Chapter 11
Chapter Eleven
Ryan
Three days. I hadn't spoken a word to Ronan.
"Ryan, why won't you talk to Daddy?" Rose whispered in my ear during a break from our game.
"I am," I said, touching her head. "We've been acting the same as always, haven't we?"
"Really?"
"Of course. Come on, let's go check out the hydrangeas Andrew just planted."
Rose's attention shifted instantly. I let out a quiet breath of relief.
Adult problems shouldn't drag kids in. Speaking of which, things with Nick had gotten weird after that night.
He hadn't come back to the manor, and when I tried apologizing for what he'd overheard, I discovered he'd blocked me.
Made sense, I guess. If I'd heard something like that.
.. I smiled bitterly. I wouldn't want anything to do with that person either.
At least Rose was doing better than I'd expected.
She'd started saying good morning to people around the manor on her own, and with strangers she just seemed a little shy.
But nothing in this world ever goes smoothly.
Out of nowhere, Victoria started demanding to be involved in Rose's treatment again.
"Rose is doing so much better. Why can't I be part of her therapy?" Victoria's eyes blazed. "You've been making all the treatment decisions by yourself this whole time, with no oversight. It's completely inappropriate! You're trying to monopolize Rose so you can—"
"Victoria, why do you always think I'm using Rose for something?" I was tired of her nonsense. "I'm not blocking you out. This stage just isn't appropriate."
"Ha! You always say it's not appropriate!" Victoria fumed. "Am I wrong? You ARE using Rose to get close to Ronan—"
"Victoria!" I cut her off sharply. "Everything I do for Rose has nothing to do with Ronan! You keep twisting my genuine care for her into something ugly. Is that what YOU would do?"
"You!" Victoria's face flushed red. Her lips moved, but what finally came out was a hollow threat. "We'll see about this!"
I went through Rose's treatment records again, thought it over, then called Emily in.
"Tonight I'll stay with Rose until she falls asleep. After that, arrange for someone to check on her every two hours. If anything seems off, tell me immediately." Emily looked confused but nodded.
That night I stayed in Rose's room. She held Luna in her lap, flipping through a picture book about ocean animals. When she reached the page on orcas, she looked up. "Ryan, do orcas eat cats?"
"No, orcas eat fish. Cats are too big to swallow. Okay, sweetie, you really need to sleep now."
"Orcas really don't eat cats?"
"I promise!"
Satisfied, she lay down, clutched Luna tight, and closed her eyes.
"Miss Clark! Something's wrong with Rose!"
Before dawn, someone pounded on my door hard enough to shake it. I bolted awake, jumped out of bed, didn't even grab shoes, and ran straight to Rose's room.
"Rose, it's me, Ryan."
No answer. I knocked three more times, waited a few seconds, then pressed down on the handle. Locked from inside. I pressed my ear to the door. No sound.
"Miss Clark, Rose was fine earlier, but an hour ago, when I checked, the door wouldn't open. Then I heard her screaming. She told me to go away." The maid on night duty was close to tears.
My hand tightened on the handle. "Don't panic. Get the spare key."
When the door swung open, my chest seized. Rose was curled in the corner of the bed, blanket wrapped from head to toe, body rolled into a tight ball. Luna circled her anxiously, whimpering, pawing at the blanket. Hearing someone enter, Rose whipped around to face the wall.
"Rose, it's me."
I crouched three steps from the bed. Her breathing came shallow and fast, the blanket trembling with her shaking shoulders.
"I won't come closer, Rose." I softened my voice. "But I'm right here with you, okay?"
I sat where she could see me, placed crackers on the nightstand by her bed, got up to refill Luna's water bowl, then set her old toy bear near her feet. I wasn't going to attempt any therapy. I just wanted her to know there was at least one safe place in this world.
Emily set up a pallet on the floor for me. I picked up the agitated Luna. Its right claw had a broken nail, the edge stained with faint blood. What the hell had happened?
The first day, she didn't move. Not until Luna squirmed out of my arms and burrowed under the blanket did Rose finally react.
Those fear-filled eyes looked at Luna, then at me.
After a moment's hesitation, she reached out, lifted the glass of milk from the nightstand, forced herself to drink, then quickly retreated under the covers.
The second day, half asleep, I heard broken sobbing. I couldn't take it anymore. I climbed off the pallet, hurried to the bed, and tentatively tried to hug Rose. This time, thankfully, she didn't resist. She let me hold her, her small body pressed tight against mine, her crying gradually quieting.
