and it’s not long before he’s found that spot deep inside me that sends sparks of pleasure down my spine. I arch my back, working my hips in small, helpless circles as I chase that feeling. Hunter growls his approval, and because he’s still eating my pussy like it’s his job, I feel the vibrations of the sound right in my clit.
Everything grows slicker, hotter, wetter. Sweat is dripping down my back and lining the edges of my hairline. The windows have fogged up, turning the truck into our own personal bubble of sin, and it’s everything.
Everything I wanted. Everything I needed. Everything I knew we’d be.
“You’re ready now,” Hunter tells me, coming up for a second of air before returning to his ministrations with renewed intensity. I want to laugh because I was ready ten minutes ago. Hell, I was ready the moment he used his tongue to part my lips, but I don’t laugh. I don’t breathe. I don’t do anything except fall apart for him, baring down hard because my body demands it, and letting out helpless cry after helpless cry while I quite literally drown Hunter in my pleasure.
He drinks every bit of my release, not letting a single drop escape his attention while he reaches down and undoes his pants. I’m boneless and exhausted, still recovering from the best orgasm of my life, but the clang of his belt and the quiet glide of his zipper energize me. And this time I don’t want for his instructions because I know exactly where I need to be.I shimmy down his body, laughing when he nips at my breasts when they pass over his mouth.
When our mouths are aligned, I pause just to taste myself on his lips. His face is wet, every strand of his beard coated in my essence, and I laugh when, quick as a flash, he brings his hands up and grips either side of my face, holding me still so he can rub it all over me.
“You’re a menace,” I gasp, trying to wriggle out of his hold. It’s a half-hearted attempt because I actually don’t want to be anywhere but right here, in this moment with him. His eyes on my face, his hard body between my thighs. His dick, thick and erect and already trying to nudge its way inside me.
The moment turns serious all of a sudden as Hunter’s thumb brushes over my lips, parting them slightly on its way down my chin to my neck. Long fingers span the width of my throat, fingertips dance over my pulse, a silent question I can only answer by covering his left hand with one of my own and using my fingers to apply the pressure he’s afraid to. Heat flashes in his eyes, and I rock back onto his dick, needing to feel him inside me. He shakes his head, “Condom.”
“It’s fine?—”
“No, it’s not.” His tone leaves no space for argument, and for some stupid reason, it makes me want to cry. I know it’s not rational. I know this is our first time, and I don’t even know if things between us will go any further than this moment, than this night, but I want that closeness with him. I want everything with him, and his insistence on a condom makes me feel like he doesn’t want those things with me. “Hey,” he says softly, sitting up so we’re face to face. He drops a soft kiss on my lips. “I want everything you want, okay? But you’ve got a future to think about. You’ve got dreams to chase. I’m not going to be responsible for clipping your wings before you’ve even gotten a chance to fly.”
“You don’t know what I want,” I say, tears clogging my throat because, of course, he knows what I want. He’s my best friend. He’s my first love. He’s my Hunter.
“You want love, Sunshine. You want a house full of laughter. You want to fill up my house with babies that will run us ragged every day for the rest of our lives. You want a tree house in our tree and birthday parties out in the yard.”
The image he paints of my desires is intoxicating. Every word is a memory of a moment, of a life, we’ve yet to live together, and I can’t find a single, good reason why we can’t start living it right now.
Hunter kisses me again, a slow, burning kiss. “But you also want to dance. You want the stage and the lights and the applause. You want little girls who look like you to see you and know they can be living, breathing art, too.”
“Why can’t I have both?” I punctuate my question with a roll of my hips that has him hissing out a curse through his teeth.
“One day you will, Sunshine, but that only happens if we make smart decisions today.”
“Ughhh,” I groan, throwing my head back in exasperation. “Why do you have to make sense at a time like this?”
“One of us has to,” he says, grinning as he uses his free hand to lift the center console and fish out his wallet. I watch him remove the gold-foiled condom from the folded leather, entranced as he tears it open with his teeth and sheaths himself with just one hand. Once he’s satisfied that the condom is secure, he lays back and stares at me, shaking his head. “You’ve never been more beautiful.”
God, I love this man.
Reaching behind me, I grip his length and squeeze gently, just enough to make his pupils dilate and pull another gruff curse free from his throat. Then I lift up and guide him to my entrance, sucking in a breath when I feel the first thick inch of him breaching my walls.
Hunter’s fingers flex around my throat, applying pressure to the sides, but just enough to bring my attention to his face. “Go slow, okay? We’re not in a rush.”
I nod and swallow when his right hand goes to my hip, easing me down as his hips lift to meet me. “Okay.”
Hunter is a big man, so I wasn’t expecting his dick to be small. I mean, everything about the way he carries himself suggests that he’s got a fucking third leg, but knowing that hasn’t prepared me for his girth or length. We work slowly, so fucking slowly that I’m panting by the time we’ve made any real progress, but I still feel like I’m being split open in the best possible way. I glance down at us, and seeing the lips of my sex hugging his shaft makes my eyes roll into the back of my head.
“Oh my God,” I moan, lifting up slightly and coming back down to help him slide in further.
Hunter stills, his eyes trained on my face. “You okay?”
I nod, my vision blurry from tears and sweat and the delirium of passion. “I’m fine. I’m perfect.”
“Ready for more?”
“Yes,” I gasp, because more is all I’ve ever wanted from him.
When he strokes up into me the first time, breaking through that final bit of my body’s resistance, I scream. Not because it hurts but because it’s the most glorious moment of connection. A joining of bodies. A melding of our souls. Hunter feels it too; I can tell by the way his brows furrow, by the way, he bites his lip and looks at me like I’m some sort of goddess or witch.
I want to tell him that goddesses don’t get ensnared by their own magic and witches can’t be affected by their own spells, but I don’t. I just channel all my energy into meeting him thrust for thrust, smiling wickedly when his eyes go wide with surprise when I tell him to go harder, to be rougher, to give me more than he’s ever given anyone. He submits to my requests, fulfilling my every need even as he runs his own pleasure down, and when I come again, with my nails digging into the flesh of the hand still wrapped around my throat, he falls over the edge with me.
Panting, I collapse on his chest. My eyes fall shut as Hunter drops kisses on the top of my head, and I struggle to keep those three little words, alive and impatient on my tongue, at bay. I’ve already given so much of myself, already pressed to get us here, I don’t want to be the person to force us to the next step before we’re ready. But I feel it. I’ve felt it for so long, it feels blasphemous to hold them from him, especially after what we’ve just shared.
“Sunshine?” he says, running his fingers down my side.
“Yeah?”
“You know I love you, right? I wouldn’t have—we never would have done this if I didn’t love you. If I didn’t feel the same way about you that you feel about me.”
Tears spring to my eyes, slipping out from underneath my closed lids. I bite my lip, reminding myself that I promised I wouldn’t be the one to say it first, but I didn’t say anything about saying it back .
“I love you too.”