Chapter One
Mayfair, London
Juliana glanced at all of her black and lavender dresses, which would get packed away in trunks and placed in the attic.
The thought of never having to wear those colors again brought her immense joy.
Her mourning period over the last year had been the lowest point in her life.
She had never felt more lonely and unsure about what to do with her future.
Her marriage to Edward may have lacked the passionate love of a besotted husband and wife, but they found contentment in their one year of marriage.
Juliana closed her eyes, recalling the day that the magistrate informed her of her husband’s passing.
He had been in the wrong place at the wrong time when a carriage struck him while he was out on his walk around the square.
The carriage was transporting her friend Marina’s father, and they lost both men to the accident.
“My lady, should I keep any of these out for you?” her lady’s maid asked.
“No, Bonnie, please pack them all away. I can’t stand the sight of them anymore.”
She still grieved for Edward. He was her dearest friend, and she would always miss him.
A year of mourning gave her a long time to think about her future.
Granted, she hadn’t been alone the entire time.
Her friends Tabitha and Hannah frequently stayed with her and told her of all the latest on dit out in society.
While in mourning, she did not attend ton events and remained alone except for when her friends visited.
Her other two friends making up their group of five, Diana and Marina, both married last season and they had shared many details about married life.
Since young ladies weren’t told anything of what it meant to be intimate with a man, the ladies had sought such information from Juliana when she married.
Unfortunately, she had no information to give them, so she had to pretend to be too squeamish to speak of it.
While she avoided their questions, she was relieved when Diana and Marina could impart the details that Tabitha and Hannah so desperately sought.
If Juliana were honest with herself, she found the details quite intriguing, too.
She was overwhelmed by the profound love and passion she saw in her friends’ marriages. Hers certainly hadn’t been as such.
She guessed the key difference there was they had married for love, and she had married for convenience, and for friendship.
Although she wasn’t even sure if she wished to marry again at all.
Her mother had broached the subject with her, and she dismissed her questions.
She was just coming out of mourning, and it was far too soon to think about taking another husband.
She would just be thankful to be back out in society and able to attend events again, even if she would miss having Edward at her side.
Besides, she didn’t need to marry again if she didn’t wish to.
Edward ensured she had funds and property to live more than comfortably.
She had to remove her things from the entailed estate of his country home so his distant cousin, the new viscount, could take up residence, but their townhouse hadn’t been entailed and he left it to her.
Juliana had yet to meet the new viscount and wasn’t certain if he would attend the season.
She wasn’t sure how it would feel to address a man who wasn’t Edward as Viscount Gordon.
“We must get you dressed for the ball tonight, my lady,” Bonnie said, cutting through Juliana’s thoughts.
“Indeed.” She had selected an emerald-green ball gown for the event.
Out of mourning, she could wear other colors again, and as a widow, she wasn’t limited to the pastels and light colors that the bright-eyed debutantes were expected to wear.
At the young age of newly one-and-twenty, she would likely be the youngest widow in attendance.
The ton would be curious to see how she fared after her mourning period, so she expected she would spend most of her evening out on the dance floor.
Spending the night dancing would suit her just fine.
She could use an enjoyable evening away from the confounds of the townhouse she had shared with Edward, confused about what her future might hold.
Once she dressed for the evening, she waited for Hannah and her brother, Hudson, to arrive. They were escorting her to the Southam ball this evening. Tabitha’s parents were the hosts for Juliana’s first ball back in society.
Her butler, Drummond, informed her the carriage had arrived out front and she stepped outside just as Hudson, the Earl of Onslow, exited the carriage to hand her up. He became the earl a few years ago when his parents passed unexpectedly, leaving him as Hannah’s only guardian.
“It’s good to have you back out in society with us, Juliana,” Hudson said after they settled into the carriage.
“I quite agree,” Hannah said, seated next to Juliana. Hudson was seated across from them. “It’s sure to be a crush this evening. I hope you don’t grow weary from all the dancing.”
