Chapter Nineteen
"PROMISE ME YOU'LL BEHAVE," Lysander whispered into Estrella's ear as he soaped her back.
She was seated in her usual place between his long, muscular legs, her body pleasantly sore after a long and exquisitely intense night of lovemaking.
And when she had woken up earlier, it was to the wonderful feel of her husband's mouth once again tongue-fucking her.
The memories made her toes curl, and she sighed in bliss as Lysander licked her ear.
Perfect, she couldn't help thinking.
You still haven't answered me, my Star.
Water spilled over the edges of the tub as she turned around and pressed her hands against his high-boned cheeks. "Yes, yes, yes." Her voice was giddy and teasing. "I promise I'll behave." Whatever that means.
A warning growl erupted in her mind, and she smiled weakly. Oops. She had forgotten about him reading her mind again. But whereas such instances had amused him before, this time he remained frowning, and her smile faded.
"I didn't mean to make fun of things," she said uncertainly.
"If you want to be treated like a grown-up," he said flatly, "then you need to act like it.
" He saw her flinch at his words and bit back a curse, realizing how unnecessarily harsh his tone had become.
"I'm sorry." He took hold of her hand and pressed it to his lips.
"I just have a lot of things in my mind.
" He saw her face soften, and he tried not to feel guilty about it, knowing that she misunderstood his words.
She thought he was worried about tonight's planned offensive against the vampires, but that wasn't it at all.
What Lysander was finding extremely difficult to adjust to was the growing strength of his feelings for her. He had thought, now that he knew of her imperfections, he would be able to control his love for her. But he had thought wrong.
Accepting his love for her was just like opening a fucking dam inside of him, and now both man and beast craved for her beyond reason.
So much so that when she had asked him if she could join him in his last strategy meeting before going to battle, he hadn't been able to say no.
Even when he knew it would mean appearing weak before Fina, and he might as well have admitted his wife had him by the balls—-
He had to give their love a shot. She was young, and it was his fault that she had to surmount challenges that even the most experienced rulers would have found a challenge. But he was here now, and he would make sure she didn't make the same mistakes.
Preparations for the battle were already underway when they came out of the house to join Lysander's men.
The clanging sound of swords clashed mixed with the rough grunts of soldiers doing hand-to-hand combat drills.
Overall morale appeared high enough, but Lysander had a feeling this would change if they learned the princess had been completely shut out from planning tonight's offensive.
The twins, along with several of the Faes' most experienced soldiers, swiftly came forward to engage the prince in discussion, and Estrella just as quickly hung back. This had the other men glancing at her oddly, but she pretended not to notice it.
Even Lysander's gaze drifted to her once in a while.
He was probably worried she'd go back on her word, she thought worriedly, and act horribly presumptuous in front of people who were a thousand times more experienced than her.
She wished she could tell him that the only reason she had been so confident all these years was because of him.
Keep my kingdom safe for me. I trust you.
Those were his very words, and it had inspired her, gave her strength and power when she so badly wanted to cry and give up and run to her big brother for help—-
Estrella was startled when Lysander suddenly appeared by her side. "Husband?"
"I..." A grimace worked its way to the prince's handsome face when Lysander realized he couldn't think of anything to say.
He had been listening to her thoughts, and the entire time, he had been unable to stop wondering if she was still faking it, and she was merely thinking of things to make him feel guilty.
How was it possible that he was able to love her without trusting her? And how was it, despite all the lies and doubts, everything in him still rebelled against the mere knowledge of how much she had hurt in the past?
Estrella's brows furrowed. "Lysander?" Are you worried about tonight?
Lysander forced a smile. No. Of course not.
The words, while not a lie, wasn't exactly the truth either.
There were more than a few red flags in Fina's plans, but even if the worst was to happen, his calculations told him that the risks would still be manageable.
He owed this to Fina, after what she had suffered—-
As they reached the foot of the stairs, a blur of movement coming from the manor's front doors caught his eye, and the beast inside him growled in warning.
Lysander was immediately on guard, and he reacted swiftly and instinctively, reaching for Estrella to put her behind him as he turned to face the threat.
Which turned out to be none other than Fina.
Color stained Lysander's high-boned cheeks when he realized that the beast inside him seemed to have deliberately messed up with his senses, making him erroneously react to his own spymaster as some snake that slithered in treacherous silence.
It was a despicable and inexcusable mistake, and he immediately loosened his hold on Estrella to make amends.
"My apologies, Fina—-"
"Your Highness." The spymaster's tone was tight, and Lysander stiffened as he belatedly noticed the look of vexation on the older woman's face.
"I've just received word from our scouts, and they say Lyccan spies have been spotted in the area.
" Fina showed the photos in her phone, saying, "We've reason to believe that the wolves intend to interfere, perhaps even sabotage—-"
"What?" Estrella was incredulous. What did Fina think she was insinuating? "Domenico wouldn't do that!"
But the spymaster didn't even glance her way and continued to act as if Estrella hadn't spoken a word.
