Chapter 2 #2
Which was beyond hard at the moment, but I could try.
I moved over to him and pet his plastic wing. “I’m sorry. Really. I know you’re trying to help me.”
“I’ve never been a spirit guide before,” he whispered. “I just wanted to help you, child. Maybe I wasn’t the right one.”
Shit. I needed the help.
“How about you tell me how you see things. I know it’s not law or the rules but your perspective, and over time I can find my own perspective and beliefs,” I offered after a few moments of mulling.
“Yes, good, that could work. I warn you that my analogy is a bit odd.” He waited until I nodded. “Have you ever seen the old I Love Lucy episode where they work the candy conveyor line and start picking up chocolates?”
“No, but I know the reference. They get overloaded and can’t package fast enough, so they start eating them instead,” I mumbled, my eyes going wide. “The gods are going to eat me?”
“No, no, nothing that horrible,” he chuckled. “It’s that visual of the conveyor line.”
I think I understood where his head was and pulled up a quick video clip of a cartoon movie where newborn babies were moving along a conveyor for storks to pick them up and take to their families.
“Yes, yes, that is the visual I have always had,” he said.
“But souls. The souls of humans, witches—any being coming into existence before being born. However they come about. It seems silly, but I saw it this way. The Fates gave them their fate—the process. There has to be some process, and our powerful gods would have something organized.”
I wasn’t sure I agreed with that given the amount of chaos in the world and how off the rails so much always seemed to go, but I could understand organizing that in his mind.
“You are not a goddess witch in the way you are to be worshipped as a junior goddess or Bé?inn’s prodigy.
The teachings were all written by outsiders—jealous and greedy outsiders.
Always remember that.” Again, he waited until I nodded.
“You were blessed like a godmother would bless a child, Bevin. She blessed you.”
I considered that, slowly nodding. “It seems like semantics, but I also see the humbleness of it.”
“Exactly.”
“Okay, back to how you see the process,” I told him when he seemed to hesitate.
“Again, I don’t have all of the answers.
This is what I’ve put together from what I’ve learned, and I could be wrong, but it’s enough to help you,” he warned.
“However it happens, your soul is formed and you join that conveyor belt as a witch to be born. Your soul already having some characteristics as they all have to be different.”
“Makes sense,” I accepted.
“Then the Fates decide certain… Whatever. Who you are born to. How long you will live. Certain attributes of your life—whatever your beliefs.”
“Okay.” I wasn’t sure I believed that, but… I couldn’t provide proof to say it was wrong, so fine.
“From there, some souls catch the eyes of gods,” he explained.
“Something in them sparks interest. Some have described it as picking champions, but that’s really demeaning it as choosing horses for the race of life.
It is nothing that petty and horrible. Bé?inn didn’t pick you to be her champion for some quest and certainly isn’t placing bets for you to win some race. ”
“That’s comforting,” I mumbled, rubbing my arms as I hugged myself. “So Bé?inn saw something in my fate and blessed me? She basically liked what my soul could be?”
“That’s how I’ve seen it.” He cleared his throat. “Normally.”
I sighed. “And I bet that’s where you tell me I’m different and why I have multiple blessings, right? This is going to be the bad part?”
“I’m sorry, child,” he whispered.
“Might as well just tell me,” I mumbled, bracing for impact. I swallowed loudly as he did. It took me a few minutes to digest what he said, not caring that people were waiting on me or freaking out.
It honestly left me with one question.
“How much can I tell people?”
He flinched, which was the only way I could tell he was shocked with the stupid sunglasses. “You are forbidden from speaking any truths that could hurt others like you. That is the rule.”
“Besides my priest even if he’s not forever?” I clarified.
“The information will have to be taken from him if you separate from him. If he flees with it—you won’t be punished for that.” His meaning hit me hard and I swallowed loudly.
“But I can be punished?”
He slowly nodded. “As any godmother or adult figure will a child they care for. Gifts can be given and taken away. You will find some like you who have lost their powers.”
I let out a slow breath. “Speak plainly. I prefer the blunt truth even if it hurts or I have to suffer to shoulder it. Let’s not have any misunderstandings later.”
“Good, good,” he whispered sadly. “If you misuse gifts, they will be taken away. If you do well with the gifts and power you have, more can be granted to you and not just by Bé?inn. It’s not a promise. The gods are busy and don’t watch you like their job.”
“So don’t expect more and do the best I can with what I have. But to make sure if they check in they’ll be pleased with me,” I muttered, nodding when he did. “When can I find you here again?”
“I will wait here for you to always guide you, child.”
I frowned. “That’s horrible for you. No, that’s not—”
“That is the choice I made so you are not alone in this, Bevin,” he said gently. “There will come a day when you won’t need me and I’ll move on to what’s next. For now, I accept it.” He smiled a bit. “I look forward to when you bring color to this place.”
Yeah, I needed him to explain that, though I had a guess it was magic.
I was right. Gray meant that area didn’t have magic, and everything would look completely different once the land was full of magic.
“Can I get a key for my home? See what I’m working towards or…” I wasn’t really sure what to ask.
“That key works for any location once you hit a certain level of power. You received multiple as a gift and help to know you were on the right path,” he hedged, sounding a bit confused.
So we were at the level of his understanding again.
“Could you wait for me at my house once I know how to access there?”
“Oh yes,” he agreed. “I would love to visit there again.”
I did a double take, a million more questions on the tip of my tongue, but he hurried me to go. I asked about how to leave safely, and he told me to cloak but no one would see me leave out a door of the tree or anything. I would simply appear in front of them.
But always by that tree if I wasn’t careful… So, to be careful.
Fair enough.
I came out of the spirit realm with a gasp, quickly moving away from the tree before I took off the cloaking.
I met Mrs. Reid’s concerned gaze. “Call a meeting with all the council and all the spouses or family who know about me. No more games or I cut them all off.” I didn’t wait for her to answer before facing Taylor.
“Time to pick a side. The council’s or mine. We’re there.”
“I’ve always been clear from the beginning where my side is, Bevin,” he said firmly. “It’s my family’s, but you’re on the same side even if my dad is the head of the council.”
“I hope you’re right, but I don’t have enough faith in people he can control others and it might come to that.
” I wasn’t going to debate him about that and turned to Emma.
“I’m sorry. I didn’t…” I licked my lips.
“I can’t tell you what happened, but I didn’t know the result.
I’m sorry. I wouldn’t—” I gasped when she just hugged me. “Thanks.”
“I can take all of Taylor’s barking. It’s fine,” she rasped. “Thank you for telling me you were fine. I’m a bit freaked, Bev. You’re my buddy now too, okay?”
I hugged her back. “I got answers. I wish I could tell you, but I can’t. That was made clear to me.” I pulled away and looked at my phone. “I need to talk to someone before this meeting and we throw down. I…”
“You got answers and know what to do. Got it. Don’t—you don’t owe anyone answers, Bev,” she said gently as she tucked my hair behind my ear.
“No, I do if people are willing to protect and help me,” I muttered but then sighed.
“But the line was fair too.” Then I thought about what I was told and made a decision.
“I can’t tell anything about being a goddess witch because it could hurt other goddess witches or god warlocks.
Clearly, even the council knowing is a problem.
“So it’s going to be frustrating and challenging for me, but if I want help and answers—real and actual answers, I can’t tell.
And I can be punished for risking others.
” I shrugged, ignoring all of their shocked expressions.
I pulled out my phone and made the call I needed to, glad when he immediately answered.
“I need to have a real conversation with you even if I’m not ready. ”
What else was there really to say?