“I look forward to it, even if I am just a bit nervous,” Juliana replied. “If I had to sit in that townhouse for any longer, I might have been sent to Bedlam.”
Hannah patted her hand, and they rode in silence the rest of the way until they reached the Southam townhouse.
Hudson handed both of the ladies down and escorted one on each arm to the receiving line.
Tabitha’s parents, Lord and Lady Southam, greeted Juliana with a warm welcome, and before she knew it, she was being announced and ushered into the ballroom.
She was the Dowager Viscountess Gordon. She still hadn’t grown used to being addressed as such.
She closed her eyes thinking of Edward for a moment, then blinked them open, ready to face the watchful eyes of society.
After so many months of quiet, part of her was excited for the noise and chatter of the ton.
They each grabbed a drink from the tray of a passing footman and found a place at the side of the ballroom to watch the other dancers.
Their friend, Matt, the Earl of Wilton, found them and joined in the conversation.
Along with Hudson, he was among the gentlemen who looked after their group of friends.
With some married now and remaining in the country for the season, the group was smaller than it used to be.
Matt was the most jovial of their set, and almost always wore a smile on his face. “Juliana, might I have you first dance back out with us?” he asked.
“I’d enjoy that,” she responded, flashing him a wide grin.
He escorted her to the dance floor just as the first strains of a country dance rang throughout the ballroom. “Are you feeling all right being back out among the rest of society?” he asked in between the lively steps.
“Indeed. I’m so looking forward to the season.” That was an understatement. She had already felt more like herself being out among her friends.
“I’m glad. We were all quite worried about you.”
She smiled at him. “That’s kind of you all. I am quite all right, I assure you. It was tragic, indeed, and I will never stop mourning Edward, but it is time that I get on with my life.”
He nodded, and they continued on with the dance. Once it ended, he escorted her back to their group of friends. With her hostess duties complete, Tabitha had joined their group.
“Have you heard the new Viscount Gordon is in town?” Tabitha asked, leaning close to her and lowering her voice. “I’m told he’s nothing like dear Edward. Rather cold and cruel, actually.”
Juliana’s stomach tightened at the mention of Edward’s title passing to another. “I haven’t met him yet. I suppose I shall have to at some point.”
With any luck, she would never have to see the man. She was in possession of her own funds, so she needed nothing from him.
“Well, let’s hope he leaves you be. It sounds as if he is a horrid sort,” Hannah said, linking arms with Juliana. “You will let us know if you require assistance, right? I hate that you are alone now.”
A gentleman approached before she could reply and focused his attention directly on Juliana.
“My lady. Might I have your next dance?”
Baron Lygon stood before her with his hand extended.
He had never asked her to dance in her first season.
The baron was a bit older, around thirty, and had a reputation for avoiding marriage.
He was quite handsome, with his rich black hair and deep chestnut eyes.
His muscular frame didn’t go unnoticed by many women of the ton, either.
His breeches were currently not hiding the shape of his taut legs.
What was perhaps a bit more surprising, was how she had noticed such things.
“Of course, my lord. I would be delighted.”
Once they reached the center of the ballroom floor, he wrapped his arm around her back and pulled her closer than he should have. “I am glad to see you back in society, my lady.”
“Thank you, my lord.”
The dance began, and she noted that he was a graceful dancer. She had always enjoyed dancing and quickly fell into a comfortable rhythm with the handsome man.
“I hoped we might become better acquainted if you are open to such an arrangement. You must be quite lonely after your mourning period for Gordon.”
“What arrangement would that be, my lord?” She wasn’t certain what the gentleman was asking of her, but his expression was almost wolfish.
He flashed her a wide smile. “A pleasurable one.”
Her cheeks flushed, and she knew she must have turned several shades darker. “I see.” She knew widows engaged in such entanglements, but she hadn’t considered doing so herself.
“Forgive my forwardness, my lady. I only hoped to gain your attention before one of these other bumbling fools crossed your path. As a widow, you shall have many choices. I hope you will consider my offer. I am nothing but discreet.”