Chapter 13 #3
He didn’t answer, but her words seemed to give him determination, for he went on to confide, “Or maybe if we were married, I would want you closer, and perhaps our married life would be like this.”
He drew the top of her dress down over her shoulders. Rising to his knees, he brought his hands around to feel her neck and the top of her chest through the material of her dress and chemise. His hands shook, but it was hardly noticeable.
“I am pleased,” he said, “that you wear this necklace that holds the white shell earrings I gave you. It brings me great honor to see you wear it here.” His fingers trailed down the path between her breasts.
By mutual consent, they pushed against each other, she leaning back, he holding her and showering her neck, her cheek, her ear with kisses.
“You smell so good.” He nuzzled his face against her hair.
“I could get lost in the scent of your hair, in the fragrance of your skin. But come, though I wish to linger here forever, I must finish my task and undo the rest of these buttons, or I fear we will never leave this tent. And unfortunately for me, there is much yet to do this night.”
“Red Hawk,” she said, her voice soft, not more than a murmur, “I feel vulnerable, and I so desire you to—”
Rip-p-p.
Another button tumbled to the ground. His fingers trembled at her back.
“Excuse me,” he proffered by way of explanation.
She simply smiled dreamily, enchanted with him, with his clumsiness, with the entire process. The dress could be fixed, but this moment was forever.
He inhaled deeply, exhaled harshly, and the last of her buttons came loose. “’Tis done.”
“Yes, thank you.” She tugged on the dress, pulling her arms out of the sleeves. It exposed the top of her chemise.
“You wear many clothes.”
“Yes, I do.” She inhaled with a gulp, as his fingertips trailed down over each of her arms.
“You will have to remove them all, if you hope to journey with me this night. For they, too, are full and will catch on many bushes and thorns, giving away our passage through this country. Do you require my assistance any further?” He followed the statement with a kiss against the back of her neck, while one of his hands massaged a sensitive spot there.
A soft sigh escaped her throat.
“If we were married, I could do this every night.” He kissed every bit of her bare skin, there at her neck, her shoulders, her back.
“But what else would we do?”
She felt him swallow, hard.
“Much more,” he said. “However, I remind you that the others, who camp close to us, are not yet asleep. Do you wish me to show you more of what we might do? Here, now?”
“I…I…” Why couldn’t she speak? “I don’t… I suppose not…but…”
“Do not worry, once we are away from here, and it is determined that we are in safe country, you might ask me again. If you do, we might be able to more deeply indulge.” His lips teased a trail of kisses along her shoulders.
“Red Hawk.” She turned her face toward him. “What’s happening to me? To us?”
“Do you seek the truth?”
“Yes, I think so.”
“I can only tell you what is true for me. Perhaps you feel the same way I do, I do not know.”
“Yes?”
“Love,” he said simply.
“Love?”
He nodded. “I am falling in love with you. Although, if I am to be truthful, perhaps I have loved you since the moment I first saw you.”
Such simple words, and yet so stunned was she by his honest confession, she was speechless. She wondered, was she falling in love with him?
Involuntarily, one image after another filled her mind.
A young boy playing with her in the water, teasing her, yet keeping her lonely self company. A soulful wish from the bottom of her heart to see the same boy again. That this man had recently come to her aid, when no one else would, endeared him to her.
Interrupting her thoughts, he said, “Now you must dress. I will not be able to help you with your clothes any further, however. I must prepare for our journey. Do you think you can manage it on your own?”
“Yes,” she whispered. “But I would like you to stay.”
He sighed. “I cannot. You know I cannot. If I stay, it is natural for me to try to urge more passion from you, and I fear, because we both are aware of our desire for each other, you might let me succeed.”
“Is it so very bad? I have some friends who often indulge—”
“Without marriage, I would disgrace you. As it is, I fear I may have already pushed you too far.”
“Too far?”
“It is well known that a woman, when she desires a man, can lose concept of where she is and who she is with, if a man takes her too far into passion. ’Tis why a girl, after a certain age, is guarded so greatly by her parents and her aunts.
When a man truly loves a woman, it is up to him to stop the love making, if he can.
Sometimes, though, he too goes too far and cannot pull back. For now, I can walk away.”
For the second time this evening, Effie was astonished by this man’s wisdom. Not knowing what to say or how to respond, she remained silent.
“I will meet you at the river as soon as you are dressed in my clothes.”
She dipped her head in agreement, then whispered, “Very well.”
No sooner had the words been uttered than he was gone.