CHAPTER SIXTY-FIVE #2
He responded to her humor with a serious stare. “If you’re interested,” he remarked. “Or we could set sail across the sea to Schon and embark on a brand-new adventure—something entirely unknown. We could earn a living using our skills and never experience a dull moment again.”
As Evylin furrowed her brow, she came to the conclusion that the idea wasn’t as thrilling as it initially appeared.
After all the traveling and exciting adventures that they had experienced over the last six months, she found the notion of a boring routine quite appealing.
Not forever, perhaps just a month or so.
But ideally, she wanted a few weeks to enjoy the peacefulness of monotony.
Deckard guided her hand onto his thigh and placed his other hand over it.
“If you’re concerned about being distant from everyone,” he said, searching her eyes with genuine concern, “don’t worry.
I’m sure Thom would come along, and I believe we could persuade Brea to join us too.
Vayden might even be open to the idea of a fresh start there.
However, I doubt Ilain would want to leave, so we’ll have to exclude her and Ethenn from our plans. ”
Evylin considered him, her lips parting slightly. “You’ve thought this through, haven’t you?”
He shrugged. “I’ve considered many ideas.”
“But this one more than the others?”
“More than some but not more than all.”
Unsure whether she truly wanted to know the answer, Evylin fiddled with the blended moonstone in his ring. “And which idea have you considered the most?”
Deckard averted his gaze, tilting his head away from her. “It’s inconsequential.”
“Please tell me.” She traced her fingers along the back of his hand and down to his wrist.
Without lifting his gaze, he responded with an almost regretful tone. “We could return to how things used to be. I could be an officer again, and we could settle in Loclight. We could forget that we were ever anything more.”
Expressing those thoughts appeared to spark Deckard’s bravery, and his gaze returned to her face.
“We could relinquish our magic and lead ordinary lives. We could start a family, and you could manage the home and our daily matters. Or you could join me in the army. I could seek assignments that keep me in the city—ones that wouldn’t separate me from you and our children for more than a week or two at a time if it’s absolutely necessary.
“All of this,” he freed one hand to gesture around the room, “would fade into mere memory. It was an adventure we shared, something unique to us that we could never forget. But we would finally be free of every obligation and the pressure to be anything other than ourselves—only bound to each other and our children.”
Evylin heard the longing in every word he uttered. Yet, she also sensed the underlying fear.
Deckard’s vision for their family—imagining them happily living in the city while he returned to being an officer—wasn’t just a simple fantasy.
Though she had asked him about his dreams before, he had never offered the truth of his hopes.
Now, she could feel the unease that his real wishes brought to the surface.
He might find it hard to acknowledge, but deep down, she understood that this wasn’t his genuine desire.
It was more of a compromise. This was the dream he convinced himself was enough to protect him from disappointment if he ever fell short of the aspirations that he truly cherished.
Hewitt’s voice echoed in her mind. Every word he had ever spoken to her about Deckard, every piece of advice he had given her regarding her husband, came flooding back.
From the moment Deckard delivered his speech in Whickam Village, Hewitt declared that he understood what the captain desired. He believed Deckard’s goal in joining the Ephrian Army was to emulate the legend he admired so much, aspiring to become a legend himself.
Hewitt expressed it clearly at his grave: This was why he chose Deckard for Evylin. He understood that Deckard’s desires aligned perfectly with hers and that he could be more than just her husband—he could truly offer her everything she deserved.
Hewitt’s final charge whispered to her: “He’s yours . . . Care for him the way he cares for you. He deserves that too.”
A soft smile came to Evylin’s lips. She turned her face up to Deckard, in awe of his goodness and worth. “I love you,” she whispered.
Deckard’s expression pinched with confusion before easing tenderly. “I love you,” he replied.
Evylin drew him close, their lips meeting with a light touch. It became so clear for her, everything she wanted for her life. Every question she had was whisked away in the memory of Hewitt’s words. “He’s yours.”
Evylin rested her forehead against her husband’s. “Can we stop?” she whispered, eyes closed as she reveled in the weight of his arm wrapped around her waist. “Just for the night, can we let this go and figure it out tomorrow?”
His nose brushed against hers as he nodded slowly. “If that’s what you want,” he replied, the words tickling her lips.
“That’s what I want,” she said, kissing him again.
Evylin surrendered to Deckard’s touch, embracing the yearning growing inside her. His fingers entwined in her hair, intensifying the kiss. She sensed his initial worries melting away as his passion flared. It was slow, fulfilling, and powerful.
The world was flawed, and their lives might never match their hopes, but perhaps that was for the better.
In her first twenty-six years, Deckard hadn’t appeared in her dreams, yet now, she found it hard to imagine a day without him.
She felt that anything she once wished for would be greatly lacking in his absence.
Still attired in their finery, it required some time and adjustment for them to proceed.
But soon, Deckard’s coat lay crumpled on the ground beside his boots, tossed there by Evylin.
The remainder of his apparel followed shortly thereafter.
Her lustrous dress lingered for a while longer due to the more intricate fastenings that they had to work through.
But soon enough, Deckard enfolded Evylin under the blankets. And as he kissed her, she knew her answer. She knew the future she wanted. For the first time ever, Evylin knew what was “more” and what was less in her life.
Now, she just needed to figure out how to tell him.