Chapter Eighteen
Jude was eager to visit Juliana. He wished to tell her of the revelations with the viscount and that she wouldn’t have anything to worry about regarding hers or Edward’s reputation, or facing the threatened scandal.
Well, unless someone was to learn of their involvement with each other, but with the viscount taken care of, they should be in the clear.
He longed for her to choose him, and not find themselves in a situation where a marriage would be necessary to minimize on dit and scandal. What was he thinking? Did he wish to be married? Would he ask her to be his wife?
“My lord, this arrived for you,” Abbott said.
Jude had been so lost in his thoughts that he hadn’t even heard Abbott enter his study. He took the missive from the man and watched him depart.
He broke the seal and read the letter to himself.
Jude,
I regret that I must ask you not to visit tonight. Hannah is staying over for the evening, so it would be quite awkward if she were to see you sneaking in.
Perhaps I shall see you tomorrow.
Yours,
Juliana
Jude sat back in his chair. Disappointment washed over him. Did she invite Hannah over because she wished to avoid him? Were the flowers not well received, and she didn’t wish to have anything beyond the physical nature of their relationship?
He would drive himself crazy with such thoughts. He had no choice but to wait until tomorrow to see her and determine where her head and heart were regarding a future between them.
At least a break from her, even if for a night, would give him more time to be certain of what he wanted for his future and what kind of future he believed he could give Juliana.
He could not allow himself to be hasty and make a rash declaration that would only bring pain and suffering upon them both if he couldn’t be a good husband to her.
He knew he could remain faithful, there wasn’t a question in his mind about that.
But could he continue to let her in, and to accept her love?
*
It took him a while to fall asleep consumed with thoughts about Juliana and their future, but once he did, Jude slept through the night with no nightmares. He didn’t sleep as well as he did the evening prior, but it was a relief to not wake up afraid from reliving the terror of his childhood.
He found that he missed Juliana. She was the only thought on his mind when he fought to find sleep, and the first thought after he woke. He had to see her that day for certain.
Carter helped him dress and he took his breakfast in the morning room by himself. He always knew his life was lonely, but it was even more so since he had a taste of what it might be like to have someone to share his life with.
If there were to be a future for him and Juliana, no more would he eat breakfast alone, left to read the paper and drink his coffee in silence. Not only would they have each other, but perhaps they would also have children.
Jude had never allowed himself to think of what it might be like to be a father before, but now that he had, he knew he would be the most devoted father. He would be everything to his children that his father wasn’t and shower them with as much love and affection as a father should.
After allowing such thoughts and ideas to take root, he couldn’t get them out of his head. He wanted the new life he imagined for himself, for Juliana, for them both. Even if he was terrified.
“My lord,” Abbott said, pulling him from his daydreams of Juliana enceinte and grinning ear to ear while he played on the floor with another child.
“Yes, Abbot.”
“Mr. Stone is here to see you.”
Hopefully, the man brought good news with him. He was ready to rid Juliana of the problem once and for all and be done with it.
“Bring him to my study. I will meet him there,” Jude directed.
He took another drink of his coffee before setting the cup back on the table, taking only his newspaper with him.
Once he reached his study, he motioned for Mr. Stone to take a seat before taking his own.
“Please tell me you have been successful, Stone.”
The man grinned. “Indeed, I have, your lord. You are the owner of all of his debt markers.”
The man held out a leather envelope, which Jude took and immediately opened. He looked over the contents, pleased that he had in his possession what he needed to protect Juliana. He would go to the ends of the earth to ensure that no harm came to her.
“Well done, Stone.”
“Should you need anything further from me, my lord, you know where to find me.”
Jude reached across the desk and shook the man’s hand.
“I shall ensure my solicitor sends payment and the bonus we discussed, and I would appreciate your continued discretion on this matter.”
“Of course, my lord. I shall take my leave now.”
As soon as Mr. Stone left his office, Jude reached for the bell pull, to which Abbott appeared a few moments later.
“Abbott, please send a footman to fetch my solicitor and have him attend to me directly. Then, retrieve Lord Wilton and bring him here. He is likely at his townhome, or if not there, then White’s.”
“Right away, my lord.”
Jude looked through the debt markers again, relieved to be another step closer to ending the threats.
While he waited, he read and responded to all of his correspondence, reviewed his latest report from his estate manager, and finished the paper before his solicitor, Mr. Henry Foulis, appeared in his study.
“Henry, thanks for attending me.”
“I only hope my next appointment won’t be too angry at me for being late,” Henry said.
He was a kind fellow, and Jude had been on a first-name basis with him for years. He was instrumental in helping him sort out his responsibilities after Jude’s father passed. His father never deigned to prepare his son for the title that he now held.
“I won’t keep you long. I have bought a large sum of debt markers, and I need you to make copies and ensure they are kept safe.”
Henry eyed him curiously. “Who are these markers for?”
“Viscount Gordon,” Jude replied. “The new one, that is.”
“I won’t pry into your business as to why you bought his markers, but I will do as you have asked and ensure they are kept safe, with an ironclad record of their existence.”
Jude knew Henry would understand what he needed to have done. “Thank you. I would like a set of copies to keep in my safe here as well, should I need to act quickly.”
Henry nodded. “Consider it done. Give me a week or so to do as you ask, and I will ensure they are delivered to you.”
