47. Chapter 47
Chapter forty-seven
EMMA EASTON
The bonfire crackles loudly against the summer night while music drifts softly from the speakers mounted beneath the porch overhang.
Warm wind carries the scent of smoke and saltwater through the backyard while everyone crowds together beneath hanging string lights and stars.
Everyone is out here. Micah, Heather, Finnick, Kami, Rafe, Adela, Vanessa, Rachel, and Alaric.
I sit curled against Jude’s side in one of the oversized wooden chairs surrounding the firepit, my legs draped over his lap while his fingers absentmindedly trace patterns along my bare knee. He hasn’t stopped smiling since the concert. None of us has.
His hair is still damp from a shower, messy beneath the glow of the fire.
The silver rings on his fingers flash every time he moves his bottle of sparkling water beneath the firelight, and every once in a while, he leans over just to kiss my shoulder or temple.
Seeing him so relaxed like this, in his black hoodie with a smile on his face, makes me happier than I could ever put into words.
Micah is laughing so hard across the fire that he nearly spills his drink all over Heather’s lap while she shoves him away with a horrified screech.
“Oh my god,” she laughs. “Dammit, Meekah.”
“Meekah?” Kami snorts. “Our little Micah has a nickname now, huh?”
Heather grins. “He sure does. And he loves it.”
Micah rolls his eyes. “Whatever, blondie.”
“I think I’m going to like living here,” Kami giggles, and Finnick kisses her cheek before taking a sip from his IPA.
“Yeah,” Finnick adds. “Plus, I love the fucking mountains.”
We all smile at that. Jude nearly cried when Kami called him with the news of them moving out here.
Rafe and Adela are sharing a blanket nearby, snuggled up while he lazily plays with her fingers. “Hey,” Adela says, pointing toward all of us with her wine glass. “When you guys tour in New York again, you’re staying with us.”
Rafe hums in agreement. “We have plenty of room.”
“And I already miss you people,” she adds dramatically. “You’re emotionally attached to me forever. Plus, my favorite band is back together, and I am demanding a song be written about our adventures.” She shoots a glare at Jude. “Got it?”
Jude laughs. “Got it.”
His chest vibrates softly against my shoulder while he watches them, and for a second, I don’t even look at the fire anymore because I’m too busy looking at him instead. At the way he lets people love him openly, and no longer flinches every time someone touches him unexpectedly.
Therapy has changed him in little ways. I love seeing him playing music from his soul again. He’s been an avid writer since returning home.
Nova nuzzles my leg with her rope. I chuckle, sitting up straight when I snatch it. “I’ve played with you all evening, girl.”
“Aw, she missed you,” Heather says with a smile.
“She’s my baby,” I say, my voice jumping as my body jolts from her pulling on it. “Of course she missed me.”
Heather suddenly gasps. “Wait,” she says, pointing between us. “When are you two having kids?”
I nearly choke on my drink and fall over from Nova tugging harder.
Jude snorts, watching my inevitable defeat.
“Oh my god,” I wheeze.
“What?” Heather asks innocently.
“You can’t just launch that at people like a grenade,” Jude laughs. And it’s a laugh that reminds me of when we first fell in love.
Heather shrugs unapologetically. “You guys would make beautiful children.”
“Terrifyingly beautiful children,” Kami adds.
“Those kids would come out wearing black hoodies,” Finnick interjects.
Jude laughs harder, ducking his head while I hide my burning face against his shoulder.
“We’re making up for lost time first,” I explain finally, still laughing. “That’s the plan right now.”
Jude nods softly beside me. “Yeah. We’re happy either way.” His voice quiets slightly after that, though the smile never fully leaves his face. “If it happens someday, amazing,” he says. “And if not…” His thumb brushes absentmindedly over my knee. “I still get her.”
Emotion catches unexpectedly in my chest.
Heather makes the softest wounded sound imaginable.
“Jude, you would be the best dad,” Micah informs him, his voice more serious.
He smiles up at his best friend. “Thanks, man.”
Another moment passes between them, staring at one another. None of us will ever truly understand everything they went through together, or the bond they share.
“I did have a dream once,” I whisper, and everyone looks at me. “It was of us and our…” I look up at him, realizing that I never told him about the dream. “Daughter.”