"They couldn't have known about this unless they have a spy among us.
" She saw Aluin throw a look of contempt in her direction at her words, but she ignored this.
These days, neither she nor the twins bothered to conceal their mutual animosity, and that was just fine with her.
"Take care with your words, spy," Aluin snarled. "They're bordering dangerously close to treason—-"
"It's not treason when it's the truth," she snapped. "Ask the princess yourself if you wish." She thrust her phone at the twins. "Ask them if they recognize her."
Alain shook his head when he saw the princess reach for the phone. "You do not need to—-" He stopped speaking when he saw the way the princess suddenly paled, and a sudden silence swept over them, so heavy one could've heard a pin drop.
Estrella couldn't believe what she was seeing.
She almost asked if it was possible for the photos to be edited, but she knew someone else would've long brought it up if that had been the case.
"I don't understand," she whispered shakily.
"These men are from my pack, but—-" She saw Lysander's face harden, and her heart dropped to her stomach.
"Lysander, I truly have no idea—-" She instinctively reached out to him, but he jerked away, and her heart lurched in pain.
Everything was happening too fast, and she didn't know even where or how to start untangling the pile of misunderstandings that now threatened to drive them apart. "Lysander, please—-"
"I told you never to lie to me again." Lysander could feel himself growing cold with every word he spoke.
"And you promised." She fucking promised, and she had broken it.
It was almost like a repeat of all the mistakes they had made during the Great War, with people making and breaking promises to his race like their lives didn't mean a fucking thing.
Estrella wanted to cry at the look of betrayal in Lysander's gaze. "I swear I didn't. Please believe me—-"
"I did believe you," Lysander said tonelessly, "but you clearly fucking didn't." His whole world had come crashing down, and the only way to keep himself sane was to distance himself from everything.
"My own wife—-"
And this time, Estrella could no longer stop the tears. Wife. The word that used to make her squeal and feel like her heart was about to burst with joy. Wife. But this time, the word only tore her into pieces.
Because the way he was looking at her...
"My own wife didn't believe in me enough so she went behind my back to ask for fucking help."
Because the way he was talking to her...
"And of all the people you could've asked to help, it goddamn had to be Domenico Moretti—-"
It was as if he no longer thought of her as one.
She dropped to her knees and bowed her head in a formal gesture of appeal. "I swear it, Lysander, I swear I didn't tell Domenico a single thing—-"
"The princess speaks the truth."
All eyes snapped to Alain, and even Fina was privately stunned.
The truth was, when she had overheard the two Lyccan soldiers talking at the ball, they had specifically mentioned about the princess not having any clue about their secret mission.
While Fina naturally kept that little fact to herself, she had wondered but never suspected the oh-so-righteous Alain to be the one in talks with Domenico Moretti.
"I was the one who spoke to the Moretti heir," Alain acknowledged flatly.
Aluin jerked in shock. "Brother?" What the fuck was his twin saying? Was he doing this merely to protect the princess? Or had he truly gone ahead and defied their prince's wishes?
"The princess has no part—-"
"I commend you for trying to protect the princess with your well-meaning lies," Lysander interrupted coldly, "but it's not going to work."
Alain bit back a curse when he realized how convinced the prince was of his wife's act of betrayal. "Your Highness, I—-"
"Enough, goddammit." Lysander was done fucking listening to lies. "Aluin, help the princess up and escort her to our room. From hereon, nothing about tonight's offensive shall be relayed to her, and anyone who dares disobey will be immediately dismissed from service."
Estrella stared up at her husband, stricken. "Lysander—-"
But the prince didn't even turn her way and instead addressed the spymaster. "The twins will not be joining us tonight—-"
Alain sucked his breath.
"Adjustments will have to be made for their absences."
"I understand, Your Highness. I'll let the lieutenants know." Fina's tone was deliberately subdued. Now that she was done sowing the seeds of discord, it was time to step back and let everyone reap its cursed rewards.
Estrella couldn't believe Lysander was going to end their discussion just like that. Your Highness, please—-
Lysander flinched at the heartbreaking sound of Estrella's voice inside his mind, and his gaze snapped to where his wife was.
The twins were gently but firmly pulling her up, not letting her stay on her knees, but before he could look away, her stricken gaze suddenly clashed with his, and Lysander sucked his breath at the desperate amount of pain in her eyes.
Please listen to me, Lysander. I swear I didn't tell my brother anything. Please—-
He turned his back on her. Get the fuck out of my mind.
And then he forced himself to walk away.
Tonight's offensive wasn't just about retribution, and she had goddamn known that.
Tonight was supposed to be their ultimate show of strength, and her lies had just fucking jeopardized that.
If the Lyccans were to interfere or sabotage this for whatever reason, the Faes would be seen as the weakest link in L'Alliance and Lysander couldn't afford to even risk having that happen.
Weak rulers had failed the Faes far too many times, and their mistakes had cost the lives of thousands. He couldn't let that happen. Just fucking couldn't. Not even if it meant destroying any chances for a future with the woman he loved.