CHAPTER FIFTY-EIGHT #4
She blinked. “I think you need to give someone else the Fire Relic.”
“And I think you need to stop deflecting,” he returned. “What did you mean?”
Ilain opened her mouth, but no words came out. She fidgeted uncomfortably, her fluttery sleeves rippling around her with each movement. “I would rather not discuss this in front of . . .” Her hand gestured wildly at the ministers.
“You’re the one who brought it up in front of . . .” He waved his hand in a mocking of her gesture.
Ilain curled her upper lip at him. “And you ignored it until Thom pestered you.”
“I’m a little slow sometimes,” Ethenn said truthfully. He tipped his chin toward her. “Tell me what you meant. What price aren’t you willing to pay?”
Ilain took a step back as though she were afraid of him. Her beaded dress glittered, its pale blue like the faded sky on a clear winter day. “I . . .” Ilain’s voice was almost soundless as she fought for words. “It’s you.”
Ethenn’s brow drew together, the Fire Relic stirring the emotions inside of him. It was him. He was the price she wouldn’t pay. But . . . “What does that mean?”
A gentle smile came to Ilain’s lips. “I think you know.”
“Pretend I don’t.”
She chuckled lightly. “I can’t become the Highlady Chancellor,” she said. “Not if it means marrying someone else.”
Ethenn blinked as her words sank in. “Hm.”
Her brow quirked. “Hm?”
“Mm-hm.” Ethenn drew in a long breath. “So you won’t marry someone else because you meant it. I didn’t believe you, but you—you did; you meant it that night?”
A faint blush swept across her pale skin. “I did.”
“You love me?”
“I do.”
“That’s . . .” He heaved a sigh. “That’s bloody fantastic.” Immediately, Ethenn turned to the ministers. “Is our betrothal still valid?”
An air of collective confusion swept over the room. The ministers cast fleeting glances at each other while their friends tried to stifle their laughter. Archminister Essen and Archminister Dudleye shared a knowing look.
“As we were only now informed that you wished to end it, the contract still remains, which means that, yes, you are legally betrothed,” Dudleye said.
“Ilain is my wife?” Ethenn asked, pointing toward her.
“Yes.”
“Great.” Ethenn shuffled on his feet, fighting the urge to let out a whoop of joy.
“In that case, Ilain and I would like to be married and Bonded without delay, as previously discussed. You lot figure out the paperwork and details to perform both of those ceremonies tonight, and you can send us wherever the hell you like after that. In the meantime, my wife and I have some things to, uh . . . take care of.”
Without bothering to wait for their reply, Ethenn strode across the room, grabbed Ilain’s hand, and pulled her out the door before anyone else could get out a word. He marched her through the halls, trying to remember which path would get them back to his room the fastest.
“You really need to give that Relic to someone else,” Ilain said, breaking through his concentration. “You’re starting to become dangerously impetuous.”
“Admittedly, four days with it has weakened my threshold for caution,” he quipped. “But as we’re going to Bond in somewhere around twelve hours, I’m not sure it matters much.”
Ilain tugged on his arm, forcing him to a stop beside her. “Ethenn,” she wore a look of awe, “are you sure?”
“You love me?” he asked.
Her expression softened tenderly. “Yes.”
“For how long?”
“Truly?” She shrugged, causing her sleeves to flutter like flowers in the breeze. Her fingers brushed his forearms. “When you told me about these.”
Realizing she meant his scars, he furrowed his brow. “Why—?”
“I loved you before then, I’m sure, but it was at that moment I realized that I would give up anything—” She gripped his hands, pulling them to her chest. “Anything to see you happy.”
And she had, Ethenn understood. She’d willingly rejected the Alliance and the future she’d prepared for the last thirty years . . . for him.
Ethenn kissed her then. Deep and full. The Fire Relic burned against his chest with excitement, but his magic sent a cooling spiral through his veins. Ilain returned the kiss, still clutching his hands as though desperately afraid to let him go.
Drawing back, Ethenn tugged her closer. “I’m sorry,” he said immediately. “I was a fool. The things I said—”
“You didn’t know.” Ilain’s gaze was soft.
“And you were right. The whole time I’ve known you, I’ve been trying to protect myself by manipulating you and lying to you.
That’s why I pushed you to seal our betrothal before we were ready.
” Her voice dipped lower. “I was the fool, Ethenn. From the moment we met, I knew you were different. And I feared that my heart would attach itself to you, so I pushed you away. Then you turned out to be a Warrior, and I knew you wouldn’t believe me .
. . So I tried to convince you of my affection without ever being vulnerable enough to tell you the truth. ”
Seeing the glimmer of tears in her eyes, Ethenn’s chest tightened. They stood along a walkway under the light of a large window, in full view of the palace. He supposed he ought not to be concerned since he’d just kissed her, but he thought this conversation should be held somewhere less public.
Swiftly, Ethenn drew Ilain through the hallways, down the final few curves toward his bedroom. There, he shut them in, drawing her toward the small settee that sat against the wall. He guided her to sit, though the flickering urges of the Fire Relic kept him standing.
“Ilain,” he began, flexing his hands at his sides, “whatever the path before us, I want you to know now: I’m not a good man. I’ve made numerous mistakes, I’m prone to violence, and I refuse to trust people because I’ve been hurt too many times. But I don’t want to be that man anymore.”
And so, Ethenn told Ilain about his past. He told her about his parents, Fredrik and Leannah, and his sister, Terrina.
He didn’t leave out any details of their family life or their upbringing.
He didn’t hesitate to tell her about Vernon and his abuse, the years spent in the fighting pits, or the accidental murder of his fellow fighter.
He explained Terrina’s marriage, his presumed killing of her husband, and his subsequent volunteering to become a soldier to escape the wrath of the law.
He trusted her with everything because he didn’t want to be a weapon any longer, and he thought perhaps Deckard was right: Ilain could make him better.
The true Ilain Calder, the gentle, reserved, and tender woman she was within, was perfectly suited to quell the fire within him purely with her love.
And with everything in him, he hoped that his loyalty, determination, and ferocity might make her feel safe and cared for enough to become that woman in full.