Chapter 11 #2
“After I found the waters, I didn’t have a choice but to go with him back to the ship, but I chose to stay there.
I learned the truth about Dane’s motives and everything he had done, and made my own decision.
You all have been looking for so many years, and now that things are the way they are, we agreed to tell you the location. ”
Pure shock is apparent in all the expressions before me.
Gauge jumps to his feet, his hands on top of his head as he paces back and forth.
Roley looks around at everyone, then back at me, like he is still having trouble understanding.
Lilly reaches up and swipes at her cheeks.
I can’t even fully comprehend what they are feeling, because this situation is so different from when we all found the mountain.
“It is going to be a hard decision. We can’t leave Dawnlin now.
Whether or not you get the waters is up to you and the island.
I completely understand if you choose not to try.
Being granted them and not being able to return is something I don’t know if I could bear.
But I also understand not wanting to live for eternity wondering and questioning.
If I were on your side, I would want the choice. ”
“What do you mean ‘being granted?’” Lilly calls from the back. “Don’t you all have them?”
I start to answer, wondering how I am going to explain the insides of the mountain to them, but Weston beats me to it.
“When you enter the chamber where the waters are held, the island decides if you are worthy of them,” he says. He shifts on his feet and rests his hands on his hips. “None of us have received them. We don’t know if it will be the same with any of you.”
The silence in the room is palpable, as the weight of the news sinks into all of them.
Going into the mountain with the expectation that you may leave empty-handed might actually be better than my experience.
Recovering from having the hope ripped away, and walking out feeling unworthy only to be captured by the enemy wasn’t easy to move past. It took time, and now we have that.
“Like I said, it’s your choice. You should really think about it,” I say.
“We can bring you all tomorrow,” Weston says as the silent stares turn toward him. Gauge still paces in the back of the room, and Sawyer’s head is now in his hands as he stares blankly at us. “You can sleep on it. Anyone who wants to try can meet us on the beach in the morning.”
“Thank you for telling us,” Mara says, her voice hoarse with unshed tears.
“You’re welcome.” I give her a soft smile, and she returns it, though slightly wavering as she holds back emotion.
Despite everything that transpired between us, I truly don’t think Mara hated me, even when she acted like she did.
She was hurt that she had lost another friend to the Castaways and was dealing with facing the reality that she would most likely be alone if she returned.
And it’s hard to blame someone for their actions when they were blinded by manipulation.
“So you’re really not mean?” Roley asks, staring wide-eyed at Weston.
He shakes his head with a chuckle. “No, Roley, I’m not mean.”
“That’s debatable,” I mutter, and his low huff brings a smile to my face.
“Can I go see the ship?” Roley says and jumps to his feet.
“Sure,” Weston agrees. “I bet Fin will be excited to show you everything.”
Murmurs erupt in the room as everyone can’t contain themselves any longer, and I take it as our cue to leave and let them do what they need to come to a decision.
“Does anyone have questions?” I ask, but everyone still looks too stunned to voice anything right now.
“If any come up, you know where to find us. Otherwise, we will see whoever wants to try in the morning.” Weston’s hand settles on my low back as he leads me toward the door.
I give the Voyagers a final wave before stepping back out into the open air and loosing a deep breath.
Weston closes the door behind us before his arms cross over his chest.
“That went better than I expected,” he says.
“I agree,” I sigh. “I feel relieved.”
“You did great, Lennox.”
“I don’t know how you talk to the crew like that all the time. I feel like I could take a nap now.”
He chuckles and then steps toward me, his hand finding my back again. “Lots of practice. You would have gotten the hang of it.”
Because I would have had to do it my entire life once I was queen.
Not anymore.
We start off down the walkway toward the platform, but I remember something I wanted to do, that I didn’t have the chance to before. The last time I left camp, I couldn’t do anything that might tip Dane off that I didn’t plan to return, but now, I don’t have to hide anything.
“Follow me. I want to grab something.” I weave my fingers between his and lead him through camp until I get to our set of bunks.
“I’ll be right back.” I release his hand and grab the rungs of the ladder, climbing quickly to my platform. I hope it’s all still there, and that Dane didn’t destroy it after he discovered I was a traitor.
When I reach the top, I pull myself onto the platform, only to be startled that Weston didn’t stay behind.
“This is where you slept?” His arms rest on the edge, his body still propped on the ladder as he looks over the space.
“This is it.”
He nudges my boot, and I move to the side, giving him enough space to climb up.
