13. Chapter 13
Chapter 13
Roxie
Never in my life have I found something as attractive about a man as I did when Lennox was reading to Ivy in silly voices. He wasn’t embarrassed, and he put in more effort than I’ve seen from him since we moved in. Those little glimpses I’ve seen turned into a whole damn vision before my eyes, and I had to hold back my emotions watching the two of them.
I’m not even sure why it got to me so much. Maybe it’s because Ivy’s father never wanted to be in her life, and I didn’t think she would ever get to have a male figure actually care about her. I don’t feel like she’s lacking, but seeing them together made me see what could be. It made my chest hurt, and now here I am, hours later, still thinking about it.
A knock at my door startles me. I know immediately it’s not Ivy because she would barge in, so that leaves Lennox.
Panic seizes my chest as I jump out of bed, not thinking about anything other than making sure he’s okay. Yanking the door open, I find a wrecked Lennox. He looks like he hasn’t slept in days.
“Lennox?”
“Umm.” His brows furrow. He looks so damn lost it makes my heart ache for him.
No. He is your client, Roxanne Grace Moore.
“What do you need?” I’ll do just about anything to help this man.
That’s how I end up lying in my bed with Lennox Hutton.
Once he’s settled, I curl up under the blankets. Looking back at him, I open my mouth to say something, anything, but his soft snores reach my ears.
Good, good, he’s sleeping. That’s what he needs.
He falls asleep easily, but it’s much harder for me. I listen to his breathing and think about the heart-wrenching scream I heard from him earlier.
I’d pushed him too hard. It’s all on me. I spent the rest of the day trying to find the words to make things better, to make it right with him, but I came up empty.
When he said he needed a break, I should have taken that to mean he needed to be done. Lord knows he’ll push through pain to prove he can do something. The second he said stop, we should have been done.
And it led to him breaking down. I can’t even do my job correctly. How can I really help him when I seem to be making things worse?
Lennox shifts in his sleep, and I freeze. When he rolls over, his arm lands on my middle. I blow out a steady stream of breath, praying I don’t wake him up while simultaneously feeling a level of comfort I didn’t expect. The weight of his arm, even through the blankets, feels too good. His warmth consumes me, and my eyes start to droop. I try to stay awake because if there’s one thing I know about keeping professional boundaries, it’s that falling asleep in the same bed as your patient is a huge no-no.
It’s no use, though. Sleep catches up to me before I can even think about getting out of this situation.
Waking up gives me a weird sense of loss.
Looking around, I realize it’s because Lennox is already gone. Well, I need to shut this line of thinking down ASAP.
I finally drag myself out of my room, thankful Ivy hasn’t come in to crash with me. Making my way to the kitchen for some much-needed coffee, I stop in my tracks when I see Lennox and Ivy laughing about something, with breakfast from Grind Time laid out on the table.
“And then Owen told Sandy she stinks.” Ivy giggles.
“Well, that’s not very nice of him. I hope you told him to be nicer to his friends.” Lennox’s furrowed brow is adorable as he navigates the kindergarten playground drama, and his response shocks the hell out of me. The way Ivy gravitates to him makes my heart swell in my chest.
Being a silent observer to this little interaction sounds wonderful, but I know I need to step in and make sure Ivy doesn’t get super attached to him. Should probably worry about yourself first.
“Good morning, Bug. Lennox.” I nod to them both. I’m not sure how to react to Lennox, so I figure the best approach is to act like it didn’t happen and follow his lead.
Lennox sits up straight as Ivy bounds off her chair and hugs me.
“Sleep good?” I ask her.
“So good!”
“I had Oakley drop off breakfast.” Lennox’s voice sounds unsure. When I take a peek at him from under my lashes, he has a mix of embarrassment and determination on his face, and I’m not sure what to make of it.
“Thank you.”
Ivy and I join Lennox at the table as he slides a coffee over my way. I greedily take a sip, sighing at the subtle vanilla flavor.
When I meet his eyes across the table, there’s a heat lingering below the surface, barely discernable through all the emotions he’s wearing on his sleeve, but I see it.
This kind of reaction was not what I was expecting after yesterday. After our PT session, he was stubborn. Prideful. But I understand why he immediately went to that. The frustration is overwhelming, but what I didn’t want was him to hurt himself more because he was too caught up in his head. Add in our sleepover, and he looks surprisingly well adjusted … while I feel lost on how to move forward.
“So, I was thinking...” He clears his throat, looking shy for the first time since I’ve met him. “My siblings and I have a family dinner every week. It’s a way to catch up with life and make our favorite foods.”
He pauses, and my mind races. A tradition like that is something I could only dream of for Ivy, and it makes me immensely sad that I haven’t been able to provide that kind of stability for her.
“Usually, it’s at Ledger’s house, but I’d like to host it here if that’s okay with you.”
“Oh! Of course! Ivy and I can head to Sal’s for dinner. Text me when you’re done.”
