Chapter 7
Back at the cabin, Grant was swaying on his feet. It was late evening. I was still not used to the constant twilight ambiance. It messed with my sense of time. I had to constantly check my wrist watch to orient myself.
“Come on.” I guided him toward the bedroom, steadying him when he stumbled. “Let’s get you out of these layers.”
He let me peel off his heavy outer jacket, compliant as a child.
He was taller than me by a few inches and at least fifty pounds heavier.
Something about him letting me take care of him tugged at my heartstrings.
The mittens came next, then the wool cap that left his hair sticking up in every direction. Adorable.
“Sit,” I said, and he dropped onto the edge of the bed.
I knelt to unlace his boots, hyper-aware of how close I was to a certain area of his anatomy, the heat radiating off his body even through the thermal layers. I pulled off his boots and thick socks, setting them aside.
“Okay, you’re done. Lie down.”
He stretched out on his back with a groan that made my stomach flip. I pulled the blanket up over him, tucking it around his shoulders the way my mom used to do when I was sick. Quietly, I pulled back but his hand caught my wrist. His eyes were half-closed, but his grip was warm and sure.
“Always dreamed of this, Doc,” he murmured, voice rough with exhaustion. “Your hands on me.”
My heart stopped, then kicked into overdrive. But his eyes had already closed. His breathing evened out almost immediately, his hand going slack against my arm.
I hovered there for a long moment, staring down at him. His face looked younger in sleep, peaceful. The hard lines of competence and leadership smoothed away. My thoughts were a mess. My heart was beating loud enough to drown out all sounds. I backed out of the room, pulling the door mostly closed.
My laptop sat on the small table, data streaming in from the hydrophone array.
I opened the analysis software and stared at the waveforms without seeing them.
I adjusted filters I’d already optimized hours ago.
I checked signal strength I’d verified before.
I made myself tea but that just reminded me of the length to which Grant had gone to assure my comforts.
The cabin felt too small. Too warm. Too full of Grant’s presence even with him knocked out in the other room. I couldn’t focus. I checked my watch. It was midnight.
I grabbed my jacket and stepped outside.
The sharp cold cleared my head a bit. The sun hung low on the horizon, painting the sky in shades of gold and purple that had no business existing at midnight.
I stared at the sun that just wouldn’t set.
It just hovered there in perpetual twilight stubbornly, turning the ice chunks in the water into floating gems. Even the sun reminded me of Grant—of his determination, of his persistence, of his stubbornness.
I didn’t know what to do with myself. I’d come here to conduct research. Not have my heart turned inside out in a matter of two days by a man I had tried hard to forget.
I stood there for long moments, surrounded by more beauty than I had words for.
Suddenly a crack echoed across the bay—ice shifting somewhere in the darkness.
Then another crack followed. The sound was enormous, primal, like the continent itself was breathing.
It carried across the water, lonely and wild.
Hairs stood on the back of my neck. Needing to share this moment, I turned to Grant. “Do you hear that, isn’t it incredible—”
My words died. Of course he wasn’t there. He was asleep in our cabin.
I sucked in a breath as the realization hit. My first instinct had been to reach for him. Not a solo “this is scientifically significant” or even “I’m so lucky to witness this” thought.
I wrapped my arms around myself. I tried to find the moment where the arrogant high school jock I’d expected had transformed into whatever Grant actually was.
Except he’d never been arrogant. I’d assumed that.
I had projected it onto him based on nothing but his popularity and his position on the basketball team. And my own fear.
He’d never once acted superior about his diving expertise. He had never dismissed my research or talked down to me. He had never made me feel stupid for not knowing something about Antarctic operations.
He’d listened. He had asked intelligent questions. He had absorbed information about leopard seal vocalizations like it genuinely fascinated him. He had made suggestions about hydrophone placement that showed he’d actually understood the acoustic challenges I’d explained.
He cared about this experiment. About my work. Maybe more than anyone else ever had.
Over all the years, starting back in high school, I’d been so busy protecting myself from the person I thought he was that I’d completely missed the person he actually was.
Because the truth was I remembered him vividly.
I remembered that his jersey number was 4, that he liked pineapple on his pizza, that his favorite movie was Jaws, that he was an only child…
so many things I had tried to forget but never succeeded.
The ice cracked again, closer this time. I turned back to the cabin. To where Grant was sleeping, exhausted from diving in freezing water to place my equipment. The golden twilight caught on the cabin windows, making them glow.
Ice crunched under my boots. I liked him.
Not just attraction—though there was plenty of that, more than I wanted to examine right now.
But I liked him. I liked his competence and his humor and the way he made Viktor laugh.
I liked how he’d looked at me across the mess hall table with those warm eyes while our knees touched underneath.
