Chapter 9
As the weekend approached, and Devon’s life geared up for the twins’ activities—team sports games and rehearsals and practices and homework, not to mention the infamous preparations for the field trip—she felt the tension building inside.
Her friend at work, Lindsay, mentioned that when she saw her a few days later.
“Hey, look, girl. You need to come up with something for yourself in all this so you don’t get completely overwhelmed in the needs of the kids.”
Devon frowned at her. “That makes sense, but—”
“No, no buts,” she stated quickly. “You can’t just always do everything for the kids and lose everything about the life you used to have. And I get it. You worked a lot before, but you were also working on having your own business. You were working on all kinds of stuff.”
“I’m still doing it.”
“Yeah, but you really aren’t.”
Devon groaned. “When I think about having my own business now, all I can think about is that it might make a little more money. So, I want to do more, but—”
“Yes, and there is no shortage of buts because you’re looking at it from a money perspective,” her work friend pointed out.
“So, we get it, all of us get it,” she declared, motioning at the office behind her.
“But you also need to do some de-stressing. … Are the twins old enough to be left on their own for hours?” she asked, staring at Devon.
“I thought they stayed alone sometimes, and, with their mother being sick, they had to sometimes out of necessity.”
Devon grimaced. “During Tabitha’s extended illness, we tried to get the child care covered as much as we could.
Yet, for the most part, they’re very self-reliant.
They’ll be eleven soon, and I don’t even know what I’m supposed to do about that.
In the past, birthdays have always been fairly low-key, as they just really wanted to be around their mom.
” Devon sighed. “This time, I don’t know what the answer will be.
” She groaned slightly. “I suspect it’ll be emotional, one way or another. ”
“Yes, absolutely it will be,” Lindsay confirmed, with a wince. She glanced back at the office and offered, “Maybe I’ll see if we can create a fund for the kids’ birthday this year because this one will be especially rough.”
“Everybody has been so helpful that I hesitate for you to do that. Yet I agree. This year will be rough on their birthday,” Devon replied, then laughed. “It feels as if I’ve got ghosts in my world.”
“You do,” Lindsay murmured, without even thinking about it.
Devon stared at Lindsay, but her friend smiled and then explained, “Think about all the people you’ve lost in your life.
Think about all the people the kids have lost in their lives.
Of course you have ghosts,” she declared, with a shrug, “but that doesn’t mean that the ghosts are there to hurt you, and it certainly doesn’t mean that the ghosts are there to cause you trouble in any way. ” And, with that, she was gone again.
It was classic Lindsay to make a shocking comment and then run away, leaving everybody just staring after her. And yet it wasn’t a bad comment, and it certainly wasn’t a wrong comment.
But it made Devon stop and think. Was there anything wrong with these ghostly visitations?
Was there a reason why the ghosts were there at her new home?
Probably. Just because Devon didn’t know what that reason was, it didn’t matter, did it?
As long as they had nothing to do with her and the kids—outside of visiting.
Maybe they were just keeping an eye out for them?
As the days went by and as the twins’ birthday approached, she talked to the kids and asked them what they wanted to do.
Tabby spoke first. “I want to go to Mom’s grave. I want to go out for breakfast, and I want to play with my friends.”
“What about a party?” Devon prodded.
“I don’t want a party. I don’t want all that, not with the looks of pity from everybody,” Tabby replied, her tears already forming. “I’ll pass.”
It was heartbreaking for Devon to hear, yet it was also a bit of a relief to think she wouldn’t have to come up with a party this year, something she really didn’t know much about. Devon nodded. “That sounds doable.” She turned to Toby. “And what about you?”
He shrugged. “It’ll be a tough day anyway,” he muttered. “So just staying home is fine. I don’t really want to do anything to celebrate the day when Mom’s not here.”
Devon totally got where he was coming from, but was it healthy? “I get that too,” she muttered. “Where do you want to go for food? Should we go out to a restaurant for breakfast? And what about gifts?”
They both perked up, but Tabby stated, “You don’t have any money for gifts.”
“I don’t know whether I do or I don’t,” Devon clarified, “because I don’t know what things you’re looking for. Do you want to go shopping at the mall and get some new clothes? Do you want a new computer game?”
“Yes.” Toby nodded. “I want a computer game.”