He stares at me for a moment before my words click.
“No! No, what I meant was I would like to host family dinner here, with both of you. Staying. Joining us. ”
I tilt my head in confusion because I’m not sure what this means. We aren’t family or really anything to him, and my mind wonders if this is connected to last night.
No, being desperate for sleep after a hard day does not equate to anything more.
“Yes! I can meet your bwothers?” Ivy cuts in.
“Well, I have one brother and two sisters, but they all have partners, so it’s a little more crowded than it used to be. You’ve already met Willow at Grind Time.” Lennox gives her his full attention.
“That’s cool. I love Willow!” She takes a bite of the donut in front of her.
“You can say no if that’s too much. You’ve met most of them, I think, but it still gets a little crazy.” He glances over at me.
I should say no. The smart thing to do is to say no.
“That sounds wonderful. Thank you for inviting us.” I smile.
Mentally, I’m smacking myself. I’m supposed to stay fucking professional, and at the first chance, I throw that all away. Not to mention, letting Ivy get a taste of how a family is supposed to work will only highlight how messed up ours is.
Too late now. Lennox’s face lights up brighter than I’ve ever seen, and it’s one hell of a sight.
Lennox said someone would be bringing food, but it’s like I’m a chicken with my head cut off. I feel like a terrible host as I double-check what’s in the refrigerator and find it shockingly bare. Need to get some damn groceries in here too.
“I promise everyone is bringing everything. Don’t worry about it,” Lennox yells from the couch.
“Okay, how’s this?” Ivy struts out of her room wearing hot pink leggings, a rainbow tutu, and a T-shirt with a roaring dinosaur on it.
“Looks awesome, Bug.” I smirk. The girl will wear what she wants, regardless of what I tell her, so it’s easier to just go with the flow.
“I like the T-shirt.” Lennox holds out his fist for a fist bump, and she happily complies.
The front door flies open, and my hand instinctually flies to my chest .
“Hello, hello!” a woman calls out.
“Hi!” I wave in a choppy motion as the woman rushes into the kitchen, holding a tray of food.
“You must be Roxie; I’ve heard so much about you! I’m Ainsley, Ledger’s fiancée.” She hugs me without a second thought.
“It’s nice to finally meet you. I think you’re the only one I haven’t had the pleasure of meeting yet.” I pull back with a chuckle.
“Work has been fucking swamped; otherwise, I would have been over here days ago. Sorry!” She rolls her eyes.
“Ains, give her a breather,” Ledger says as he sidles up next to her, dropping off a case of seltzers. “Sorry, she’s mad that she’s the only one who hasn’t met you yet and feels left out.” He winks.
“Well, sorry someone had to keep our business running,” Ainsley snarks before bumping him with her shoulder.
“Hi, I’m Ivy, and I’m fivey!” Ivy comes bounding into the kitchen.
“Well, Miss Ivy, I’m so happy to finally meet you. I’ve heard you’re taking Bluebell Falls by storm.” Ainsley kneels down.
“It’s sunny out; there’s no storm.” Ivy’s brow furrows, and I hide my chuckle behind my hand.
“Umm, yep, you would be right about that. I love your outfit; did you pick it out yourself?” Ainsley moves on without skipping a beat, and I love how she’s interreacting with my daughter.
Their conversation continues as Ledger pulls me aside. “How’s he doing?” His voice is quiet so we aren’t overheard.
“Really good. Making great progress, and he’s right on track,” I say brightly. Could I tell him about Lennox’s breakdown? I could, but I won’t. The trust Lennox put in me to be here means I won’t betray him like that. I definitely won’t tell Ledger about last night’s situation—that’s a surefire way to lose my job.
“Shit-talking already, Ledg?” Lennox asks from across the kitchen, his mask firmly in place. The generic smile on his face fools no one, but he is willing to push the issue, it seems.
“Curse Word Jar!” Ainsley says out of nowhere.
Ledger laughs harder than I’ve ever seen, but that’s not saying much.
“Umm…” I can’t think of a response.
“Sorry, my nephew started it when he was little, and it’s ingrained in me now around kids.” Ainsley cringes.
“Mommy says adult words all the time. It’s okay,” Ivy oh-so-helpfully chimes in.
“And now that we’ve established what kind of parent I am, how can I help with dinner?” My attempt to move on causes everyone to laugh.
“Someone want to help me grab this shit out of the car?” another female voice yells from the front door. I don’t know everyone well enough to place voices yet, but I have a feeling that will change today.
“Coming!” Ledger yells and quickly walks to help.
When he comes back, Willow, Oakley and he have their arms loaded with not only dinner but heaps of grocery bags too.
“We’re stocking up the food. It’s become habit whenever one of us is over here,” Willow says as she passes me, placing some bags on the island before she leans in for a hug. “I’m glad you’re joining us today.”
