Chapter 9
ZIVREN
Iget home in the early morning hours to a quiet, dark house.
Everyone’s asleep, and soon I will join them.
I keep my steps light when I enter the bedroom I share with June, and quickly wash up after a long, exhausting day at work.
It was a stressful day but equally rewarding.
We saved multiple lives from that old apartment above Bushqawe’s Noodles, which is a miracle given how many code violations there were.
I’m impressed it took this long to go up in flames.
I find myself smiling as I towel off my skin, eager for June to wake up so I can tell her about it.
This is the first time I’ve had someone to share my good news with.
It’s nice. Since bringing Akkal into the world, I’ve felt there was something missing.
A significant piece that would make us feel whole.
I didn’t know what it was or how to fill it.
I just knew it was there. The more time June spends with us, I’m starting to realize it’s her.
The night is warm, and I decide to forgo my standard night shirt and wear only my shorts to bed. As I leave the washroom and round the corner of the dark bedroom, I hear an, “Oof,” as June walks straight into me.
“Oh shit,” she whisper-screams. “I’m sorry, I didn’t see you.”
She sounds as if she’s out of breath. “Are you well?”
“No, I’m not well! I’m sweating my tits off.”
“Errr, what?”
She steps around me and scurries into the washroom, turning the light on and hovering over the sink. “Look at me,” she whimpers, staring at her reflection. “Fucking soaked.”
It’s a warmer night than we’ve had lately, but not enough to create this much perspiration.
June’s yellow hair is damp and sticking to her face.
There’s a sweat line running from the neck of her light gray shirt to her belly, and matching wet marks beneath her armpits.
Worry fills my stomach as my limited medical training kicks in.
“Come, sit.” I guide her to the small bench next to the wash box and gather her hair off her neck. She always keeps an elastic on her wrist, and I use that to pull it into a knot on top of her head, and then press a cool, wet towel against her forehead.
She tries batting my hands away, but her movements are slow and she misses. “Ugh, I’m so gross right now. You don’t want to touch me.”
What a foolish assumption. Since she first appeared in my line of vision, I’ve thought of little else beyond touching her. “Incorrect. You’re not gross, but you may be ill.”
She lets out a snort. “Perimenopause isn’t a disease. Although maybe it should be. Then doctors might actually take the time to learn about it.”
“What is peree––” I begin, trying to repeat the unfamiliar word as I lift each eyelid and examine her pupils. Then I lift her top lip to check the color of her gums. “What is that?”
“Oh, it’s this fun little biological phase people with ovaries go through.
It means my eggs are shriveling up, and my ability to create life is ending.
Which is fine. Being in my forties, it’s not like I had my heart set on getting pregnant at this point.
I just hoped I could ease into the end of my fertility with some grace, and not, you know,” she gestures to her face and sweat-stained shirt, “this.”
“So this has happened before?” I ask, relieved. Beyond checking her baseline vital signs, I have no idea what kind of medical necessities a human has. If I had to bring June to the hospital, I don’t think I’d be able to leave her side.
“Yup,” she replies with a pop of the P at the end. “This is a hot flash. I sweat buckets for about five minutes, then it stops.”
All she needs is to cool down? I can fix that.
“Come.” I take her hand and lead her back into the bedroom.
I pull her in front of my body when we’re next to the window facing the far wall.
There’s a small air conditioning unit shaped like a hexagonal sapphire.
I press the On button on the left side, and it begins blasting cold air directly onto June’s face and neck.
“You’re kidding me. That’s what this thing does?
” She tilts her head back to look at me.
“I had one in my house as well, and I was too intimidated to mess with it. I thought it was a piece of art I didn’t understand.
” She lets out a moan of pleasure as she leans forward and pulls on the neck of her shirt, letting the cold air reach her chest.
While she’s distracted, I reach down and adjust myself in my shorts so she can’t tell how obvious my erection is.
Though, if she keeps making those noises, I’m not sure how I’m going to survive the night.
I’ve had to find times throughout the day to escape to the washroom simply to stroke my cock and provide temporary relief.
Because temporary is all it is. As soon as she bends over or runs her fingers through her hair or puts food in her mouth, I’m right back to where I was––hard and in agony.
“Oh fuck, that’s so good,” she whimpers.
Precome seeps through the front of my shorts.