An emotion I can’t quite place flashes across his face.
Vanessa leans forward from beside Rachel and Alaric. “Okay, so hypothetically,” she says, “if you had a girl someday, what would you name her?”
I glance instinctively toward Jude. The second our eyes meet, something soft shifts across his features because he already knows the answer.
We’ve talked about it before, quietly in bed late at night when sleep wouldn’t come easily.
We were talking about our future, and what it could look like.
He then told me about this name and why it mattered. And after that, he asked my permission.
And I agreed.
Jude looks back toward the fire. “Rose,” he says softly.
Heather tilts her head. “Why Rose?”
For a second, the fire crackles between all of us while Jude stares into the flames.
And then he answers quietly. “Because they grow in impossible places.” His voice stays calm, though emotion flickers briefly across his face.
“Through concrete, through cold…through anything.” A pause.
“And they’re still beautiful and soft. Even after everything. ”
Silence settles gently around the fire afterward. My heart swells, and my throat constricts.
“I love that,” Vanessa murmurs. “It makes sense for what you’ve endured.”
I look at him carefully while the firelight dances across the sharp lines of his face.
He hasn’t told me he forgives Adriana. Maybe he never will.
But therapy has helped him begin speaking about her differently.
He’s told me that there’s this tight knot in his chest when it comes to her.
Hate, sadness, and anger are tangled together so much that sometimes, I can see it hurting him.
So one night, I sat him down and told him that I would support him fully if he let it all go. She’s gone.
Jude glances toward me then, catching me staring. “What?” he asks softly.
I smile. “Nothing.”
Later, after more drinks and too much laughing, and Micah eventually trying to fight Finnick with a marshmallow skewer, I slip quietly away from the fire toward the dock.
The wood creaks softly beneath my feet while warm, salty wind moves through my hair, carrying distant music and laughter from the house behind me.
Moonlight pours across the water while the stars above shine brighter than ever.
Peaceful. Finally peaceful.
Within moments, I hear footsteps behind me. Jude’s arms slide around my waist the second he reaches me, pulling me back gently against his chest while he presses a soft kiss beneath my ear.
“There you are,” he murmurs.
I smile, leaning back into him, his hoodie warmed from the fire.
For a while, neither of us says anything.
We just stand there together at the end of the dock listening to the ocean around us while laughter drifts faintly from the bonfire behind us.
And then Jude turns me gently in his arms before kissing me.
His hand slides against my jaw while I melt into him, fingers tangling into the hair at the nape of his neck. His tongue parts my lips and swirls over mine. When we finally pull apart, we’re both smiling.
The sound of more footsteps reaches us a moment later. His parents and sister appear, all three of them wearing Dissonance hoodies.
“Hey, you two,” Rachel says warmly. “My rockstar.”
Jude laughs quietly. “Am I in trouble?”
“Always,” Vanessa answers, adjusting the messy bun on top of her head.
Alaric snorts.
Rachel walks straight toward her son before wrapping both arms around him tightly, and without hesitation, Jude hugs her back just as hard.
My chest aches as I watch him like this.
Rachel pulls back before reaching up to touch his face gently, emotion already shining visibly in her blue eyes. “I’m so proud of you, my boy,” she whispers.
Jude’s throat visibly tightens. “Mom…”
“You fought so hard to come back to us,” she says softly. “And you did. I knew you would.”
Vanessa wraps her arms around both of them from the side while Alaric steps closer behind them, resting one hand firmly against Jude’s shoulder.
And then Rachel tilts her head. “Nicholas would’ve loved calling you his big brother if he were still here.”
The words hit. I see it happen instantly.
Jude’s face crumples softly beneath the moonlight before tears spill freely down his cheeks, but he’s smiling through them even as Rachel pulls him into another hug.
A real smile. One filled with grief and love and healing all at once.
For someone who drowned in guilt and shame for his actions for so long…
hearing her say that meant the world to him. I know it did.
His shoulders shake slightly while he buries his face briefly against her hair, and when his eyes finally lift again over her shoulder toward me, something inside my chest breaks wide open at the look on his face.
It’s not emptiness or pain anymore.
It’s…love.