The third evening, exhausted from the past two days, Rose finally fell into a deep sleep under the blanket.
I tiptoed to the bed, pulled the kicked-off covers back over her, and placed Luna by her pillow.
Her brow was still furrowed, but her breathing had steadied.
I finally had the mental space to think about what could have caused Rose to change so drastically overnight. One name surfaced clearly—Victoria.
I told Emily not to leave Rose's side for a second, then headed straight for Victoria's room. Her door was ajar. I shoved it open.
Victoria was at her vanity applying lipstick. Seeing me burst in, her mouth stiffened.
"What did you say to Rose?"
Victoria set down the lipstick hard. "Ryan, when you refused to let me participate in the treatment, you said I wasn't qualified. Now Rose has a problem, and I'm the first door you knock on." She crossed her arms. "Don't you find that ironic?"
"I'm not in the mood for word games." I stepped forward. "Rose's nervous system is already fragile. One wrong word could trigger her fear. Now, you need to tell me exactly what you said to her."
"I didn't do anything." Victoria spread her hands. "She's your patient. She had a breakdown under your care, and you come running to me. That's deflection. You can't accept the truth, so you're looking for a scapegoat."
"You—"
"Enough."
Ronan stood in the doorway, night air still clinging to his shoulders, exhaustion written across his face.
Victoria instantly changed her tune, rushing forward to grab Ronan's arm.
"Ronan, thank god you're back. Ryan says something happened to Rose.
I was rushing to check on her, and she blocked me in here, saying I caused it.
I haven't even been near Rose's door these past few days. What right does she have..."
"Stop twisting things!" I shot back. "I can stand up to any investigation. Can you?"
Victoria's face paled, but she straightened her spine. "Fine! Investigate!"
"Rose comes first." He made it final. "You two better figure out how to help her recover."
A piercing scream woke me. Rose thrashed violently on the bed, calling "Mommy" over and over, her voice going from shrill to hoarse. Even Luna was frantic, spinning in circles.
"Rose! Baby, I'm here!" No time to think. I lunged to the bed. Her hands flailed wildly, her legs kicked under the blanket, knees slamming the bed frame, sweat soaking the pillow. I couldn't hold her still.
"Get Ronan! Now!" I yelled at Emily, whose face had gone white.
"Mommy! Mommy!" This time Rose's cry was especially anguished. I didn't think twice. I pulled her close, murmuring, "Mommy's here. Mommy's right here."
Ronan rushed in, shirt half-buttoned, hair a mess. Hearing what I was saying, his expression turned complicated, but he didn't stop me.
Rose gradually stopped crying out, but things got worse. She'd hit the peak of a panic attack. One wrong move could cause her to stop breathing. I quickly had her lean into me. Ronan practically leaped to the bed in three strides, instinctively reaching to hold her.
"Don't!" I grabbed his arm. "Sit on her right side first!"
He followed my urgent command without hesitation, sitting on the edge of the bed. I could feel every muscle in his body coiled tight, his eyes full of helplessness.
"Press your palm against the back of her hand. Firm pressure. Slide your other hand slowly to below her chest, against her back. She needs to feel resistance. She needs to know someone's pulling her back from the edge."
Ronan did as I said. He leaned toward Rose, movements incredibly careful.
"Say her name. Don't stop."
"Rose." Ronan's voice came out. "Rose, Daddy's here. Rose."
I placed my palm on Rose's lower back from the other side. His palm and mine, separated only by this small child's body, left and right, our warmth almost meeting through her.
"Press in rhythm with her heartbeat. Slow. Now slow your own rhythm down. Help her calm."
His movements grew practiced, our rhythm synchronized. In that silent coordination, my heart unexpectedly settled. With him here, everything felt lighter.
Just as things were improving, the door flew open. Victoria rushed in.
"Rose, sweetheart, what's wrong? Let me hold you—"
Rose's body jerked up. Her small hand swung out and landed squarely across Victoria's face.
Victoria stumbled back, hand covering her cheek, disbelief flooding her eyes.
Ronan glanced at her. "Go rest. Ryan and I have this."
Victoria looked stricken. Hand still on her face, she silently retreated.
Ronan turned back. "What's next?"
"Keep going."
We stayed like that, one on each side of Rose's bed. Outside, the sky shifted from black to deep blue, deep blue to pale gray. Rose finally released all her tension and fear, sinking into deep sleep. The moment I looked up, my gaze met Ronan's gray eyes. Dawn reflected there, and so did I.