It’s right this minute that I realize how Lennox has secluded himself from everyone, including his family. Making a habit of bringing groceries over means he isn’t leaving at all, and if they don’t bring them, he doesn’t have them. It’s not just because of the latest surgery; this is an ingrained routine now.
“Good to see you, Roxie. Ivy, how’s it going today?” Oakley asks, holding out his knuckles to her. We’ve gotten to know these two pretty well purely from how many times we’ve been to Grind Time for treats and coffee in the last week.
She taps his knuckles with hers as she beams at being a part of the conversation. “It’s good. I’ve been pwaying a lot of games. You want to pway with me?”
“Absolutely.” Oakley takes the hand she’s holding out as she drags him to the living room, where she has three board games laid out.
“You don’t have to play with her!” I call out as they walk away.
“Yeah, I’m not telling this girl no.” Oakley chuckles.
My heart pounds in my chest at the easy support this family is freely giving. I don’t have time to dwell on it, though, because Rina and the sheriff come walking through the door. They share a secret smile as he grabs her ass in front of everyone, and envy floods my veins. I’ve never had someone look at me that way, and I most likely won’t ever have it either.
“Hey, everyone. Roxie, good to see you. Where’s Oakley at? I have to update him on those hikers,” Arlo asks the group.
Willow tosses her thumb over her shoulder, and Arlo walks away without another word. I’ve learned he only talks when he has something to say, so his abrupt departure doesn’t faze me.
“So, Ledg, whose favorite are you making today?” Lennox asks as he starts putting groceries away slowly. His mobility on the crutches is already miles better, and he’s doing good with limiting the weight he’s putting on his leg. I’m still watching him like a hawk, though.
“Well, I asked a little birdie what her favorite food was, and she said ‘pasketti’, so that’s what we’re making.” Ledger smiles over at me.
I stand stock still, in shock at how thoughtful this sweet family is. To my horror, tears well up in my eyes, and I swallow a couple of times, hoping it shoves the tears down.
“Shit, was that the wrong thing to do? We always pick someone’s favorite, and because you both are new, I thought it would be a good welcome to Bluebell Falls.” Ledger’s voice is panicked, and I wish so badly that I could comfort him, but the tears won’t cooperate.
“It’s good. So, so good,” I barely get out through my tight throat before I smile and hold up my hand for them to give me a minute.
I book it to my room as the tears start to fall. I don’t know what I did for this sweet family to include us like they are, but I’m not sure how to handle it. I’m thankful Oakley is distracting Ivy, though, because she definitely wouldn’t understand my freakout .
A couple of minutes later, I’m calmed down enough to head back out when a knock on my door sounds.
“It’s the girls,” one of them says.
I clear my throat. “Come in.”
Ainsley, Willow, and Rina walk in with concerned looks on their faces.
“I’m fine, really. I’m sorry.”
“Don’t apologize,” Ainsley says as she as she sits on the edge of the bed.
“I just got overwhelmed.” I chuckle, trying to play it off.
“Totally understandable. We’re very overwhelming as a group,” Willow adds.
“We forget not everyone has a huge get-together every week where it’s loud and messy, and we just threw you into the fire.” Rina cringes.
“It’s more about how accepting you all are,” I tell them honestly. I don’t want to talk about the whole sordid story about my upbringing or the subsequent years of protecting Ivy from my family, but I need them to know it’s not them. “Ivy and I haven’t really had a lot of support, and something as simple as asking my daughter what her favorite meal is so you can cook it for something called family dinner is … fucking amazing,” I whisper the last part.
“Well, if it counts for anything, Ivy already has Oakley and Arlo wrapped around her finger, so I would venture to say you’re both a great addition to the crew.” Rina smiles warmly at me.
I sit back with a sigh and wipe my eyes one last time. “She tends to make friends with anyone, so I’m not shocked.” I chuckle.
“Lennox is looking good,” Ainsley shifts subjects, and I’m grateful .
“He’s working hard so far. It’ll be a long process, but he seems to be following directions well,” I offer, my clinical voice coming out. He looks good today because he actually slept last night.
The three women look at each other with eyebrows raised—a secret conversation I’m not privy to, but I get the feeling Lennox following directions isn’t commonplace.
“Well, we wanted to check on you. We’re all very happy you are both here, and if you need a break from the chaos that are the Huttons, we completely understand,” Ainsley says. I sense she’s the matriarch of the group, although I assume we’re all relatively close in age.
“I appreciate it, really.” Standing up, I wait for them to join me as we walk back to the kitchen.
I spot Ivy scolding Arlo and Oakley as they try to play Candy Land by her rules. My lips roll inward in an attempt to not laugh. Ivy would surely yell at me for laughing at her very serious game if her face is anything to go by.
I can feel Lennox’s eyes follow me as I rejoin everyone, but I can’t make eye contact with him. If I do, I’ll see past the mask he has on, and my emotions are a little too close to the surface right now.
“So, how can I help?” I ask Ledger, ready to put my freakout behind me.