Chapter 3
CHAPTER THREE
LONDON
D amn , Alexander Grant is still just as yummy as I remember. Too hot to look directly at for too long, like the sun, but you don’t actually want to look away. Let it burn, baby. His black hair is a little shaggier than it was a few months ago, a constant tuft keeps falling into his eyes, with the back curling a bit against his neck.
He’s so my type physically. I love a man with broad shoulders and a tapered waist. Plus, he’s tall and chiseled without being bulky. Good god. But it’s his eyes, always teasing, dark, and mischievous, that drew me in, with lush lashes no man should have. Plus, that cheeky fucking grin.
It’s everything else about him that’s such a turnoff. He’s too damn cocky for my taste. Loud. Wrong. Something about him screams manchild. At the wedding, I’d wanted to forget everything and just live in the moment and no one else screams carpe diem quite like Alexander. Besides, it was New Year’s Eve and just days after my birthday. I just wanted to let go, have some slore fun, and leave it all behind me at the stroke of midnight. And boy, was he a good time. Long and thick, he’d filled me so completely, I still clench and moan at the memory of it. Maybe I should have considered a mantra of new year, new dick instead.
No, no. It was a weak moment. One I will absolutely not be repeating. Even as he looks at me in that way and you just know the sex will be just as good, if not better. From my experiences, few men can pull it off—the look or the sex—but Alexander’s a big nope for me. At least that smart mouth was good for something.
Pushing aside his so few positive traits, I feign nonchalance, keeping my eyes fixed on the door. My new friend, Kevin, went into the restroom thirty seconds ago and any minute now, Alexander is going to come storming through that door. Laughter bubbles in my gut at the image and I can’t wait. Checking my watch, I begin a countdown. Five... Four... Three… Two… One… I look up at the door and… nothing. What the hell?
So, I stand there, my eyes flicking between my watch and the restroom door for ten fucking minutes, when Kevin struts out, swiping his thumb along the corner of his mouth. Less than a minute later, Alexander follows with a smug smile, readjusting his pants.
What the hell! My stomach crashes to the sticky floor as Alexander's eyes lock with mine. Looking around frantically, my head is on a swivel as I search for an escape route before making a break for our table. Hopefully, he won't say anything with everyone around, but as I near the table, I curse under my breath. Of course, they're all gone. Fuck .
“Well, well, well,” he says as he saunters toward me. “It looks like someone is a dirty little liar who lies.”
Feigning innocence, I flutter my eyelashes. “Who, me?” I say, lifting a hand to my chest. “Whatever do you mean?”
“Don't play me. You told me you'd meet me in the restroom in five minutes and give me a blowy. That didn't mean I wanted someone else to.” He pouts.
My eyes practically fall out of their sockets as I gasp at his words. “Did I, though? Did I say I would blow you? If I recall, you said we had unfinished business and that couldn’t be further from the truth. I could say now you owe me for wasting my time. Either way, it looks like we’re even.” I shrug.
His eyes narrow as they study my face. “Fine. If this is how you want to play it. I have no problem allowing you to rack up IOUs and I will fucking cash in. And just so you know, your little prank backfired. He told me what was up as soon as he walked in. Dicks before chicks.”
With those parting words, he stalks away, and my eyes follow him until he’s swallowed up by the crowd. Crap . That is not how I intended my little jokey joke to go. Minutes later, a hand lands on my arm, snapping me back to the now.
“Hey.” Gem’s concerned face greets me as I turn to her and the girls. “Are you alright?”
Frowning, I nod. “Yes, you girls haven’t killed me yet.”
She laughs. “That’s not what I meant.” Her eyes flicker to Mia. “What did Xander say?”
Mia smirks, stepping closer as she looks down at her phone. “He said he saw you running to the restroom with the shits, and you texted him we should go ahead without you.”
“Actually, he said that you were having, and I quote, ‘a shitastrophe,’” Sasha adds.
My gaze ping pongs between Gem and Sasha's concerned gazes, to Mia’s wide smile, and before I know it, a peal of laughter bursts from my lips.
“Whaa… shitastrophe? In public?! ” I shudder. “My worst nightmare! I need to wash that thought away. Next round on me,” I yell, heading toward the bar. “To the shits!”
Their ringing laughter doesn’t ease the thoughts running through my mind. Where is that little jerk? I'm going to kill him.
Alexander is avoiding me. After his little retaliation, he and Drew wandered off without us and they’ve been holding court at the center bar since we arrived at our next stop. Flocked by a large group of girls, he laughs and jokes, passing out shots and having a grand ole time. Good. Maybe now he’ll stop pestering me for that blow job that he’ll never get from me. It’s not happening.
Turning back to the girls, Mia is lining up a row of shots for us and I have a feeling I’m not walking out of here on my own.
“Where’s Ty?” I ask Sasha.
“He and Elijah are back in the arcade. They’re done drinking. They said they’re on babysitting duty.”
“What little bores!” I say as we fall into each other. Well, maybe they aren’t wrong. This place is loose with the liquor and we’re enjoying some generous pours.
