Chapter 4 #3
Was she kidding? She didn’t seem like she was messing with him, but it was almost unbelievable that the first woman he’d felt even a smidgen of interest in not only lived in the same state as him, but the same freaking city! And even crazier when you consider that state was Alaska.
It was a sign.
Not that he normally believed in that kind of thing—but how could he not?
“What? Alaska isn’t that bad,” she said, misunderstanding his shocked silence.
“I know it’s not,” Shadow told her. “Because I live there too. Alaska. Fairbanks, specifically.”
“Seriously?”
“Yup. My team and I are stationed there on a special assignment. In the winter, we conduct arctic training for Army units.”
“Wow.”
The blush was back on her cheeks, but this time Shadow also saw a hint of desire in her eyes. It was all he could do not to put his arms around her and taste the plump lips he hadn’t been able to take his eyes off since he sat down.
He wasn’t able to keep the next question from popping out.
“You want to go out to dinner or lunch or something when we get home?”
She stared at him for a long moment. “Really?”
“Of course. I wouldn’t have asked if I wasn’t serious.”
“Why?”
“Why?” Shadow repeated, confused about the question.
“Yeah. Why? Why would you want to go out with me? I mean, I’m not exactly beauty pageant material.”
Shadow did his best not to show his anger. Not at her, but at anyone and everyone who’d ever made her feel less-than because of her looks.
“Thank goodness. I don’t want to date any of the contestants I’ve met here this week.
They aren’t the ones who’ve caught my attention.
They aren’t the ones who’ve had me struggling to pay attention to my assignment, the reason why I’m here.
Who have me scoping out every room I enter—not for danger, but to see if a certain redhead is there, and wondering if I might be able to finagle a way to talk to her again.
None of them are the woman I haven’t been able to stop thinking about ever since we first talked. ”
Brinley licked her lips uncertainly. Then blurted, “I’m not experienced.” She blushed a fiery red. “I mean, I haven’t been on many dates. I don’t know what the protocol is here.”
Shadow was more than glad it was evening, and his hard dick wasn’t as obvious as it would’ve been in the daylight.
This woman…hearing her say she wasn’t experienced made him want her all the more. Not because of what she may or may not have done physically with another man. But because if anyone deserved to be treated like a queen, he had a feeling it was Brinley Deaton.
“Screw protocol. I want you to say what you’re thinking. I want you to be real. Be yourself. And for the record, it’s been a hell of a long time since I’ve been on a date myself.”
“You aren’t…This isn’t…Shoot.”
Shadow took a risk and reached for her hand.
She didn’t resist when he rested their clasped hands on her thigh.
If she made the tiniest effort to pull away, he’d let go, but she didn’t.
Her fingers closed around his tightly, hanging on like she needed an anchor.
She was obviously a competent and successful businesswoman, but at that moment, all Shadow wanted to do was protect her. Shelter her. Make her feel comfortable.
“Don’t be afraid to tell me what you’re thinking, Brinley. I swear I won’t get upset or change my mind.”
She sighed. “Are you doing this because your friends put you up to it?”
It took every ounce of Shadow’s control not to show how pissed off her words made him, especially since he’d just said he wouldn’t get upset about anything she told him.
But the second he had the thought, he realized why she must’ve asked.
He didn’t think anyone would ask such a thing if they hadn’t had something similar happen to them before.
And that only made him angrier. Not at her, but at what she’d probably been through in the past.
“Hell no. I’m asking you out because I’ve been dreading the end of this assignment, knowing it would mean we’d go our separate ways and the chances I’d ever get to see you again would be slim.
I’m sure I jumped the gun and I’m probably moving too fast, but hearing that you not only live in the same state as I do, but in the same city has me so excited, I couldn’t hold back from asking you out immediately. ”
“Oh.”
“Has that happened before?” He asked the question gently, wanting to know the answer but dreading it all the same.
She nodded. “Yeah. Junior year of high school. It was a very long time ago, and I should be over it by now, but…it still hurts. A boy asked me to Homecoming. He picked me up, then left me at the dance and met up with the girl he’d actually invited, along with all his buddies.
They made a bet he couldn’t get the ugliest girl in school to go to the dance with him. He won.”
“Fuck him,” Shadow bit out. “Seriously. Kids are the fucking worst. But I can tell you without a shadow of a doubt that he didn’t deserve you.”
To his amazement, she smiled. “A shadow of a doubt?”
But he wasn’t ready to let this go. He lifted the hand that wasn’t holding hers and did what he’d wanted to do earlier.
He ran a finger over her cheek. “These freckles? They’re adorable.
And sexy. They make me wonder if you have them…
everywhere. And I know it’s inappropriate as hell, but all I can think about is tracing them with my tongue. Seeing how much of you they cover.”
He felt the heat in her cheeks under his finger.
“You aren’t ugly, Brinley. I hate everyone who ever made you feel that way in your lifetime.
You’re unique. You stand out in a crowd of women who try too hard to look like a bunch of Barbie dolls.
That asshole back in high school didn’t deserve your attention for two seconds.
Didn’t deserve your uniqueness. Your kindness.
Your loyalty. Because reading between the lines, I’m guessing your friend, Cypress, didn’t want to move to Alaska on her own, and having you with her was as much a comfort to her as it was to you.
“Please say yes to going out with me when we get home. And for the record, if you don’t want to, or if I’m freaking you out with my intensity, you can say no and that will be that.
I won’t harass you or make things uncomfortable for you.
I’ve just never been so attracted to a woman, and I don’t want to leave here without at least making an effort to see you again. ”
He was definitely babbling now, which wasn’t something he usually did, but Shadow was nervous. Scared Brinley would say no. He held his breath and forced himself to lower his hand from where he’d been touching her cheek.
“I’d like that,” she said quietly.
His breath came out in a long whoosh. “Thank fuck.”
She giggled, and the sound went straight to his dick, making it twitch in his pants. He wanted to make it his life’s goal to keep this woman smiling and laughing. Because he had a feeling she’d had way too little of that thus far.
A weight felt like it lifted from his shoulders, now that she’d agreed to see him again.
She didn’t try to pull her hand from his as they sat on the beach and slowly got to know each other.
They talked about their favorite foods, music, books, and everything in between.
Shadow soon found himself talking about his mom.
He hadn’t planned on it, just in case it made her sad that her own relationship with her mother obviously wasn’t good, but she encouraged him to talk by asking questions.
Once she’d reassured him that just because she didn’t have a healthy relationship with her family, didn’t mean she begrudged anyone else the same, he gladly told her about the amazing woman who’d raised him.