Chapter 29
Chapter Twenty-Nine
Ryan
Freezing rain hammered down on my face, blurring my vision. A dozen meters away, Nick's gun barrel stared straight at my forehead.
But I couldn't focus on the metal tube that could end me in an instant. All my attention was locked on the tall figure swaying in the center of that circle. Ronan was bleeding. God, so much blood.
He fought through thirty-some armed mercenaries. I could see every punch he threw, every kick—all deliberately pulled. He had openings to kill the bastards jumping him, but he only dislocated jaws instead.
He was trying not to kill. Because he'd promised me he'd live in the light.
I watched a blade sink deep into his left shoulder from behind. Ronan staggered, then hurled the attacker away with his other hand.
"Ronan!"
Christ, what had I done? I'd forced my standards onto a man who'd fought half his life in this world, made him pull his teeth at the worst possible time. This wasn't redemption. I was killing him.
"Touching, really. Made up your mind, Ronan?" Nick's gun stayed trained on me. "Don't stop now, or I'll make sure you regret it in hell."
Nick's finger curled around the trigger. Tightening.
Suddenly, nothing mattered anymore. Images flashed through my mind—Pedro rolling on the cabin floor, laughing at a yarn cat. Rose's clear voice calling my name. If Ronan died here tonight, with Nick this unhinged, none of us would survive.
But we'd just decided to start over.
I squeezed my eyes shut, waiting for death.
One second. Two. Three.
The gunshot never came. Instead, a roar erupted—something beyond human.
My eyes snapped open. Ronan stood again, like some blood-soaked demon. Blood poured from his shoulder, but he didn't seem to feel it.
He launched forward like a cannonball, pure murderous rage incarnate, slamming through two mercenaries. I recognized that Ronan from four years ago. No, this version was ten thousand times worse. He'd stopped holding back. His blade flashed silver arcs through the dark rain.
I stood frozen, legs filled with lead. My blood felt frozen by the slaughter. My stomach twisted violently. I watched him charge through pools of blood toward Nick.
Nick's composure shattered. He squeezed the trigger twice, panic-firing at Ronan.
Bullets grazed Ronan's arm. He didn't stop. He threw his knife, pinning Nick's wrist.
Next second, Ronan was on him. Up close, I finally saw what he'd become. Not an inch of clean skin left. Blood and rain dripped down his jaw. Worst were his eyes—those deep gray irises now completely overtaken by bulging red veins, nothing left but raw animal fury.
He grabbed Nick's collar, then slammed him into the concrete like a sack. Nick's skull cracked against the ground with a sickening thud. Ronan didn't give him a breath. He straddled Nick, left hand crushing his throat, pinning him down. His right fist rose and fell like thunder.
"You piece of shit pointed a gun at her!"
Ronan cursed with every punch, each one full force. Within seconds, Nick's face was unrecognizable. But Ronan didn't stop. Everyone around scattered, crawling away in terror.
The engine roars. Blinding high beams flooded the garage. Dozens in black coats poured out carrying heavy weapons, grabbing the runners.
"Secure the area! Anyone moves, shoot to kill!"
Marco's rough bellow cut through the rain. I snapped back from the nightmare. I wanted to pull Ronan off, but my legs wouldn't move. Marco's face went white at the scene. Declan jumped from another car, pupils contracting.
"Ronan! Stop! You'll kill yourself!" Declan and Marco lunged for him, screaming.
But Ronan heard nothing. Trapped in his own vacuum, the red in his eyes deepening, fists still pounding Nick's head.
"Vic...Victoria..."
Nick wheezed through his crushed windpipe. His bloodshot eyes fixed on Ronan, lips struggling to move.
"Then take that obsession with you to hell."
"Ronan!"
Ronan froze. Every muscle locked.
I clutched the car, fingernails digging into metal. The thick stench of blood and oil turned my stomach. I bent over, dry-heaving, bringing up nothing. My legs twitched, wanting to run from this horror.
But I didn't move. Because Ronan stood up. He turned slowly toward me.
He staggered forward. Each step left a bright red footprint in the puddles.
A dozen meters felt like crossing an eternity. Finally, he reached me. His legs gave out. He dropped straight into the mud and blood at my feet.
