Repo’d His Heart

Chapter 1

Solana Thomas

“Sunshyne, put your seatbelt back on. You know when I’m driving you don’t get out your seat.”

“But mama I’m hungry. I wanna get a snack.” Sunshyne poked her lips out at me as she buckled herself back in.

“I’m about to stop soon, then you can get something. Okay, love bug?” I asked softly, stealing a glance at her chubby chocolate cheeks in the rearview mirror.

“Oookay mama. When we get to your work can I pick out a snack before bed?”

I let out a sigh. I could never tell Sunshine no. “Of course, baby.”

Sunshyne was my entire world, and I had no idea where I would be without her.

For the last three years it has been the two of us.

After Sonni, my husband, who was barely a husband, more like a nigga set on making my life miserable, passed away in a robbery gone wrong.

Since then, my life seemed like nothing but a bunch of blurred images passing me by.

The only person that I could see clearly was Sunshyne.

She is literally the reason I get up every day.

If I didn’t have her, I would probably be in the ground with Sonni.

Not because I was madly in love with him, but I would have been sitting right next to him in his car when he was robbed.

Sunshyne had been my saving grace in my life.

Growing up my mama, Judy, raised me to the best of her abilities, though her “best” was questionable, at times.

Mr. Pete was my mom’s current and longest boyfriend; they’d been together since I was nineteen.

Before Mr. Pete, my mom was man crazy and never stayed single longer than two weeks.

Men came and went. Sometimes, the new nigga came before the old one had a chance to leave.

On the bright side, my mama didn’t let any harm come my way, if one of the men she dealt with came off as too friendly towards me, they’d be right out the door.

My mom felt a woman needed a man to be able to function properly, something we always disagreed on.

In addition to keeping a man, my mom prided herself on her looks.

She always made sure to keep up her appearance and even to this day, she kept her hair and nails together.

If there was a choice between a bill and her hair just know my mama was getting her hair done.

I’m sure she’d have something smart to say if she saw what I looked like now.

That’s where we’d often bump heads. In my mom’s head if you didn’t look the part, you wouldn’t find another man.

She couldn’t comprehend I didn’t want another man, Sonni ruined my views on all niggas.

My heart was still fixing everything Sonni had broken.

with his fake ass illusion of a grand life, we were supposed to have together.

In reality the nigga was a wolf in sheep’s clothing making promises he could never keep.

I met Sonni back in high school, he was a popular football player, and I was just a regular degular high school girl.

All the girls, me included, had crushes on Sonni, even in his high school years Sonni was fine.

We never crossed paths in high school; I just admired him from afar.

We didn’t meet again until I was about twenty-one and he was twenty-two.

I worked as a bottle girl; college wasn’t in the cards for me.

I hated school as is, there was no way I would be willing to go to school on my own accord.

I didn’t know what I wanted to do with myself but definitely not college.

It wasn’t like my parents cared about what I did.

I never knew my dad, and my mom refused to talk about him.

My mom was more concerned with finding a man to take care of me.

So, when Sonni came to the club I worked in I was shocked he asked me for my number.

I remember being so giddy my high school crush had finally asked me out.

From there Sonni took me out on a date, and I fell hard and fast. A lot of things have changed since high school though.

Sonni wasn’t the same popular athlete, he was a harden street nigga.

Or that’s what he pretended to be after he tore his ACL as soon as he was drafted and his team the Beaumont Timbers dropped him.

Sonni said he was devastated but he had a family to feed so he got put on by his older brother and never looked back.

The thing was Sonni wasn’t a street nigga like his older brothers.

He hid behind their street status and pretended he was like that.

I can’t lie; I was fascinated with Sonni’s bad boy lifestyle he showed me.

I’d ride shotgun with him while he did whatever illegal activities he did.

In my head I was his Bonnie, ready to do whatever for my man.

I believed with every fiber of my being that Sonni was my forever person.

In six months, we’d moved in together and were expecting our first child.

I was riding on my high horse when life brought me back to reality.

I found out I wasn’t Sonni’s only one, just one of many in his little fucked up fantasy.

Sonni didn’t come home for two days in a row and that wasn’t normal for him.

He’d at least call to check on me and the baby.

I decided to pop up over at his parents to see if they’d heard from him.

Imagine my surprise when I see they’re having a party that turned out to be a gender reveal party.

Guess who the parents were, Sonni and some girl that I’d never seen before.

It was funny now, but then I was crushed to the point I crashed out.

I mean I tore up the entire party, knocked over the cake, and destroyed a bunch of presents.

You name it I did, I made sure everyone there felt my pain.

Including my unborn baby, I’d stressed myself so much I miscarried shortly after my fit of rage.

I didn’t know if I was coming or going after that and when Sonni finally showed up he had the audacity to be mad at me because I lost our baby.

I was so stunned by his lack of remorse.

He blamed me for everything and somehow, he convinced me it was my fault.

I guess that was how he’d kept me under his thumb for so long he knew all the words to say to make me see things his way.

From that day forward our dynamic changed, I became dependent on Sonni to be able to breathe the right.

My mind was officially under the control of Sonni.

He was my drug of choice and he knew it too.

For years I followed behind him like a lost puppy.

Whatever Sonni wanted from me I did. It wasn’t one way either, Sonni was just as crazy about me too, but he didn’t want to be faithful.

After all the back and forth Gretchen, his baby mama, the girl from the gender reveal, I called myself being tired.

I packed all my bags and sent Sonni a text that told him I was done.

That was the day I saw the other side of him, the one that could take my life and not blink twice.

Sonni was far from a killer, but he was the type of nigga that would rather see me dead than with another nigga.

I went back to my mom’s house, of course she talked her shit because Sonni put money in her pocket.

She didn’t see the issue with the stuff Sonni did as long as he was a provider.

It was crazy because I knew she’d never deal with a man that did half of the stuff Sonni did, but I guess money changed her mind.

It wasn’t a shocker when Sonni showed up at my mom’s house.

What was, was the gun he placed to my head, when he said if he can’t have me then no one can, I believe him.

The empty look in his eyes told me everything I needed to know.

Fearing for my life I went back home with him.

I don’t know why I expected my mom to care when I told her what he did.

My mom scoffed at me as she told me I should have stayed home then.

Sonni was on some fatal attraction stuff, and I hated that for me.

I was deeply depressed for the year that came after that.

Just existing, wasn’t much else for me to do.

Sonni wanted me at home taking care of his house and his daughter Niyah whenever she came over.

I did what he wanted but I wasn’t happy.

I still had love for Sonni, but I feared what he would do to me if I left.

He always told me he refused to live without me and instead of joy I felt fear.

There would be something in his eyes that didn’t sit right with me.

Slowly he started to reveal the real him… his inner bitch.

As time went on it felt like Sonni was obsessed with me, he always wanted to know where I was, who I was with, how long I was going to be there.

If I wasn’t home, he’d call my phone non-stop until I got so irritated I came home.

Sonni suffocated me with what he called love, and it never made sense to me because he loved me so much, but he couldn’t be faithful to save his life.

Aside from Gretchen there were so many other females wanting to fight me because they wanted to be his main girl not knowing I would have happily given them my title.

The nigga wasn’t worth the hype. Sonni literally rode off the coattails of his brothers.

I started to see how little respect he really had in the streets.

He really had me fooled but I couldn’t blame anyone besides myself.