He sits beside me, his back leaning against the railing that ensured I didn’t roll to my death, and crosses his ankles in front of him.
I feel oddly self-conscious as he looks around, glancing at my lack of personal effects, before he takes in the trees and the skies above.
“It’s nice up here.”
“I thought so too,” I say and press my shoulder into his.
“Why did you pick this one?”
My cheeks heat and I look down at my fingers, picking at a nail.
It seems like so long ago that I was choosing my bunk the first night I arrived on the island with an abundance of hope and optimism.
The reason may seem insignificant, but to me, it was everything.
Dane never asked, even though he knew I went all the way to the top, but Weston cares enough to know about this tiny piece of me, a remnant of who I was when I stepped foot on the island.
“I hadn’t ever seen the stars,” I breathe. “I wanted to stay under the sky for as long as possible.”
“I remember that feeling.” He tilts his head back, resting it on the wooden beam behind us as he looks up at the blanket of thick clouds that is oddly reminiscent of home.
“When Sig and I finally left the cave, I remember being amazed by how clear everything was. I appreciated it much more after almost dying, and it made me realize how much I took it for granted every time Rem and I traveled anywhere outside the kingdom. After surviving, I try not to do that. I try to appreciate the little pieces of beauty and be grateful for things that happen. I don’t want to overlook even the little things.
You never know how quickly your entire life can change. Recent days have proven that.”
I nod solemnly then lift my chin, but he’s no longer staring at the sky, taking in the beauty of nature.
He’s looking at me. His eyes caress every inch of my face before moving up to hold my gaze.
My chest tightens and my throat thickens.
I thought I’d only learned to have hope and trust here on the island, but Weston is right.
Everything can change in a moment. What you thought you had could be ripped away, and if we don’t take the time to live in the moment, to love what is in front of us, we forget that it can be fleeting, and could be gone in the next.
My lips curve into a soft smile, and I shift to my knees, clambering over his lap so I’m straddling him. His hands settle on my hips, and he watches me watching him; soaking up the moment that we have, because another isn’t ever guaranteed.
“This bunk may have started out that way, but I don’t have very good memories of it.” I lean down and press a firm kiss to his mouth, pulling back only slightly before speaking against his lips. “I like your bed much better.”
“You’re fucking right about that,” he grumbles and snakes his arms around my waist, squeezing me against his chest. “What did we come up here for anyway?”
“Well, I told you to stay down there, but you didn’t listen.
” I wiggle out of his grasp, and he adjusts himself beneath me.
I can’t keep the smirk off my face. “I just came here for my stuff.” I shift to the edge of my sleeping pad, looking for my last piece of home.
The fabric peeks out from under the bed, where it must have gotten shoved the last time I was here.
I reach under and pull out the balled-up clothing, the thick cloak wrapped around everything else, and tuck it under my arm.
“Alright. Let’s go.” I scoot toward the ladder, but Weston puts his hand out, stopping me.
“Nice try.” He slides in front of me, descending the ladder first before I follow.
His hands find my waist as I reach the bottom, and he lifts me off the ladder, setting me back firmly on the floor beside him.
The lump of fabric disappears from under my arm, and I turn to find him grasping it all in one hand, and reaching out to weave his fingers through mine with the other.
“Lead the way. I’m not sure how to get out of this place.”
I laugh and squeeze his head. “You would have been so lost if you had ever snuck in here.”
“Jorn would have shown me.”
Camp is still quiet as we follow the walkways, and I can only imagine what discussions started in the cabin after we left.
When the platform hits the ground, we step off, and I take one more look around camp.
I doubt this is the last time I will be here, but it feels so different walking out of it with no intention of ever returning, this time with Weston by my side.
Once we’re back on deck, I take my clothes from his hand and head straight toward the stairs. The door clicks closed behind me, and I know he followed, probably curious about my hint of urgency.
Bending down, I lift the lid to his trunk and drop my balled-up clothes inside, slamming the lid shut right after. My chest heaves with a huge sigh as a weight lifts off my shoulders, and I turn to find him softly smiling at me.
“What was that for?”
“It’s time to leave Blackwood and Dane behind.” I cross the room and take his hands in mine. “It’s time to let go of the worry about everything we can’t control or the wonder about how things could have turned out. It’s time to live, just like you said. Can you leave all that behind too?”
His smile is dazzling, and my chest squeezes.
“Anything you say, Lennox.”