Remember the Star Forward

Prologue

Charlotte

It’s official. I’ve lost my mind.

When I’d suggested my insane idea to my other best friend, Wren, she was all for it. To be honest, if she wasn’t going to Harvard, I probably wouldn’t have taken the risk. So, this is actually all her fault.

But ultimately, I didn’t want to be stuck in my hometown of Portland alone and living in my little hermit box forever.

Now though, my bravery is wearing thin, and I wish I’d begged my parents to let me take online classes from the comfort of my bedroom.

Wren’s always been more “out there” than me. A complete extrovert to my introvert, but it’s been me and her since I can remember.

“This could be the start of something great for you. You need more excitement in your life. You never know, Jake could be a hottie.” She had said. Oh yeah? Then why do I feel like I’m about to throw up any minute?

She’s right about one thing: Jake could be hot.

Not that I would do anything about it-and not that I would know, because in all the years we’ve been talking, we’ve never exchanged photos.

He wanted to, but I’ve always been too nervous.

He’s a hockey player, and I’d always worried about not being pretty enough, or once the mystery was unveiled, he wouldn’t want to talk to me anymore.

As we get closer to college, my nerves begin to skyrocket and my heart feels like it’s beating out of my chest. I’m so close to telling my dad to turn this car around. What if Jake is an ax murderer, who has befriended me to trap me, and I end up dead in the bushes?

Resting my head back on the headrest, I close my eyes and gather myself, but I can’t switch my overthinking brain off. I need talking down off the ledge. On instinct, I dial Wren.

She answers on the first ring.

“Char, babe. I can feel your freakout from here,” she sighs down the speaker.

“I know, I know, but what if this is a mistake? I don’t even know what he looks like for Christ’s sake! This is all my fault, I should have exchanged photos when he suggested, I should...”

“Ok, stop right there.” I’m cut off from my rambling.

“I know you, Charlotte Louisa Bennett, and girl, even if you had seen his photo, you would still be like this. Jake knows you and he likes you. You are no different on paper than you are in person. So, in the nicest way possible, chill the fuck out.”

Rubbing my hands over my eyes, grateful I chose not to wear mascara today, I reply quietly, “I’ve never left Portland and my parents…”

“Will cope without you just fine, babe. Stop fishing for excuses.”

“Eugh, I know you’re right. I’m just so nervous. I’m so far out of my comfort zone I may as well be on another planet right now.”

“I am always right. Yes, this is something completely different, but this is going to be great for you, my little homebody. You need to be pushed out of familiar territory and try something new. I’m always at the end of the phone. You know that.”

“We’re just pulling up; I’d better go and seal my fate. Remember: you made me do this.”

She laughs. “Don’t be so dramatic. I didn’t make you fill in that application, I merely encouraged. It’s all going to work out great, you’ll see. I love you.”

“Love you too.” Hanging up, I pocket my phone and take a deep breath. Let’s get this over with.

As we arrive at my dorm building, there are students with boxes and suitcases everywhere I look, and I’m instantly filled with dread.

My hands are clammy as I twist them in my lap, trying to find a way to ease the anxiety taking over my body.

I don’t do well with crowded places. Breathe—I tell myself–it’s all going to be ok.

Seriously, Charlotte, what were you thinking?

At least my parents have paid extra for me to have a single room, thank God. I think they were so happy I’d decided to dip my toe out of my comfort zone they would have done anything to make that room happen for me, and boy, am I grateful.

I quickly send Jake a text letting him know I’m near and to keep a look out for my beloved white VW Beetle.

Getting out of the car, I take in my surroundings, tipping my head back to feel that Californian sun on my face for the first time.

It’s beautiful here, lots of palm trees and white imposing buildings. I like it, it has a good aura about it, and I truly think I could be happy here. If I can relax long enough to enjoy it.

It’s then I notice a guy in a black T-shirt and grey sweatpants looking around. He’s ridiculously good-looking, like Abercrombie & Fitch model good-looking.

My phone chimes.

Jake - I’m out front waiting.

Jake - Just remembered, you don’t know what I look like.

Jake - I’m in a black T-shirt and grey sweatpants.

He looks up from his phone and spots my car. His eyes light up as my heart gets lodged in my throat.

“Lottie, hey,” he shouts with a wave of his hand. There’s only one person who calls me Lottie.

Oh my god. It’s him.