30. Chapter 30
Chapter thirty
JUDE GRAVES
Even if we’ve gone over the plan a thousand times, it still feels like everything could fall apart at any second.
And I’m really fucking hoping it doesn’t.
I didn’t fight back enough against Nolan, and because of that, Alexei happened.
I didn’t stand up once I had Emma back in my life.
I was a fucking coward who was desperate not to feel the discomfort of withdrawal who ended up just feeling the pain of torture.
I’m never letting anyone control me again.
I’m never letting anyone scare me into shrinking myself again.
Fuck that. I don’t give a damn if Alexei releases everything on me at this event.
I’d rather be behind bars for the rest of my life than ever be someone’s attack dog.
Because even if I was in prison…I’d still be free.
The motherfucker believes that the added public pressure will sway me?
Laughable.
Adela and Nico managed to break through most of Alexei’s systems, and now they’re working on combining his files with Nolan’s into a single secure folder. If it works, it changes everything.
That folder is sitting on a flash drive in Rafe’s pocket. They’d be able to scrub my involvement entirely, leaving only Alexei’s sins behind. Sins that he fucking forced upon me.
Every time they start talking about encryption or routing or whatever the hell else they do, I can barely keep up without feeling a headache coming on. But I trust them. I have to.
Emma shifts beside me, tense, even though she’s obviously trying not to show it.
I glance up into the rearview mirror, catching Rafe’s icy gaze for a brief second before he turns his attention back to the road.
He’s driving Emma and me while everyone else follows in a van behind.
Adela made it clear we don’t leave Heather or Adriana alone at the cabin.
Not tonight. Not with Alexei’s men still moving.
So everyone’s involved in this in one way or another, whether we like it or not.
The car slows beneath a canopy of gold light and falling snow.
And for a moment, I just stare through the tinted window at the building ahead of us, my pulse thudding beneath my ribs as memories start to crawl their way back under my skin.
The banquet hall rises from the center of Moscow, all ivory stone and massive glass windows glowing warm against the winter dark. Valets move through the snowfall in black coats while luxury cars line the entrance in an endless procession. It’s elegant and deadly.
Ugh, fuck.
I know exactly what kind of people are inside.
Men with blood under their fingernails, hidden beneath diamond cufflinks.
Women draped in silk beside monsters they pretend not to notice.
He must have invited a shit ton of predators who are dressed like royalty.
And somewhere inside that building is Alexei.
My stomach twists so violently I almost feel the urge to vomit.
Beside me, Emma notices my wince. Her hand slides gently over mine, where it rests against my knee. “Stay with me,” she says softly.
I nod once, though the motion feels stiff.
Rafe opens his door first, cold air rushing into the vehicle as snowflakes spiral through the light outside. “Remember,” he says calmly, adjusting the cuffs of his black coat. “You only need to survive long enough for Adela to finish. She’s right there. We could release his shit instead of yours.”
I swallow hard. Long enough. That’s the mission.
My fingers flex once against my thigh before I force myself to move.
The cold hits immediately when I step out of the car, sharp enough to sting my lungs when I inhale.
Snow crunches beneath my boots as I look around, noticing the party is very much black tie.
Luckily, since Rafe and I are about the same size, he lent me one of his suits. And Emma is in one of Adela’s dresses.
She steps out behind me a second later, and for a heartbeat, everything else disappears.
Fuck.
She looks beautiful.
The dark red dress she’s wearing clings softly to her body beneath her coat, her hair falling in loose waves around her shoulders while snowflakes melt against her skin. She catches me staring and offers the faintest smile, though I can see the tension beneath it.
She’s scared, too.
Rafe moves ahead first, one hand slipping casually into his pocket while his sharp gaze tracks every entrance, every security guard, every shadow near the doors.
I force myself to walk, each step toward the entrance feeling heavier than the one before it.
Because the closer we get, the more my body remembers this place.
Not the building itself, but the feeling of a performance and ownership.
I can already feel an invisible leash tightening around my throat again.
The doors open before we reach them, and warmth welcomes us, smelling like expensive perfume and liquor, and polished wood. The sound of orchestral music reaches my ears, and again, I wince. I feel like I am here with Adriana instead of Emma for a split second.