She turns around so the air can hit the back of her neck, and I realize how close we are. Her nipples are poking through her shirt, gently scraping against my bare chest with each breath she takes.
Her face is relaxed as her eyes flutter closed and she says, “Mm, I needed this.”
I grunt, trying to hold onto the final scraps of my control.
“I saw you today, you know.”
When I drop my gaze to hers, I’m stunned by the pure adoration beaming out of her. “You did?”
“Mm hm. Me and Akkal. You were carrying that lizard-thing down the ladder.”
This kind of focused attention makes me feel strange. I’m not used to it. The safest way to navigate it, I’ve found, is to acknowledge the facts and nothing more. “Ah, yes. It was an efficient rescue mission.”
“Pfft, I’ll say.”
My eyes have gotten accustomed to the darkness of the room, and I can see the pinkening of her cheeks.
“You’re a hero.”
“I-No, I was simply doing––”
She cuts me off with, “I’m so proud of you, Ziv.”
The tension crackles between us as primal need pumps through my blood.
I’m losing it. I’m trying to keep myself composed, but her praise turns my self-control into water slipping through my fingers.
I press my palm against the wall above her head, leaning in ever so slightly.
I can’t help it. My body is no longer mine.
It’s hers. I’m completely at her command. “You are?”
She nods, her teeth biting into her bottom lip.
I want to do so many things to her, most of which I’ve never done to anyone. But I want to make her feel good. I have to make her feel good.
Suddenly her lips are right there. I lower myself until our faces are at the same level. “June, this is… I…” I trail off as she closes the distance.
Then she snaps her head back, brows pinched as she pokes a finger into my chest. “Wait. I thought you hated me.”
The idea of me hating her is such a ridiculous concept a laugh rips through me. “What?”
“I mean, you seem so uncomfortable around me.” She’s scratching her head, gaze dropping to the floor. “Whenever I accidentally get near you, you recoil like I’m diseased.”
I shake my head. “No. No, I could never hate you, June.” I crook my finger beneath her chin, lifting it until her eyes meet mine. “Never.”
“Then why? Why do you act like that around me?” She crosses her arms over her chest, and I worry my awkwardness has ruined this precious moment where her body was pressed against mine, where I was this close to being able to hold her the way I’ve held her only in my dreams. “I figured you thought humans were gross, or maybe I was.”
Ficq. I run a rough hand through my hair, trying to find a way out of this mess I’ve made.
How can I explain to her I haven’t been able to think straight since she agreed to be my fake mate because the mere sight of her causes my entire body to tighten with need?
How can I say anything different to the female in charge of caring for my son without destroying the trust we’ve built?
How do I proceed honestly while remaining on this side of the razor-thin line between boss and creep?
I’m not sure it’s possible to keep the boundaries we have if I reveal the truth. Even a fraction of it would change things. I’m also not sure I care anymore.
I heave a sigh and place my hands on the wall again, caging her in, needing her to understand. To truly hear me. “June, I want you so badly I can barely breathe,” I end up saying in a gravelly voice.
It shoves us forcefully over the line, but the idea of her thinking I find her disgusting is too preposterous to bear.
“Really?” she asks, her expression softening. You’re… attracted to me?”
As if it were possible not to be. I scrub a hand down my face. “Excruciatingly so. When I feel the heat of your body in bed next to me, I want––”
June closes the distance between us, and my words are lost to the feel of her mouth moving against mine.
I have an idea of what’s happening based on the human sex vids I’ve stumbled across on the goubil while June and Akkal have been asleep, but I don’t know what it’s called or how to do it properly.
I slant my mouth against hers, fingers spread along her jaw as I attempt to follow her lead, but in the end it feels like I’m pushing my lips into hers, and she’s doing something entirely different. My fears are confirmed when she pulls back, giggling softly.
“Have you never kissed anyone before?”
“Kissss,” I repeat slowly. I like the word. The way it feels in my mouth. The way it makes me stare at hers. “Is that what we’re doing?”
She nods.
The blood rushes from my cock to the tips of my ears in embarrassment. “No, I haven’t.” I swallow the lump in my throat, along with the dread that she’s used to more practiced males. “But I’d like to, um, try again… if you would like.”
Her smile lights up the dark room. “I would. Yes.”
The yearning in her eyes reflects my own, and my dread evaporates.