“That is perfect. Thank you, Henry,” Jude said. “Also, if the Dowager Viscountess Gordon should ever need access to the copies, please grant it to her.”
Jude handed him the leather folder, and Henry opened it to glance inside before closing it back again. He eyed him suspiciously at his request, but didn’t ask any questions.
“Understood. Was there anything else?” Henry asked.
It was tempting to ask the man to work up the marriage contracts for him to marry Juliana, but he couldn’t do such a thing until they were both sure. Perhaps if he thought such things, he had his answer for what he hoped the future might hold.
“Nothing else for now, but I may be in touch again soon,” Jude said.
Henry narrowed his eyes, but then his jovial smile returned to his face. “Very well. I shall see myself out.”
Just as Henry was leaving Jude’s study, Matt came strolling in.
“Henry! Good to see you, old man.”
Henry laughed. “And always a pleasure to see you. I must be off, though.”
“Indeed,” Matt said, letting Henry pass.
Matt shifted his focus to Jude. “What was that about? Has something occurred?”
“Come and take a seat,” Jude said.
He did as Jude instructed and was rewarded with a snifter of brandy.
“I appreciate you coming right away, Matt. I didn’t have anyone else to discuss this matter with.”
“Of course. Is this related to Gordon?”
Jude nodded, then took a healthy sip of his drink.
“I learnt he had a sizable amount of debts he couldn’t afford to pay.
He thought his inheritance after Edward died would be much larger than it was, not realizing that most of the funds were left to Juliana.
The man started running up debts and gambling and ended up spending almost all of what he had.
When he realized the amount of his inheritance, he came after Juliana to obtain the funds from her. ”
“It doesn’t matter what the man says. He isn’t entitled to any of Juliana’s funds. Surely you know that.”
“Of course,” Jude said, “but I have ensured he will not dare to bother her again.”
Matt’s brow furrowed. “You bought up his markers, didn’t you?”
“I did.” Jude held his head high, knowing his friend might think him mad.
“Are you going to tell me what is going on here?” Matt asked suspiciously.
“I can’t.” This was one thing he could not share, not without Juliana’s permission. Jude drained the remaining contents of his glass.
Matt nodded in understanding. “I won’t ask you to betray something shared in confidence. How do you wish for me to help?”
“I don’t believe the incident is related, but I was attacked last night, and with the woman I saw in front of my home, I wanted you to know in the event that something were to go wrong, so you could ensure Juliana is protected.”
Matt leaned forward in his seat. “You were attacked? What are you talking about?”
Jude waved him off. “It was a group of thugs hoping to get a stash of coin. I wasn’t carrying anything.”
“Yet you called me here, so you have reason to be concerned.”
“I am just being overly cautious. I can’t allow any harm to come to Juliana.” He would give his own life before that happened. The realization made it increasingly more difficult for him to keep himself from acknowledging how deeply in love with her he was.
Matt stared at him. “Are you going to tell me what is going on between you and Juliana?”
“I don’t know what you mean,” Jude lied. He was certain he knew exactly what Matt suspected. He couldn’t confess his love, until he mustered the courage to speak the words to Juliana.
“I think you do. You are different, my friend.”
Jude laughed. “Is that a bad thing?”
“Not at all. It’s quite good, now that I think about it. You seem relaxed, at ease even. Like you have torn down the walls you had built around yourself. I just hope you are in earnest when it comes to the lady.”
Jude’s expression changed to a frown. “What is that supposed to mean?”
“She is not a lady to dally with. She is a friend to all of us, and none of us will take kindly to her being hurt in any way.”
“And you believe I would do so?” Jude asked, biting back his anger.
It was a fair concern based on what Jude’s friends believed they knew about him, for which he only had himself to blame. It didn’t mean it irked him any less.
“I believe you are known as the most notorious rake of the ton, and while I don’t believe everything they write about you, I am well aware you have mistresses.”
“Had, my good man,” Jude said. “I had mistresses. And if you read everything in those gossip sheets, you are also aware it’s widely known I have never dallied with a woman in the ton.”
Matt’s brow furrowed. “Until now, it seems.”
“I am not dallying with anyone, I assure you,” Jude said.
Jude was quickly losing patience with Matt’s questioning. Even if it was warranted, it was still blasted annoying.
“I’m glad to hear it,” Matt said, softening his tone. “For what it’s worth. I hope you find happiness and settle down.”
Based on the constant thoughts and nagging from within, Jude began to admit to himself that he shared those same hopes. At least with one woman.
He refilled each of their glasses and pushed Matt’s back towards him.
“That remains to be seen,” Jude said, before taking a long drink from his glass.
Another half hour passed. Jude shifted Matt’s focus to the matter at hand and told him of all the different debts the viscount had run up all over town.
“I supposed you wish to go and inform Juliana about what you have learnt,” Matt said.
“Indeed.” Jude would love nothing more than to do so.
Matt rose. “Well, I must take my leave. Do let me know if you need my assistance.”
Once Matt left, Jude glanced at the clock on the mantle. He was eager to tell Juliana that the new Lord Gordon would never bother her again, but it was still several hours until he might sneak into her home.
He paced his study and then started towards the door.
Society could hang. He had to see her right away and let her know that they possessed what they needed to rid her of the vexing viscount.
Why couldn’t her friend call on her for tea?
No one else needed to know that if he had his way, their tea would be served in her chamber.