Chapter 1
CHAPTER ONE
The thought of having a future beyond the cold stone walls of my castle in Blackwood was always just that.
A thought. A dream. Something I spent my entire life imagining, especially when I lost myself in the pages of a book.
My life would never look like those of the heroines I admired.
My future would never be mine. Love would never be within my reach.
The duty to my kingdom that had been settled on my shoulders from the moment I took my first breath would always take priority.
I’d lived for years with the longing and desire for a life and future I wanted, but knew I could never have. My acceptance of that reality changed the moment my boots sank into the soft soil of Dawnlin.
In a way, it felt like a dream itself. The warmth, the smells, the sounds, the suns. I was transported to a world opposite in every way from the one I’d been trapped in, all because I had hope.
Hope for a future that I could choose, one different from what fate promised, led me to this place. It opened my eyes to a new life that could be molded by my own actions, a future of my own creation, not only here but also when I returned.
Now, that hope is gone.
Dane stole it.
He robbed not only me, but every single person on this island of the hope that brought them here, hope that they could alter the trajectory of their life and save someone they couldn’t live without.
The evidence of his betrayal is right before me, hanging from the white-knuckled grip of someone else who, not long ago, also hurt me, just in a vastly different way.
Shallow breaths stutter in my chest and pain lances through my fingers as I fist Weston’s clothes. I’m trying with everything I have to stay upright, despite the ache in the depths of my chest telling me to fall to my knees and break under the weight of the new reality that we are trapped here.
Forever.
Without the passage of time on the island, all of us here will live forever in an endless monotony. We’ll have no purpose, no future, no hope that we can return, with only each other to rely on and build a semblance of normalcy.
The sound of metal slicing into the soft soil at my feet cuts through the dull roar in my ears and snaps me out of my spiraling thoughts, though I’m unable to look away from the empty pouch Mara still clutches.
The very same lump of fabric that only days ago still held a golden glow, filled with the dust I had almost taken.
If I had, I wouldn’t be staring at her now, trying to make sense of how this could have happened. If I had, it never would have happened.
“Lennox.”
Warmth settles on my cheek, and the brush of the rough calluses from years of Weston’s training jars me from my trance. I wish it were just that. A trance, a hallucination, a nightmare. Anything that would mean all our fears aren’t currently coming to pass.
I pull my eyes from the pouch, and tilt my chin until our gazes meet, the deep pools of teal reading everything I’m feeling.
I can’t hide anything from him; he already knows.
Tears well, and his face blurs as I feel my strength crumbling.
As much as I don’t want them, I can’t stop them.
Tears that represent every single inadequacy that’s weighed down on my shoulders for years pool in my vision, marring the one thing that has felt solid and sure since I’ve been here.
Useless.
Dane was right. I feel useless. I couldn’t even accomplish one thing and take the dust that would have given at least a few Castaways a chance at going home.
If I’d been strong enough to fight Dane, smart enough not to let him catch on, I could have changed some of our fates.
If I had, at least being trapped would have been bittersweet.
“Lennox, sweetheart,” Weston mumbles, and I blink rapidly, clearing the tears and begging them not to fall. “Be strong for just a little longer.”
Barely holding back a choked sob, I nod slowly, our eyes staying locked on each other as he assesses me. It’s as if nothing else exists when Weston looks at me, the face of pure understanding, as he waits to make sure I am alright, that I will not break.
Not yet.
A flash of movement catches my eye as Mara takes a step closer, and Weston reacts. His arm lifts quickly, his sword leveling at her without taking his focus off me.
“Don’t take another fucking step,” he growls. “She may trust you, but I don’t.”
My chest swells as a vision of what he would be like as the First Guard back home flashes before my eyes.
The way he would protect me, the way no guards would ever think of challenging him or speaking to me in a condescending manner, the way no suitors would ever want to come near me.
But now, that is a future that will never come to pass.
“She’s fine,” I whisper, but it’s only when I take a deep breath and unclench my hands from him that he turns away, focusing his full attention back on the Voyagers that brought us this fate-altering news.