And he named one that she already knew was in the $80 range, though it seemed as if everything was in that range right now. She nodded. “Okay, I can put that down as a possibility.”
A shadow crossed his face. “You don’t have to. I know we don’t have the money.”
She smiled at him and pointed out, “You can’t know such a thing because I don’t even know. We haven’t even had a full month in the house yet to know how the bills will work out. So, let’s just start with what we want, and I’ll do what I can to see if we can get it.”
Toby shrugged and muttered, “Whatever.” Then he got up from the table and went to his room.
Devon sighed as she stared after him. She knew it would be hard, but some days it just seemed as if she didn’t quite know what to say to anybody.
Then Tabby piped up, “He’s fine.”
“Is he?” Devon asked, still looking after him as he went out of sight.
“Yeah, he’s fine. We are. We’re both fine.” And, with that, she got up, gave Devon a big hug, and quickly ran away.
Without a doubt Tabby was going up to her room to cry.
As bad as Devon felt in that moment, she was grateful that, even in these difficult circumstances, the three of them had a decent relationship.
Devon felt very lucky to have these kids, who were as understanding as they were and not as greedy as so many others, as she heard from a lot of parents.
It was one thing to try to help kids who were demanding and had no understanding of their situation, but totally different with her twins.
As she thought of some of the horror stories she’d heard from other people, it felt as if Devon had won the lottery in a way and vowed to appreciate the twins a little more.
Yawning, she headed to bed.
Thankfully no spectral visitors had been around, and that reminded her of what Camden had mentioned about the ghost being familiar. She bolted out of bed, frozen in place. He didn’t mean familiar, familiar, did he? She pulled out her phone and called him.
“Hey,” he answered. “Problems?”
She realized that reaction implied that every time she contacted him there was a problem. “No, it’s just, I remembered what you asked.”
“What did I ask?” he noted in confusion.
She took a deep breath and replied, “What you asked about the ghost being familiar.”
“Right. And is it familiar? Are they familiar?”
“No,” she stated. “God, no. But, when you asked that, I was trying to figure out what it was you were thinking, why you would ask that.” Then out of the blue in that moment, it just clicked, and she whispered, “Oh my God! You think it’s their mother, don’t you?”
*
Camden replied, “Look. I don’t know. I guess I just wondered if you got any sense of identity from the visitations.
I can’t tell you that it was her or that it wasn’t.
All I can say is that I wondered if you felt any sense of familiarity to it.
” He hesitated and added, “It would make some sense if it was their mother, and you two were very close, weren’t you? ”
“Yes, we were best friends and very close. … I just can’t see how—”
“If you’re saying it’s not, then that’s fine,” he interjected.
“I don’t really know what to say, but wouldn’t it be way too early to know?”
“Yes, … generally speaking. Unless she was really worried about the kids.”
Devon pursed her lips then clarified, “I don’t know that she would be worried about the kids.
I’ve been around them their whole lives, looked after them for a very long time.
So Tabitha should feel okay about their being with me.
Thus she shouldn’t be at any level of unrest, and that’s also important to remember.
” Then she groaned. “I don’t know about unrest, but you’re making me feel as if maybe she’s checking in. ”
“If they were your kids, and you had passed over, but you had the ability to check in, what would you do?”
“I would absolutely check in,” she stated, her tone grim.
“But it doesn’t feel like her, does it?”
She gave a broken laugh. “How the hell would I even know?” she muttered.
“I mean, I’m not getting any sense or clues that it’s her.
I’m not getting any feeling of … I don’t even know what to say.
But it’s not as if I’m looking at this shimmering thing and noting, Hey, it’s you. ” She scrunched up her nose.
He burst out laughing at that. “That’s probably a good thing.”
She groaned. “I get that to you some of this is probably normal,” she pointed out, “but to me? This is all very far-fetched.”
“No, it’s not,” he countered. “I’m not sure what your experience has been with this sort of thing, but you are way, way too calm for this to not have been something you’ve been aware of in the past.”
“Seeing things? Maybe,” she conceded, “but communicating and talking with them? That’s a whole different story. Plus I’m trying to not scare the kids.”
“So, you have seen them before in your life?”
“Maybe,” she replied cautiously. “I mean, not really. And it’s not as if I’ve had any communication with them.”