“We only have three more stops on our crawl, but this is always my favorite bar. Then I get to take that gorgeous man home,” she says dreamily. And as if on cue, Ty looks up, eyes zeroing in on his wife, and I notice the lift of his lips as he watches her. His eyes move to me, eyebrows raised, and I give him a big smile and a thumbs up.
“Alright, ladies!” Mia claps her hands and yells over the chaos. “I have two new shots for your tongues’ delight. Let’s get Shamrocked and sip our Green Tea!”
Gem and Sasha start a drumroll, tapping their fingertips on the table and I join in, loving the spectacle of today. This is so unlike me, but these charming girls bring out a side of me I long said goodbye to. The real London, the serious London, is back home, lonely but comfy in her pajamas, feet up with a glass of wine and a book. Nothing wrong with that, but this is so much fun.
“One, two, three!” I count down and taking my cue, we all get shamrocked. Fuck. I hold in my belch. I’m not a fan of dairy based drinks and I believe I have just made a fatal error. I laugh to myself. Maybe Alexander is clairvoyant, and the shits are coming.
“It’s not piping hot but sip your tea!” Mia yells, and I follow their lead, throwing back my shot glass.
Lowering my glass slowly, I focus on no sudden movements. I want to make sure everything stays where it’s supposed to, in my belly and not all over the floor, when something whips across my face. Pretending I’ve been slapped, my hands come up to my face and I yelp.
“Oh, sorry, London.” Gem giggles, offering me a squeeze as she bops to the music, that ponytail on the move again.
“It’s fine. I think I’m going to sit down for a second. I’ll be safe down here.”
She nods before she and Sasha start screaming when a new song begins playing. I wave them off as they try to pull me to the dance floor. No, I can dance just as well right here, in my chair, that’s not moving.
Mia sits beside me. “You guys go. I’ll stay here.”
Turning to her, I try for a smile. “You don’t have to. I’m fine.”
“No, no. At this stage of the game, it’s a buddy system. You’re stuck with at least one of us for the rest of the night.”
“Plus, the guys.” I lean in as I say.
“Exactly. And speaking of guys…” She points to Alexander, who’s pouring whiskey in a blonde’s mouth. “What’s up with you and Xander?”
I shrug. “Who knows. I don’t think he likes me very much.”
She tilts her head as she studies me. “Really? That doesn’t sound like him. Why do you think that?”
“We just don’t see eye to eye about a few things.” Mainly that he’s God’s gift to women.
She nods. “Okay, maybe we’ll come back to this topic later, after a few more drinks, but I’m ready to go dance. Let’s get you some water first?”
“Sure, let’s do it.” I let her pull me to my feet, the floor swaying a bit, and my legs suddenly heavy as cement blocks as we weave through the crowd to the bar. Along the way, I catch sight of my cousin and his wife, dancing like they’re all alone, eyes only for each other. Eli and Gem right beside them. They are so cute, I almost miss the little pang that hits me in the gut, but I brush it aside. Now is definitely not the time.
Saddling up to the bar, Mia snags the bartender’s attention and orders a water for me. I shoot him a grateful smile as he hands it over, and I close my eyes as I gulp it down. I’m not too proud to admit that I’m only standing because Sasha kept a bottle of water in front of me all day. Speaking of which, what time is it? Squinting at my watch, I close one eye. Four! It’s only four . Shit . Sasha said there are three more stops on the crawl and she’s leaving, but Mia said the party at the final bar goes late. Fuck me.
My head is cloudy, full of cotton wool as I turn to Mia to ask her about it, but she’s making out with a tall guy with red hair. I can’t see his face since she’s eating it. Yaasss, go Mia. Getting it in right here, at the bar, in front of everyone. I don’t think I could do it.
My ex-Travis was so anti-PDA, he barely held my hand in public. He didn’t do a lot of things in private either. But I’ve always thought it was so sexy when a man lets everyone know you were his, showering you with affection, and not giving a crap who sees.
Turning back to the dance floor, I place my elbows on the bar, watching the love birds again, and a sigh breaks free. I remember when I had that.
No, scratch that. I remember when I thought I had that. Travis and I were together for nearly a decade. He was practically my entire twenties. I don’t know exactly when things changed, but over the years, I slowly withered away. The best parts of me died under the burden of that love until I decided to fight and claw my way up from the nothing I’d become.
But I did it, and now I’m standing here strong, working on my happy . I’m still figuring out what that is, but this is a start. Time to get back to the old me, and what I want, and it starts with surrounding myself with the love and support of my family because I know I’m going to need it.
Fuck . Alcohol really is a depressant. Let me shake this shit off. Lifting my shoulders a few times, I take a couple deep breaths. I’m here to have a good time and forget about all the crap I ran from, escaped from, left behind. Whatever you want to call it. Alexander floats into my line of sight and I can’t stop my eye roll. He is as hot as he is annoying. Why can’t he get it through his head that he was a one and done?