I liked how he’d said ‘your hands on me’ like it was something he’d wanted for a long time. I liked who I became when I was with him.
***
Next morning, I woke up late and I padded into the tiny kitchen area and filled the kettle as quietly as possible. I opened one of the tea bags Grant had stocked for me, going through the familiar motions while my mind wandered back to last night.
I was sipping my first cup standing at the counter top, watching my laptop screen when I heard movement from the bedroom.
Footsteps. Then Grant appeared in the doorway, still in his thermal layers, hair mussed from sleep.
He looked at me for a long moment, something uncertain flickering across his face.
I smiled, suddenly overcome with shyness.
Pretty sure I was blushing. I turned around to dump the remnants of the tea into the teeny sink when strong arms wrapped around me from behind.
I froze, the teacup forgotten in my hand.
His body was warm and solid against my back, his breath stirring my hair.
He pressed his nose into the crook of my neck and just breathed.
My heart wasn’t racing. It had dissolved completely, turned to liquid warmth spreading through my chest. His arms tightened slightly, and I realized he was waiting. Giving me a chance to pull away, to make some excuse, to pretend this wasn’t what we both knew it was.
I set the teacup down carefully and let myself lean back into him. Grant made a low sound, almost a sigh, and turned me around in his arms.
His hands came up to frame my face, tilting my head back so I had to meet his eyes. They were darker than usual, intense in a way that made my breath catch.
“Is this okay, Doc?” His voice was rough from sleep, and oh boy, how it went straight to my dick.
“More than okay.” The words came out shy, barely above a whisper. I’d never been exactly a shy person. Nerdy and quiet, sure, but not a blushing damsel. Grant made me feel things I’d never imagined. I cleared my throat and tried again. “How’re you feeling? Hungry?”
His eyes darkened further. “Hungry for you.”
Damn, this man would be the death of me.
He gave me time. His gaze dropped to my mouth, then back to my eyes, asking permission without words. When I didn’t pull away, when I swayed slightly toward him instead, he lowered his mouth to mine.
The kiss wasn’t gentle. It started that way—Grant’s mouth soft against mine, asking, offering.
But the moment a small sound escaped me, everything shifted.
His hands slid from my face to my waist, pulling me flush against him.
I grabbed his shoulders for balance. He kissed me so hard that the counter edge pressed into my lower back but I didn’t care because Grant was everywhere, his tongue sliding against mine, his body pinning me in place.
I’d kissed before. A couple of times. Lame attempts with women. Now I realized just why. Those girls weren’t lame, the problem was that I’d been kissing the wrong people.
With Grant, I didn’t have to ‘work’ at the kiss. I lost myself in him. Grant tasted like sleep and want and minty from his toothpaste, his hands gripping my waist like he was afraid I’d disappear.
I kissed him back with everything I had, years of not knowing what I wanted, all of my desire suddenly condensed into desperate need.
He groaned and his tongue invaded my mouth.
One of his hands slid up my back, tangling in my hair and pulling hard.
The pain and pleasure singed through my veins, shocking me.
And just like that I was hard. Pressed against the counter with Grant’s body covering mine, I couldn’t hide it. Didn’t want to hide it.
The radio crackled to life on the wall next to us. Abnormally loud.
“Grant, Adrien, you guys up?” Sam’s voice. “We’re taking the big boat out to the northern edge. Do you need it today?”
I stilled in embarrassment as if Sam could see us. Grant’s breath came harsh and uneven when he finally pulled back just enough to look at me. His pupils were blown wide, lips wet and swollen. He didn’t let go of me. His hand stayed at my waist, his body still caging me against the counter.
When our eyes met, his were questioning. I shook my head slightly. We didn’t need the big boat. We didn’t need Sam and Viktor. I needed to be alone with him. Understanding flickered across Grant’s face. His mouth curved into something that wasn’t quite a smile, too turned on for that.
He reached for the radio with one hand, keeping the other firmly on my hip.
“We’re good, Sam.” His voice came out rough. “We’ll take the Zodiac. Just observing seal behavior today.” The smaller inflated boats were called Zodiac.
“Copy that. Radio if you need anything.”
“Will do.”
The radio went silent. Grant set it back on the wall cradle but didn’t move away from me.
“Just us?” he asked quietly.
“Just us.”
He blew out a breath. “All right, then get ready, Doc. I’m taking you out today to show you the wonders of Antarctica.”
That sounded like a date. I looked down, my cheeks felt warm, and slipped under him. Just before I could escape, he slapped my butt. “Hurry up.”
I yelped, turned around, and stared at him. He burst into laughter.
Shit. I’d liked that slap entirely too much. I turned and high tailed out of there.