"Ronan..."
He didn't look up. His trembling hand wiped uselessly at himself, then caught the hem of my coat.
"I'm sorry...Ryan..."
"You must be terrified. I killed in front of you again...I turned back into that thug you're scared of. I really...couldn't control it."
"I tried so hard. I wanted to be clean. I wanted to stand next to you and Pedro in this town without shame..." His voice shook harder. "I did everything I could to keep my promise, not to scare you."
"But Ryan..." He finally raised his head slowly, rain-washed face twisted in agony. "When I saw that bastard point his gun at you, I couldn't. I couldn't just watch you die in front of me."
His bloodshot gray eyes filled with desperation and pleading.
"Please, Ryan. Don't leave me again because of this...Don't throw me back into that world without you. I'll die."
His grip on my coat tightened, voice dropping to rock bottom. "I swear this is the last time. All my threats are gone. It won't happen again. Please, don't go..."
He knelt there, bracing for me to run and abandon him again.
This man had nearly died following a promise he made to me. Then threw himself back into that bloody abyss without hesitation to save my life.
All my fear shattered in that moment. Tears flooded out like a broken dam, blurring my vision but clearing my heart.
I dropped to my knees and wrapped my arms around this trembling, blood-soaked demon.
"I'm not going anywhere!"
I buried my face in his neck, squeezing with everything I had, sobbing the words out loud. "Ronan Valerius, you complete idiot! I'm not going anywhere!"
"If Nick had fired, I'd rather die! But if you died here tonight keeping that damn promise, I'd never forgive myself!"
I cupped his blood-covered face, meeting his shocked eyes.
"I've been running. Four years of lying to myself. I thought I was scared of your world, scared of the blood on your hands."
I shook my head through tears, shouting the truth into the storm—four years too late.
"But tonight, watching you collapse in that blood, I finally understood. What's terrifying isn't the blood on your hands! It's the pain of losing you! Watching you die while I stand helpless—that's ten thousand times worse than any killing!"
I kissed the corner of his mouth. "I'm not afraid anymore, Ronan. Whatever you are, whatever you've done, whether you're a mob Don or a Palo Alto volunteer. I accept it all!" I locked eyes with him. "I accept your light and your darkness. I'm stuck with you for life!"
"Ryan..."
He finally stopped hesitating. He crushed me against him like he wanted to fuse me into his bones.
We held each other. The world could end and we wouldn't let go.
"Ronan!"
Declan rushed over, face showing unprecedented fear.
"Ryan, Ronan's lost too much blood. If we don't get him to a hospital right now, he won't make it till morning!"
I jolted awake. I tried to release him to check his wounds, but Ronan's arms locked around my waist like welded iron, refusing to budge.
"Don't go..." he mumbled incoherently in my ear. "Ryan...don't go..."
His weight grew heavier against me, his grip weakening, his body temperature dropping with the blood still flowing out. He was fading.
"Ronan, listen to me!"
I forced myself calm, cupping his face. In the gentlest but firmest voice I could manage, I made him a promise.
"Look at me. I won't leave you. Not today, not tomorrow, not ever." I kissed his freezing forehead. "But right now, you have to go to the hospital. You have to survive. Pedro's waiting for his bedtime story. Rose is waiting for you. I'm waiting. You understand?"
Ronan's unfocused pupils sharpened slightly. He stared into my eyes for a full five seconds.
Finally convinced this wasn't some dying hallucination, his arms around my waist loosened—inch by inch.
"Marco! Stretcher! Get him in the car now!" Declan screamed himself hoarse.
Marco rushed over, carefully lifting the semi-conscious Ronan onto the arriving ambulance.
I jumped in without hesitation, sitting beside him.
The cabin light was dim. Roy fumbled emergency treatment, cutting away his shredded shirt, pressing massive wads of gauze against those horrifying wounds.
Ronan's face was ashen. Eyes half-closed. Breathing barely detectable.
I clutched his hand, trembling all over, pressing it to my cheek as tears streamed down.
"Ronan...look at me, don't sleep, please don't sleep..."
"I love you...Ronan, I love you. Do you hear me? I love you..."