Laughing to myself, I remember how horny I was at the wedding. I had this ridiculous notion to give into the romantasy of it all and gave myself permission to do something wild before I made some serious life changes. He and Drew were my only choices and Drew looked too sweet, and Alexander the fun fuck. So, I went for it, and I’ll never admit this to anyone else, but those were the most exhilarating ten minutes of my life. His face when the timer went off still lives rent free in my mind.
But that was the old me. The me of last year. Thirty-year-old me is ready to grab life by the ovaries. I don’t have time for distractions, and that’s just what he is. A beautiful damn distraction.
Making my way through the crowd, I lean into Alexander as I sway, to really sell it. Offering him a big bright smile, I place a hand on his chest. “ Gilbert , there you are, baby,” I slur, offering him a pout.
The blonde next to him screws up her face as she looks at him. “Gilbert? You told me your name was Xander.”
I snort. “He wishes. Gilbert is a family name, right, baby? It’s what we’re going to name our little boy,” I say, rubbing my belly as I turn to her. “Sorry, not sorry to break up this little party, but you should know, he fucked me in the bathroom.”
He splutters. “Wait, that was mont—”
“ Three bars ago.” I screw up my face and squeeze out a tear. Damn, maybe I should have been an actress. “You told me you loved me.” Hiccup.
“Seriously, what a jerk,” she says as she grabs my near empty glass and tosses the bit of water on his chest before throwing a thanks girl over her shoulder.
After my last little prank, I didn’t know if I should be angry or apologize. But the incredulous look on his face as he looks from her and back to me, his little brain not computing what just happened.
Now this, this feels right.
“You’re welcome, Gilbert. That would never have worked out between you two,” I say with a smile.
“Oh yeah,” he says, reaching around me for a napkin. “Why’s that?”
I shrug. “She seemed like a nice girl. Too nice for you.”
“Hmm.” He wipes at his shirt. “You’re ravishing when you’re jealous but let me put you out of your misery. You have nothing to worry about. Besides her not being my type, I’ve actually been trying to get the attention of this mouthy ass, dark-haired beauty.”
I step away, shrugging, avoiding eye contact and instead focusing on the lock of hair that’s fallen across his forehead. “You need a haircut.”
He reaches for me. “Stop running.”
But it’s too late. Snark, I can do all day. But this Xander… I don’t think so.
“Breadstiiicks!” Closing my eyes to belt that out from my diaphragm, I sway a little before righting myself with a laugh . Breadsticks for the motherfucking win. I caught my second wind after Gem and Sasha practically shoved delicious buttery breadsticks and garlic knots down my throat. Carbs are the devil, and I ask myself daily if they are worth it, but today, they are heavenly gifts from the gods.
Staring at myself in the restroom mirror, I run my fingers through my hair before replacing my headband. Alright, you’re holding up pretty well, I coach, wiping away the smudged eyeliner from under my eyes. It's been a long freaking day and exhaustion is riding me, but I'm going to make it to the last bar, even if the girls have to drag me or one of these boys tosses me over their shoulder.
Bending, I cup my hand under the water to rinse the disgusting combination of booze and garlic from my mouth. I wish I had my toothbrush. Ooh, I have mints. Popping one in, I swish a little water around my mouth. Finally feeling like I can speak to people without melting their faces off, I reapply my lip gloss. Giving my liver a little pep talk, you can do it, I fling open the door and come to an abrupt halt.
“Alexander.”
Turning to a girl in a hoodie, he winks at her. “Give us five minutes.”
She nods and moves to stand in front of the door as he pushes me back inside.
Sighing, I walk over to the sink, lean a hip against it, and cross my arms. Turning toward the mirror, I give my hair another fluff. “What can you do for me, Alexander?”
“Well, my mouth can't wait to play with your pussy again.”
Meeting his gaze in the mirror, I can’t stop the laughter from flying out. “That’s not happening, but I’m open…” His brows shoot up and I laugh again as I turn to him. “I’m open to a conversation to clear the air, especially since we’ll be seeing a lot more of each other.”
His eyes narrow as he considers my words. “What do you mean?”
“I’m surprised you haven’t heard. I’m moving here, to Chicago.”
Several emotions flash across his face in such a quick succession, I can’t process them all as his eyes widen, then narrow again as his jaw tightens, and I can practically hear the grinding of his teeth as he stares me down.
“You’re moving here?” His voice is flat, without inflection, as he stares at the wall over my left shoulder.
“Yes. I need a change and growth in my career and there are some amazing opportunities that I’m interested in here. So, I decided to come visit and start looking for a place.”
“What if none of these opportunities pan out?” His smirk irritates me, but I ignore his slight.
“Doesn’t matter. I want to be closer to my family and further my career, and I can do both of those things here.”
“Sure.” He nods slowly.
When he doesn’t add anything else, I try to prompt him. “What did you need to talk to me about?”
He scans my face again before his eyes shift away. “Nothing. Never mind. Good luck with everything.” Before I can respond, he’s thrown open the door and barrels out.
Standing there speechless, my gaze remains trained on the door he practically ran through. I don’t know what I was expecting but it wasn’t that.