Fucking dammit.
I hate this. These memories need to fuck off for a while so I can actually focus. I know what Alexei made me into in rooms exactly like this.
Crystal chandeliers burn overhead while guests glide across marble floors in black suits and glittering gowns.
Emma moves closer beside me, just enough that her shoulder brushes mine. I anchor myself to the feeling immediately so I don’t lose my shit.
Don’t disappear.
Rafe guides us deeper into the building without hesitation, his composure almost unnatural.
The further we move, the louder the orchestra becomes.
Though it weaves with loud bursts of laughter from the evil pieces of shit in attendance tonight.
I don’t know all of them, but Alexei has them here for a reason, I’m sure.
I glance up, focusing on the chandeliers. My body remembers standing under lights, high as fuck, while Alexei watched from the shadows, as if he owned every goddamn breath I took. Because he did.
A hand touches my arm lightly. “You’re drifting,” Emma murmurs.
I blink hard, realizing the edges of the hallway have started blurring again.
Fuck.
The beginnings of derealization creep in slowly now instead of crashing over me all at once, but that almost makes it worse because I can feel myself slipping while it’s happening.
“I’m okay,” I lie quietly.
Her eyes soften in that way that tells me she knows I’m lying. But before she can answer, the atmosphere in the hallway changes, and my entire body locks before I even fully see him.
Alexei stands near the entrance to the banquet hall, one hand in his pocket, dressed in an immaculate black suit that makes him look like even more of a monster. And beside him—
Erik and Vlad.
My lungs forget how to work.
Vlad’s dark eyes drag over me possessively while Erik leans casually against the wall beside him, blue eyes glittering with amusement like he already knows exactly how badly I’m fighting not to come apart. He’s the one who butchered my veins again and again after all.
The world tilts sideways, and my fingers twitch.
Obey. Kill.
Alexei smiles slowly when he sees the tension hit me. “So nice to see you,” he murmurs, accent heavy. “My beautiful, little rockstar.”
Every muscle in my body tightens. Beside me, Emma’s fingers close around my wrist immediately. I latch onto it, hard.
Alexei notices that too. His gaze drifts toward Emma briefly before returning to me, something darker flickering beneath his amusement now. “You came back willingly,” he says softly.
Rafe steps forward before I can answer. “The agreement was clear.”
Alexei’s eyes remain on me anyway. I’m not finding words to speak right now. And fuck, I hate that part of me still reacts to his attention instinctively. Like prey recognizing the predator that trained it.
“You’ll perform first,” Alexei says. “Then we discuss the details of your surrender. Because I assume that’s what’s happening here today.” His gaze flicks to Rafe. “This place is much more secure. No room for a gunfight, Vaughan.”
He smiles like it’s nothing.
My jaw locks.
Emma’s thumb brushes once against the inside of my wrist.
Stay here.
Stay with her.
Alexei finally smiles again. “Try not to embarrass me tonight, Jude. Be on your best behavior, and nothing more will be released.” He bites his lip when he looks at Emma again. “And everyone you love will be safe. But only if you really surrender to me. Got that?”
I nod. And he walks away, joining Erik and Vlad once more at the edge of the room.
My chest twists at the familiarity in his tone.
I got so used to it that my body automatically responds.
But before the feeling can fully drag me under, Emma steps slightly into my line of sight.
And suddenly she’s the only thing I see.
Honey brown eyes drag me back from the edge, and my pulse slows enough for me to breathe again.
I’m not grounding myself in fear anymore.
I’m grounding myself in her.
Rafe walks slightly ahead, composed as always. Static crackles faintly through the comm in my ear before Adela’s voice slips through.
“We’re close,” she murmurs. “Very fucking close. Just keep him distracted a little longer.”
I swallow hard and keep walking. Because that’s all I can do right now.
The deeper we move into the theater, the more the atmosphere around me changes.
Conversations soften when people recognize me.
Eyes follow me openly, lingering too long without shame or hesitation.
Nobody here looks disturbed by the photos Alexei released.
If anything, they seem fascinated by them, amused in the same detached way wealthy people admire something beautiful and violent so long as it doesn’t touch them directly.
Goddamn vultures.