“I’m not trying to trick you,” Mara calls. “Or attack you, or whatever betrayals are running through your head.”
“After the way she came back to me the last time she met up with you, I’m not taking any chances,” Weston calls back, his brows drawn low and jaw tight with the same look of fury he had the night I stepped foot onto the ship, exhausted and bleeding.
The night everything changed between us.
“I’m sorry. I was wrong, and I can’t take it back. Can we just forget it happened?” Mara asks.
“No.”
Weston’s harsh response echoes in the air around us, making his feelings about the situation clear. He does not forgive Mara for throwing knives at my back, whether her actions resulted from Dane’s manipulations or not.
He yanks his sword from the ground, both his blades relaxed in front of him despite his shoulders sending off waves of tension as he squares his body to them.
“We’ll need to figure out where we go from here, and what our next steps are. It won’t be accomplished tonight,” he says. “Meet us tomorrow at the plateau. Only bring one other person, and don’t even think about trying to pull anything. You won’t be prepared for it.”
“Who the fuck put you in charge?” Mara snaps, crossing her arms over her chest. With both Dane and Storm gone, Mara is the most likely person to step into the role of leading the Voyagers, especially since I’m no longer one of them.
But she’s never met Weston before, never seen him protect his people, so she has no idea of the respect he has from every member of his crew.
“Dane did. The second he stole the magic from the Guardian and tried to kill me for it.” Mara’s eyes go wide, and her mouth falls open slightly, and I feel my jaw slacken as well.
Weston hid that information from me for a while, but now that Dane’s gone, maybe he feels we have nothing to lose from her knowing.
He continues. “Dane may have filled your minds with lies, but that doesn’t change that I am the one in charge here. You’ll agree, or we don’t have to include you. It’s your choice.”
Her head snaps to me. “Lennox—”
“Do what he says, Mara.” The edge in my voice makes her jaw slam shut as her head swivels between the two of us.
I’m grateful for her apology. I’m glad she realized what she did was wrong and how she treated me was unwarranted.
But she doesn’t know everything, and if she thinks she can step in and try to tell Weston and the rest of the crew who have been in hiding for years how and when they are going to have access to the island, she is mistaken.
Weston will never let anyone else dictate what’s best for the crew, especially since she hasn’t proven that she isn’t still willing to harm us. Apology or not.
“What if more of us want to come after they find out?” she asks.
“Be a leader, and tell them no.”
Her eyes narrow at Weston, and irritation itches in my fingertips. I didn’t expect her to like him, or even be cordial, but her resistance to him trying to negotiate a meeting that is safe for everyone is frustrating.
“So what, we’re just supposed to risk our own safety if you show up with more Castaways? How am I supposed to ensure that there will only be two of you, too?” she snaps.
“It doesn’t matter how many of us there are. No one will harm you, unless you make the first move,” Weston says. “There will be two of you. Once we come to an agreement, if others want to meet and talk, we will deal with that then.”
Mara shuffles uncomfortably on her feet and lets out a low huff. “Fine,” she grinds out.
Despite the initial resistance, I’m relieved she isn’t fighting Weston’s requirement harder.
I don’t think she ever truly wanted to be in charge of the Voyagers, despite being so vocal about how everyone should view me as a traitor.
For someone who isn’t used to having authority to step in when there is no one else, it can be an adjustment.
That day would have been in my future, but now I’ll never know.
Before I left to return to the Voyagers, Weston and I discussed the possibility of a truce if the dust ran out without discovering how to replenish it.
We expected that conversation to be with the Guardian, not with Mara, who must adjust to this new role she has taken on, as well as someone who doesn’t know everything Dane kept hidden, or the location of the waters.
Weston’s head swivels toward Roley, and the boy’s shoulders raise in a slight cower. Abandoning whatever he was going to say, Weston’s chin drops to his shoulder, his gaze finding mine as his voice lowers to a barely audible mumble.
“He’s scared of me. He can choose to come with us tonight, or wait until after we meet, but the option should come from you.”
I nod and clear my throat, trying hard not to betray the emotion that is still trapped in a knot there.